Newbies Nest

[Pavati]

Newbies Nest

Morning, all, from a rainy (hooray, we needed it!) part of the nest.

I, too, have joint pain that I didn't have before. Hmmm, maybe we're on to something. Call Johns Hopkins!

Kensho - stay strong, and definitely check in here if you need.

Welcome back Kailey and Gardener - great that you have each other. You've shown you can do this. I recommend staying close to MWO even when you're feeling strong. Having a sober community is a key part of avoiding relapse.

My plan is to try to clean up some, hang out with my family and maybe catch a movie. Very low key which I need after the last couple of weeks.

Happy Sober Saturday, nest!

[Byrdlady]

Newbies Nest

I just cleaned off 10 years of hairspray from my bathroom floor, walls and door. Yuck.

Welcome back, Gardener! Stick close! My hubs actually left me because of my drinking and he still does not totally understand the whole alcoholic thing! I think it hurts his ego because his wife is an alkie. Oh well, I certainly didn't plan this, I am as appalled as he is. But as long as I don't drink, I don't show symptoms, so all is good. I am so glad you came back, you know this is the place to be if you are serious about getting sober.

I should do a poll on this topic.... as nesters, you know I always say that nobody ever started drinking again and were glad of it. No one! That's pretty powerful when you think about it. We have nearly 3000 visitors on this site a day....if you stick around for any amount of time, you see the stories over and over again....the moral is this: protect your quit as tho your life depends on it! It does! It is 1000 times easier to maintain your quit than to start over! I can tell you this from bitter experience! Zero Tolerance, Non-negotiable, No How, No way! A dam drink is NOT worth the misery it causes!

Went out last night with 2 other couples, once again, I was the only one not drinking. No one said a word about it. They all also ordered fish and chips and I don't eat seafood so I'm an odd duck anyway. It's ok to be unique!! I bet I was the only one who didn't wake up with a big head this morning! Besides, I already drank my share.

Keep strong, everyone! We are all here together! xxoo, Byrdie

[glorialagos]

Newbies Nest

newbie here

:new:

Once again, I am trying to find the cure for my drinking. I have tried over and over again and it gets more difficult every time. I once had almost 3 years AF and then blew it. Since then I have had 5 months a couple times but I can't seem to just totally give it up. It seems that AL has such a hold on me and just drags me back every time I almost get away. I just turned 50. Wow, that was hard to write!! I don't feel that old and seem younger - I hope. I have tried to quit for almost 20 years. I have been a problem drinker since the very first sip when I was 17! I always drink to get drunk. I have never been a "normie". Anyway, I need someone to join me on this journey. Any non-drinking pals out there who are starting today or in the last couple days? I would love to have a partner to help me.

I am glad to be here. I will be successful this time. I have to!:thanks:

[NoSugar]

Newbies Nest

Welcome, Gloria

You've come to a great place for the support we all need to get this done. Weekends sometimes are quiet so maybe you could read back several pages and get to know the people who are posting here. Despite our differences, our core problems are the same so advice that has been offered to others may be just what you need to hear.

Since you've done this before, you know what it takes but need to add in some tools to prevent from happening whatever has derailed you in the past. Do you know what did it and what you plan to do differently this time? A link to the toolbox is given below - it is full of ideas for you to consider.

Glad you've joined us! :welcome::welcome::welcome:

[available]

Newbies Nest

MAE nesters

Gloria the only cure for drinking is not to drink. As a dear friend says on here "i dont have a quit lef in me to drink again". Never a truer word is said now i dont drink. The hardest part is stopping and as you know the rest gets easier. Happy birthday for your 50th, i turn 50 in April, had a few moments thinking about that big number but i am totally grateful that i actually have made it to 50. When i think about what i have put into my body over those years i am pleased i am still alive. Keep on here, there are always newbies around. My fellow quit buddy and i are celebrating 120 days, oh that would be today for me! I am proud beyond belief of what i have achieved and my life is so much better in every single way without pouring al down my throat. You can do this Gloria and you know how good it feels.

