Newbies Nest

[Mein Sonnenschein]

Newbies Nest

Hello Nest. I just want to say I'm happy to still be here. I'm keeping up my quest for health. Had a lovely turkey and veggie lunch with some home-made cinnamon walnuts as a late afternoon snack. I just keep thinking "be good to yourself" which means keeping the AL away. Last night I did not tidy up the house as I wanted so that is my plan for tonight. If the rain stays away I'll spend an hour at the driving range. Keeping up the self confidence for today. ODAAT.

Wine-no... I'm so sorry to hear about your husband. I am sure that was a complete shock. I'm thinking of you and I'm so happy to hear you didn't run for the bottle because I can't say that I would have the same strength. Good for you! :l

Much love and strength to you all today.

[rooniferd]

Newbies Nest

Hi all, Day 23 here. I'm feeling really good!

I'm concentrating on two main things this week:

(1) I'm replacing drinking time with healthy time. This may sound a little extreme, but I went out and purchased some speed skates at the local skating rink yesterday. I used to be a speed skater when I was younger. Now that I'm 45, I haven't been in years. But I've never stopped thinking about it. I always felt so free on those skates - like nothing else mattered in the whole world. I climbed up in my attic over the weekend and pulled out my old skates. Of course, they aren't usable. So I bought new ones! Those nights that I would typically be sitting at the bar, wasting time and money (and brain cells), now I can head up to the rink and get lost in the fun!

(2) I've been so mad at the "beast" for so long. Now I'm just damn scared of him. If I let him, he has the power to ruin my life. With him running the show, I'll surely become the fat, old alcoholic woman sitting at the bar who I never thought I would become. I will probably get more DUIs, since all judgement goes out the door when I drink.

And one thing that really scares me....

I have two sickly siblings (mostly from being morbidly obese) and an elderly father. I just know I'm going to get "that call" one night when I need to rush to the hospital. What if I'm drunk? I can't do that to my family. I have to be there for them. They would certainly be there for me.

So, here's to being scared to death of the beast and picking up a new healthy hobby to replace drinking time!

Have a great day, everyone, and keep moving forward!

[Snapdragon]

Newbies Nest

Hello everyone - trying to scrape myself back into the picture here but really struggling. Don't know what's wrong with me, but the last few weeks I hit a real depression - even felt like ending it all a few times. I'm normally a really upbeat, happy person.

So I have a plan. Today I'm going to start Antabuse again and I've changed my Avatar to signify a fresh start!

Wine no - I totally understand how you feel. A similar thing happend to me a month ago when I found an email conversation my hub had with a woman he used to know when he took the kids to school. She had emailed him to ask if he wanted to meet up for a coffee and he had emailed back saying that he would like to meet her (give him his due he did say that he was happily married and not wanted to spoil that) and had given her his number telling her to call him, but if he sounded 'off' he was in suspicious company! I was devastated! Unlike you, I wasn't strong and it was this that sent me back to the bottle after 3 months sober. I wanted to get back at him - but in the long run it is me who has suffered and me who is back to square one. Whatever happens, stay strong - I'm sure it was just a bit of innocent flirting and it sounds like it is all in the past now.

Hope to draw a line under the last month now and will be checking in regularly. So good to be back in the nest.

[Snapdragon]

Newbies Nest

Hi Rooni - we cross-posted but I just wanted to say how awesome that you've taken up skating again! I used to be a gymnast until I was about 16 - don't think my body is up for raking that hobby up again :H

I will think of you gliding around the rink - I must find a good hobby to replace drinking too.

[rooniferd]

Newbies Nest

Welcome back, Snap! Yes, spouse/boyfriend troubles can really lead to the bottle. I had a husband several years ago who didn't just flirt - he downright cheated on me - over and over again. I found out after we had split up, and boy was I mad. Drunk and mad topped with jealously is a really really bad combination for me (and probably for most people). But like you said, in the end, I just hurt myself. I wanted to get revenge so badly. Looking back, the best revenge would have been me becoming a better, stronger person who kicked the alcohol habit and replaced it with something healthy like losing those extra pounds and getting into the best shape of my life! But I didn't. I made an ass out of myself on more than one occasion....

Similar thing happened with a guy I dated after that.....I was drunk, mad, and jealous. And yes, I made a complete ass out of myself...again....

So now I'm single. I'm getting sober and I'm working on getting back in shape. I need to love myself before I start another relationship.

[rooniferd]

Newbies Nest

Cross posted AGAIN!! :H

[Londoner]

Newbies Nest

Mid-week breeze. Out with a BIG crowd on the weekend, so that will be a massive challenge. Lots of people I do not know too. Just keep thinking of what I have said already.

I read other peoples posts on here and realise how well off I am - being a weekly binger in comparison to the daily drinker.

