Newbies Nest

[Fisher80]

Newbies Nest

I'm Strong and in Control;1556932 wrote: Gambler - quitting smoking was one of the hardest things I've ever done. Give yourself some time to handle one life-threatening habit at a time! You are doing great.

I?ve also noticed that I?m smoking more now that I?m AF. Staying away from booze is hard enough so smoking has to wait.

[MinStar]

Newbies Nest

Morning. Just checking in. Had a rough sleep again- still fresher in the mornings than I would be if I wasn't AF

Available- enjoy dating! I miss those days a little :-)

Off to join my girl for a cheeky nap. Happy Monday nesters!

Oh and I agree. One habit at a time....x

[available]

Newbies Nest

Min its overrated really but hey I meet some interesting people and i am sure there are more to come!

I am having rough sleeps too, toss and turn all night and wake up blah but as you said still fresher than if i was hungover. I would not mind the headaches ending too although they are getting less but have not done 16 days in oh god knows when!

I used to love napping with my babies but alas my baby is now 20 although i am sure he would not say no to napping with his mum.

My Monday is nearly done and dusted.

[Londoner]

Newbies Nest

5 weeks in. A big benefit is:

It is nice to have a genuine smile on me. Not one I am faking. I have never been a smiler. Always felt forced.

True feelings are starting to emerge. One's that my sub-par brain/mental state was not able to feel as a result of the damage "social binge drinking" was doing to me.

[Stupot]

Newbies Nest

I love catching up with all the weekend's messages when I get to work on a Monday (yes, I know, I should be working!).
Well, day 11 for me, feeling proud but still so so tired. Mind you, I have been tired for about 20 years and I don't imagine the extreme sugar binge diet I appear to now be on is helping matters! But as the lesser of two evils, I guess for now it is OK. I joined a gym about a minute's walk from my house last week - I had great intentions to go on Saturday while my daughter was with her dad. however, I woke at almost 1pm so had to scrap that plan as I had too much else to do before she came home!! But kids are allowed on Sunday mornings so I took her swimming then and made use of it, we had a great time. She is telling me a lot lately that she wants more time together - I commute and work full-time so am out of the house from 7am til 6.40pm, and she spends half the weekend with her dad (which she loves doing). As we had 2 weeks together in the school holidays, we got used to being together and having fun (we went abroad, so no housework or other responsibilities!) so I do feel for her. When I first stopped drinking and I felt so irritable, the temptation was to drink as at least I'd then be "happier" and more relaxed, and would happily let her stay up later to keep me company, therefore we'd both be happy. Not good parenting. But of course, she is used to this behaviour and trying to be stricter with her now is hard. I want to be the best mummy I can, but even without the AL, god, I want to keep her with me at all times and make her happy. Guilt guilt guilt. Working mum, single mum, alcoholic mum.

[Lavande]

Newbies Nest

Good Monday morning Nesters,

Cloudy here, oh well.
Stupot, I know we all want to fix everything immediately but that's just something we can't do. You are doing great, have faith that everything in your life will continue to improve, just remain on your AF course

I have a full day of work, exercise, animal care, cooking, you name it ahead of me. How did I ever have time to drink? :H
Wishing everyone a great AF Monday!

Lav

[Icanwithoutacan]

Newbies Nest

Stupot-
I think you sound like a great mom. A little advice? Don't try to make her happy at all costs. My parents did this and I think ts one reason I started drinking. Not blaming the parents.. Just saying that when you are used to someone smoothing the road in front of you at all times and don't have to feel real "frustration, patience, disappointment" etc. you can't deal with the real world and look for ways to escape real feelings. I also see this in my kids' friends... The ones whose parents white wash the world for them are truly at a disadvantage later... They tend to be folIowers, looking to others to show them fun and happines which often translates to sex, alcohol, internet addictions, porn addictions, and drugs in the teenage years. biy i sound judgmental and i am not meaning to nor am i an expert... I still have 5 under roof, but I am shocked by what my kids tell me their 12, 13, 14 year old friends are doing for "fun" and to be "happy" ... Good luck

[Byrdlady]

Newbies Nest

Morning, Nesters...
Welcome Dryer!! I tried to award you a prize over on the roll call but my icons are not working...
We are so pleased you've joined us!
Hope everyone has an easy day! Stay the course! Byrdie

[Dottie Belle]

Newbies Nest

Morning all,
Rainy and icky here...up early, at least for me, so I can eat a little before my CAT scan later today. Docs are still looking for a reason for the blood clots...it makes me very uneasy that they cant find a reason so I have no clue what not to do or that I will be on meds forever....sigh....
At least I am not drinking too....16 days...woohoo.
Dottie

[Mein Sonnenschein]

Newbies Nest

Hello Nest. It's afternoon here in Germany. Also rainy, dreary and COLD! I'm not quite ready for the wintertime. It seems like summer had just begun.

