Newbies Nest

[Tess-2]

Newbies Nest

MossRose - Thank you for the warm welcome back.

4me - I'm not sure how many AF days. I quit on January 1 of this year.

I have many old friends to catch up with and many new friends to meet. Hugs to All.

[MossRose]

Newbies Nest

Isty - thanks for the kind words, but there have been times when I have said things that I regret. However, I am one who subscribes to the "glass house" theory. Really, my track record hasn't been exactly stellar, so I never feel comfortable telling anyone that they should do something (well, except for once, but that's another story). But in this instance, it was more about this member feeling "ganged up on" for a better word. I felt awful when I heard that. Truthfully, I don't think it was entirely true. But it was this person's perception, and I felt terrible about it. So, I will be more careful in the future.

[Willow23]

Newbies Nest

istym4me;1589256 wrote:

Willow, you are just so much like I used to be. It's all about the kids!

It totally is. My entire life is devoted to their happiness - which is hard for most people to understand. Even my real life friends think it's crazy that I never have time for myself, but I honestly don't mind. DH says that I'm an amazing mother and he doesn't know how I have the patience lol.

[Samstone]

Newbies Nest

Tess-2;1589271 wrote: Hello to All,

I am returning to Newbies Nest after a bit of a break. I have not had a chance to read back. I am happy to be here with all of you. I am very happy to be home.

Well hello there, glad you're back!!!

[Pinecone]

Newbies Nest

Tess-2;1589271 wrote: Hello to All,

I am returning to Newbies Nest after a bit of a break. I have not had a chance to read back. I am happy to be here with all of you. I am very happy to be home.

Hi Tess, it's good to see you again! I often wondered how you were doing.

[Byrdlady]

Newbies Nest

Hey Tess!!!
Great to see you! We have missed you! So glad that you remain AF! Wow, have thought of you so many times and hoped you were doing ok. Hugs dear lady! Byrdie

[Tess-2]

Newbies Nest

Hello Sam - So happy to hear from you!! How is life??

Hi Pinecone - I'm doing well. And how are you??

Byrdie - I have missed you, too. Have needed some time to sort things out. Hugs back to you, Dearest Nest Friend!!

[Londoner]

Newbies Nest

Home, sober and ready for bed. Not one bit of alcohol was consumed between us.

Maybe in the past no one has really egged me on to drink, but I have used the thought of my friends egging me on to drink as a reason to get pissed. We seek what we want.

Definitely have been selfish and self centred for too long. I need to give back now, instead of just taking.

A few big nights coming up, and I've said no straight away to all of them. Even planning a sober Christmas Eve and new years eve.

[WineBGone]

Newbies Nest

I have been following the "Loveless" posts for several days and although I haven't posted, I have been tempted many times. I held back because what I was going to say wasn't going to help the situation.

The beauty of the forums is our right to express ourselves, our vulnerabilities, fears, hopes, successes AND opinions. With that right, comes the rights of others to express their thoughts, feelings and opinions as well. You may not like what other people have to say.

When you post on here, you open yourself up to opinions and judgements that may be considered tough love or cruel…..it is easier to judge and condemn behind a keyboard, than it is face to face. Having said that, I truly believe that everyone here genuinely wanted her to get help and take care of her son.

I personally don't post very often, but find that my strength comes from reading about other peoples success. We all have our reasons for posting or just reading, but I felt that after she posted 135 times over a one week period, her situation seemed more alarming than originally thought (i.e. coughing up blood). I think the "tough love" comments were meant to push her into action and I am glad she chose to get help. I don't condemn people who speak what is on their mind and understand that it is more likely to happen in a forum like this. We all express our thoughts and words differently. I wonder if we hadn't given some tough love, whether she would have chosen to enter detox…..hmmm.

[Lavande]

Newbies Nest

Good evening Nesters,

Welcome back Tess

I see lots of folks doing so well here, makes me happy

I am someone who has posted on the Newbies Nest thread almost since it's beginning!
I can honestly say that the nest IS a safe place for the newbies just getting started.
I can also say that's it's not true that 90% of the people posting here are wasted - that's ridiculous!

Occasionally you will see a post from me or Brydie or someone else with a lot of AF time 'asking' a newbie not to post here about their attempts to moderate. There is a separate thread for that. The majority of the people here are trying their hardest to get those few precious AF days under their belts. Yes, people make mistakes, people screw up. We are supposed to be helping one another to succeed. Sharing our own experiences here does help provided one is willing to listen.

Sometimes people need more help than we can provide. I have been around MWO for nearly 5 years now & have seen lots of people come & go. I've even seen a few come & struggle horribly only to end up dying in a terrible state. Let's all remember to be kindly supportive, think before you post something that could hurt another.

Wishing everyone a peaceful night!
Lav

[gambler]

Newbies Nest

Hello fellow Nesters

Hope everyone is enjoying their book or movie..or oatmeal or coffee.

