Newbies Nest

[Lavande]

Newbies Nest

Good evening Nesters,

I've had a busy but good day with my daughter & granddaughter, they are staying overnight as well

Ava, I hope you have a great day & are proud of your accomplishment! Congrats again

Pauly & Dot, it takes some real AF time to rewire your brain but it will happen provided you remain AF. There soon will be a time where your automatic default doesn't immediately go to thoughts of AL. Hang in there

Wishing everyone a safe & cozy night in the nest!

Lav

[Pavati]

Newbies Nest

Ava - a lovely 90 day post! I'm right behind you - see you in two days for my party.

Dottie - stay strong or Ava will have to come kick your arse. I am sorry for your day, but it WILL get better. It will get better without AL!

Jane - I could have written your list - in fact it was good to read that others feel like that sometimes, too. I looked back at some such lists I had written when hungover, however, and they all include the word fear. At least my list now doesn't have that word... I hope you both feel better soon, Dot and Jane.

Byrdie - SHART! Heh. Oh, my. My son calls that particular happenstance "shotgun." I never asked why...

OK, folks. Good night from this part of the nest. More rain in the forecast - you must have been doing a lot of that nekkid rain dancing, K9. Keep it up!

xo
Pav

[Sarah42]

Newbies Nest

Thanks for asking Byrdie. I'm disappointed to say I didn't go AF today. I have, however, maintained my taper. IDK why really. Again, for me I think it's more about habit than the need for AL..cause I was on the computer doing stuff I normally do and ready to change the TV to the news, and it's like my mind said "it's 5:00!". I restrained for around 30-40 minutes or so and then life just started happening around me (family needing this or that, blah blah), and I read before that you shouldn't do this when you are alone, and my hubby scheduled a hunting trip on Mon/Tues so I guess that was my brain's excuse of thinking "maybe I should wait until after that". I suppose the truth of the matter is, after a good nights sleep last night... I wasn't as angry...and therefore, less determined. Fear, I suppose, also set in today. Not only just being 'without' but also the underlying thought of what it might do to my body having our disease.

I know these are empty excuses I'm telling myself (or my alkie brain is), but it's important to tell the truth.

Tearfully, I say I'm so very proud of each and every one of you for going day 1 on up to hundreds of days or more. I DO want to be there and share that with you all, however, it's pretty obvious to me that I'm not quite ready to 'jump in'.

Yes, I am disappointed, but I'm not giving up.

[DreamThinkDo]

Newbies Nest

MAE Nesters

Sorry all, missed you yesterday. Hope the caffeine withdrawal wasn't too bad



I'll have to read back...

Have a lovely AF POETS day!

[Petrelhead]

Newbies Nest

Hi all.

It's been an horrific past 24 hours for me, but all's well that ends well. More of that soon.

Ava: congrats on 90 days. Awesome. That is my first goal and you are my immediate hero. You show such fortitude. You say it like it is. No BS!. And you are very supportive of others here, like all long termers here. Thank you Ava and others. And Ava, the fact that you display the strength to continue ploughing through. You're a example for the rest of us in our early days. Thank you.

So much has happened in the nest in the last night, about 24 hours ago ( to the very minute) I recieved a phone call from my 16 YO son. I let him go to a friends place to watch a movie. He was heading home and someone he didn't know well offered him a lift. It turns out this other kid only had a learners license. He'd also had 2 beers. So he was wrong on all counts.

This other kid started speeding to show off. My son asked him to slow down, but too late, he braked on a gravel road, lost control and slammed into a power pole, knocked it over and brought down the power lines. Every parents nightmare. Fortunately, it was a modern car, the airbags deployed and both stepped out relatively unhurt. Minor bruises from the seatbelt and shock.

He phoned me immediately and said he was okay. So I didn't have that uncertain period of hearing about it, and not knowing how they were. I drove straight down and he was okay, much to my relief. He could have been killed, or badly hurt.

A neighbor approached me and said after she heard the crash from her house, and came out and saw the car, she expected them to be dead.

From this, I realized if this happened last week, I would have over the limit to drive. I would have felt like a fool to not be there for my son. But as it was, I was sober, was able to be with my son as he was giving a statement to the police. That, in it self makes me never want to drink, if I'm going to be a responsible parent. I was able to be with him at the hospital for observations, and then drive him home in the early hours of the morning.

It was an awful thing that happened, but he's okay. He did nothing wrong, except a error in judgement in accepting the ride when he should have known better. The driver is in huge trouble with the police and the damage he's caused. But at least he's okay.

That was a hell of a thing to happen in my first serious attempt at long term sobriety. A lesson for me, and hopefully my son.

Well, I'm at the end of day 5, my dreaded Friday night, and it's turned out to be different than expected, but a good result in the end.

Thanks for listening everyone, and I hope everyone is going well in their quest.

[available]

Newbies Nest

Oh Petrel so glad your son is okay. Every parents worst nightmare. I used to drive my kids nuts ringing them up and checking on them but that was more because i was pissed, god only knows what i would have done if any had been in trouble. My son is at a Sound Wave concert today and i so hope he is ok. god he is 20 but he is my baby, well they all are. Good on him for asking for your help and ringing you straight away. A great relationship of father and son also.

So proud of you also for being sober, stressed, worried, anxious, scared, uncertain and you got through it all AF. A big hug from me on that one and totally decided your friday night on what to do other than drinking.

I dont think young kids that drive realise the dangers of driving. I work in a trauma hospital and to see the car accident patients, mainly young with brain injuries is heartbreaking and more so for the parents. I thank god everyday my children made it to adulthood.

