In life we all make mistakes, we do things we wouldn't normally do because we are not ourselves in that moment, but being human we have to realize we aren't supposed to be perfect we are going to make mistakes but have to realize if we never made mistakes (as bad as they may be and we all have our mistakes to make....) we wouldn't be here we would be gods and this earth couldn't teach us anything. I know I have made more mistakes then I want to admit but I also know that I made the mistakes without realizing that as humans we all err........No one is perfect so unless you are perfect.....you have no grounds to claim so. js Some of us take longer than others to learn the lessons.
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In life we all make mistakes, we do things we wouldn't normally do because we are not ourselves in that moment, but being human we have to realize we aren't supposed to be perfect we are going to make mistakes but have to realize if we never made mistakes (as bad as they may be and we all have our mistakes to make....) we wouldn't be here we would be gods and this earth couldn't teach us anything. I know I have made more mistakes then I want to admit but I also know that I made the mistakes without realizing that as humans we all err........No one is perfect so unless you are perfect.....you have no grounds to claim so. js Some of us take longer than others to learn the lessons.
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Newbies Nest
and tonite Again I am learning and was so proud of myself for thinking I have this under control then the guilt ate me alive and AL was there to say hey I got your back and will make sure I stab it twice as deep just in case you still haven't got it..........sorry I am so weak..........feel like I should have this under control...........but I'm not perfect but I want to be the best I can be and love me unconditionally for plain old me........Valerie
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Praying.....please pour the rest of it down the drain....save your poor liver the trouble of having to process it. Try and get some rest tonight....Byrdie
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Newbies Nest
Good evening Nesters,
Praying, as I mentioned earlier today - if you truly want to quit you will find a way.
It is essential to make a good plan for yourself. Get your drinking triggers covered. Decide ahead of time how you are going to handle stress, anger, lonliness, etc. without drinking! Get all of the AL out of your house & vow to buy no more! That's what I did & it worked. You can do this, you have to prepare
Wishing everyone a safe night in the nest!
LavAF since 03/26/09
NF since 05/19/09
Success comes one day at a time :thumbs:
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Day 3
Phew !! Finally got back to my Nest ! ( home,comfort zone,MWO )
Welp .. lets see here. I was on a roll ... cruzin along .. going good ( even told Fisher that today was "in the bag" ).
So I got in the car and picked up the boys for their first soccer game ( Practice was last night and it felt great ! ). Got to the school and could not find a parking spot for 10 minutes as everything said No Parking. Grr #1. The kids start playing and its really nice to hear them laughing and having a good time. Next thing you know the coaches and a few parents on both teams start Yelling at the kids. You know the "Tommy get overthere push push jamie get your guy billy block". .. Constantly! Non-stop! Im thinking to myself chill out on the kids people !@@# (7-11 year or something). Grrr # 2. At halftime when the teams was huddled..I told my wife that the boys would like to spend the night with me this sunday. NOPE. (which technically I could have just told the kids to get in the car and go home with me right then and there) GrrrR #3.. At this point im getting a little pissed off from all this crap that has transpired in the last Hour or so ( Oh and Not having a smoke for the last 3 friggin hours ! ).
**** I cant tell you how much this is helping me just to be able to express myself with you guys !! Up till now I have been Very positive as you can tell from most of my posts in the forums but No joke I was at "That Point about 45 minutes" ago on my way back home .. Almost having to pull over to :upset: for a few :l :l THANK YOU very much for being here.
Ok.. continuing .. A little later the boys asked if they could come home with me and watch a movie. Basically a NO .. GRRrr #4.
On the way to go get them some Ice cream It started Pouring. Cant see a friggen thing ! Hearts thumping away .. got the kids at rush hour in the pouring rain .. Stressin out. Almost missed my turn at a major intersection lol.
Found a place a block away from grandmas house and got the kiddos some small sundays. So as we sit down to eat these tastey fixens I get a text. MOM:"you guys can watch a movie tonight if they get home by 9pm". .. .. Um.. Tell me NOW !! WTF ? Well if she could have just said Yes to begin with at the soccer game then we could have done it !
I would have sat and talked to them But I had to get back to my nest. No ifs ands or buts. ASAP ! Heavy guilt lashed out and took a strangle on me very quickly because I had to chose between Me or the Kids.
You told me to get in here and post if I ever had the Urge. So I did ( even though its a novel ) and I already much better just by unloading on you guys. Thank You !
