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    Newbies Nest

    Icanwithoutacan;1629023 wrote: It wasn't hard tonight just mire tempted than usual and lots if people telling me "your not an alcoholic"
    I've gotten this lately as well! A good friend that I was trying to open up to, ended up telling me that he does not think I have a problem. It's crazy what some people think is normal. I KNOW that I have a problem because I prefer to drink alone, I can't stop once I've started and I constantly think about it. Every time I am in a restaurant my brain automatically goes into "wooo yeah, time to bring on an AL drink" rather than "what sounds good with what I'm eating tonight"? When I was in college, my dinner beverage of choice was Sprite and I never gave a second thought of drinking AL other than at a party. What happened to my brain?

    Sorry for my crazy rambling today. I'm just frustrated and not feeling well. We are suppose to go skiing again this weekend but my back hurts so I'm not in the mood for it at the moment. Hopefully I will feel better by Saturday.

    I know that I have been here for a long time and I should know this by now, but would you guys please share some tips that you have regarding getting through an evening alone? Lately the evening cravings are killer and that cup of tea is just not helping. The stress of my MiLs sickness is really getting to me.

    Much love and strength to you all today.
    Would you like you, if you met you?

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      Newbies Nest

      Muldoon, well what a day but the good thing is you had so many opportunities to drink AT people and what they were doing to your mood but you didnt. Be proud of that. I found in the early days people pissed me off no end, it was like they had a vendetta out against me and my quit but my emotions were all over the place and like you i was so determined not to give in. Wow that girlfriend or ex of yours is pretty full on. Maybe you just need you time to adjust to your new life. Bit amazed about the massage too lol. You have done so very well and tomorrow is another day which i hope is better than the one you have had.

      Keep strong.

      Mein keep the al out of the house girl, we all have to deal with stress and a lot of people do it without al. we are different people and not normal, we know that and i wish others realised that like drug addicts we have a problem with al. When my FIL was dying with cancer i used to go and help out and go home and drink, so many times i went to care for him and i was so hungover but i felt i needed al to cope. He was the one dying not me and i felt i did not give him 100%. Just be there as much as you can, do as much as you can but also have some time for you to unwind and come on here and bitch, it helps.

      Even after 80+ days the last couple of weeks i have had that al brain bit thinking i want a drink. Its there and eventually goes away but sometimes it is hard to ignore. Why would i want a drink now is beyond me but it is the alky brain talking nothing more. We need to be strong in this journey and never ever give in as hard as it may seem as al will not solve our current problems, it will give us more problems to deal with.
      AF free 1st December 2013 - 1st December 2022 - 9 years of freedom

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        Newbies Nest

        So now I'm starting to realise just how much better my health is now, and how bad it was when I was out partying every weekend.

        My skin has a healthy glow to it, and I was worried about frown lines....which seem to be vanishing.

        It hit home yesterday. I had a double wallop of sugary food and was also unproductive. The double wammy of eating badly and mentally not challenging myself hit me for 6.

        Seems I need to be productive and eat well to function at a good level.

        Comment


          Newbies Nest

          Good morning Nesters,

          Muldoon, that was some story there but glad you survived AF.
          Mein, it really doesn't matter what other people think. If You think AL is causing you problems then it's up to you to choose not to drink

          Ava, just keep ignoring the mind chatter - it does eventually go away!
          Remember, it takes a while to build new pathways in our brains. Keeping ourselves busy & as far away from AL as possible really helps.

          Wishing everyone a great AF Thursday!

          Lav
          AF since 03/26/09
          NF since 05/19/09
          Success comes one day at a time :thumbs:

          Comment


            Newbies Nest

            Mein Sonnenschein;1629064 wrote: I've gotten this lately as well! A good friend that I was trying to open up to, ended up telling me that he does not think I have a problem. It's crazy what some people think is normal. I KNOW that I have a problem because I prefer to drink alone, I can't stop once I've started and I constantly think about it. Every time I am in a restaurant my brain automatically goes into "wooo yeah, time to bring on an AL drink" rather than "what sounds good with what I'm eating tonight"? When I was in college, my dinner beverage of choice was Sprite and I never gave a second thought of drinking AL other than at a party. What happened to my brain?

            Sorry for my crazy rambling today. I'm just frustrated and not feeling well. We are suppose to go skiing again this weekend but my back hurts so I'm not in the mood for it at the moment. Hopefully I will feel better by Saturday.

            I know that I have been here for a long time and I should know this by now, but would you guys please share some tips that you have regarding getting through an evening alone? Lately the evening cravings are killer and that cup of tea is just not helping. The stress of my MiLs sickness is really getting to me.

            Much love and strength to you all today.

