Newbies Nest

[K9Lover]

Newbies Nest

Starfish1;1620567 wrote: Hey BTW, I LOVE the cute hair. I kept mine like that for a few years and just loved it. Now I am trying to let it grow out one more time before I get too old for long hair. Thinking about starting to wear a granny bun actually :sigh:

Thanks!!! A granny bun will still require work: washing, brushing, etc. My next 'do is going to be the Britney-Spears-Crazy-Phase style....shaved bald! :dunno:ull

[Byrdlady]

Newbies Nest

Fly by....in a training class. My memory is full....Hugs all, Byrdie

[Marylou123]

Newbies Nest

Hi Friends,

Pav and Poppy -- congratulations on 60 AF days!!

And K9, wow, what a wonderful accomplishment.

Today is a good day for me, I'm certainly feeling more optimistic about my situation.

Daft, my advice would be to beg off the golf tourney. You've made a great decision to quit drinking. Why subject yourself to the temptation? Maybe you could host a "Post Tourney Breakfast" for the hosts during the week to net out some biz opportunities. If it were me, I'd be like Star. No way could I say no at a function like that this early in my sobriety. I was the fun party girl at many of those types of functions in the past. I bet if I hadn't been having so much "fun" I would have capitalized on the networking much better. Play it safe.

Love you all - M

[Roller Girl]

Newbies Nest

Hey DJ, I don't know how helpful this is, but I have those kind of thoughts about a couple of upcoming social occasions, including a few I have managed to enjoy in a (fairly) sensible way in the past without getting horrible blacked-out drunk and embarrassing myself. The problem is (for me, anyway) it is so hit-and-miss after I have the 1st drink, if / when I'll stop, and on occasions where access to alcohol is pretty unlimited then the chances of stopping at a sensible level are minimal.

So this is my plan, it is yet-to-be-tested & I will report back here if any / all of my strategies work, but for a party this weekend at a friend's house I am going to drive, which will not only provide me with incentive not to drink but makes it easy & acceptable to say "Just a softy for me please as I'm driving" (having been such a big drinker for years if I've ever turned down a drink in the past the first question is usually "Ooooooh are you pregnant then?" so for me something like driving is a nice reasonable end to that conversation).

For an upcoming dinner party I'm hosting, I think this will be the toughest, but I will try to concentrate on not drinking so I can be attentive to my guests & hopefully give them a good time, rather than my usual trick of getting the food etc ready, having a few drinks before people arrive, getting steadily drunk throughout the evening then going to bed about 10pm leaving my husband to see people home and explain that "she's very tired, stress at work etc" (when I'm sure everyone who knows me, or who has paid any attention to me that evening, is well aware of the truth) then clean up the mess and be disappointed with me (again) the next morning while I have to ask him what was said and if I made an idiot of myself (again). So I will keep in mind that I want this one to be different.

Finally there's a holiday we have planned, a weekend by the sea, where I would usually associate it with drinking on the beach until I had to go back to the hotel to sleep the afternoon away, to wake up in the evening & do it all again. So we have booked a self-catering apartment, rather than a hotel room with a bar downstairs, and are just not going to buy any alcohol. That simple. Will go for lunches in cafes and buy food to cook ourselves a lovely meal in the evening on our balnocy, and just not have alcohol be part of it.

So they're my plans! I know your situation is not entirely like mine, but I hope my ideas might help you a bit to formulate some of your own.

Keep us posted on how you go x

[Starfish1]

Newbies Nest

Sounding great Mary Lou

[Starfish1]

Newbies Nest

Oops, Cross post- You too, RG...great planning going on there

[Roller Girl]

Newbies Nest

Newbies :-( after starting Day 3 so positive I've just had a massive anxiety spike after having brief (and probably not really too bad) dealings with my neighbour, but this is on the back of a series of issues that have stressed me out, as I feel he is very difficult and unreasonable about stuff that really doesn't affect him. I won't bore you with the details but I felt my blood pressure skyrocket and the trembling / jitters coming on. Only Day 3 & I really want a couple of drinks to take the edge off it :-( I mean I couldn't anyway right now as I'm off to work soon, but my mind is thinking "Yeah but another 8 hours you can come home & drink it all away." I've walked my dogs & eaten a banana (not a typical strategy, I know, but I like bananas lol) and it's abating a bit but ugh it's an uncomfortable feeling :-(

*Acceptance* *Mindfullness* *Sitting with anxiety until it passes* *Not having a drink just for today* so easy to say but hard to do.....

