Newbies Nest

[broken halo]

Newbies Nest

Afternoon nesters

Londoner, what a difference a week makes, eh?

Musomatt, nice to see you in the nest, your post says you have put a lot of thought into quitting, we are with you.

Jennie, look after yourself, love that you have already thought about how to deal with those 5pm thoughts!

Hi LS, good job on reaching out before those two glasses become more!

[Lavande]

Newbies Nest

Good morning Nesters

Just wanted to wish everyone a happy, productive AF Tuesday!
Doesn't matter if it's day 1 or 2 or 2000 - focus on not drinking today, everything else will be OK

Lav

[I'm Strong and in Control]

Newbies Nest

Rahulthesweet;1571956 wrote: Hello Nesters,

So my struggle begins. Day started off when my son was asking my mom "why do you cry when my father comes to kiss you."

He is too young to understand alcoholism. He is too young to understand that I am a low life liar and a cheat. And worst these are the memories of childhood I am giving to my children.

I will quit ... No one believe me .. I have said it earlier ... I can should shout about it but why should anyone believe me. Do I believe in myself ?

How has this poison made me feel so miserable. How did I allow myself to be consumed by it.

The day 1 begins and I will remain sober I know. But it will be sad regretful day. The day I wish end soon ...not coz I will miss AL. But so many regrets I have the at they are hard to see...

Rahul - it can be a sad, regretful day or the most wonderful day of your life. Your choice.

[I'm Strong and in Control]

Newbies Nest

jenniech;1571812 wrote: i know what is wrong with me. I know what I have to do.
Being highly functional does not make it any better. It just makes it harder to stop. I need to be done with this. I know. I know it isn't worth it. I know I will be happier without. I know all this. And yet, and yet....CRAP
They say an alcoholic needs to hit bottom before they can change but I disagree!!! I have not lost my job, my family, etc. I still go to work. But I am not happy nor do I feel healthy and yet still there is that pull
By posting this, I am hoping that this will make me see how stupid I am being. What a WASTE
Jenniech - I didn't "hit bottom". I reached the point when I knew it was more painful than enjoyable. I went to work everyday, took fantastic vacations, threw great parties, am a loving, considerate person, etc. It is OVER. Drinking makes me miserable and I spend too much thing thinking and worrying about it. I'm not drinking today.

free at last;1571815 wrote: Hi Jenniech,
I don't usually post in the Newbies' Nest because I find it hard to keep up with everyone. But, I saw that you had posted and wanted to respond.

You have gone six months AF so I know you have enormous will power. If fact, you were extremely encouraging to me much of the spring and early summer when I would rack up several weeks and then blow it due to a family or work obligation that just seemed too much for me. I guess the question is what do you want more? The feeling of being in control (if I recall, it seemed to start for you sometime around 4 months AF) or how you feel tonight when you post that you want out of this vicious cycle.

You know the drill because you encouraged me when I was faltering. Read, post, and post some more. You are back, you know what you want, and what you have to do. We are here to encourage you.
Free, I've said it before. You are my idol. You are the beacon that I want to follow. I'm like a stalker hunting down your threads. Thank you.

C-Developer;1571909 wrote: love, or the abundant lack.

You ARE loved, C-D. What is it that is lacking?

LostSoul33;1571993 wrote: HI all,
I am back -- as I mentioned on another post and to my soul sister, NoSugar, I fell off the wagon last week. Although I havent gotten drunk, I have been drinking 2 glasses of wine everyday after a stressful day at a new job. I know this is only going to lead to a downward spiral so I am here, reaching out, becoming accountable, yet again, to kick this once and for all. I dont like the way I feel the next day, even after one glass. I am lethargic and just not on my a-game. I know AL DOES NOT work for me. I am so much better without it. I was AL free yesterday and felt great but the minute I got back to the office and feel the chaos of negative, mean people, I succumb to believing 'a drink' will help. Does it make me unwind and escape my problems, yes, for the time being. But, like I said, it certainly doesnt help. I still wake up with the same issues and have less of the power to face them. Ultimately, I am destroying my chances of being my joyful self I discovered while being AL free for the last 3+ months. Gosh, I was doing so well, I actually stopped checking in here and stopped counting. Guess I am another stat, back again, starting from the beginning; however, I am still very proud of the accomplishments I have made, and know I can get there again. One day at a time, right guys? Thanks for listening.

Lost Soul - Byrdie pointed out to me that when I 'drink at a problem' the only one that I'm hurting is myself - I feel miserable and the problem is still there. Tonight try a bubble bath and a cup of tea. You'll never wake up in the morning wishing that you drank last night. I learned all this stuff right here!!!

