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    Newbies Nest

    Been a while. Room for one more?
    You were born with wings, why prefer to crawl through life? Rumi

    :lilangel:

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      Newbies Nest

      Hey Free Fly! There is ALWAYS room for one more! So glad to see you! Settle in and get comfy!
      Lost, good to see you, and Clipped, nice to see you again!
      Regained a little ME time back this afternoon.....at Gambler's prompting, we watched the Star Trek movie this afternoon! It was great!!! Action Packed!
      Dottie, Lil B, available, Sake, BH, you all are ROCK STARS!
      SOMETIMES, you can get your posts back by right clicking and hitting 'undo'. Doesn't work every time, but when it does it's a blessing!
      Live long and prosper!!! Have a safe night in the nest! Byrdie
      All you gotta do, is get thru this day. AF 1/20/2011
      Tool Box
      Newbie's Nest

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        Newbies Nest

        Good evening Nesters,

        Great to see so many dropping by today

        Hello & welcome So Lost! Glad you found the nest, please settle in for a while.

        FreeFly, greetings to you! What's going on?

        I hope everyone takes the time to sit & read thru the Tool box, sooner rather than later. I can't emphasize enough how making a good plan for yourself is the way to succeed. You know your drinking triggers - plan ahead

        Byrdie, I remember a skit on Saturday Night Live(way back when it first began) about the 'visitors who wouldn't leave' :H :H
        I hope they all leave you the hell alone soon!

        Wishing everyone a safe night in the nest!
        Lav
        AF since 03/26/09
        NF since 05/19/09
        Success comes one day at a time :thumbs:

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          Newbies Nest

          Lavande;1559716 wrote:

          I hope everyone takes the time to sit & read thru the Tool box, sooner rather than later. I can't emphasize enough how making a good plan for yourself is the way to succeed. You know your drinking triggers - plan ahead
          Lav
          Lav is so RIGHT. After a sort of tough weekend in terms of health, I was feeling somewhat better this evening and decided to take a long soak in the tub. It occurred to me that it would be nice to have a glass of wine during this. Just one. I was not craving a drink or anything like that but it just seemed like a good, relaxing idea and I had that delusion that I'm "different" and would be able to handle it.

          Unfortunately, there is wine in my house right now that belongs to someone else. To really stick with my plan, there would be none available because I know I'm way too lazy to make a trip to the store. Then I thought about how the next step of my my plan calls for me to post on MWO what I am about to do and to call or text a MWO mentor. Well... Just thinking about doing those things killed whatever romantic thoughts I was having about AL, to say the least.

          And that is all it was - an illusion. I would be so furious and disappointed right now if I had decided to test fate and have "just one". Even if it had worked out ok, I would have really betrayed myself and my friends here. And it definitely would have been a deliberate, rational, bad choice - there was no compulsion or social pressure or any other convenient excuse at all.

          Not just in the first few days of AF living but always, we need to have a plan in place that we know so well that we can put it into action immediately -- Just like in the ER where everyone knows exactly what to do when a patient is admitted. Thoughts of drinking are an emergency for us!

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            Newbies Nest

            Byrdie & Lav - both still there and both with a kind word - very humbling. Thank you!
            Ready to come back and give it another go. The desire never leaves me even if the will is a bugger. Never say never, eh. 30 days, surely I can do that! Night all x
            You were born with wings, why prefer to crawl through life? Rumi

            :lilangel:

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              Newbies Nest

              I made it through the day without too much trouble. I know I'll be pleased in the morning. What a great way to start the work week. My goal right now is simply to get a week with no drinking. I'll try not to look too far ahead, but I think one week is doable. It doesn't sound like much but I've only managed it a handful of times in my life and I need to keep this promise to myself. I hope everyone else is doing well and are ready for a new week.
              You had the power all along, my dear.

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                Newbies Nest

                well,I just typed out a long post and it deleted. That was discouraging because I am at 79 days and really feeling discouraged with the whole thing. I know the habit is broken, but I don't feel like I don't ever want to not drink. Like when I quit smoking and knew that there was no way I could ever pick up a cigarette again. I knew I was strongly addicted to nicotine. I'd write more, but don't want to put my thoughts down like I just did...pored my heart out....only for it to disappear I know I will hang tight until 90 days, but I am still trying to figure out what to do... Like is this where AA comes in with the steps and all? Would that help? Cause I just am not feeling it. I don't miss the anxiety or obsessive thoughts though...the constant hiding, lying, and intense desire to stop. Well, I hope all have a good night.

                Piper

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                  Newbies Nest

                  Hey Piper
                  I've had that happen more than once and I never have been able to retype it all back again, I'm one of those 2 finger typers.

                  Wish I could give you some sage advice. Only thing I know is that I enjoy being sober. I mean I actually enjoy it. I'd be lying if I told you I don't get the urge every once in awhile, but it is more like "oh, that's what it use to be like, don't need that now". I've gotten a hell of a lot of things done. I kinda use this site as my AA.

                  hope you're doing well
                  Sam
                  Liberated 5/11/2013

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                    Newbies Nest

                    Sam, I agree, I like being AF. Piper don't overthink it, just keep doing what you're doing. I'm reading "Alcohol Lied to Me" it's really an eye opener. The more I read, the more I learn, the more I love being AF. It's not about will power any more, it's about choice.
                    Newbies Nest
                    Toolbox
                    My accountability thread

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                      Newbies Nest

                      hello there 3June,
                      how's you been? Have to check out Alcohol Lied to me. I need to read, read, read. Helps me too.
                      Liberated 5/11/2013

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                        Newbies Nest

                        Good job kailey .... Monday will be so nice ....
                        Glad you got some peace Byrdie
                        Welcome so lost clipped and piper and back free fly
                        No sugar great advice and agree with Lav so I'm heading to tool box
                        My sister worked in production on Star Trek so glad to hear it's a success
                        Hi to Dottie Dave Kradle and anyone lurking
                        I hung in there by the skin of my teeth today
                        Tomorrow will be good though!

