Newbies Nest

[MinStar]

Newbies Nest

MAE nesters. Hope you're all well. Haven't read through posts. Later this evening I will catch up.

X

[Samstone]

Newbies Nest

3June
well done on your 5 months!!

[Myluck]

Newbies Nest

June you are my inspiration!!!

[Byrdlady]

Newbies Nest

Good Morning, Nesters!
Great to see everyone!! Hope everyone got his/her clocks adjusted! This will be a day of discombobulation, but NOT from AL!

3J! So great to see you!!! I spotted you as a winner the very first time you posted! You dug in and read everything you could about this affliction! You quit and NEVER looked back. You are one of the ones I spoke of the other day that 'get it' and keep it going! Congratulations on your 5 months! This must be a record!!

:record:

Thank you for everything you do around these boards! This is a better place because of you!! Enjoy your big day and your newfound freedom! We are so proud of you!

ICAN, waiting for you to check in...I'm warming up my butt! (yikes!) XXOO, Byrdie

[I'm Strong and in Control]

Newbies Nest

[QUOTE=Rahulthesweet;1578989]When ever I touch drink I feel guilty as crazy. Even today I could not stay sober. QUOTE]

Obviously you are not feeling guilty enough to put the drink down! When the pain gets too great, you'll stop. Why not stop NOW and avoid the pain? Being AF is not at all easy - but no one is pouring drink down your throat, except you. You are the only one that can stop.

[I'm Strong and in Control]

Newbies Nest

Londoner - how you doing? I know you are out there lurking . . . grab a branch and hang out, ok?

[Pavati]

Newbies Nest

Good morning, everyone.

After lurking for quite some time, I am jumping in to the nest this morning.

I have read back on many threads and am inspired by your support of each other and I look forward to hanging out here.

My story sounds familiar. I am in my 40s, have two kids, a great job, great friends and family, and I drink too much. Because of all of the good things in my life, it has been easy to justify my continuing drinking as "not too bad," but we all know the lie contained in that statement.

I am afraid right now of two things - one is getting through the holidays without AL. I am not a huge fan of the dark days of winter, and tend to get depressed or sad anyway. I know that AL contributes to the bad feelings, so that is reason to stay away from it this winter, but with all of the family and friend events it will be challenging to stay strong. But as a friend pointed out, there no perfect time to quit - there is always a party, a trip, a holiday, etc., so I am jumping in.

I have a second fear and that is typing my truth on an Internet forum. Does anyone else have concerns about privacy?

Anyway - thanks for listening. I look forward to getting to know you all better than I already think I do from all of my reading.

[bougainvillea]

Newbies Nest

Back in the nest

Hi again! You guys have been busy posting while I've been busy drinking. Actually, I only drank once, but once was enough. Like so many of you that have tried moderation, I have also tried 1000 times. I have finally had a wake up call that came in the form of a huge bump on my head from a fall I don't remember on Friday night. I swore I would only have 2, but by the end of two, how much I was drinking was no longer a concern. You all know how that story ends. So, I'm done this time. Done done. I literally woke up in jeans soaking wet from my own urine, head aching from a hangover and a bruised head, and I don't even know how I got home. I'd love to act like this was a first, but of course, it's just one version of god-awful that I have reenacted so many times. I have read all of what you have posted since my last post one week ago, and I now see the logic of staying close to the nest. I am addicted to alcohol and I am committed to stopping for good. I have practiced all day (in my mind) telling people I don't drink anymore. So now I am going to say it here. I don't drink anymore. I have no control over my drinking, never have, never will. So I'm done. November 1st was my last day of drinking.

[Londoner]

Newbies Nest

I give up, what is wrong with me?!

Feel useless and lonely

[I'm Strong and in Control]

Newbies Nest

Pavati;1579661 wrote:
I have a second fear and that is typing my truth on an Internet forum. Does anyone else have concerns about privacy?

Welcome Pavati!
When I first found this site, about 3 years ago, I set up a bogus email account and attempted to be vague with personal detail, fearing that I'd be "outed". Over time, I realized, anyone on the Boards that recognises me is here for the same problem. I looked to Karma, fate, good intentions thay my peers, family, workplace, friends ~ any person that could harm me learning my identity ~ I've never been thay cruel to anyone (since kindergarten!) and don't think it will happen. I now get notifications on my real email as I don' . want to miss anything and want to close off any quick retreat onto the abyss.

