Newbies Nest

[bran new day]

Newbies Nest

Hi Everyone , I am away from home at the moment working so I don't have the time to read back [ and theres a lot of reading for a few days away ] I'll catch up with that next week .
I'm holding up well , as away was usually when Al came out to play .
Stay well . BND .

[bran new day]

Newbies Nest

Hi Everyone , I am away from home at the moment working so I don't have the time to read back [ and theres a lot of reading for a few days away ] I'll catch up with that next week .
I'm holding up well , as away was usually when Al came out to play .
Stay well . BND .

[daisy45]

Newbies Nest

Reporting in on day 5. This was a tough start but feeling better. Heading off for my first gym session in 2 weeks. Going to take it easier this time - put too much preasure on myself last time to get it right; so much so that when I missed out on one part of my plan, I felt so bad and it all came tumbling down.......haven't been perfect ever so I must not expect to be just because I am sober! Aaaah......

[Lavande]

Newbies Nest

Good morning Nesters,

Going to be a dark & rainy day around my part of the nest - better than snow

daisy, glad to hear you are taking one step at a time & being kind to yourself

Wishing everyone a great AF Hump day!

Lav

[KENSHO]

Newbies Nest

Good morning y'all. Made it through. Feeling tired today, though I slept well. Eating a lot is helping... bread, croissants, candy, and I'm craving salt and protein. It does help to be full and not deny much at this point. I think part of the reason I've been drinking is to get through the incredible schedule I have set up for myself. Trying to be superwoman - great at everything. Maybe it's time to give myself a break and allow some down time so I don't have to numb my way through the evenings. I'll have a plan for today in a bit... finding that it helps a lot to have a plan for each day, because the list of challenges is so different. Love to you all for the shout outs last night. I needed them. Not sure why you feel compelled to help a stranger like me, and I hope I can return the favor some day. :h

[Byrdlady]

Newbies Nest

Kensho, well done! The short answer to your ponderable there at the end of your post is this... we ARE you. Each and every one of us flew in afraid of what the future would hold. NONE of us knew each other prior to coming here. Lav was here for me... she encouraged me when I was doing well and corrected me when I was not. I owe that woman MY LIFE. We are all merely paying forward what was done for us....and I'm sure you will do the same...and so it goes. Freedom from AL addiction is amazing, but it is a skill like anything else, the more you practice it the better you get. With the one day under your belt, you can build from that and with each passing day, you get stronger and the addiction gets weaker. It's a wonderful thing.

Where I kept messing up is that I'd get a few days under my belt (drinking joke) and think I had this thing beat! Then I'd give back in to it, and with each time I did I sunk lower and lower and AL's pull got stronger! If you can imagine how a starving person might be when they are rescued and then taken to the buffet line at the Golden Corral, it was a lot like that...each time I tried to quit after that became HARDER because I had the mind chatter that I COULD beat this thing anytime I wanted to...except that I couldn't. So you are absolutely doing the right thing in reinforcing your plan for Day 2. It's a very important day in the journey! It comes down to Psychology 101. What makes us feed quarters into a slot machine in Lost Wages (Las Vegas)? It's that occasional HIT we make. That is what creates the mad fool that will LOSE $200 to get $5! AL is just like that, when we give back in to it, that part of our brain gets POSITIVE reinforcement so trying to break that pattern again gets more difficult. It took me a YEAR to catch on to what I was doing to myself (but I am thick headed, you are smart!!).

I've been on this site a little over 4 years. The people that get this on the first try really are the smartest people I can imagine and they deserve all the prizes in the Prize Closet. I see the serial relapsers (and I was one of them) just going thru hell on Earth trying to shake this thing...it really IS an awful cycle to be in. So if there is ONE piece of advice I can offer to anyone reading this....get quit and STAY quit! Protect your quit as if it were a pot of gold! Maintaining the days you have is 1000 times easier than starting over and yes, I could write a book on that one. The discomfort of a few hours (or minutes) during a craving is peanuts to pay if it will keep you out of the rabbit hole. Fight those cravings with all you've got. You CAN win! Do NOT give in, no matter who...no matter what! Your quit is priority #1, everything else can wait.

Have a great day everyone! Make it count! XO, Byrdie

[frances]

Newbies Nest

Hi all! Met a friend yesterday evening -I told her in advance that I would not be drinking. I did not get into details when we talked about it; I just said that I needed a break after drinking daily and too many drinks on most days. Why I couldn't just come out and say I don't drink anymore....I don't know. In any case - I did not drink with her - she bought a bottle of wine but had two glasses and took the rest home with her. We had a nice visit and I did not feel at all like I was missing out, which was a surprise. I really think planning and thinking everything through ahead of time has been a tremendous help to me on the three social occasions I have encountered since going AF. It's not that I always only drank socially - I drank always - socially, not socially, every day and so really any occasion, just the sun setting, is a risky occasion for me! But I thought the social occasions might be harder and they've gone very well so far. It has surprised me that noone cares that I'm not drinking, as long as they can still have theirs lol!

