Newbies Nest

[NoSugar]

Newbies Nest

lclem;1602274 wrote: Byrdie
Wondering if after 2 years AF are you able to live not really thinking about alcohol, or is "not drinking" aways on your mind

Hi, Iclem

For awhile I thought that the thinking about not drinking was going to drive me crazy because I was thinking "I can't drink" seemingly all the time. Over time it switches to "I don't have to drink" because you've gotten it out of your system and learned other ways to cope. Still later you won't think about it much other than "I don't drink and how great is that!" Essentially all of my thoughts about not drinking now are positive so I'm glad when they cross my mind.

You can change your brain to one of a willing non-drinker - and it doesn't even take 2 years. Just take it a day at a time and you'll get there. If you have time now, please go back and read some of the earlier posts in the Newbies Nest and be sure to check out the Toolbox - you'll learn so much about how to get this done. And you'll see that you are not at all alone.

Glad you found us!

[Lavande]

Newbies Nest

Hello & welcome Iclem!
Glad you decided to join us
I think everyone is different - I don't think about AL anymore. If & when I get a thought I quickly dismiss it acknowledging that 'I don't drink anymore'.
Developing an attitude of gratitude for getting the monkey off your back helps a lot!!
Be sure you look thru the Tool box - wishing you the best

Lav

[NoSugar]

Newbies Nest

lclem;1602297 wrote: It seems like even when your sober ,you are still a prisoner to it.

This does not have to be true. If you drink, alcohol is in control and you are the prisoner. If you don't, you are in control and alcohol is nothing.

[allankay]

Newbies Nest

NoSugar;1602304 wrote: This does not have to be true. If you drink, alcohol is in control and you are the prisoner. If you don't, you are in control and alcohol is nothing.

Nicely said NS.

[Overit44]

Newbies Nest

hey all, still here, just busy. Happy AF Holidays!

[Byrdlady]

Newbies Nest

Iclem,
I am far from a prisomer to AL! Being tied to a bottle or my next drink was the prison. Since i am so active in the nest here, maybe I think about AL more than others, but I think abiout it in terms of writing words for new folks, such as yourself. I try to put into words what Im feeling. I absolutely HATE AL for what its done to me and my friends here. I have not seen any good come from it...no situation improved, no vacation enhanced, no party more fun. To us, its all about the next drink and the compulsion to get it. One or two is never enough. No matter how much time goes by, I must be vigilant. My motto is NOT ONE NOT EVER! Ive spent too much of my life in alcohell, I want no more. You will learn how to live without AL just as you learned to crave it. Like Alan and NoSugar said, it just isnt that important anymore. Its as powerful as you let it be.
Get all the AL out of your space and aet yourself up to succeed. Surround youself with things you love to do and eat. Keeping your tummy full is the best advice out there! We are all right by your side! Byrdie

[Pinecone]

Newbies Nest

Hi Iclem and welcome! I just want to echo what these fine people have said. AF (alcohol free) life has brought me freedom and relief. It is the relief I was chasing that I thought was in the bottle. I often think to myself: "Thank god I don't drink!" Deprivation or a feeling of lingering obsession have nothing to do with it. I am so grateful to have gotten off the terrible ride. Stop feeding it and it will wither and dry up. Then the real you can come back out. What a powerful experience! You are in good company!

[Dottie Belle]

Newbies Nest

Hello Iclem I want to welcome you and echo what the other folks have said...Not having AL to fuss about is very freeing and empowering...U CAN DO IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[Samstone]

Newbies Nest

Glad you've joined us Iclem
feels like the prison to me is waking up feeling like hell with bars of regret and remorse, inescapable to continue the next day, as you say, the dark cycle. Freedom from that prison is being AF and never forgetting how I escaped.

That being said, each of us has to find our way in our own time, for some it is a very difficult time because of the never ending regret of not being able to drink. Some try to moderate, something that does not work for me so I can't say how successful they are because I don't go there. Once the thought of losing the "friend" that causes trouble becomes a "thank god that bastard is out of my life" things change and keep changing. The old paradigm shift.

Wishing you the best, keep posting, keep learning!!
Sam

[little beagle]

Newbies Nest

Just to add my voice to the other's, I am so happy to be free of that tyrant al.

[Myluck]

Newbies Nest

Hi all, welcome iiclem - this sia good place to be. Just chcking in quickly.

[aclassicgirl]

Newbies Nest

Bryd, your post rings so true. Welcome Iclem!

[Lavande]

Newbies Nest

It's after 11 pm but want to wish everyone a safe night in the nest!
Everyone stay close to the nest for the next few days, make it your lifeline

Lav

[Pavati]

Newbies Nest

Love to see all of you veterans checking in to help the newbies during this stressful time of years. Butt velcro, check. Hanging on to tail feathers, check.

Plan for an AF Christmas Eve - taking it easy in the morning, skating in the afternoon. I have a special bottle of grapefruit juice and sparking water that I'll take to the in laws, and I'll check in here. As it turns out I have a pretty bad cold, so it really shouldn't be too difficult.

If I'm thinking of drinking - STOP. Play the scene forward to my worst hangover and be grateful I don't have to do that ever again (oh, and did I say, come here).

Hang tight, nesters. Sleep well. Good night from the end of day 22.

[HumbleRider]

Newbies Nest

Welcome Iclem. I wouldn't be on day 52 without the help of everyone here. Words of wisdom and encouragement and sage advice abound here.