Newbies Nest

[Loveless]

Newbies Nest

Lifechange my doctor's appointment is on the 26th and until then I am just going to keep trying to cut back a little more each day. I realy need to stick with it this time. I was reading the thread about the 4 stages of alcoholism and I am definitely stage 4. no doubt about it. If i keep on this way I probably will not live a very long life. But this time im determined

[Willow23]

Newbies Nest

Thanks Jellybean. Well done yourself for making it to lunchtime! Baby steps x

[giraffe1234]

Newbies Nest

Lifechange: Way to go! You are an inspiration.

[gambler]

Newbies Nest

Gwawk morning Nesters

Just flying by before Im wayward off to work..

Last night I went into the freezer to grab a little (large) bowl of ice cream only to remember that the boys and I ate it making sundays on Saturday lol. Oh well..I grabbed a small yogurt and went to bed. Your right guys .. the lack of sugar made my morning head fresher and less groggy. I never thought it could/would have effected me like that. Sooo. Im taking a ice cream hiatus. Better nip this one in the bud before it gets out of hand. Lets see what a week without sugar does. ( well a snack pak or two lumped coffee here and there is still on the table ).

Anyways I have to run guys..but tonight I plan on putting on the MWO butt velcro and catch up on a few pages. So many new peeps and I dont think I even said Hello to you. Sorry bout that..

Have a great monday maties and matettes

Dave

[Lavande]

Newbies Nest

Good Monday morning Nesters,

Glad those storms weren't too much of a bother for you Dave
I kept waking up hearing 'strong thunderstorms possible' alerts on my phone all night - never happened here.

Welcome back Jellybean, this is the place to be

Giraffe, CONGRATS on your AF time, terrific!!!

Loveless, glad to hear you are sticking to your plan. One day at a time, right?

Willow, hope you can muster up the strength to hop right back on the sober bus with us. There's just no sense in repeating the same old pattern ~ the ending never changes!

Greetings to the rest & wishes for a wonderful AF Monday for all.

Lav

[I'm Strong and in Control]

Newbies Nest

MAW GWAWKers
Dave - I love seeing those 2 smiling brilliant faces - really cheered me up this morning. I'm sad, haven't taken the time to meditate this am or figure out what is going on. Feeling better the minute I saw your avatar.
Not much time, late as usual. Willow - keep using this as an opportunity to explore what you discovered about yourself. You came back - someone who does not want to be sober would not be here. Big hugs to you today.
I want to apologize to all (and myself), I just haven't taken the time to read all the posts and want to catch up with all of your news - and your posts about your journey help give me clarification, hope and inspiration. A bit more difficult to read posts when my husband is in town, as I want to spend time with him as well (and he seems to be such a chatterbox lately). Hoping the sun is shining today wherever you are. I'm not drinking today.

[Loveless]

Newbies Nest

yup im just taking it day by day. I really tried to wait until at least until after lunch today, but I just cou,ldnt because the shakes and nausea was too bad. I'm so ashamed of myself that my addiction has gotten this bad, I hope sometime in the future i will be able to forgive myself for everything that ive done to myself and my family....everytime i drink or get withdrawal symptoms i feel liek a loser....which then in turn makes me want to drink its a vicious cycle!

[I'm Strong and in Control]

Newbies Nest

I think it's time for my refresher course - why I stopped drinking. It has been 6? weeks - good time for a reminder. I'm not drinking today.

[jellybean1970]

Newbies Nest

Oh Loveless I'm so with you, I know how it feels. Can you just make it as small as you can? Today I'm at the longest I have ever gone and am close to giving in. I don't know anything about your journey (I'll try and work out how to look it up) but what I have done the last few days is to try to just start as little as half an hour later each day. it has generally reduced my total consumption and seems to have helped. You are NOT a loser, you're a trier, surely that is why you are here? How long since you had the drink? What did you have? Can you set yourself a time limit before you have the next one? No idea on the time diff for Canada to UK but I'm staying logged on here and only taking breaks of 15 minutes at a time so yell when you need.

[I'm Strong and in Control]

Newbies Nest

Loveless - you are doing what you need to do to help yourself recover. Your doctor's appointment is a week away. Can you call your local AA office? It could be very healing for you to actually speak with someone who has gone thru withdrawals.

[Loveless]

Newbies Nest

hi jellybean, I am 22 and have been an alcoholic for nearly 5 years. I am also a recovering opiate addict and i smoke alot of weed aswell. Lately al has been affecting my life negatively more and more to the point where i decided enough is enough. but i am a stage four alcoholic and everytime i have tried to quit cold turkey, I have had seizures and have ended up hospitalized. My common-law husband is also an alcoholic but i do not think he is ready to try and quit yet. I made a doctors appointment for nov. 26th (shes on vacation or it would be sooner), but until then since i know i cant stop all together i have trying to at least cut back on my consumption. The problem is:
1. I need to drink as soon as i wake up each morning just to function/get rid of the shakes &
2. Once i have one drink, i find it very difficult (and by that i mean nearly impossible) to control when i stop. yesterday, I managed to have around 2-3 less drinks than i usually do, which i considered to be a great achievement....now its 9:36 am and ive already had 4. I just dont know what to do anymore. I have rheumatoid arthritis and am not supposed to drink with my medication its very bad and can kill me but i cant control it....lately i have been getting more and more depressed aswell. I was even suicidal a few days ago but ended up passing oout before i could do anything stupid. I feel like ive hit rock bottom

[NoSugar]

Newbies Nest

available;1586684 wrote: You get the taste and it takes you back again. I'm fighting it but it is hard but I have been through those first few days of giving up and know this moderation thing is unattainable for an alcoholic. You should be very very proud of your achievements. I know I will get there. I know I was so much happier and healthier without AL.
Hi, Available. You were happy without AL and all of us know because you were posting very regularly . Do you think it would help now if you got back in that habit? (I've missed your posts - You are quite a hoot! :l).