Great job Kensho - keep up the good work!

[Byrdlady]

Newbies Nest

I was looking thru some old posts....this one is worth putting up again!
From Patrick on 12/10/12

THIS IS MY QUIT(ALCOHOLICS CREED)


I was watching Full Metal Jacket lately and the riflemans creed made me think of this.Sorry if its corny.

This is my Quit.
There are many like it but this one is mine.
My Quit is my best friend. It is my life. I must master it as I master my life.
My Quit without me is useless. Without my Quit I am useless. I must keep my Quit true.
I must be stronger than my enemy who is trying to kill me. I must kill him before he kills me.
I will.
My Quit and I know that what counts in this war is not the empty promises we make, the bullshit we tell ourselves and others, or the false dawns that we tell ourselves "this time its for good. It is the Quit that counts. WE WILL QUIT.
My Quit is human, even as I, because it is my life. Thus, I will learn it as a brother ,its strengths and its weaknesses, its moods ,its ups and its downs.
I will keep my Quit clean and ready even as I am clean and ready. We will become part of each other. We will...
I swear this creed. My Quit and I are the defenders of my family. We are the masters of our enemy. We are the saviors of my life.
So be it until victory is mine and there is no enemy.
Only peace.

[NoSugar]

Newbies Nest

KENSHO;1639454 wrote: I think part of the reason I've been drinking is to get through the incredible schedule I have set up for myself. Trying to be superwoman - great at everything. Maybe it's time to give myself a break and allow some down time so I don't have to numb my way through the evenings.

Hi, Kensho. We were just talking about this on another thread. I'll repeat here some of what I wrote.

I cocooned for quite awhile after I quit and other than meeting personal and professional responsibilities, pretty much only did what I wanted to do.

The only thing you have to do right now and for as long as necessary is not drink. Everything else should support that and if it doesn't, just skip it for now.

It is pretty amazing how many things I thought I had to do but believe it or not, the world kept turning when I didn't...
The perfect superwoman thing is a myth anyway and really, no one really likes or can become close to someone who seemingly has no problems - because that person isn't human. We're all imperfect -- and that's ok.

Good job, Frances on enjoying yourself without drinking. My friends now order my soda water and lime for me when they order their bottle of wine. It is really nice .

Day 1 is the WORST Nesters. Once you gain it, don't give it up for anything. As Byrdie explained, they just get harder and harder.

All the best, NS

[summering]

Newbies Nest

Am having terrible dreams ..when does this stop ?

[NoSugar]

Newbies Nest

You DO have a way with words, Jane. I love this :H:

That's it in selfish news from the bitch and moan zone.

.

I hope you feel better all over soon!

[NoSugar]

Newbies Nest

One of the MWOers who helped me so much, FallenAngel, happened to send me this quote today and it is a great one for the Nest:

"If you're tired of starting over, stop giving up." - Unknown

[Dottie Belle]

Newbies Nest

Hi all,
Day 200 and I so cant believe this. I too was a serial day 1 person. Years and years I tried to control and just drink on the weekends etc but it was just a mess...this time stuck and I think it was a number of things coming together. This place for sure was a help with all the great support and wisdom. To all the newbies I can honestly say this is doable and if I can do this you can too!!

[New Dreams]

Newbies Nest

MAE nesters

Hi Jane, so sorry for your loss, we lost one of our feline family this past year & she is still missed.

Luvin, great to hear from you...we're zeroing in on 3 weeks!

200 days Dottie ...WOW!

Thanks Pav, BL, Lav & all of the senior community that works so hard to keep us focused & on track!

Thanks to everyone in the nest...having a community to be with on this journey is blessing. :thanks:

Grateful for a beautiful spring day!

[KENSHO]

Newbies Nest

Today.

Apologies if the "my plan" post gets repetitive. It seems more real to me if I post it onto the pages of the universe. Ignore if you wish!

TODAY:
- keep those supplements up
- read up on hypnosis cds that I've been avoiding and make a plan to start.
- make a reasonable list of client to-do's and do them
- Allow myself to feel tired and blah.
- sweat - this always makes me feel better (do this at 3:30 pm - hard time)
- Immed. after exercise, leave to get kiddos. Do not stop at store, do not collect booze.
- Immed. after arriving home, light essential oils for calming and balancing, and pour a seltzer with a fresh orange twist for me and kids - toast to 3 things we are each greatful for.
- have kids help make taco night dinner
- DO NOT FEEL SORRY FOR YOURSELF. This is your choice, and you can weather the storm. Stay positive.
- Look forward to 9pm when the cravings stop and I can take a bath (with hubby?)
- Look forward to tomorrow morning when I can post on roll call and buy those damn sunglasses!

Yesterday my daughter (4 yrs. old) asked me why I wasn't drinking wine. I told her it was "because we don't need to drink grown up drinks..." and my 8 yr. old son finished my sentence "... every night. It's bad for you." I had no idea he was paying attention or that he knew this. Love that kid!