[Byrdlady]

Newbies Nest

Morning, Nesters!
Rahul, between the magic Day 13 and your hat award (Day 30) there is a massive party that we throw ourselves. THE PITY PARTY!! This is where the 'high' of having gone AF for all those days and the reality of going AF converge. I believe this is the BARGAINING stage of grief...(remember the 5 stages?) 'Maybe I didn't have a problem after all? Maybe I CAN control this thing, I've proven it the last 15 days!! What was all the fuss about? I'll just drink on weekends!!'. This has derailed many a nester....but it doesn't have to. ACCEPTING that this is just another phase of growth really helps...AND you don't want to miss out on the hat, don't forget!! This is where I kept falling...so take it from ME!! Stay the course over this little rough spot and you will be so happy you did!! Try to reign in your sugar cravings, but you don't have to completely do that...do what you have to do to stay AF....if that means a bag of potato chips, so be it. We can work on that in a couple weeks!! What you are experiencing is NORMAL! Just take it a day at a time and the next thing you know, you will be getting fitted for your hat! Get to that 30 day mark no matter what and no matter who!!!

Londoner, I worry about that last line you wrote....how lucky you are to be a weekly binger instead of a daily drinker. Mine started on the weekends, too...until the binging became daily. Ours is a progressive disease....if we plotted our intake over the years we'd all see that ours has done nothing but increase. So I don't know how lucky you are with the weekend binges, but you are lucky in the fact that you've caught it before it progressed to daily use. I worry about your heavy drinking company this weekend. Can you get out of it? If not make a rock-solid plan....otherwise we'll be right here next Tuesday wondering what happened? PLAN ahead and you will be so glad. Starting over sucks (see the year, 2010 under Byrdlady). Protect your quit with all you've got!!

Off to work!! Back on my head now.....ehehehe. Hope everyone has a easy, sober day!!! Byrdie

[JackDanielsGirl]

Newbies Nest

Morning all it is getting better every day no shakes today have to work. I think that will be good for me it will occupy my time so I don't think about how fatigued I am. Slept last night ready for this to be completely gone and get back to myself. I miss me and so does my family. Emotions still cycling. I don want anymore day ones or twos you get the message. I have made a promise to myself to always post and wait for reply if I even think abt drinking. Love to all you are the best

[K9Lover]

Newbies Nest

rooniferd;1546010 wrote: Drunk and mad topped with jealously is a really really bad combination for me (and probably for most people). But like you said, in the end, I just hurt myself. I wanted to get revenge so badly. Looking back, the best revenge would have been me becoming a better, stronger person who kicked the alcohol habit and replaced it with someone healthy like losing those extra pounds and getting into the best shape of my life! But I didn't. I made an ass out of myself on more than one occasion....

Similar thing happened with a guy I dated after that.....I was drunk, mad, and jealous. And yes, I made a complete ass out of myself...

So now I'm single. I'm getting sober and I'm working on getting back in shape. I need to love myself before I start another relationship.

OMG Rooni, I could have written this! I drank AT my ex-boyfriend for years. We fought and made up, fought and made up, etc for YEARS. It tires me out just thinking about it now. I have been single for years and loving it!

Many of you know I've been trying to quit smoking forever. Well I'm not saying I quit...but I didn't smoke yesterday...or today. Just sayin'

[Lizann]

Newbies Nest

Byrde

Wow was your earlier post meant for me! I feel like that's exactly where I am! It's a process and right now I'm scared I can't continue. Need to pull myself together and continue to take it one day at a time and not look to far ahead.

[Rahulthesweet]

Newbies Nest

Hello Nester,

Thanks for the encouragement and guidance. As I see the challenge has just begin. I should feel over confident that HAVE done it ... I must stay away from AL.

Best of Switzerland is there are lots of parks... And my hotel is next to a lake . So in morning went for a job and now again in evening going for a job ...

See you guys ...

[Lizann]

Newbies Nest

Good for you JDgirl! You're sounding much better today! Good plan you have in place, I would be wise to do the same!

[Byrdlady]

Newbies Nest

Lizann, it really is a process, but if you will take a leap of faith with us, and keep following...you will NOT regret it. I was telling NoSugar the other day that it was just blind luck that kept me following in Lav's footsteps....but thank heaven I did...I am so grateful that I just blindly followed her!!! I TRUST her. I'm glad I latched onto the right coattails!!! It would have been just as easy to follow someone else off the cliff!
Love you, Lav!!
Rooni, you are kicking butt!
Everyone doing so well~!! Swell, even! Keep it going!!
Byrdie

[Neddy Merrill]

Newbies Nest

Hi Nesters, it's great to hear so many success stories even in the face of some very traumatic personal situations. It might be tempting but please remember, a drink will NEVER make a bad situation better. My best wishes to all. NM