Newbies Nest

[Samstone]

Newbies Nest

Hey Hey, Little Beagle... a 90 day yeehaw!
Sam

[Tess-2]

Newbies Nest

Guitarista;1537275 wrote: Hi Tess,

My take on this is based on my experience and that is......I was a 24/7 drinker, and for many years i didn't care if i lived or died....

Thanks very much G-man for your detailed understanding of the problem. I appreciate all that you wrote more that I can say.

For me, I did care if I lived or died: I was intent on dying. I could not bear the pain, shame, and tyranny of the alcoholic life. I had told no one about my drinking and I thought it was a big secret (though there are probably some who knew), and I wanted to annihilate myself and the problem altogether. It is only in retrospect that I am able to see that I was searching for a bit of hope and a compassionate hand to reach out to me. Help was there all along, but I was simply ignorant of it.

What I am learning, and now coming to grips with, is that folks who know that help is available, who have friends and family who care and who want to help, still choose alcohol over any assistance. That is what is becoming clear to me. That is what I struggle with and fight against. That is the "question" that keeps me awake at night.

I'm going to rest now. I'm going to let it be. I will help in any way that I am able to. But I must accept that not everyone wants help and not everyone is able to respond to help at this stage in their journey.

Thanks again, G-man, you have helped me to find a place of peace.

[Neddy Merrill]

Newbies Nest

[B]Be one of the fortunate ones who gets free before an unbearable price is paid. [/B]

Hi Guys, Couldn't sleep because I was awakened by one of my drunken neighbours who had forgotten his keys shouting at his wife to let him in.

Reading through the conversations I saw this from NS and thought: this is right on the money. Hard hitting but oh so true.

Neddy

[Lavande]

Newbies Nest

Another busy day in the nest I see ~ nice

Neddy, loved your story about your friend today, mostly because I like the no BS direct approach to just about anything. Good for you!

Little Beagle, CONGRATS on 90

Tess, I am also glad you are still here with us. Depression & AL are both a bitch & when combined can be deadly
I have learned the past few years that we don't need to understand everything. As long as we remain focused/mindful everything will be OK

JDG, hope you are having a better day! Greetings to everyone & wishes for a safe night in the nest. Special hello to G!

Lav

[Tess-2]

Newbies Nest

We are with you in you sleeplessness, Neddy. Alcohol turns all of us into people who we would rather not be. Hubby went golfing today with friend and had such a great time. They didn't need alcohol to have fun. So... the "magical thinking" child in me could wish that there was no alcohol available -- no way, no how. But that's never gonna happen. Too many people are making a lot of money on the backs of people who are hooked on the stuff. Anyway, I hope you can return to a peaceful sleep. Here is a poem written by Rudyard Kipling:

Oh! Hush thee, my baby, the night is behind us,
And black are the waters that sparkled so green.
The moon, o'er the combers, looks downward to find us
At rest in the hollows that rustle between.
Where billow meets billow, there soft be thy pillow,
Ah, weary wee flipperling, curl at they ease!
The storm shall not wake thee, nor shark overtake thee,
Asleep in the arms of the slow-swinging seas!

[Tess-2]

Newbies Nest

Lavande;1537290 wrote: ....Tess, I am also glad you are still here with us. Depression & AL are both a bitch & when combined can be deadly
I have learned the past few years that we don't need to understand everything. As long as we remain focused/mindful everything will be OK ....

I aspire to your wisdom, Lav. And I wish I could get everything said with just a few words, like you!! :H I'm gonna hang around and learn at the feet of those who have gone before me. Sweetest dreams. You are loved. ~

[hadit]

Newbies Nest

Hello Everyone, Wishing u all a happy af Sunday. Its freezing here about to head out for lunch (af one of course)Have been super busy lately and not keeping up with all the posts. Hope you are all keeping strong!

[Tess-2]

Newbies Nest

Hey Hadit - Good to hear from you!! Freezing?!! You are in winter; I am in summer. I just came in from watering all of the plants in my yard. We've not had a drop of rain in over a month. Also, I'm still on Saturday evening and you're on Sunday lunchtime. I hope you have a delightful lunch (no alcohol, of course!!). It's nice to have you back in The Nest. Enjoy your afternoon!!

[JackDanielsGirl]

Newbies Nest

Evening, Morning depending on where you are,

Just now in from work. This kind of work is for much younger people. Please pray for a job with better hours.

On a lighter note never heard "last call for alcohol" because I was already drunk in bed passed out. It felt good, all except for my feet.

