Newbies Nest

[Londoner]

Newbies Nest

little beagle;1610694 wrote: Lost Soul a little over 250 days.
Bhalo it's great to see you here.
Londoner I'm glad you don't have the funds to drink. I hope when you do have the $ you chose not to.
Have a great day all.

That's the plan. Re-condition the body and mind while I have no funds - in turn I will have the energy and motivation to build more of my career, and when I do have the funds again I will be well and truly AF.

Sometimes we need a crisis to get the best out of life.

[3June2013]

Newbies Nest

Badger before I forget thanks for finding the link for me. Rain in my Heart had a huge impact on me early in my quit and I am in the process of helping a friend who is ten days AF.

Londoner good to see you! I hope you've been able to find new pastimes to get you through the weekends?

I am enjoying my vacation and settling into a quiet restful life. I still check my work email too often but I don't answer them LOL. Yoga every day, walking and bike riding. Swimming, reading, ahh this is the life!

For those of you struggling try to imagine a day when you won't think of ALat all. Believe me, you will come to the point where you don't want Al, that's true freedom.

[Loveless]

Newbies Nest

Hey hope everyone is doing well.

It's day 12 for me. Since I left detox I have been taking medications for my anxiety which have been helping alot. But I have none left and cannot see my doctor until next week. Also there is booze in the house because my husband is still drinking.

Trying to take it 1 hour at a time today....

[Samstone]

Newbies Nest

Gambler Dave??

[Dottie Belle]

Newbies Nest

MAE all,
Folks arrived early to start on the leak fix..woke us up and the dogs are going crazy....I have to leave for a funeral at church... I am on a team that makes lunch after the service so I must go...
Loveless cant u call the doc and get a refill...dont wait. Please dont use either of the issues u mentioned as an excuse....u have 12 days behind u and only good things ahead...NO backsliding! U can and must do this for you and your son....

[broken halo]

Newbies Nest

Halo congrats on the 90 days. How has the journey been so far?

Thanks Londoner. It has had it's ups and downs but I am feeling really good right now. I had to address some other issues that have affected me in the past and that has helped enormously.

Your post shows how determined you are to make 2014 your year to get rid of AL and the detrimental effect it has on your thinking and your life. Go for it! You have nothing to lose except misery, and everything to gain!

[Byrdlady]

Newbies Nest

Morning, Nesters!
Dottie, I hope you get all your pipes fixed, what a mess you have had!

Loveless, Dot Belle is right, 12 days is where I kept falling and if you hang in there one more day I think you will turn the corner! Is there any way you could have someone take that AL and put it out of your space? A neighbor or something? If your hubs chooses to drink his life away, then he'll have to find a less convenient way to do it. GET IT OUT! I wish we could get him on board, too...you'd think he would see what a struggle you've had (detox twice!) that must put a tremendous burden on him while you've been gone? Is he not seeing this at all?
Can you leave the house and go somewhere for a while until the urge passes?

Lav said it last night but she has a way of saying profound things in a short span of space...sometimes it doesn't sink in and get absorbed. She wrote:
Remember, each sober day builds on the previous sober day & pretty soon you will come to realize that you no longer have cravings, barely even a thought about AL. It all becomes much easier once you choose to kick AL out & take back control of your life


She is giving us The Key to the City here. These words are so true it's scary. Just get another AF day under your belt, no matter what. Stringing those (consecutive) AF days together builds your IMMUNITY (at least, as much Immunity as you can have to AL). Adopting a Zero Tolerance Plan and living every day with a sense of gratitude (not self pity) will get you to home plate. ALL of us dream of a day when AL thoughts don't enter our thoughts, and the only way to achieve that is to NOT DRINK AL TODAY. You can have MindPeace....but you MUST STARVE this monster and not give it one drop to live on. Feeding it, even one day or one drink, brings it back in full force. Notice I said CONSECUTIVE days....I used to say that I had X number of sober days that month and I was doing great...but that is compared to ME...if you compare my sober days to a normal person, it was still appalling. If you have a string of AF days and then you drink, you are starting over. You are having a Ground Hog Day of Day 1's. BREAK the cycle. Make up your mind and just do it! This month I will have ALL sober days!

Thank you, Lav, for your wise words. I am so glad I latched on to your tail feathers! (hope you don't mind me back here). XXOO, Byrdie

[Londoner]

Newbies Nest

Byrdlady;1610732 wrote: Morning, Nesters!
Lav said it last night but she has a way of saying profound things in a short span of space...sometimes it doesn't sink in and get absorbed. She wrote:
Remember, each sober day builds on the previous sober day & pretty soon you will come to realize that you no longer have cravings, barely even a thought about AL. It all becomes much easier once you choose to kick AL out & take back control of your life

I had a thought - having a 100ml container and each day AF I would use a pipette to drop 1ml of water into the 100ml container.

If I drink AL I would empty the container.

You would not notice much difference from day to day AF, but each week there would be a tremendous amount of added water (or improvements in your life).

[Pavati]

Newbies Nest

Hi, BH - 90 is awesome.

Lav - such great and true words.

Love - run, don't walk away from that booze (or pour it down the drain).