Well today is my:

120 days can be converted to one of these units:

10,368,000 seconds
172,800 minutes
2880 hours
120 days
17 weeks (rounded down)

Damn i love the date/time calculator.

Time to pack!

[Tyandra]

Newbies Nest

Hello,

I just joined and wanted to say hi. This seems like the right thread to do that? I want to moderate my drinking but am realizing that I will probably have to stop completely. I can't seem to do moderation. I've tried to be a weekend only drinker and can be for a couple weeks but then it goes right back to 3x a week, 4x, 5x then back to everyday. My most recent plan is to be a restaurant only drinker and only drink wine with dinner and not continue when I come home but I know I'm fooling myself with that idea.

When I am sober during the weekdays and am exercising everyday, I feel fantastic - like I'm on top of the world! When I drink, I feel like crap and I go through the entire day slogging through my responsibilities, cursing myself for drinking so much the night before. Then I start all over again with that first drink while cooking dinner. I feel so good when I don't drink but after about 3 days I start thinking about drinking and I start craving it and then day 4 is harder. . . etc.

I'm also married to an alcoholic who drinks every night without missing a night ever. He has no plans to quit and doesn't want to. This makes it even harder but I know that I can do this. I really want to LIVE my life and I can't do that with alcohol. I know this, but I can't seem to stop drinking longer than 5 days!

:new:

[Petrelhead]

Newbies Nest

Hi tyandra and welcome. You are definitely in the right place. I was in your shoes just over 34 days ago.

You'll get lots of great advice and fantastic support on this forum, and particularly the newbies nest. I think each individual's plan has to be your own. For me, to tell yourself " I no longer drink, not ever" is a big pill to swallow. After several half hearted attempts to give Al a break, I was inspired to quit for 3 months. I knew I could do that, and it was a "bite size goal".


Well, I'm over 1 month into that, and it's going well. At the end of 3 months, who knows. I'm enjoying the AF (alcohol free) life so much now, I'm not in a hurry to drink again. Maybe never.

I'm planning to run my first marathon in July, so will now push my AF period to 4.5 months, most likely.

Most importantly, success or some small failures along the way, STICK AROUND!!. Keep posting. There are so many wonderful people on here who will support you and this is a very powerful environment to quit drinking!

[Gardener]

Newbies Nest

Thanks for the warm welcome back you guys, Available, congrats on your 120 days - you and I quit on your Day 1 together and I fell off more than once, kudos to you, that's a great accomplishment!

Byrdie and Lav, you have no idea how many times you have both inspired me with your tough, no nonsense, but caring messages, thank you so much for your participation on this site, I sometimes quote you guys to Dickhead!

Kairos, and Gloria - let's rack up some days, I'm all in - we can do this! One thing that helps is learning every time you pick yourself up again - never stop trying.

Little B, I feel like I've let you down, I know I haven't been very responsive to you and you've been with me for a good while with your checking in on me. I'll stay close this time.

Looking forward to getting to know all the new folks here. Have a great Saturday all!

[Petrelhead]

Newbies Nest

Ava, congrat's on the 120 days! What you just said about grateful for making it to 50 is a great reminder to appreciate a good life we have , and to reinforce the great decision to not drink. That alone (the decision not to drink) could only enhance that gift of life, which I guess at our stage in life is a really smart decision.

I hope your bags are packed and you're ready to shop!

[available]

Newbies Nest

Thanks Garden and glad to see you posting, one major task for me daily is to check in twice at least and read and post even if it is just a hello, which for me is never as i always have something to say. In the early days it was just getting through one day at a time and telling myself each day, 1000 times if necessary that i would not drink and distracting myself from those al thoughts. I think we get to that stage where we are just "over it" with drinking, i know i was, so i had to give it my best shot so to speak. Had a chuckle at "dickhead", just concentrate on yourself, he will change and if not does it matter at the end of the day. You know you cant drink and that is all that matters. Give him the "baby evils" when he starts on at you and walk away.