I just want to thank everyone in the Nest and on MWO for keeping me sane today. I've been away from the site for a few weeks, dealing with some personal issues. I'm coming back today and trying to make my life more positive. So happy that I have this place to come to.

Much love and strength to you all today.

[Stupot]

Newbies Nest

Raining here in London too. However, I have to go to Portugal next week for work. Nice hotel, food, etc, all paid for should be good, no? But no, it is team-building and schmoozing, brainstorming etc and all those other buzzwords. I have never had to do anything like this before, I have no friends in this job, and often find myself crippled by shyness and a huge lack of confidence. I don't know what to take with me (clotheswise), I have no idea what to expect of the whole thing, I don't like having to leave my daughter, and I am terrified of the ever-present AL that there apparently is at these things. The only time I've socialised with these colleagues was last Christmas when I couldn't get out of going to the Christmas party and got wasted. Nothing bad happened (for once!) but that is the only social benchmark they have of me. And without AL, I definitely cannot work a room or make chitchat. But I also definitely do not want to drink. I am sure I won't but the feeling of discomfort that I do know will accompany me throughout the whole thing makes me want to claw my own skin off. As there is a lot of discussion about this trip in the office today, I am getting very little done except allowing my mind to run away with me!

[broken halo]

Newbies Nest

Hi Nesters,

We had a bit of bad news in the family yesterday, happy to say I did not drink and was actually there for the people who needed me. So many times in the past I haven't been. Actually, looking back I was more of a liability in times of crisis when I was drinking. I never want to be that person again.

Perversely, remorse about the past actually triggered drinking thoughts. How extremely f*cked up is that? :H

Hope everyone is well

[gambler]

Newbies Nest

Day 6

Home base Home base this is Gambler 6d over ..

Gambler 6 this is Home base.. whats your status .. over....

Home base .. I have Target in sight... Confidence is high .. Repeat confidence is high .. over ..

Roger that Gambler 6 ... ... Gambler 6 we show a bogey coming in at 12 o-clock going by the call sign "Former Boss". We suggest you proceed with caution... over..

I see him Home base .. Home base Im feeling some loss in my controls...requesting any advice on how to proceed...over...

Gambler 6 .. we suggest you keep your eye on the main target after which you will proceed back to home base where you will land on runway AF 7Day .. good luck and god speed. Out.

Hello everyone and good morning I hope everything is going well for you.

As you can tell Im having a rough time right now on what to do. I have been in shelter for a week now and that has helped emensly. But I really need to deal with the realities of life. I am kinda nervous right now.

I didnt get crap for sleep last night ( Story of my life for the past week ). The sleep thing is really starting to get old. Im having a hard time putting my thoughts together for very long. I did however Eat well last night...to the point I was Full which was a first. So generally feeling good about that.

Gonna have to really stay focused today I tell ya. I kinda feel half way between Gambler and Dave if you know what I mean.

I do however feel stronger being able to talk to you guys. Cant tell you how much just knowing someone is there...thinking about me...and knowing that you all have Faith in me even when I loose faith in myself.

God bless you guys :h Best wishes to you all :l

Gam-Dave

[Icanwithoutacan]

Newbies Nest

Gambler I'm sorry you are struggling but the beginning of your post cracked me up.... I fell Friday bc I too was afraid to deal with the realities of life.... It's NOT worth it. Drinking didn't change the realities just checked me out for a bit and then the realities were still there and I felt sick guilty depressed etc on top. My brain MUCH MUCH more positive and able to retain emotional control sober even though my feelings are often hard to bear... Hang tough! I did not wake up the next day saying I'm so glad I drank

[MossRose]

Newbies Nest

Hello nesters. At work, so must make this quick. I will try to read back when I get home and make a more thoughtful post. BHalo - I totally understand. This past weekend, as I was sitting there listening to my son tell me all the ways that my drinking has harmed our family (and the list was a long one), all I could think was, wow - I could really use a drink. The intense guilt was bringing on some pretty awful cravings. I so badly wanted to fall back into old patterns. Drink and forget my shame - if only temporarily. I guess it's more common than I thought.. xx hang in there. You are doing great.

ps - I hope all is ok