Newbies Nest

[Honeysoup]

Newbies Nest

Good morning nesters – I feel SO much better today. All day yesterday I was down in the dumps, felt hard to breath like someone was sitting on my chest. Face was red and blotchy and felt sick to my stomach most of the day. Word to the wise….Don’t ever think you can drink after taking Antabuse. I feel that I have learned my lesson. It just not worth it to give in and drink! There is nothing special about it. I used to think wine made me feel, sexy, confident, in control, fun and fancy free but in reality it is the complete opposite. I look like a slob, I was far from confident because I was hiding from my true self, I had to control and looked like a complete dumbass. It makes me feel insecure and run down, worthless, and not good enough to enjoy life. That is not me!!! So many people have told me that I am a completely different person when I drink. I thought that meant it made me better more fun but that is not at all what it made me. I really want this disease out of my body I don’t want to feel helpless, ashamed, guilty, sad, fat, ugly, stupid…I want to feel loved and appreciated and for my family to be proud of me. I want to be proud of me…I have to prove it to myself that I don’t need alcohol in my life to feel happy!

Nanette – CONGRATS on a year and two days sober! High five and big hugs to you!!!
K9 – Thank you for your concern…I realize how dumb it was and how disgusting it made me feel. I wish I could get it through my head how serious it could be to drink while taking antabuse. I took it Friday night and not Saturday…then Sunday afternoon I bought the big bottle of wine. Drank almost all of it. My husband and kids saw me and was asking me if I was ok because my face and chest was so bright red. I said Yeah, sure, I’m fine and avoided the mirrors…I guess because I didn’t want to face the facts. Then I ate dinner and shortly after I lost my dinner…sorry for the vivid details…finally woke up the next morning with pounding headache along with the horrible mental feelings.

To all the others thank you for your concern as well – I need help and support to get me through this. I need this to stay alive and live a happy life…sigh…I hope that is possible.

[Byrdlady]

Newbies Nest

First things first...Nanette! Congrats on your one year anniversary!! This entitles you to the very coveted Big Girl Panties Award!!

:grannypants:

Great job! And believe it or not, it gets better still! Thanks for checking in with us!

Londoner, I hate AL, too....for what it has done to me and all my friends here. A good healthy hate will carry you far in this fight. Don't ever give in to it again, and you will be the victor over it. I'm glad you are here.

Break it on down, everyone....one day at a time, one set of 15 minutes at a time...All you gotta do, is get thru this day.....I know we can do that!
Byrdie

[Dottie Belle]

Newbies Nest

Afternoon all,
Voted this morning then out to lunch. Have a meeting at the hospital on the train layout set up for Christmas..we man the layout and hand out candy to the little ones...or big ones. Meeting at church tonight...I would never have been able to do all this if not AF...amazing...

[halo]

Newbies Nest

Londoner;1581073 wrote: I hate alcohol.

The way it makes you think you are being social.

But in fact it actually makes us more and more lonely.

Touche, alcohol is a depressant. I have decided to replace AL in my life with hugs! Everytime I feel like a drink I am going to give someone a hug instead! :l:l:l

[halo]

Newbies Nest

Honey soup, perhaps this last incident is going to be the one that is going to turn it all around for you. Wishing you the best

[NoSugar]

Newbies Nest

halo;1581174 wrote: Touche, alcohol is a depressant. I have decided to replace AL in my life with hugs! Everytime I feel like a drink I am going to give someone a hug instead! :l:l:l

Depending on how quickly you recover, this could be fun and interesting :H!
It is great to have you back, Halo. We missed you! :h NS

[K9Lover]

Newbies Nest

Hi Nesties! Welcome to the newbies...glad you've joined us. Don't stray, this is a great place to learn and grow. We can help you get through the rough patches.

Honey - Your experience reminds me of my own horrible brush with the AB/AL combo. My eyes got blood red too and everything was blurry. Did you even get a buzz from the wine? I never did, the AB blocks it from going into your liver, it goes right to your bloodstream which poisons you...which explains the feeling of DEATH. I had an "exorcist" moment where my head was spinning while I was projectile vomiting (okay...sorry for the graphics, but it's TRUE). And the headache that comes after is indescribable. Well, now you know...so don't do it that again ok? Do you still plan on taking AB? I really hope you do, it works if you respect it :l What can you do BEFORE you drink next time to curb the craving? Can you get outside for a walk, or take a bath, or go browse the makeup aisle at Walmart? ANYTHING to pass the time and get through the craving. Stay close Honey...and use my number if you need me :l

[My New Beginning]

Newbies Nest

Good to be here again. Need some strength today.

[NoSugar]

Newbies Nest

Welcome back, My New Beginning

It looks like you've been away for a year. Is today day 1?

I'm sending strength your way and hoping to get to know you better! :h NS

[Byrdlady]

Newbies Nest

Me, too! Welcome Back, Beginning! Settle in and make yourself at home! We're glad you're here!
Stressful day at work, I am so glad that I am not in the cycle of drinking things away.....ALL of my problems would still be there tomorrow on top of the guilt, shame and remorse! I will go take a nice bath and wash this day away...that will do wonders. Do whatever it takes to stay sober today! You can do it!
Hope to see everyone checking in thruout the evening! Hugs to all, Byrdie

[K9Lover]

Newbies Nest

Welcome back MNB! How are you doing? Let us know what's going on so we can help you!