Sorry just had to vent, any advice always welcome xxx

[jenniech]

Newbies Nest

Roller Girl….wow have I been there before!! Just keep in mind that the hour or so of respite from the stresses and anxieties of the day are MUCH shorter in duration than the inevitable bad sleep and hangover the next day…..and for me, the EATING that happens when my inhibitions are suppressed by AL….and all those CALORIES from the booze….kind of stupid if you think about it.

[Lavande]

Newbies Nest

Good evening Nesters,

RG - sounds like you would benefit from this link I've been posting everywhere tonight
Emotional Freedom Techniques by Dr. Friedemann Schaub

Dr Schaub is good, I've read some of his books & listened to him online.

Jane, you asked about my garden - well -
I like to think I can grow anything but :H
The past few years I have focused on growing veggies than I can share & feed to my grandkids. So, broccoli, green beans, Swiss chard, cucumbers, zucchini have been popular. My asparagus patch is about done, only got a few last year, that needs to be replanted. The deer have taken the tops out of my dwarf fruit trees, not sure what I'm going to do about them. Had to destroy my raspberry plants last year, the poison ivy took over in there & I suffered
So, I am going to be doing a lot of new planting this year - when the snow melts, if it ever does

I hope everyone plans to stay put in the nest tonight! Stay warm everyone!

Lav

[available]

Newbies Nest

Roller no one is worth picking up a drink for, absolutely no-one. In my early days my boss pissed me off and that was my immediate thought, "god i am so going to stop at the bottle shop on the way home, how dare he, who does he think he is". He's an arsehole and not worth drinking over, that is who he is. I am better and more in control with no al. Be strong, it will pass.

[Byrdlady]

Newbies Nest

Reposted from the Roll Call:
Default


The Prize Patrol has been in a training class all day and apologizes for the late recognition of major awards! We have some biggies!!!
WineBGone... 100 days! It seems like a lifetime ago doesn't it. Watching you make this journey has been a real pleasure. We are all just thrilled for you!! Here's your One Finger Salute for your efforts!! Giving AL The Bird for 100 days entitles you to post in the 100 day Maintenance Thread!!
:finger:

Pavati and Poppy, speaking of biggins, you both have racked up a pair! You're in DD's!!! (double digits). We are chest busting with pride for you today!!!
:bust: :bust;
Just look at your accomplishment!! These numbers are HUGE! Keep it bouncing along, you will never be sorry!

Narilly and HoneySoup....30 days is a real milestone around here. I always thought if I could just get to 30, I KNOW I could keep it going....and I did...You do the same and you will be richly rewarded! Do you have any words of wisdom!! How'd you do it??? Our hats are off to you!!
:goodtime: :goodtime:

Great job everyone. In the PP's 4 years on this site, I don't recall as much success as we are having right now!!! There is strength in numbers! Keep it going!!! It's a proud day at MWO!!! Well done!

Who'da thought that someone who drank booze from a hairspray bottle would end up awarding prizes on a Forum for not drinking??? You never know!!! Life is GOOD!! xxoo, Byrdie

Edit to add TREE who just checked in with 30 days AND a birthday!!!! :goodtime: Great job, Tree! I couldn't be more proud if you were my own kin! Speech, please!!!! Keep up the great work!!! You'll never regret one day of being sober!!! B

Edit again to add K9 for 2 years sober!!! She's got a really big pair!!! :bust: Wow, that is huge! I didn't realize it had been 2 years! Great job, Missy...and thank you for everything you do on this site and here in the nest! You ROCK!! Have you kept in tough with Diablo? XXOO, b

[Honeysoup]

Newbies Nest

Thanks Byrdie...I have not much to say except I have had my ups and I have had my downs. You have to be on your guard every moment because you never know when that devil will try to wiggle its way back in. You could be having the best day ever and boom it rares its ugly head. Use your resources, ask for help, and always believe in yourself!!

[little beagle]

Newbies Nest

I wish I could just ditto Byrdie's post. Congratulations you guys on those days. They add up and it just keeps getting better and easier. :wave::wave::applaud:
Roller girl just keep sticking to your plan. Planning is key.
HP hope you feel better tomorrow.
I too am thinking about my garden Lav. I had a hard time last year because I didn't quit drinking until end of April. This year is going to be better.
Nite all.