Anyone around me long enoigh MUST know my drinking WAS a problem so I wasn't fooling anyone. None of us have been able thus far to talk about it. As "the inner circle" expands, anf I build more self respect and confidence, I'm less concerned about being found out. Today I am not the drunk I was so ashamed of.

Agsin, glad u are here. I hate dinky smartphone keypads.

[bougainvillea]

Newbies Nest

Holidays...

Pavati, I share your concerns about the holidays. Always have. I am curious what suggestions others have on getting through that tough time of the year for those battling it out with AL. I was reflecting on when I was pregnant with my daughter and how easy (relatively) it was for me to say no to a drink. I still went to parties and enjoyed myself, something I have such a hard time imagining now! I keep thinking about something that one member posted, that for us not drinking is something to celebrate, not mourn. Like having a baby. By not drinking we are fostering a new life...but this time it's our own. Hope you have a wonderful day.

[I'm Strong and in Control]

Newbies Nest

Londoner;1579675 wrote: I give up, what is wrong with me?!

Feel useless and lonely

Missed you, mate. Grab a cuppa and start talking or posting. I meed to take hubby to airport in a bit, and I'll be lonely with you.

Weekends are rough.

[Queenbug]

Newbies Nest

Londoner....come back and chat to us....we know how this feels...let us see if we can help :h

Parvati ....I have hovered here for many a year....finally got brave enough to post on 'my story'....and this when I had bolted a few months before because I was scared about privacy....just to say...it was a relief to write that...warts and all : )))....I was feeling especially wobbly and wretched...and received such support it still makes me feel stronger.

Don't worry....we are all in this together x :welcome:

[DreamThinkDo]

Newbies Nest

Day 21 done&dusted

MAE all
No electricity today, as the municipality did some maintenance. Made coffee, since I have a gas stove, but the internetwebbything doesn't run on gas, so I couldn't let anybody know about the coffee. Sorry!

Had a funny day yesterday. Visited Friend A I mentioned yesterday, and he kept asking me if I wanted some wine. The words "No thanks, I'm fine" didn't seem to register. He called me later invited me to to an open-mic night at one of the restaurants in town. I didn't want to go, and told him it was because of his behaviour earlier, and made it clear that I was not going to accept that. I joined him and his friends - a really nice couple - and the same thing happened again. I stayed for about an hour, chatted to everybody I knew, was as loud as always on my water-and-slice-of-lemon and left. Friend B was also there last night, and he was so supportive: saying how difficult it must be not to drink in a culture/environment where practically everybody drinks.

In a way, I understand Friend A's position: there are very few single people of our age in the village, and we've become friends of a sort. But: if he keeps on behaving like this, he going to be minus a friend. His decision. He's just called, and I told him off - again. He said that he's getting the message. We'll see.

Sorry about this rant, but I just had to get it off my chest.

Best part of yesterday: I was with people who all had something to drink, and I really and truly did not feel as if I was missing out on anything. That was a good feeling to have.

[MossRose]

Newbies Nest

Just wanted to pop in and say hello. Another quiet day for me, which can be good or bad. Today, it feels okay, but think I'll hang close just to be safe. I see there is a lot going on in the nest.

3J - Congrats on 5 months. You inspire me. Always have.

Londoner - please come back and talk with us. Nothing is wrong with you. You are just fighting a vicious enemy. We've all been there. Check in and let us know how you are doing.

Pavati - Welcome and glad you have joined us. I was almost paralyzed by my fear of being "outed" when I first joined MWO. There are some very wise people here who talked me through it. After several months, I can truthfully say that I just don't care anymore. As Strong says, anyone lurking on these boards has an AL issue themselves. While, I doubt I would go out of my way to tell coworkers or casual acquaintances about my alcoholism, I no longer worry about someone recognizing me out here. I had a problem with AL, and I'm fixing it. I would be more ashamed if I had done nothing. But, I do remember how I felt when I first joined. So take it at your own pace, and post what makes you comfortable. Glad you are here.

Sixtyfour - glad you found the nest. Lots of wonderful support here.

Dream - wow, I'm inspired by your strength. When I read this, "he was so supportive: saying how difficult it must be not to drink in a culture/environment where practically everybody drinks." I had to smile. I've read this same sentiment recently about Australia, New Zealand, the UK, and the US. Guess what I'm trying to say is - I'm not sure there is any place on earth anymore that drinking isn't considered the norm. Scary, eh?

bougainvillea - welcome and glad you are here.