Hi Humble. I think I read about the same guy. Though Im sure there were mitigating circumstances involved. Oh and Im so glad you described yourself as a female. I was sure to call you Dude, Buddy or something like that. Im getting better at the whole presumptuous gender deal..

I was accused of being Maynard G. Krebs reincarnate Cat. I can see some correlation.

Willow23;1589181 wrote: Cannot wait for Episode 7 in 2014.

I thought it was closer to 2016 ( Dec 18 2015 actual release date ). You had me startled there Willow. That would have been sweet though..


Well half my day was devoted to my Monday Attire. I was just about out the door this morning when I thought that I should do a little research on what to wear to court. I knew it wasn't a tux or Jeans and a T. After a few ideas I went to a local thrift store that was located in a ritzy part of town. Well hell..I don't know much about suits unless it has grinding or spray painting involved. After about an hour trying to match up a semi coordinated respectable outfit I gave up and started asking a few of the older female patrons for an opinion. Luckily I did well in their eyes and was especially complimented on the sweater I chose. So back home I went to try out everything ( this particular store does not have fitting rooms ) to make sure of fit and overall appearance. Everything looked and fit ok to me .. but I still had doubts about things like how the cuffs should be etc. I went back to my research only to find even more advice leaning towards a professional suit type outfit. I was going crazy trying to make up my mind as to what is appropriate. Ive never really had to deal with making a good impression or from what I had read is to "show respect". I cant believe how nervous I was today just on what Im wearing. I found myself reading for hours on what to expect during this hearing..or appearance. I Think I have some idea so I feel a bit more relaxed now. Honestly, I have not had any appetite and have not eaten anything all day. I dont feel like cooking but I know I should eat something. I also know myself well enough to realize that there is a good possibility of not getting much sleep tomorrow night. So decided it might be best for me to force myself to stay awake late tonight to help get to bed early on Sunday night.

I again want to thank everyone just for listening to my ramblings. I know that they are a read and a half but it does help just to be able to talk. Just having some kind of human interaction albeit online is greatly appreciated.:thanks: When this is over I fully intend to be more involved with Your day to day lives instead of mine. For now I have little choice in dedicating most of my energy and thoughts towards my boys.

Well Im off for a bit to nibble on sandwich or a bowl of cereal.

Wishing the Nest the Best

Dave

[allankay]

Newbies Nest

Hello NN.

Have not posted here in a while, however tonight was so exceptionally awesome and cruel that I had to rant a little.

I was invited to a big event. The company rented out one of the top clubs in the city, all drinks food included. There was plenty of entertainment and a show. I was in a good company. Every time I ordered a round the waitress would put vodka in my drink because a typical round would be 3 vodkas and .... and a diet coke, so she naturally assumed that there should be vodka in the coke also. So I accidently swallowed the first sip as I wasn't expecting alcohol. Lemon covered the smell of vodka.

Later we moved on to another trendy club where the company reserved part of the seating area. I met two very good looking and seemingly smart girls and introduced them to my friend. We had a good chat, danced a little. It turns out that she works very close to me and we agreed to have lunch. The conversation became increasingly flirty. Then she asked me "what are you drinking", I replied "diet coke and lemon" she said that I needed some booze in my drink and she poured vodka into my glass, which I immediately put down. She said "whats wrong"? I replied I don't drink.

At this point she instantly sat back and crossed her arms. And started asking me questions. Are you sick? are you a drug addict? Are you religious? What is wrong with you... I was shocked at such a hostile response after such a pleasant conversation. She told me that I was the first person she has ever met who doesn't drink and she suspected there was a sinister reason for it and demanded that I would tell her. At this point I had to leave. Unfortunately my friend was enjoying the company of her friend and had to leave also as he couldn't stay in that position.

So even though I am used to hearing negative comments about me not drinking, I have never experienced such outright hostility and suspicion.

I would love to hear your most outrageous comments / experiences when it comes to negative stigma that is attached to teetotallers

Allan

[Dottie Belle]

Newbies Nest

Allan how rude.....my friends dont care if I drink or not...some have said they would drink my portion too....so guess I am lucky.

[allankay]

Newbies Nest

Dottie Belle;1589321 wrote: Allan how rude.....my friends dont care if I drink or not...some have said they would drink my portion too....so guess I am lucky.

Dottie, my friends don't either. These were two people I just met. Bu it is a shame that seemingly good and smart people can be so clueless in this regard.

AK

[sanchez]

Newbies Nest

Hi Allan
So far I never have had anyone, friend or acquaintance say too much about me abstaining. Maybe a little teasing but nothing rude or malicious. However, one night at a busness dinner a colleague sitting at our table ordered a soft drink. Another person at our table said something to the effect of "a little problem have we?" I was dumbfounded and embarrassed for my co-worker. He calmly said "I choose not to drink ". He said it in such a cool, calm and collected manner that was the end of that discussion. I think the guy thought he was being funny but rather made himself look like an absolute buffoon.