Newbies Nest

[Fallen Angel]

Newbies Nest

Welcome back JDG and well done on your 30 day AF :goodjob:

[Fallen Angel]

Newbies Nest

I think everyone is right I definitely need to tell some people, bit reluctant to do that at work as I have had so much time off through drinking, my job isnt permanent anyway its a fixed term contract so they wouldnt need much of an excuse to get rid of me.. thats why im dreading going in 2morra

[Elvis]

Newbies Nest

3June2013;1539738 wrote: Elvis, I wonder if your wife would consider going without her wine for now?

Yes, she would. She initially offered not to drink it, and I said it would be okay. Now I think I will ask her not to drink wine around me for the next few weeks or until I feel more comfortable.

Kept really busy this weekend. Spent all day Saturday cleaning and my wife even said the place looks great when she got home. I need to remember to slow down a bit now though. Rather than only a few alcohol free hours a day to get things done, I've got the whole day now, and the next, and next week, and so on. I already have some long overdue projects lined up for next few weekends to keep me busy. Sunday we spent the whole day at the beach. I'm glad we went because I had promised to take my wife to the beach on our anniversary, but I was too hungover to go. Starting a couch to 5K training program today at the gym.

[Elvis]

Newbies Nest

Fallen Angel, I tried to do it alone many times and it never worked for me. I would go back to drinking after a few days. For me it was too easy to fall back on drinking if I all I was lying to was myself. This time I told my wife and I immediately felt a huge weight lift off my shoulders. It's made all the difference in the world.

[Tess-2]

Newbies Nest

When you appeared, all that was thought to be lost was suddenly found. -- Francisco

Good Morning and Welcome to All Newcomers and to those who are Returning to The Nest this morning: Rahul, RitaNow, Woofer, Lacey, OnceMore, Fallen Angel, and Elvis.

When I stumbled across The Nest in January I felt that all was lost in my life. I was stuck in the misery of alcoholism and did not know how to get out. I had made a complete mess of myself and my life. I felt hopeless and was consumed with despair.

What I have found here are people who support me without judgement (because they have walked in my shoes), life-saving information about alcoholism, and the freedom to laugh and cry and be honest. This is a safe place to hang out while you recover.

I have an illness named alcoholism. You do too. The wiring in my brain is different than that of the non-alcoholic. That's the bad news. Here's the good news: Now that I understand this, now that I really get it and accept it, I am ready and able to take steps toward managing my illness. As the wounds begin to heal, as I begin to recover my life, I feel so much better. You will too. There IS hope!!

One of the first steps I took was to get rid of all the alcohol in my home AND replace the alcohol with non-alcoholic beverages that were appealing to me. I was accustomed to having a bottle of booze in my hand nearly all of the time. I needed a replacement.

I began to read the stories of other people on the MWO website. I gained knowledge and encouragement, which helped me to cope with my painful feelings of isolation. I was no longer alone. And then I started to write, to tell my story, to ask questions and talk about what was really going on with me. I invite you to keep writing. It helps so much!

We are happy that you are here!!

[OnceMoreWithFeeling]

Newbies Nest

Thanks for the welcome everyone.

Gosh, I've just realised I read the book before, back in 2006. I've been struggling with this for seven years... That's pretty scary.

:wow:

[Tess-2]

Newbies Nest

A happy Good Morning to my Nest Friends who have flown in this morning: Lav, Piper, 3June, Broken Halo, Byrdie, Lil' Beagle, Neddy, Allan, JDG, and Pinecone.

Hubs and I had a great BBQ with a couple of non-drinking friends last evening. It's awesome to be able to relax and chat and eat good food with people who do not feel the need to chug alcohol in an attempt to have fun.

As I walked our dogs this morning I thought about something that I read yesterday: "You don't recover from alcoholism by ONLY stopping the drinking. You recover by creating a new life where it is easier not to drink."

We don't need to create a completely new life, of course. (We couldn't, and wouldn't want to.) But we do need to make some changes if we are going to stay sober. Some of the changes that I have made are to avoid shopping in stores where I used to purchase most of my booze, to be honest with myself and others, and to relax in ways that help me to heal such as gardening or helping a neighbor.

As I listen to your stories I hear the many changes that you have made and continue to make in order to create your new life where it is easier not to drink. Some of you are cooking without using alcohol in the recipes, some are back at the gym, some are learning to navigate strong feelings of anger and anxiety. The list is endless. Every single one of you is an inspiration to me. Thank you!!