I think you've written what anyone who is considering an occasional drink needs to consider:
You get the taste and it takes you back again.
If I remember, you were going to drink a bit at the bachelorette party and then at the wedding and you succeeded in not drinking too much, which is great, but that little bit awakened the beast. The same thing is likely to happen to anyone who thinks the "special occasion" drink is no big deal. That special drink probably isn't the big deal but what it almost inevitably leads to is.

So for anyone who is trying to decide, why not plan now NOT to drink at Thanksgiving, Christmas, New Year's Eve, or any of the days in between? Spare yourself thinking about this for the next 6 weeks. Anticipate each holiday for what it is, not as your next excuse to drink. Don't get your addicted voice all ramped up by giving it that taste. He may whine a bit now and then but after awhile, that voice is mostly quiet as long as you never give in.

Lifechange had an early Thanksgiving and this is one of the most inspiring, grateful posts I've seen. Each of us could feel as good about our holidays if we follow her lead:

lifechange;1586680 wrote:
Good conversation going on here the past couple of days. I've pretty much been set on not drinking during the holidays. I've had a firm plan in my mind for 2 months--as I know it will be difficult with my Dad. Breaking old habits, a house full of alcohol. Yesterday I had an early Thanksgiving with my 3 closest friends (two of whom have accepted that I don't drink anymore and one who seems to finally be getting it). They brought wine and I had some juice and sparkling water for myself and the kids. I'd thought about buying some af stuff, but forgot in the end. They offered me a glass at dinner "to toast" and I found it a bit awkward to say no, but I did and toasted with sparkling water. I was so determined not to drink and so proud of myself that I was almost giddy-- it was almost like I was tipsy, with giggling fits and the whole works. I ate too much, as usual, and was so thankful not to be exhausted from the drink as well. While we were cleaning up, the friend who's been hesitant to accept my not drinking, told me how impressed she was at the changes I've made in my life. And another said she agreed.. that I was slowly making the changes I needed to make the life I wanted to live. She said I inspired her!! That was such a compliment-- one I haven't heard for ages. You know, everyone has their "problems", things they're working on, trying to change. I forget sometimes, because quitting drinking is so difficult in this society, and because I'm so absorbed with this particular problem, that almost everyone is struggling with something. I was so happy and proud of myself in that moment for being strong and determined enough to stand by what I KNOW is necessary for ME to live a happy life. I haven't taken responsibility for my own well being for such a long time--if ever!-- and it does feel so good. We all have our own experiences and have to make our own decisions. I feel so fortunate to have you all here to share this very hard but worthwhile journey. We need eachother and other like minded people to support us.
Just wanted to share that. Every time we have an experience without alcohol, we strengthen ourselves and our resolve. And slowly, slowly the days add up and it becomes our normal. I'm slowly beginning to believe that life is really, truly better now.

blah blah!!:H

Big hugs to all of you--

I'm so impressed by and happy for you, Lifechange :l! You are an inspiration!

[jellybean1970]

Newbies Nest

Loveless my pattern sounds similar to yours but I'm a 43 year old widow. I was sort of functioning until Feb this year when I was signed off sick and since then have started drinking as early as 7am most days. I also can't stop once I start. I have found this last week though that switching to a very small glass, recording the time I had it, booking something for me to achieve before I have the next one have worked for the last 6 days. Time wise is 13.45 here in the UK and I'm literally breaking my day into 15 minute achievement slots. What do you have planned for today? Can you make a list and do one small thing? I know it can seem insurmountable my biggest achievement today is I picked up off my bedroom floor the outfit I was wearing when my boyfriend dumped me 14 weeks ago. You can do it! This place is amazing. Keep checking in.

[Loveless]

Newbies Nest

I don't really know what to do today. I haven't really been doing that much since I went on disability for my RA....except for drinking and smoking weed. I really need to find something to keep myself busy, if only to slow me down so im not drunk by the afternoon...but any progress is good i suppose. also another excuse i would use to drink more would be my pain from my arthritis and my nausea from the medication (which of course made it worse anyway), when i woke up this morning, not only were my hands shaking violently, but they are also terribly swollen. I do it to numb myself. My husband is also an alcoholic so he doesn't really say anything to me about my drinking....but my kid and other family are definitely starting to notice, I don't want my son to know about any of this, and i sure as hell dont want to lose him...but im just rambling now....

[jellybean1970]

Newbies Nest

Rambling is good. Mine got worse when signed off after an accident and pain and boredom a big problem. My kids know way too much sadly. How old is yours? Can you do some housework? As you can tell I haven't until today, but since my last post I've hovered (even the bedroom as the dust around my outfit made it look like one of those body outlines at a murder scene). I'm writing lists too. Pick one thing to do and go do it now, then tick it off your list. Hang in there.