Newbies Nest

[Luckyflower]

Newbies Nest

Pavati - Wanted to congratulate you on 120 days. Big achievement. I hope that you are very proud of yourself. I thank you for all your support and inspiring posts.:goodjob::yougo:

[KENSHO]

Newbies Nest

Dream...

Thank you guys. Making it tonight. Still have to work, but I think I will find a way to surf the web in bed, instead of feeling isolated at my desk. Try to make it fun and then say screw it. Not having to work every night has given me something to look forward to.

I totally forgot to share a dream that I had last night. I was at a house in the mountains. I was with a friend. There were two bears, and somehow they cornered us. My friend went quickly to the front door, and one bear followed her - she got in. I went around the wall, and saw the other bear. It saw me. A grizzly - and it wanted me. It began to charge me and I had a brief moment to decide what I was going to do. I looked behind me at the deck door, and wondered if I would be able to run there, get in and close it. I looked in front of me and saw a pair of scissors on the deck steps. I stared at the bear for a second and then decided to pick up the scissors.

I awoke with a racing heart. Immediately, I thought the bear to be alcohol, and I was deciding to fight, instead of run. I also looked up the meaning of bears and fighting them in dreams, and first thing I found was this...

"In her book, "The Dreamer's Dictionary," Condron translates the dream image of animals as habits. Because bears are animals that exist in the wild, they typically indicate an untamed habit the dreamer may have, she explains."
- Barbara Condron, B.J., D.D., D.M., author of two dozen dream-related books

Hmmmmm. Someone up there communicating with me??

Thanks again for the support tonight. I thought it was getting easier. Can't let the guard down even for a little bit!

[Icanwithoutacan]

Newbies Nest

Congrats pavati :wd:

[Pavati]

Newbies Nest

MAE, all:

Thanks for the good wishes. It does feel great to chalk up those days. Slow and fast at the same time (right, NoSugar??)

Kensho - I LOVE dreams, scary, fun, weird, whatever - but I especially love them when they are so absolutely straightforward like that. Very cool.

I'm off to bed - I recommend doing what Byrdie and Lav say - they're always right. Hang tight, everyone. I am here to say 120 days in that it truly does get better. Life being free from the chains of alcohol is an amazing thing.

xo
Pav

[DreamThinkDo]

Newbies Nest

White rabbits! And happy April Fool's Day :H - the cyber gods played their own joke on me by mislaying my post somewhere.

Fresh coffee, anybody?


Kensho, you're so right about not letting your guard down, but after a while it does get easier to shift yourself into autopilot mode. (And see below for really good advice on sugar:H:H)

Jim, anything is better than Al, and that's why I don't worry too much about the sweet things that I now eat much more often then before. I think I'm one of those people whose sugar habit was masked by Al; I'm working hard to get back back into a more SF way of eating, but the occasional slip doesn't bother me. I can think of worse things to have than some chocolate once a week. Are you really on 90 days? Well done, and to Tree as well!

I like your gardening style, Gardener - my colour choices are much more subdued, but I love riotous color in other people's gardens.

Gloria, I like your building blocks approach - forever is too long, but I can do today. And 30 todays make 30 AF days. So simple, even I can understand the principle behind it!

FF, nice to see you and all the other double initials back on track - DD, SS (SoberSoul).

One or two people here were complaining about tiredness - had the same problem, and a series of Vit B12 shots really helped for me. Burns like crazy for a while, but it gives you an unbelievable boost - try it.

OK, I really hope this post makes it through.

Have a lovely AF Tuesday, Nesters!

[Byrdlady]

Newbies Nest

Good Morning, Nesters!
Pav, we are still dancing with glee over your 120 days!!
:dancin:

Great job, everyone, for getting another AF day under your belt! It does add up into a wonderful investment! Hold on to your quit as if it were a pot of gold!! Protect it, and encourage it! It really is like a garden...the hard work you put into it in the beginning pays big dividends down the road. It takes a while to see it sometimes, but the promise of all those good things we planted will be reaped!

Happy April 1, eva'body!!! Have a wonderful, af day!! Byrdie

[KENSHO]

Newbies Nest

LAV, how did we make it through with that terrible passed out sleep? I honestly don't know how I was functioning with such low quality sleep!

AVA, keep inspiring we young ones! You must feel so good on your 4 month mark!

Pepper - great job! Only one week ahead of you... I'v had good days and bad days, but the good days are more frequent now and the bad isn't as bad - a trend if you listen to the elders!

I'm a bit nervous for this weekend... leaving tomorrow for a family getaway at a cabin in the woods. 3 nights. Would typically involve drinking every night. I have gotten used to handling my husband and kids time - but my mom and step-dad are coming up for two of those nights. They like to drink - in fact I now realize they are somewhat responsible for putting the "its ok to drink often" idea in my head. They are able to go a full week without it, and only have one here and there, but I cannot. I am more afraid to tell them than I was my husband - don't want them to be disappointed in me, and they will feel I'm being a boring addition to the party. It will be tempting. Will need to have a good plan. Not sure if there is internet or phone service there. My next big test!!

Have a great Tuesday All! Keep racking up those AF Days!