            Mein
            bottom line is that you know what it is not normal for you. In the past I've tried to justify my previous quits to friends who simply could not understand the spiraling effect AL has on me, sounds the same for you, I was
            a lone drinker as well.
            Take a breath, relax, and enjoy your quit. Once you've taken the time to reflect on the positive parts of quitting, that claw of the AL bastard will recoil. It will be there on and off but you do have the ability to tell it to go (as my mother used to say) sit on a tack.
            Liberated 5/11/2013

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              Newbies Nest

              Morning, Nesters.
              Muldoon, that was quite a day. Did you not want to say, 'OK, where is the camera, I know I'm on one of those shows!' It is just amazing what we 'see' when the AL blinders come off. There was prolly a time that the GF's behavior would have been tolerated, and the guy at the gym, and so forth, by golly, now we have STANDARDS! I'm so proud of you for hanging strong (so to speak). Now get that booze out of yer living space! We are not Mother Theresa! Great job in moving on to Day 5! We'll be mooning you on Saturday!

              Mein, I found that if I could take the emphasis off myself and do something for others it really helped. I am a cynical person by nature, and that sounds sappy even as I write it....but when I got a case of the Poor Me's the next thing I got was the Pour Me's! If you sit there and think about what you are NOT doing, it's like trying NOT to think of a blue horse. You can't do it, it's all you can see....so get busy! Do you have a pet that you could take to a nursing home for a visit? Do you bake? Can you do a craft and take it over to someone and just sit and talk to them a while? These little things can really get you over a hump. Maybe there is a support group for folks dealing with loved ones who have terminal illnesses you could join. Little Beagle has these types of meetings right in her own living room! Make things happen, it makes all the difference! I know you know these things, but a little repetition never hurt anybody, nor did a little repetition.

              I am sure my head is going to explode with snot. Tune in to the news tonight to see if NC's woman's head actually exploded from nuclear mucus. Where does all this stuff come from? And why? Sorry to complain, it's all I've got today. Hope everyone has an easy day! Distant hugs, Byrdie
              All you gotta do, is get thru this day. AF 1/20/2011
              Tool Box
              Newbie's Nest

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                Newbies Nest

                Good Morning all - I am so grateful for the messages in your posts - I made it through another night partially thanks to those messages - the night wasn't as bad as the first - but still struggled with falling asleep - I drank a bunch of sleepytime tea and sleep supplements to help - today does seem a little bit brighter - but so daunting - I have to just focus on getting through today and keep my mind busy - last night it was hard to fill the time after I got home from work - I stayed at work late and then declined going to a birthday party because it seemed to tempting and that was hard because I wanted to go and I feel bad for my friend I wasn't there - but I could not take the risk - my mind was already telling me to go and - 1 glass of wine will be fine blah blah blah - I have heard that track so many times - even thought last night was hard it felt really good to be totally present for my family - that is what I struggle with the most - guilt - its a killer - sorry to ramble on - just trying to get my mind clear to focus on getting through THIS day hour by hour - no matter what it take - and being here make me feel somewhat accountable and that is good - my anxiety is high and that is another demon for me which has always been staved away by AL - I'm have green tea - and a detox herbal tea and a big glass of water with vitamin emergency before I leave for work to get really hydrated - not a lot of appetite - is that normal ?- thanks for reading and all the words of encouragement - I am praying to get through today and tonight - and for all of you as well - I would love to support you all as well - I am grateful to be here - xx TB

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                  Newbies Nest

                  MAE all,
                  Had a thunderstorm early this morning and it melted a lot of the snow...crazy weather...
                  I could not have taken on another dog if I was still drinking. I have much more patience now. He is progressing. Ran up to me for attention this morning...it is all good.
                  Going to get him a name tag today and a few other errands before the heavens open up again and dump rain...
                  Yep 6 months on March 1st...I cant believe it....but it is true!! WooHoo!!
                  Dottie

                  Newbie's Nest

                  Tool Box
                  ____________
                  AF 9.1.2013

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                    Newbies Nest

                    Trusting Believer;1629114 wrote: Good Morning all - I am so grateful for the messages in your posts - I made it through another night partially thanks to those messages - the night wasn't as bad as the first - but still struggled with falling asleep - I drank a bunch of sleepytime tea and sleep supplements to help - today does seem a little bit brighter - but so daunting - I have to just focus on getting through today and keep my mind busy - last night it was hard to fill the time after I got home from work - I stayed at work late and then declined going to a birthday party because it seemed to tempting and that was hard because I wanted to go and I feel bad for my friend I wasn't there - but I could not take the risk - my mind was already telling me to go and - 1 glass of wine will be fine blah blah blah - I have heard that track so many times - even thought last night was hard it felt really good to be totally present for my family - that is what I struggle with the most - guilt - its a killer - sorry to ramble on - just trying to get my mind clear to focus on getting through THIS day hour by hour - no matter what it take - and being here make me feel somewhat accountable and that is good - my anxiety is high and that is another demon for me which has always been staved away by AL - I'm have green tea - and a detox herbal tea and a big glass of water with vitamin emergency before I leave for work to get really hydrated - not a lot of appetite - is that normal ?- thanks for reading and all the words of encouragement - I am praying to get through today and tonight - and for all of you as well - I would love to support you all as well - I am grateful to be here - xx TB
                    You are doing such a great job! I'm pulling for you, Believer! Just get some days behind you no matter what it takes. It gets easier and easier once you've proven to yourself that you can avoid various triggers.
                    You had the power all along, my dear.