Yes Petrel now my head is not firmly stuck in a bottle i appreciate so much more daily, even if it is the birds first thing in the morning waking me up. Before i wanted to shoot the bastards as i was so hungover! My first hungover birthday will be 50 and really for me it is like being born again not having al in my life daily, i actually have a life and i am happy i am well on my way to being up with Lav and Byrd. It has not been easy at all but well worth it. I hope to be smoke free also by my 50th. My kids say i am getting boring, no party animal mum but they love the new me. Bag will be packed today and i dont want to pack much so leaving it to the last minute. last time i bought back 40kgs with shopping and never used half the stuff i took. If i pack nothing i can buy oh so much. Ta for the congrats, today is a good day, sun is shining and birds are not dead!

Tyandra welcome to the Nest, your story sounds so much like mine, i hit that repeat button so many times it became a joke at the end of the day. Take one day at a time so you are not overwhelmed, eat whatever you want, sleep when you feel tired, nuture yourself for a week and think of you. I cant imagine how hard it will be with dh drinking but at the end of the day it is your choice and decision not to drink. I too got those thoughts of al after a few days of detoxing but we know we cant have one drink, an alcoholic cant moderate, an alcoholic can never have one drink and i am an alcoholic.

[frances]

Newbies Nest

Hi Ty - what you said: "I've tried to be a weekend only drinker and can be for a couple weeks but then it goes right back to 3x a week, 4x, 5x then back to everyday. My most recent plan is to be a restaurant only drinker and only drink wine with dinner and not continue when I come home but I know I'm fooling myself with that idea." This is exactly me. And you can see from my join date (2008) that I've been trying this for awhile. I am on day 32 today and feeling really good - hoping this time will be the last. Working on accepting the fact that I cannot moderate and I therefore I cannot drink. It is not easy to accept but I know it is true.

I wish you all the best and look forward to seeing your posts and hearing about your progress!

[KENSHO]

Newbies Nest

Well, here I go! To the dinner (aka wine dinner). I have my "special" water and am armed with a few good one liners, including "FO Voice, not tonight", "I've worked too hard to ruin it in one night", and a few others. The past few days I ate candy and crap. Made me feel too yucky. So I was back to juicing, vegies and protein today. I will be sure to eat a lot, but I will focus more on the medium-good-for-you-stuff! Feeling strong, which is really good for me at 3:30. Typically I'm already fighting it a bit. Have a great Sat. night all!

[Byrdlady]

Newbies Nest

Welcome, Gloria and Tyandra!!! Good to see you Pepper and Gardener!

Available, wow! 120 days! We are all so proud of you!!!! Please accept this small token of our admiration:
:dancin:

We are dancing with joy over your 4 months!! I, for one, always look forward to reading your posts and your thoughtful responses. You have come a long way! Keep up the great work! I hate that our paths had to cross on an internet site for problem drinkers, but it is a privilege to be on this journey with you!

Stay strong, Kensho! Holla if you need us!!
Byrdie

[Dottie Belle]

Newbies Nest

WTG Available...You have done a great job!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[peppersnow]

Newbies Nest

Day 7 down for me.

Kensho - I'm also having to go out tonight. A work-related splashy dinner with lots of wine (free) and I have no choice about attending as required by my job, and people are used to me being the life of the party. Not drinking will stick out but I don't feel like explaining myself just yet. So here's what I did - a friend was going to drive (maybe because she knows I usually drink a lot) but I flipped the table and said I'd drive instead, so that was my first strategy. Second strategy was that we have an empty seat at our table, so I convinced my teenaged daughter to join me. She's excited about getting dressed up and will be my inspiration to stick to sparkling water.

Best of luck and hope your dinner goes well!