Londoner;1572000 wrote: Morning guys.

Just checking in. Midweek is not my usual time to relapse, and I haven't. But want to keep checking in to help progress.

Really come on a long way since my last binge 10 days ago. I am productive during the day, my workouts are back at full steam, my mood is far better and I am eating well.

It's funny how a once weekly binge can wreck you for a week and effectively you are functioning at about 50% of optimal. I wonder how many social drinkers are like this?

Anyway, hope everyone is well.

Londoner - I was a 'social drinker' at one point, before I became a daily drinker. My 50% (and even 25% an .5%!) were enough to get by on most days. Sad thought for our economy and my career. I'd like to know what 100% would look like. I'm still taking baby steps, but I've had a fantasy called "what would my life be like if I didn't drink for a year".

Everyone - I've not been spending much time in the nest - RED FLAG. I'm doing well, and beginning to feel the restlessness? boredom? discomfort? of a normal, everyday life. I think this feeling is what I try to avoid by drinking. (One of the many facets of my disease). I'm not drinking today. I will be in the nest tonight. Wishing you all a JOYFUL recovery. Be happy that you are sober or wanting to be sober - it is a good thing!

[Starfish1]

Newbies Nest

Good Morning Nesters!

Its so good to see some of our old friends hopping back into the nest. I have been away myself, and am celebrating day 5 today :yay:
The key for me keeping my sobriety is being accountable here. There seems to be no other way for me and so I am so happy to see Jennie and Lost Soul and Raul getting back to posting and being accountable. You will now get the feedback and support you need from all your friends at MWO. I am as excited for you as I am for myself!
Just a little encouragement for everyone on day 1 or 2 is that (as I mentioned) I am on day 5 and already feel much happier and more positive. The time is flying by and I am anxiously awaiting my moon and my 30 day hat.
I have back to back meetings for the next 2 days, at work, so will try to pop in as I can.
Stay Strong everyone- we can do this!

:hStar

[Byrdlady]

Newbies Nest

Good Morning, Nesters!!
So good to see the new (MM) and returning faces! This is THE place to be if you are serious about getting AL out of your life!
Looks as if all of us know WHAT to do, it's just keeping it going that takes the motivation. I guess that's what keeps me here in the nest... I never want to lose sight of where one drink will put me. I do see folks wander off thinking they have a grip on this, but there is a harsh reality out there in the world. We are bombarded with tv advertisements and friends and family flaunting it in front of us constantly. In one 30 minute show last night, there were ads for 4 AL beverages. So in the course of an evening, that's 32 ads on tv glamorizing AL. Then there's the chatter all day from coworkers....if you live with a drinker, there's that constant reminder, too. So there really IS no escape from being bombarded. As NoSugar said, it's the lifeline you maintain here that keeps it all in perspective....when you let go of the rope, the other stuff starts to get your attention...pretty soon you think 'Heck, if I can STOP drinking for ____ (longer than 10 minutes) then what was all the fuss about??' You start to believe the world around you. That is why I stay here, and I see firsthand what ONE GLASS will do. Support is the key!! 32 ads in one night of tv, and they are really GOOD ads, too! That's 224 seductive ads per week going into our subconscious... That's 11,648 commercials a year showing us WHY WE should be drinking. If that doesn't warrant a support group, I don't know what does. Stick to this site like glue!!! That's what others who are successful do, and I just follow their lead. So far, so good!
Have a wonderful Tuesday!!! Byrdie

[MinStar]

Newbies Nest

Hello hello nesters!
I hope all of you are well. Sorry for lack of posting. Seems life is running away with me at the moment, I worked all weekend and had a wedding to attend on sunday. This meant a late Sunday night home and then back to work week. Al still kicking my head. Temptations to drink are ever their when I haven't eaten and am back from work. Need to get tea on and feed my little girl. This far have resisted. I know what one drink will do- every time I get the urge I think forward to how I will be the next day and how this will become a hidden secret etc. I need to keep strong.
Thanks to all for posting. I will go back tonight at some point and read. Even though I am not posting a lot I need your posts people :-))))))

Off to work I go- wheeeeeeeeeeee. Bye-

[Rahulthesweet]

Newbies Nest

Hello Nesters

Day one going good. Sober. Eat in evenings ... no cravings only guilt !

Have a nice sober day !!

[lifechange]

Newbies Nest

Hello Lovely Nesters!

Just got off work and I am BEAT! but happy.

I'mstrong, I can't remember your exact history and how many days you have now? I remember exactly how you said you feel, with the becoming bored and a bit restless. I think it's so important to just hang in there with everything you have for the first 30 days. Like Byrdie says, it's the maintaining part that's work-- but it does get easier and the mind chatter becomes quieter, getting used to the "boring" everyday life becomes habit and the joys become more evident. We have to give ourselves a real chance and that means fighting for our freedom!!