Thanks for the congrats, i have been smiling all day and it has been well worth the effort i must say but dont get me waffling on again!

Always here to listen and 2 days till the whole 7 days are done. woo hoo

[Petrelhead]

Newbies Nest

Thanks Ava. Yes very relieved. I'm a little shaken still, perhaps more so that I'm finally winding down for the day, and I'm now reliving what happened and what could have been. No airbags, would have been terrible. I can't even imagine.

Yes, so friday night has been entirely different than what I expected. I'm so shaken. I've never been a person who's wanted alcohol when stressed by something like this. Al was more of a way to look for fun.

So another AF day has been easy. My sons and I went and bought snacks I wouldn't normally eat (I think what we're all trying to achieve must give us some license to indulge a little in other ways) and we watched a movie. I think I will run in the morning.

Thanks again Ava!!

[Lavande]

Newbies Nest

Good morning Nesters,

Petrel, I am happy to hear your son is OK!
My daughter totaled my car when she was 17, driving with a friend & didn't see the car in front of them stop suddenly. That truly is a terrible feeling when your child is involved in an accident but such a blessing when they are unhurt

My daughter & granddaughter stayed overnight & are sleeping in this morning.
These wonderful visits would not be happening if I was still hugging a wine bottle ~ believe me when I say I am grateful

Sarah, jump in when you are ready, no time like the present. We'll be here to help!

Wishing everyone a wonderful AF Friday! It's just another day, not an excuse to drink, right?

Lav

[Petrelhead]

Newbies Nest

Lav, thanks for your thoughts. I'm glad you're daughter got through okay. I'm still counting our blessings.

Well, it's Late Friday night under the nest here! Having my last Cup of chamomile and bed very soon. Survived day 5

[Petrelhead]

Newbies Nest

Jane, thank you. I'm actually his dad. There are plenty of us good dads too. But thank you!!

[Cocoflo]

Newbies Nest

Good Morning,

Petrel, thank goodness your son is fine! What a scary experience. It must feel so good to know that you were sober and present when he needed you.

Sarah, making the final step to actually stop is hard. I have always had an excuse, a wedding, holiday, vacation, 1st of the month, after the weekend, hard day at work, etc. I'm glad you are able to taper, for me, one drink always leads to many, many more. It must take so much discipline and will power! Hoping you can join us soon on day one af.

Jane, I feel the same way, "It is totally insidious, and I'm pissed that it has taken up so much time and space in my life." Sounds like you are feeling better today. One of the things that I am trying to keep in mind is that there will be ups and downs in life, drinking does not make that go away. I just need to get through the feelings and challenges, no matter how difficult or painful they may be.

Best to all!
cocoflo

[Mein Sonnenschein]

Newbies Nest

Hi All, it's a cold afternoon here in Germany. Feeling sleepy and down so I'm snuggled in a blanket on the couch. No AL in the house (thank God) and I got rid of all of the junk food. Now there are only healthy options at home. I was struggling at step aerobics last night and I know that part of it was the fact that I had not eaten well that day. Ugh, wishing for a drink at the same time feeling sick at the though of AL. It's all part of the process, right?!

[Stupot]

Newbies Nest

Petrel - that sounds very frightening re your son, thank goodness it all turned out ok. Bet that other kid learned his lesson (well, I hope so anyway) the hard way.
Jane - that song you describe is by Lady Antebellum. I love that track but the words get me every time.
MS - I hear ya re feeling sleepy and down, wanting yet not wanting AL.
I am feeling very sorry for myself today, I must admit. I am unhappy in my workplace and just feel so so lonely generally (also hormonal, sorry, TMI!). I don't even particularly want to drink today, I am just sick of it being such a BIG thing in my head. Actually, today I am just sick of everything. Bring on March 1st!!

[Byrdlady]

Newbies Nest

Good Morning, Nesters!
Well, here's the good news! In the early going, you will never have 2 bad days in a row! Don't ask me why, but it is a merciful phenomenon. I guess once you fight a big battle one day, there is a victorious feeling the next? Whatever it is, I'll take it. I still find that to be the case. When I'm throwing and attending a pity party, the next day, it is a distant memory! (could be a female thing....)
Petrol, your story from last night brings a flood of emotions. I am so thankful that your son and his friend emerged with only the lesson. While it was a tough one, I hope it will be a lasting one (for all). You have a second chance at everything! Can't you just see it playing out totally differently? When I was 13, my 17 year old brother was on his way to work with 2 friends (16 and 18). My brother was driving and for some reason (NOT AL related) his car veered over 2 lanes of traffic and hit an army truck head on. All 3 were killed instantly. My life has really never been the same since that Dec 7, 1972. My family literally died that day....all of the life was taken out when we lost my brother. You have such an opportunity to rewrite history here! Cherish every single day of life you have! You have been given the ultimate Re-Do! Run with it. I'm so relieved for you! Stay the course and you will never be sorry! You have a guardian angel!

Today is just Friday, not a free pass to Boozeville! Treat it just like any other day! Tomorrow you will be so happy you did. Stay active in the nest if you feel you need some help....there are 7 years to draw on this thread alone! Have a great day, all! xo, Byrdie

[Rahulthesweet]

Newbies Nest

Hello Nesters, day 7 evening goong out with friends normally in this situation I used to drink but no sir not today. Am I feelibg sad or missing out somthing ... no sir !!

I have to treat AL like an Ex girl friend or lost love... you cant hate or love ... cant have it ... who will be around but not with you.

Will I stay sober tonight ... yes I will ... will I miss out on life ? Lets see ...


have a nice sober evening or day where ever you all are.