[DreamThinkDo]

Newbies Nest

MAE Nesters!

Lovely day here today - except for the wind. But the rest of the country needs rain - some parts desperately so, so I'll be nice and not complain.

I managed to get a picture of all the Nesters looking very happy and AF: enjoy your coffee.


LB, isn't it nice how we can track our progress against how things were last year/month/week - and things are just so much better then they were. Not perfect, not problem free and not worry free, but I'm so much better at tackling problems as they arise, and not letting them snowball until they become almost impossible to handle. Look, I never wanted to stop drinking, but looking back at my old life and comparing it with my new life - I am so glad I made that decision.

Byrdie, aren't you glad that you (and Star) have to work your butt off on the Prize Patrol.

Everybody, have a lovely and AF POETS day!

(And apologies for the S-word:H - hope it doesn't attract any more falls!)

[Pavati]

Newbies Nest

Thanks everyone for the congratulations. Geez, it feels great – all of the love and support, AND spending the previous 60 days of my life sober (I started writing last 60 days, but that didn’t sound right!).

Dream – no speech from me. Too much else going on for much contemplation. I did have dinner with some very good friends tonight – I haven’t seen them since I quit. I always call them my truth serum friends because for whatever reason I spill my guts when I’m with them. Tonight was no exception – they heard the whole story of the painful year I just went through, the Thanksgiving Massacre, and finding my way out by finding you wonderful people. We laughed and we cried. It felt SO wonderful to get it out in person to great friends who understand. Like a weight off my shoulders. It was fortuitous that it came on Day 60 – a rather large milestone in my book.

Star – you ARE going through a lot in your life. Staying sober will help you cope with it all while you stay healthy and care for yourself. A black cat is lucky, like Byrdie’s favorite number – 13.

Dottie – Vegan? How’s it going? I feel like I like meat too much – well, I value the way high protein foods satisfy my hunger.

Thanks, K9. I love your ‘do, too. I have had the same haircut with one sidetrack into an accidental mullet turned Carol Brady that still gives me nightmares. Maybe it is time to be brave!

Jane – Heh. I’m imagining the Britney Spears shaved head tattoo parlor incident, but with two of you! (*Hah – I’m writing this as I scroll through – I guess K9 DID have Britney in mind!)

Daft – My fears in facing situations like that were one of the big reasons that I kept drinking for so long. As it turns out, I can still be the funniest gal in the room (not all the time – but I guess I never was), carry on conversations, laugh, etc. Without alcohol. Where I live it is not unusual for someone at any given time in any given social situation to be “off the booze for a bit” for some reason (health, detox, weight, lent, hubby’s quitting and I’m supporting, have work to do later, training for a marathon). You don’t have to tell your whole story. That being said, I know many who are newly here don’t risk being in situations like that for fear of losing their resolve, but with one of the excuses above I was ok.

MaryLou – you sound strong – I’m glad you had a great day.

Roller Girl – Love your plans. See my “excuses” above. They all have worked, and believe me people are surprised to see my not drinking but think I’m great to be taking care of myself. (as long as I don’t bring up the A word, which would probably cause them to question their own drinking). WAIT – Just saw your next post – great job coming here. Stay strong. Check out the “urge surfing” advice in the tool box…

Jennie – with you on the eating/calories. I have been eating quite heartily and still lost 6 pounds since I quit drinking. An added benefit…

Lav – that sounds like an organic farm, not a garden! That’s amazing. I do not garden, although I always wish I had fresh veggies. Maybe when my work isn’t sooo busy!

Ava – You are SO right. No one and no thing is worth that drink. Here I am sticking voo doo pins in the doll of your boss…

Byrdie – Thanks for the prize! I don’t need any more bulk in the rack department, but I could use that nice, uplifted pair. Thanks! My chest is swelling with pride.

Honey – I missed you this morning – great on 30 days! I’m glad you stopped by to check in and that you’re staying strong. AL is very sneaky, I agree.

LB – love your wave. It will be amazing the things we can get done without drinking. I look forward to hearing about your gardening.

Well, I think that is everyone since I last posted – a remarkable feat given that in between I helped my son finish his GIANT project on Egypt, cleaned the kitchen and put my clothes away (well, some of the kitchen and some of my clothes).

Thanks again for celebrating with us, everyone. Good night.