Hey fisher .. If your reading this .. Thanks man....more than you know.Progress lies not in enhancing what is, but in advancing toward what will be. - Khalil Gabran
AF: 9-10-2013
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Newbies Nest
Gambler- I had a yucky aggravating day like that last week- you did great!!!!
It sounds like your wife was mulling over trusting you and offering an olive branch so maybe look at it like that?
Hello all newbies! DLD and Regaining.....welcome - make a goal : mine is 30 days and I'm on day 10 and feeling amazing
Regaining, have you talked to a dr. About depressin? You sound pretty down - just concerned
Night all
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dear hubby is still at work, this late, always being the responsible one. I decided to put away the lovely jambayala I made for dinner. That's when I saw the box of wine from the wine club that he is going to take to the offsite storage. I'm not going to have any of it, not going to open it or think about. First place I came was the nest. Going to stay logged in, go wash the dishes and put on the morning coffee. Will check back in a few.10/14/13: I am truly grateful for another day in this amazing life. I'm sober and mindful of every moment.
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Dave please don't feel bad for taking time for you right now. Do what it takes to make it through this first month or so. You need to do this in order to be a better father. Think of it as time invested.
Welcome newbies!! This is the best place to come and get help. You can do this.
3June I am impressed!
Halo glad your schedule is changing. Sounds like a good thing.
I hope everyone has a great af time.No matter how far you go or how fast you run, you can't get away from yourself. ....said at an AA meeting. It stuck with me.
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trail mix
Eating some real yummy trail mix in bed and waiting for hubby to get home from a very long day. Watching the news and feeling on top of things. I'm not drinking today. Thanks all - have a good night.10/14/13: I am truly grateful for another day in this amazing life. I'm sober and mindful of every moment.
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Hi Nesters.
Gambler, when I first started reading your post I thought 'oh no...he's had a drink!'
I am so glad to read that you came here instead. Isn't it great when you can sidestep the old reaction to problems, deal with them without drinking and start to realise you are much bloody stronger than you actually thought? Well done
You too I'm strong. You both struggled and dealt with it admirably.
Regaining, it sounds like you are in a really bad place right now, I really hope you can find a way out.
Thanks LB, I am up super early this morning, have lots to do at work this morning and I am actually really excited!
I hope everyone has a safe and happy day. To those on day 1, or even struggling to get to day 1, please keep reading the posts here. We have all been where you have been, there is hope. Don't give up.
'Today is the first day of the rest of your life', someone very wise once said.It might sound cheesy, but it's true! :lWhatever you can do or dream you can, begin it. Boldness has genius, power and magic in it! ~ Goethe
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Newbies Nest
Same here, Dave. I started to read your post and thought "Well, he is on day 1 tomorrow". I am proud of you, bro!
I am also very moody these first days, many things annoy me, I feel a bit scared and anxious all the time and get startled so easily. But it never gets better if we take the bottle.
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Newbies Nest
Good Friday morning, Nesters. The beginning of an AF weekend!
Gambler, I think in the first days, it's important to put yourself, with regards to your sobriety, before everything else! EVERYTHING. With the the kids, as LB said, you're working on an investment. When you (I have to as well) think of how much you put yourself first while drinking.. we're making ourselves better people for our children and families. Really great that you rushed home to get it all out here. Just keep on your path-- you're doing great!
You, too, I'mstrong-- In bed with trail mix sounds really nice. You will be so happy with yourself tomorrow morning. Like everyone always says here, you'll never regret not drinking!
Bhalo, I can imagine how shift work is an enabler. I'm glad you'll be getting a friendlier work schedule. Are you a social worker/therapist? Just being nosy.
Cdev, crazy, with our old daily stops! I finally went in and told the guy who owns my favorite wine shop, the one I walk past everyday and used to buy from everyday, that I'm not drinking anymore. He said, oh what a shame!! I still wave to him when I go by!
That post from the toolbox is so helpful. For me, usually around this time of almost 2 weeks, especially pertinent, are "I'm doing so well, one won't hurt me now", and "I'll just stop again....". This time I don't feel it, though. I have "I will never drink again and I will never change my mind" as my way of life. And I believe it with everything I am. Having said that, I have to prove it to myself for a very long time and I dare not become complacent. I'm awaiting that little voice that will surprise me at some point.
Finally got my butt into the gym yesterday and was allowed to remember how much it helps for over all well -being. So this is Day 13 and I do feel really good.
Sending strength to everyone-- especially those struggling. I'm still so new that I don't feel like I can give any advice. I just keep going back to Lav and Byrdie and the toolbox. But as Lav said, we have to want it so badly that we find a way-- especially getting through those first couple days!!:l
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