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                          Newbies Nest

                          just a very quick hello on my way to work-- will catch up with you all this evening!!

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                            Newbies Nest

                            piper123;1559760 wrote: well,I just typed out a long post and it deleted. That was discouraging because I am at 79 days and really feeling discouraged with the whole thing. I know the habit is broken, but I don't feel like I don't ever want to not drink. Like when I quit smoking and knew that there was no way I could ever pick up a cigarette again. I knew I was strongly addicted to nicotine. I'd write more, but don't want to put my thoughts down like I just did...pored my heart out....only for it to disappear I know I will hang tight until 90 days, but I am still trying to figure out what to do... Like is this where AA comes in with the steps and all? Would that help? Cause I just am not feeling it. I don't miss the anxiety or obsessive thoughts though...the constant hiding, lying, and intense desire to stop. Well, I hope all have a good night.

                            Piper

                            Hi Piper123...we are are almost kissing cousins !

                            Last week I wrote a huge heart felt post and lost it all in one fell swoop... I swear I thought, 'that's it! screw this!!! See? Even my best thoughts get blown up...:upset: "
                            The next day, I just thought , " well, that wasnt so heavy and i wrote a small post which captured the essence of my lost post...they say, 'Brevity is the Soul of Wit' and in my 51 short years here, I think this is so...

                            79 days is huge for us...and tiny to the folks who are not like
                            us...does that make sense? I've been here since 2007 and seriously working it all since 2012... That math doesn't add up in the non drinking world but in OUR world, it's crystal clear...:h
                            You are exactly where you should be at this stage..maybe even a little ahead. :goodjob:

                            Also, your comment about smoking ...I've said in several past posts that if I could have reached the magic turn off with AL that I did with smokes...well, all would have been much better for the past 15 years....and I loved to smoke!
                            Now, i couldn't imagine lightning up..truly...

                            Please stay close. Wish I could add more but am incredibly tired and my daughter has fallen asleep on my arm! ,...
                            Sleep well Ms 123 and know that we are all with you.
                            :h
                            On My Own Way Out Since May 20, 2012
                            *If you think poorly of yourself, you can fail with a clear conscience.
                            https://www.mywayout.org/community/f11/tool-box-27556.html tool box
                            https://www.mywayout.org/community/f19/newbies-nest-30074.html newbie nest

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                              Newbies Nest

                              Piper i have the same thoughts too. I think i have done 23 days, god its not that hard to give up, why not just have a drink. Whats the point of it all?

                              Thinking about it, the point is - i know i feel so much better, i know i look better, i know i enjoy waking up AF, i know i enjoy not shaking, i know i love remembering what i have done the night before. So many things i know i feel but is it that our memories fade of how bad when drinking AL we feel the next day, could it have been that bad, did i really drink too much constantly? Wouldn't it be okay as i can control it now since i have done so many days? My answer is f**k no, if i have that one drink or bottle i know that eventually i will get back to where i was, back in that hole, back where i really dont want to be.

                              But i totally relate to your feelings and that is why i am here to get stronger to never have AL again. That is my wish as hard as it is to contemplate.

                              Saying that tonight i could go a wine or 100, stress at work and my immediate thought was "god i so want a drink" so i am having a coffee and bitching on here.
                              AF free 1st December 2013 - 1st December 2022 - 9 years of freedom

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                                Newbies Nest

                                Morning, Nesters!
                                Ready to hit the ground running!
                                I was sitting on the couch last night, (without speaking....and LOVING IT) and I was checking my phone email. I'd saw that one had come in earlier in the afternoon from my high school best friend. She and her hubs are in town and wanted to go to dinner! By this time it was nearly 9, so I wrote her back saying I was sorry I didn't see her note....and we are having dinner tonight. You all are so right, this would have made a wonder sit-com episode!! The never ending visitors!! Just when I wanted to b*tch and complain to hubs that it was HIS family doing it, then MY side showed up~!! Bahahahah!!!

                                NoSugar, it IS amazing at the power of those thoughts sometimes, they just come out of the blue and seem so harmless.. Yet they can take us down in an instant. I'm not sure what's worse, when you have a massive fall or if, like you say, you take a drink....and think you've gotten away with it, and then continue until you have a massive fall. Either way....I don't know ONE SINGLE person here who has ever taken a drink after a period of sobriety and was glad he/she did. Everyone REGRETS it. I'm so glad you did what YOU know to do and that's come here first!! Just talking thru it helps!!

                                Piper....I went thru several phases of just being FLAT. I mean it was like I was in No Man's Land. I didn't belong to the drinkers and I didn't belong to the sober people. I was just In Between. I knew I was better off, but where I was wasn't the greatest either. However, if you plotted your progress on a graph, starting, say 90 days ago, and looked at where you are today, I bet you'd see STEADY UPWARD PROGRESS! When you are living it day to day, it can sure get old....but when you step back and look, it is amazing. There are folks here that would kill for your string of days!!! Sometimes, you just have to Fake it Til you Make it!!! I can assure you, that the day will come when you have NO thoughts about AL at all! No pull. No longing. No desire. It is a wonderful place! Hang in there, it takes TIME to happen. Give time, time!! Keep checking in and keep reaching out to others, this will help you grow and be stronger!

                                Hope everyone has a wonderful week! Remember, always call ahead when you are going to visit someone! Bahahah! Byrdie
                                All you gotta do, is get thru this day. AF 1/20/2011
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