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                      Newbies Nest

                      You are doing great TB. I find that Kudzu and L-Glutamine helps with cravings. Also the Homeopathic by Hylands called Calms helps a little with anxiety (and b vitamins and magnesium.) Check and see if something nutritional might help you too.

                      We've all depleted our bodies something awful. A little loving care might help you feel better and more positive!

                      Your doing great!

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                        Newbies Nest

                        Hi All, thanks for the encouragement, suggestions and support. They are all good! I need to make a list of things I can do in the evenings.

                        Just a quick check-in before I have to start packing for the weekend. We are driving back to Switzerland tonight for our last ski weekend before spring skiing season begins. How nice it is to wake up early and get out to the slopes without a hangover. Once in CO, I actually threw up on a beautiful hill full of moguls... I'm sure all of the AL I had the day before had something to do with it. Ugh. Not anymore. Now I can safely ski the slopes without any AL in my system. Going to remain strong this time.

                        I'm off to packing. I wish you all a day of love and strength. :l
                        Would you like you, if you met you?

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                          Newbies Nest

                          I haven't been able to post the last couple days, but I wanted to stop in to say "Hi" for my 99th in case I don't get on tomorrow. I usually post over in the roll call topic and browse this one. I'm in Las Vegas so I don't have too much internet time, but for anyone who's been here, or may be going here, and is worried because we know how easy it is to find alcohol here, know that I was a little surprised at was how incredibly easy it is to find non-alcoholic beer. They have it at all the bars, and even the beverage servers at the casinos will bring one. No one bats an eye if you ask either, they seem pretty used to it actually. The choices seem to be limited to O'doulls or Sharps, but I did find an Irish pub at NYNY that serves Kaliber, my favorite. Anyway, I'm doing great and will do my best to stop in tomorrow for my 100th. Have a great day everyone!
                          11/5/2014

                          [moon] [guy] [shout] [two] [horse] [three] [rockon] [worthy] [spin] [allgood] [two] [dancin] [shout] [baby] [fist] [celebrate] [dancin] [rockon] [welldone] [bouncy] [applause2] [dancing] [lucky] [worthy] [llama] [shout] [horn] [three] [applause] [hyper] [dancegirl] [black] [bumpit] [sohappy] [horse] inkele: :applause2: :yay:

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                            Newbies Nest

                            Hey Folks Another wake up with no hangover--Love it!

                            Each morning I ask myself.."what?...small thing will you do today to enhance your recovery?"

                            Well.....Im gonna do four little things and enjoy every minute of the day.

                            I totally agree that we must INVEST in our recovery...its starting to become fun...Why?....CUZ.....Im no longer missing AL but rather looking forward to being clean and green.

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                              Newbies Nest

                              lead366;1629167 wrote:

                              Each morning I ask myself.."what?...small thing will you do today to enhance your recovery?"
                              Good question lead! Think I will incorporate it into my plan. Thanks.

                              Comment


                                Newbies Nest

                                Hi All, I'm brand new here and not sure where to post? In a new Thread? or replies, not sure what is appropriate but I'm sure I'll figure it out.

                                I'm a mom, 45, binge drinker but its gotten so much worse in the last couple years. And my kids, 10 & 14 have seen too much and understand. I know I need to do this for them, I got that, so why can't I just stop???? Its like some other person takes over and I'm on the verge of losing everything important to me, family, friends, my husband (2nd marriage) and children's respect. Yesterday has to be the last day I ever drink, but I have no idea how to make that happen with any certainty. My husband is at the end of his tolerance and is so mad at my continued bad choices he doesn't have much faith when I say I'm going to stop. I'm way past the "help me" stage, he needs to see me make an effort to help myself and fix the relationship I've been slowly breaking down. I have no idea why I do what I do. Why do I take that first drink when I know i can't stop. I keep telling myself 'this time will be different' and fail and fail and fail.

                                I need help before I hurt my children, emotionally, any further, or hurt myself accidentally when I do strange stupid things I don't remember. Yep, its bad.

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