I wish for All of you a delightful alcohol-free day!! :rockon:

[Icanwithoutacan]

Newbies Nest

Hey all ....back for another try. So, here's to Day 1. Glad to see some familiar names and many new here

[Tess-2]

Newbies Nest

I can - Welcome back!! Bring us up to date. What has been happening with you? :welcome:

[Lavande]

Newbies Nest

Welcome back FA & Ican!
Get som e good plans together for yourselves, get your drinking triggers covered & stay close to the nest.

About telling other people what you are doing......
I suppose that's up to each of us as individuals.
Personally, I prefer my family & friends stay out of my business as I stay out of theirs
I don't want opinions (unless I ask for them)! I felt confident & extremely hopeful when I joined MWO. I did not respond well to an unsolicited opinion that I needed to go to AA. He had no knowledge & no business telling me anything :H

No one knows you better than yourself - you know, deep down what you really need to do. Be honest with yourself & get the job done

[Fallen Angel]

Newbies Nest

Yes I suppose it is just finding what works for the individual, I found the AA meeting really helped to hit it home to me, but like you said they may not be for everyone.. Im looking forward to an AF weekend where I can finally get things done around the house that Ive been putting off, I know I will feel better with everyday Not many more hours left for the day.. day 1 is almost over well done guys

[Overit44]

Newbies Nest

Good morning. Just checking in to let you all know that I drank this weekend. Just 1, no big deal, the world didn't end, I don't even feel bad about losing my quit date or all of my days racked up, because I quit counting a long time ago. I also didn't get a buzz or a relaxing feeling from it. Nothing! Why did I? Because you always wonder if you can. Will I again? I don't know. It did nothing for me and I really like being the cool kid who doesn't need to drink but instead is healthy and vibrant.

Just being honest and accountable.

Have a good day.

[Caz 22]

Newbies Nest

Hello Nesters

Well I had a fantastic AF weekend, I was really hesitant to attend a great friends surprise 30th birthday party.It was so much fun.
My husband and I took our own cooler ( he only had one beer as we were out of town and driving ).
I thought our friends would question my non drinking but it was all good ( soda and lime just looks like G and T ) . I had great fun and laughed a lot .
It was also great as the weather cooled rather quickly a lot of people switched from booze to tea or hot chocolate..yeah so I didn't look out of place requesting a cup of tea.
What a great Sunday, went for a huge hike ( with hubby ) and then stayed home watching the fabulous Thick of it after the announcement of the fabulous Peter Capaldi as the new Doctor Who...

Have a great day folks.

[broken halo]

Newbies Nest

Hi Nesters! Nice to see all the new faces and those coming back for a second shot. Fallen, great to hear you are close to getting day 1 under your belt, if AA works for you, that's great.

Lav,

No one knows you better than yourself - you know, deep down what you really need to do. Be honest with yourself & get the job done

I am so glad you posted this. Sometimes I read some comments and think maybe I am NOT doing something I should be, but I agree with you. For me it's more about choice and mindset than method, but that's me. Everyone has to do their own thing and just get the job done, as you say!

Work was hectic today, but good. I am home, had a bite to eat and now getting ready to go to the gym to meet my daughter. She's only 26 years younger than me so I won't challenge her too much!:H

Tess, I totally agree with you about the changes. Next month I am making an adjustment to my working hours that will benefit me and my sobriety in a big way. I would have been too afraid to make that change when drinking, but it's absolutely the right thing for myself and my family.

Caz, well done on your AFweekend, soda and lime tastes so much better than G&T AND it doesn't give you the heebie jeebies the next day!

I am feeling so positive about my new life. I hope everyone in the Nest is feeling positive too, no matter where you are in your journey. I think Neddy said something similar earlier on, it's not about giving something up, it's about taking yourself and your happiness back.

[NoSugar]

Newbies Nest

Hi, Woofer, Lacey, OMWF, Fallen Angel, and I Can,
Welcome to, or back to, the Newbies Nest. Stay close - read and post at least once every day.
Please make getting free of alcohol your # 1 priority --- it is amazing how other things fall in place once you are thinking clearly and unburdened by guilt and regrets.

Congratulations Piper on 30 days! There are 5 new people who are now on your trail to an AF life- never let them catch you by never giving up !

Hi, Overit
It is great that nothing horrible resulted from your drinking but since nothing positive came from it either, why not just put it in the past and continue on your cool kid (I love that !) path? There is a thread about relapse -- for some people, things started out innocuously but quickly got out of control: https://www.mywayout.org/community/f9...ect-78410.html.

Hi to others who have stopped by - BHalo, Neddy, AllanKay, Lav, Byrdie, LB, 3June, Tess, JDG, Pinecone, Elvis, and Caz.
Wow - This must be a huge nest!! It is cool that we have people at all stages of getting free of AL here helping one another get or stay quit.

Have a great day! :h NS