Newbies Nest

[broken halo]

Newbies Nest

I am trying to look on the bright side today. I feel and look like sh** and for once it has nothing to do with AL! I never was very good at being sick! I can't go to the gym, couldn't even manage a walk, and am feeling poorly and frustrated. I better be well by tomorrow, I can't handle this inactivity!

Byrdie I love that quote about lying. Particularly to yourself. I did it for years and all I was doing was enabling my drinking even more.

No more lies. No more self deceit and self destructive behaviour. Good on you Rahul!

[Rahulthesweet]

Newbies Nest

Day 9: feel very low ... Made my wife cry ... I have been so dis honest with her .... Lied her all the times ....our marriage is in such a bad shape ... (( only good thing no AL in my life ... Not today at least ... Help me all come out of this misery ... I feel very lonely ... And depressed ...

[Miley]

Newbies Nest

As advised by Rahul, I am coming to the nest. I chose to drink last night and deal with the pain of bringing things up in counseling yesterday that were very painful. Things I had swept under the rug for many years, even since childhood. Basicallly, my step-father was emotionally abusive and so was my ex-husband. My step-father is still emotionally abusive and I have a very limited relationship with him. Counseling was a step I decided to take, to deal with my issues once and for all....also with the hope that it would help with my drinking probem, as well.

Needless to day, drinking only made things worse and I am pissed at myself today. However, I refuse to give up and I will keep going to counseling. If it becomes painful, I will give myself permission to cry instead of drowing those feelings with AL...this is what got me in trouble in the first place

[Miley]

Newbies Nest

Rahul....I am sorry you are feeling so bad today but thank you for suggesting that I post in the nest.
AL makes all of us liars. The good news is that you are doing something about it. 9 Days is awesome. I am sure with persistence and maybe with some counseling, you can repair your marriage. My Husband is very disappointed with me today....I can tell, although he hasn't said anything....but I know he loves me and I am sure your wife loves you. Let's give them something to be proud of by getting this AL monkey off of our back!

[NoSugar]

Newbies Nest

Rahul and Miley,

AL has caused us problems. We have used it to cover up problems. It makes us into liars, cheaters, and sneaks.
Nothing good comes from it for all of us who have found our way here. And here can be such a good place to be if you want to get free of this burden .

I'm sorry about your marriage problems, Rahul, but you are taking the necessary steps to be able to deal with them. Keep being honest and if your wife can keep an open heart, she will learn to trust you.

Miley, I so admire that you used the word "choice". You aren't trying to pretend that this is something that just happened. It sounds like some things truly have happened to you that were not at all your fault. In my opinion, it isn't even your fault that you became addicted to alcohol. But, you are taking responsibility for getting over the addiction and that will make all the difference. Good to see you in the Nest :l.

I hope you start feeling better, BHalo! When I used to not drink for a few days in a row when I was sick, I tried to convince myself that that meant I wasn't addicted... .

Belated congratulations to Sam and Mr. G. With all the struggles we have, it is so good to celebrate all successes, too.

:h NS

[Byrdlady]

Newbies Nest

Rahul....this is going to be quite a ride. But I can assure you this....you will never have 2 bad days in a row. I'm so sorry you are having a bad day....but you just hang in there, and when you get up tomorrow, I bet you'll have a whole new mindset. Shit happens, even when you are sober. We have to learn a whole NEW set of coping skills rather than turning to the numbing escapism that AL provides. THIS is part of the growth. It's not always easy, but it is worth it. Do whatever it takes to stay sober today....eat, or go for a walk. I will assure you that AL will only make a bad situation worse. I spent a year on that rollercoaster. Every quit gets harder not easier (like you'd expect). Protect your quit like a pot of gold. Sit down and talk to your wife or go get her a card or MAKE her a card...write her a note from the heart. We didn't get into this mess overnight so it takes a while to get out of it. You will earn her trust back in time. After all, our spouses love US, it's the AL they hate.
Miley, I'm glad to see you back. Our past sure can bring up a shitstorm....but drinking doesn't make it go away....I tried! To live is to learn, so welcome back and we will get this all worked out. One day at a time, one 15 minutes at a time! Getting rid of AL sure makes an awful lot of things better, but even that doesn't change the past. But learning new coping skills will help you in all areas of your life. I try to keep that Serenity Prayer in mind.....'help me change the things I can, accept the things I can't and the wisdom to know the difference.' Settle in and feel free to talk...you are in good company here.... we've all been broken in some way...but as Ernest Hemmingway said, we are all stronger in the broken places. So glad you are here.