Off to bed love you all.
JDG

[hadit]

Newbies Nest

Hi Guys, Just checking in again to say Hi. Had a nice lunch with my wife. No al for me. My wife had a glass of wine. Wished I could be normal and drink like her, but I know I can't, I am an alcoholic and now no that I can't fool myself and take even one drink. I have lost count of the af days I have had in about 3 months, but I do no that I have had a drink only on 2 occassions, so am pretty pleased with that. Going out for a meal is still a bit of a struggle, but not always, and it does seem to be getting easier. It just doesn't seem quite right, but after many years of heavy drinking I guess it takes time to feel normal. Like any relationship when its ended, it will take time. Hope you have all had ( or are having) a nice af Sunday. Its 6.45 pm where I am and freezing cold,wet and windy. Spring is on its way thank goodness. Good luck all!

[broken halo]

Newbies Nest

Hello Nesters and happy Sunday!

Hi Hadit, sounds like you are in a good place, glad you had a nice lunch!

JDG, I hope you find a job that suits you better really soon.

It's raining here today, but still warm. I went to the gym this morning and I am going to meet my daughter later for a coffee and then supermarket shopping. I hat going to the supermarket on my own and any time spent with my daughter is an absolute joy.

I hope everyone is safe and well this Sunday, looking forward to reading all the sober posts that will be incoming! :h

[Tess-2]

Newbies Nest

Hello Nesters,

It's not yet 5:00 on a Sunday morning here. I'm up and at 'em for no particular reason. I sometimes enjoy the solitude of the pre-dawn moments before the sun begins to rise and the birds begin to sing. My cravings always stopped with sunset and began with sunrise, which was quite odd. I still feel that I can let my guard down during the night but I must be vigilant against alcohol during the day, starting with the rising of the sun. This morning I found this while reading:

Things do not change; We change. -- Henry David Thoreau

JDG - Yes, you need a job better suited for you: Better hours and No alcohol. You will find that job. I will be cheering you on!!

Hadit - I wish I could be normal and have a drink with my husband, too. But that is never going to be possible. The end of drinking is the end of a relationship. Granted, an abusive relationship. But it still takes time to grieve and move on. Stay warm 'til spring arrives!!

Broken Halo - Good for you for getting to the gym on a regular basis. I've been inconsistent with yoga since the diagnosis of my mother's cancer. But things are settling in a bit and I hope to return to my usual exercise routine. Exercise helps me to feel better. I am delighted to hear that your daughter is an absolute joy. Enjoy your coffee and shopping!!

ALL Nesters - Have a fabulous day!!

[Lavande]

Newbies Nest

Good morning Nesters

Apparently it rained overnight, didn't hear a thing

Hadit, great to see you doing so well!
The longer you are AF, the more normal it feels ~ promise!

JDG, I can feel your foot pain Hope something else opens up for you very soon!

BH, I love spending time with my daughter too. She helps keep this granny feeling relatively young :H

Tess, you are up late & up early. You make me want to take a nap

Wishing everyone a great AF Sunday. I need to get to the supermarket as well,
Lav

[Neddy Merrill]

Newbies Nest

Tess-2;1537292 wrote: We are with you in you sleeplessness, Neddy. Alcohol turns all of us into people who we would rather not be. Hubby went golfing today with friend and had such a great time. They didn't need alcohol to have fun. So... the "magical thinking" child in me could wish that there was no alcohol available -- no way, no how. But that's never gonna happen. Too many people are making a lot of money on the backs of people who are hooked on the stuff. Anyway, I hope you can return to a peaceful sleep. Here is a poem written by Rudyard Kipling:

Oh! Hush thee, my baby, the night is behind us,
And black are the waters that sparkled so green.
The moon, o'er the combers, looks downward to find us
At rest in the hollows that rustle between.
Where billow meets billow, there soft be thy pillow,
Ah, weary wee flipperling, curl at they ease!
The storm shall not wake thee, nor shark overtake thee,
Asleep in the arms of the slow-swinging seas!

Hi Folks, I hope everyone is having a good day or evening or night depending on where they are.

Tess, the poem worked! I went back to bed and zonked out. I didn't wake up until after 10 this morning. I NEVER sleep that long even when absolutely steaming drunk. I am surprised you haven't had rain - I thought Seattle was always lashing down.

NM

[broken halo]

Newbies Nest

Hi Tess, the gym has been a major motivator with me with the AL and the cigarettes. I have rediscovered how much I love exercising, and it's not nearly as enjoyable when your system is full of poison! I had to give it up last year when my Mum had her stroke. Well I didn't have to, but I did. I was deep in AL's grip at that point. Mum passed away in March and I didn't cope well with that either.

Now I am back at the gym and I am surprising myself with how much I can do and really enjoying it. I hope you manage to get back to your yoga and exercise more often. I used to a bit of yoga myself but I just love running these days, it really inspires me for some reason.

Tess, it is such a tough time for you, yet you are always positive and inspiring with your posts. I loved the Kipling poem

Neddy, glad to read that you got back to sleep after your noisy neighbour incident. I hope you are having a good Sunday.

I loved spending some time with my daughter today. Plan for the evening is a quiet night, TV, do my nails, have a bath and get my stuff ready for work tomorrow. Oh, and NOT drinking anything stronger than green tea!