[gambler]

Newbies Nest

Good evening fellow Nesters

Icanwithoutacan;1580940 wrote: Dave what can I say? I think I'll sleep soundly just knowing you are safe! I will pray for a good conclusion to your situation. I heard once that the opposite of love is not hate, it's indifference/not caring at all... I guess that describes your feeling.... Good luck
Its so good to see you again Ican. Yea thats pretty much how I feel .. about the same indifference feeling I have about AL comes in a close second lol. Dont worry Im not going to go off and sulk by myself anymore. You all are the closest thing I have to a family.

Luckyflower;1580961 wrote: Dave, being new here I only read little of your posts but I love the way you write. You should be a writer. I am sorry for your big D issues but I have a good feeling you will overcome them. Like you said things that are out of our control.
Hi Luckyflower thanks for the compliment. I sometimes get some good juices flowing through my fingers that makes it easier for me write as I think. It also helps that Im somewhat of a fast typist .. which makes for a more direct type to screen emotions. I also appreciate very much the putting out of some good vibes for roping in my situation.

You do control your own thoughts. I love hearing these types of posts ! You are so right on Lucky..

sixtyfour;1580997 wrote: I'm here, somehow. Really good to read through the posts, good to see the days ticking by for everyone. I've not yet figured how to comment on individual posts, I do apologise.
Howdies 64. If you look at the bottom right of the post there is a Reply button. Press that and bingo it will start a post window with a Quote of the members post. Now right next to the Reply button is a quote looking button. Press that button on each Post that you want to quote in your post...when your done "Flagging" each post .. hit the reply button and it will bring up all the posts that you marked into your reply post. If you do multiple quotes just make sure you start your reply to each one after the "

" .. Hope this helps.

Good day on day 3 ! Hang on there K .. its going to be a wild ride. But its so worth it.

available;1581092 wrote: Hi all just a check in to say 5 days till wedding and who's counting, oh that would be me! How many zits can one break out in just before a wedding? A lot.

So does that mean that your not going to be Available anymore .

Im almost thinking that she is acting the way she is out of guilt..and remorse. How can someone do these things and feel even remotely OK about themselves. Basically covering her Own strong feelings about herself with stronger feelings directed at me. Hey I know I drank more than I should have but I wasn't even remotely to the point of being abusive to her or the children. I spent more time defending myself while drinking. So yes it is somewhat confusing for it to escalate to the point it has. There is a reason though and it has nothing or very little to do with my beer.. I just dont know about it yet. .. Yet..

Wine-no!;1581115 wrote: Dave, so good to see you back. I am sorry that your wife is throwing those claims at you. You are a good Dad - a fantastic one actually - just you remember that. You may have made bad decisions with alcohol in the past but you are sober now... And that is what matters. The courts are used to people exaggerating matters to throw mud at the other parent - you have as much right to see those kids as she does. I'm wishing you all the best and strength at this difficult time xx

Thank you thank you! That made me feel better and couple it with the New attorney I spoke with today and you have a brighter Dave on your hands .

So I feel mucho better today my friends. Yup I spoke with another lawyer this afternoon who actually gave me information about the situation on a legal level. He told me what I need to do and how hes going to do it. Time to get this ball rolling downhill for me. Think about it... The day after I started posting on here things start to look up again. Do you think it has anything to do with how much "prayer" ( If you like to call it that ) you all have given to my situation? I personally believe so. :l

We did a Bunch of shrink wrapping again today so feeling a little ridden hard and put away wet. I know it sounds strange but Im so looking forward to jumping into a grinding suit and making some fiberglass dust fly! Fiberglass repair is my main forte' so all this swinging a torch around is getting old. I will fill my photobucket account up with some cool work I have done for any of you that are interested in the kind of skill I can put down. Yes I sound cocky about it .. but Im pretty damn good at what I do .

Only one bad thing happened to me on this fine day .. I forgot to take something out of the freezer to whip up for supper. One thing I have found now that Im cooking again is that I really dont like to eat out anymore lol. I didnt eat out much before..but Ive never eaten out since my quitting day aside from a quicky 99c burger or two. If anyone has a good dinner recipe then lay it on me .. Id like to start expanding my cooking options. Just no Tofu please..done that been there.

Welp I should get some food in my pie hole ( more like Ice cream hole lately but ..hmm.. pie really sounds good actually lol ).

Have an excellent rest of your night..or your day if your sunny side up.

Dave.

[Byrdlady]

Newbies Nest

G man so good to see you! A good crock recipe is a pound of ground turkey, a giant jar of salsa and chili powder. It is so simple yet delicious! I use a lot of chili powder I like it spicy. I also have a killer spaghetti sauce that I make with bacon instead of ground beef. I am a Southerner, after all.
Glad you had a good day! Byrdie

[I'm Strong and in Control]

Newbies Nest

Haven't read any of the posts yet. I've been arguing with myself over going out to get a bottle of fake wine. (The alcohol free stuff). Isn't this silly?!! It's the same 'frenzied child' that tells me to eat more junk food, drink more real wine, stay in bed. I guess it could be telling me to drink/get drunk - I'd like to have some fake wine, just too lazy to go out and get it. I guess it's a craving? It is going to talk to me all night. Anyone outside of the boards would think I'm a lunatic. I am, but that's beside the point . . .

[Lavande]

Newbies Nest

Byrdie, bacon in your spaghetti sauce? What's next?? :H :H

Hello & welcome MNB! Glad to have you with us

Dave, I've been doing a lot of vegan cooking & eating & I don't use any tofu, soy or any of that junk. If you want to look at a good blog to start healthy cooking, take a look at!
Fatfree Vegan Recipes
All the recipes are bacon-free :H

Wishing everyone a safe & cozy night in the nest!
Lav