Ok - Everyone. What the people whose tail feathers I am holding always say - what's your plan for the weekend? Friday is just another day. Stay strong!

[Loveless]

Newbies Nest

I told my husband that if he is going to continue to drink and not get help to keep it and do it away from me. Sometimes I feel like he wants me to start drinking again just so I can't nag at him about it. or maybe he misses his "drinking buddy"...but maybe i am just paranoid.

I admit I have been struggling since I left detox but it has also been so nice getting back into my painting and the other hobbies i lost interest in while i was drinking. I also love going out and playing with my son and not needing to bring a bottle in my purse wherever we went and actually being able to remember what fun we had .

I am worried about my husband but he is making his own choices and I know very well that he is the only person who can make the decision to get help and stop. Right now I am focusing on my own sobriety and my son's welfare.

12 days is a huge deal for me and I am guarding it with all the fight I have in me.

Going to an AA meeting in less than an hour, I have major social anxiety and i am too shy to talk most of the time but I find just being there and listening helps. Yesterday was a huuge milestone for me, it was the first time at AA that I ever introduced myself as an alcoholic, which is something i never thought i could do in front of people.

Taking this fight one hour at a time. I'm not giving up.

Hope everyone is having a wonderful AF day

-Love

[NoSugar]

Newbies Nest

MossRose;1610562 wrote: Hi nesters. It's always hard to jump back into the nest. I feel sort of lost right now, because I haven't had time to read back, therefore I have little to contribute, but I can't think of any other way to do it, so I'm just plunging back in.

LostSoul33;1610588 wrote: Hi Everyone! I am back! I know this week wont be easy, but Ive done it before and will do it again, for good!

broken halo;1610661 wrote: I'm coming back after a bit of a break too and I feel a bit out of the loop.To everyone else that I haven't mentioned (let's face it, there are way too many people to mention by name these days!) I'm looking forward to getting back into the swing of things here in the nest and catching up with everyone!

It is so great to see you guys back in the Nest :l! As you know, we don't have to be new to all this to hang out here - it is the best thread for getting quick responses and for giving some support when it is most needed.

Even true newbies, don't be shy about offering support even though you don't have long stretches of AF time behind you. Sometimes a person who is near the same stage can understand and phrase things in the best way - you're not writing about what you remember, you're living it! The other thing is, the more you organize your thoughts and type them out for other people, the more those messages become YOU. Here is a sort of trivial example of a man who wanted to be a "morning person" so he thought himself into one: You Are What You Think You Are ? Positively Positive.

You can think and type yourself into being a content non-drinker. See yourself that way and don't forget to notice and appreciate all of the good things - large and small - that come from being that person.

Enjoy the weekend and notice how good it feels to wake up each morning feeling good and having the whole day before you. Between the additional hours of living each morning and evening, I feel like I've increased my living time by ~ 1/3 and who wouldn't want a 3-day weekend???

[brendalicious]

Newbies Nest

Hi...this is my first time here.

I've been drinking for 41 years and have recently quit, as has my husband, for the past 5 days. The week wasn't so bad as I was working and it was taking up time, and then we've been going to bed early at night. But the weekend is coming and I am a bit apprehensive. I know that I should keep myself busy so that I don't drink. Do you guys have any suggestions for me? I would greatly appreciate them.:new:

[K9Lover]

Newbies Nest

Loves - You sound SO good. You have the right attitude about your husband, only HE can choose to stop drinking...so for now, you must concentrate on your own sobriety, for your sake and your sons. You are doing a great job...I am proud of you!

Yeah, where is Gambler Dave....he is missed around here!!!

Happy Friday everyone...stay strong and remember that your reward for a hard week is staying sober, not drinking! You'll never regret not drinking the night before.

[NoSugar]

Newbies Nest

brendalicious;1610777 wrote: I've been drinking for 41 years and have recently quit, as has my husband, for the past 5 days. The week wasn't so bad as I was working and it was taking up time, and then we've been going to bed early at night. But the weekend is coming and I am a bit apprehensive. I know that I should keep myself busy so that I don't drink. Do you guys have any suggestions for me? I would greatly appreciate them.:new:

Welcome!

Congratulations on your 5 days. It is great that your husband is doing this with you!

You are right that you need a plan. The Toolbox (link below) is full of good ideas. You could keep yourself busy most of the weekend just reading that and developing your own plan!!

One good idea is to stay connected here for awhile and read/post if you're feeling tempted to take a drink.

:welcome::welcome::welcome:

[NomoreJim]

Newbies Nest

It's Friday and I'm actually looking foward to the weekend. I used to have to try to figure out how I could drink with my wife around and not get caught! Don't have to worry about that! Congratulations Halo I haven't done 90 consecutive days for over 7 years I am looking forward to that. Loveless, it is very tough dealing with the anxiety, that is usually what made me start drinking again. I have been af for 10 days now. I had to get it through my thick skull that the alcohol was causing some of my anxiety (most of it actually). Now that I realilze that and have gotten a handle on the other causes of anxiety it has made this quit much easier. I still think about drinking every day but it is alot easier to re-direct my thoughts. Hope this helps. Good luck