Try to do something nice for yourselves....cut yourself some slack but no matter what...finish this day without AL! Tomorrow, you'll be so proud that you did. Every day I wake up, I know I am!! Hugs to all, Byrdie

[broken halo]

Newbies Nest

Rahul :l You did the right thing, stay close to your wife, and to the nest. it's hard and kind of scary when you finally make the changes you know you have to make, but worth it.

Miley, thank you for joining us. You are so right when you say drinking only makes things worse. Drinking solves nothing, it only makes things worse. :welcome:

[a448313]

Newbies Nest

Hi everyone,

I am new here. I want to stop drinking so badly and I do stop - for 2 days maybe. I drank last night - 2 bottles of wine. I am scared of withdrawal. I can't go into treatment because I have family responsibilities to take care of on a daily basis. I have tried outpatient and antabuse. Antabuse worked until I decided not to take it anymore.

Any ideas on how to stop?

[Neddy Merrill]

Newbies Nest

Hi there fellow nesters, I haven't been about for a few days - was I missed? - as I took a spontaneous trip to London. Had a great time catching up with an old friend and his family. Back to work tomorrow and really looking forward to it. I'll try to check in in the morning before I head out. Best wishes to all my MWO friends - particularly BH! Off to bed now. Good night.

[Miley]

Newbies Nest

NS, Byrdie and BH....thank you so much for the support. I am determined that I am going to work through this. I have absolutely NO desire to drink at all today. I am sitting on the couch and watching a surfing competition. It reminds me of urge surfing....something that I have forgotten to do. Byrdie....I love your no-nonsense way of putting things. You are so real.....dealing with this stuff sure does bring up a shit storm, but it's worth it. It will only help me in the end.

A44- Welcome and glad to have you here. That damn wine! I am probably not the best person to be giving advice at the moment but one thing that really resinated with me when I read it today was a post by Byrdie in the Toolbox....she re-posted Sunflower's thoughts on acceptance. The Toolbox is very helpful and this post is on the last page and is definitely worth a read.

[Wine-no!]

Newbies Nest

Hi Guys
I have now finally accepted I can't drink again.. It feels a relief actually.... I started a thread today 'Think I've finally got it'. I think I finally have.
Am in bed but will be back tomorrow.
X
PS be strong Miley... You came back quickly which shows great strength and determination. Don't be too hard on yourself x

[little beagle]

Newbies Nest

Miley :welcome: Just reading and posting here will Make you feel better. Like Byrdie said we are all broken in some way but this place really helps put you back together.
Rahul lying is a slippery slope. It does take awhile for the other person to trust you again. But I think that trust is easier built then lost. Especially when it is someone who really loves you. I think once we stop lying to ourselves the change is obvious.
Get to feeling better bhalo.
Thank you for that inspiration Byrdie. I can always appreciate words of wisdom.
:flush: This goes with your jokes the other day.

[little beagle]

Newbies Nest

A44 welcome. Glad you are joining us.
Yes Neddy you were missed.
I guess I missed last page of posts.

[3June2013]

Newbies Nest

Hi there nesters I'm away in the other London (Ontario) having a visit with my sister. Her house is pretty much AF so it's easy to hang out, no stress. I haven't been keeping up with posts but I'll catch up soon I promise! Stay the course you will be happier for it! Talk soon my friends!

[Lavande]

Newbies Nest

Good evening Nesters!

Had myself another super busy day, got a lot done & bought myself a new TV too
It's awesome to have some extra $$ on hand when you're not feeding your addictions!

Hello & welcome A44! Glad you decided to join us.
The best idea to stop drinking - go to the Health store here on the site & download the MWO Book. Then go to the Tool box & use some of the thousands of ideas in there to help you out a plan together for yourself.
Withdrawal symptoms don't happen to everyone. It depends on how much & how long you have been drinking. Be safe, read the book & get medical help if needed.

Wishing everyone a safe night in the nest!

Lav