Star, you sound great! and Minstar, good to see you.
Londoner, 10 days is awesome-- happy to see you back on track and feeling good--
Lostsoul and Jennie, welcome back! It's good to have you both back on this journey with us!

wishing everyone a safe day/evening! xo

[HopingCarnations]

Newbies Nest

My boyfriend unexpectedly went to work a little while ago and that's when it gets very difficult for me. That selfish voice started talking to me, so I'm spending some time here, until it shuts up. I like to read these posts because finally I feel like I'm not struggling alone, and people are out there who go through the same, who want to help.

[Dottie Belle]

Newbies Nest

Morning all,
Day 52 and it is getting better and I am not thinking about "happy hour" every day. Some days I am busy and other days I just find something to distract myself...so for those of u on day 2 or so it is not always easy but doable with a little or a lot of effort and determination and of course reading like cray here and posting whenever needed.
We are here to support you and want u to succeed!!!

Laundry is on my to do list today such fun....but someone needs to do it and dh would turn his undies inside out and wear for another 7 days.....;-))

Dottie

[lifechange]

Newbies Nest

Hi Dottie, my 52 day friend--

And HopingCarnations, stick with us, you hear?:l I always wanted my boyfriend to be gone so that I could drink-- it was the most dangerous time for me. I think the best thing possible is to stay here and read, read , read and post, post, post! You've been to the toolbox, right? And check out some of the threads in General, if you haven't and read Doggygirls thread in the MyStory section! That one takes some time and is inspiring-- so many of the stories here are inspiring. Do you have some nice tea? A spicy cinnamon or ginger tea is good.
We're all here to support you so hang tight!

[Starfish1]

Newbies Nest

Hi Hoping!!! What L.C. said! Yes, having the opportunity to sneak a drink is a huge trigger for me- and one I must work hard to plan around. Give me a split second to sneak a drink and I'm all on it...well, I used to be anyhow. Fly straight to the nest or occupy yourself in any other way than drinking....just put those thoughts right out of your head. As K9 says, you will never wake up tomorrow, wishing you drank yesterday. Fast forward your thoughts to the consequences of taking that drink and you will see that its not worth it. As Byrdie says- Use the silver bullet to ward off cravings and eat something! Eat so much that you can't even think about the drink! You can do it, Hoping!

[Daily wine]

Newbies Nest

Good afternoon Nesters DAY 10 for me yeah!! I see a couple others are right there with me. Its amazing how much better you can feel and love life with out AL. I am grateful for this site and very blessed to have found a wonderful AA meeting (actually several) If I can do this after 30 years everyone can do it. Enjoy the day!
DW

[NoSugar]

Newbies Nest

LostSoul33;1571993 wrote: I know this is only going to lead to a downward spiral so I am here, reaching out, becoming accountable, yet again, to kick this once and for all. I dont like the way I feel the next day, even after one glass. I am lethargic and just not on my a-game. I know AL DOES NOT work for me. I am so much better without it....Ultimately, I am destroying my chances of being my joyful self I discovered while being AL free for the last 3+ months. Gosh, I was doing so well, I actually stopped checking in here and stopped counting.... I am still very proud of the accomplishments I have made, and know I can get there again. One day at a time, right guys? Thanks for listening.

It is great to see you in the nest, LostSoul! This is the place to be to get this done .

As I commented to you many times, you got past this addiction with less angst and more joy than anyone I've ever seen here - not only since I joined but in threads from the past that occupied me in the early days of quitting.

I was concerned when you (and others) posted less (or left) but I thought that maybe those of us who insist that staying connected and posting often are critical elements in recovery were overstating the situation and inappropriately generalizing our needs. Maybe not everyone needs ongoing support.

I am of course sorry that AL caught up with you and that you needed to come back but I am so glad you are willing to give MWO another shot and that you returned before it became a drinking nightmare.

Your return, and Star's (Hi, Star! It is so great to have you back with all your contagious enthusiasm :l) and Jennie's (I am looking forward to hanging out with you again!) give me confidence that what I and so many others have written so often I worry that the words lose their meaning, is indeed correct: To get and stay free of such a strong addiction, we need ongoing interaction with people who have had a similar experience.

There is no way the very unsexy 'don't drink' message can compete with all of the pro-drinking influences, many of which are carefully designed to be almost irresistible, that bombard us every day unless we put ourselves in a position to hear it often from people we can relate to and who we know have our true best interests at heart.

:h NS