[New Dreams]

Newbies Nest

Pavati;1643605 wrote: Good MAE, all:

NewDreams - your old theater night sounds a lot like my old theater night. So much better to enjoy the production without thinking about the next drink! You're lucky to have your DH along for the ride - someone close at hand who you can talk to. Does he get support somewhere else or only from you?

Pav

Congrats Pav on your 120 days! DH is not a joiner...so it's me...although we've told the family including his kids (my step kids) and they glad.

[frances]

Newbies Nest

I just wanted to post a quick not to say good luck this weekend Kensho! I thought people would mind me not drinking but I have found so far that as long as they can still drink they don't seem to give me not drinking a second thought. Maybe your mom and step-dad will be the same...hopefully!

[fiddyonefiddy]

Newbies Nest

my biggest challenges are on the weekends

[Dottie Belle]

Newbies Nest

MAE all,
Woke up feeling down in the dumps...no clue why..feeling overwhelmed with things to do and no energy to do a darn thing. bleh

[Petrelhead]

Newbies Nest

DB, that should pass hopefully. I think we all have days of no energy.

Ava, you must be jetting out today. Give us a wave as you fly through Queensland on your way to Thailand lucky you. Reminds me, I need a holiday. I have a week off in school holidays in a few weeks time. I might take my sons away for a few days and do something fun.

Well, day 38 begins. I went to a meeting last night, annual state president visit of my local professional society. After dinner,we traditionally have dinner at a local restaurant . Most people have a few wines, without anyone getting drunk. I think my sense of smell is becoming more acute. When the red wine was poured, I could smell it's intensity. Have to say the aroma was nice, but I had zero temptation to try it. It was interesting, only the older people drank. Everyone younger than me, didn't drink any at all.

[available]

Newbies Nest

MAE everyone

Well Petrel i go tomorrow, i must have gotten so excited that was ahead of myself by a day and i dont leave until tomorrow. So today i have plenty of time to pack and visit my daughters for lunch and get organised. Feels so good to know i dont have to work for 3 weeks. This is the longest holiday i have had forever and it will be nice to recharge the batteries.

Kensho, thank you, each day it becomes easier to not drink, not think about drinking and just live life without it. I was saying on the Loamers thread about how it is hard to imagine now the first early days of giving up and how hard it was and the cravings, the detoxing, the no sleep, the anxiety but now it is a distant memory and one that i do not wish to repeat in this lifetime. You will be fine when you away, if you have an urge to drink, turn away and walk outside, make a coffee. I know you can do this, at the end of the day its about protecting your sobriety with every bit of strength that you have. I am sure that when i am in Thailand that i will be pulling that strength out also but i will not drink AT or FOR anyone anymore. I love my sober life way too much.

No K9 world didnt end thank god, that would mean i would miss my holiday and i would not be happy about that one at all. Life is way too good now.

Glad to have you back FF, was there an idea that you could moderate at all? You need to post on here forever and a day to be accountable. As Byrd says the ones that leave the nest are nearly always drinking again. This is my AA and i need to check in twice a day, everyday and its not hard to do. One day i may be ready to fly away but that wont be anytime soon, i am planning on that in maybe 5+ years. always good to have a plan, short term and long term.

Lav i had a chuckle about feeling like a grown up and yes you are totally right, i feel like a grown up now and am damn happy about that. Cant wait to see my mothers face when i tell her i have not drank for 4 months, i hope it is a face that shows relief and pride and i can move on to having a better relationship with her. That is my next mission for you dear Lav as i remember an old post you put up about your mum.

Gardener, great to see you still here, the fog lifts eventually and imagine how you felt every time you drank but add a hangover and anxiety and shame. None of that now.

Fiddy I found on weekends i thought i deserved a drink and i had worked all week and needed to relax. I cant figure out why i thought i deserved a drink Monday to Thursday also. I drank 7 days a week and i did not deserve or need to drink any of those days i now realise. The weekends are hard but keep busy and keep on here when you feel like a drink. My first weekend was hell but i felt so proud of myself to do it and then the ball was rolling and still is.

Dot big hugs to you my lovely. How can you be sad when you know i am going on holidays lol. Have a break from the cleaning of the clutter and have a you day, you deserve it and you know we cant put too much pressure on ourselves as we know where that leads. Not that you will, i know that.

well better go and make another cuppa and spring into the day. I would never have said that 4 months ago. Thank you everyone for being here on mwo to help me in this journey, feeling a bit sentimental that i wont be able to check in tomorrow as will be airporting and flying most of the day and the iphone does not do it for me although i can still read. I do know that i wont let anyone down on this holiday and definitely not myself or my children or my wonderful cyber friends. xx

[Byrdlady]

Newbies Nest

Available, we'll be thinking of you and will be hanging out in your back pocket! We know you've got this!!
Kensho, it is sometimes awkward being the only non drinker, this happens to me all the time now...you DO get used to it. Remember, we've already had our share! :H
I have a sticky note in the drawer here in my desk, this might help you and it's easy:
S: Stop
O: Observe
B: Breathe
E: Experience
R: Respond

So often, our immediate CURE is to run to a drink, but sometimes just stopping the cycle helps you regain control. If you can't get a phone signal, just think of that!

Fiddy....weekends were hard for me, too. There at the end, I didn't even drive on the weekends because I started drinking at 10:30 in the morning. Why 10:30? That's as long as I could hold out. So I was drinking pretty much from morning to night on weekends. You just have to keep yourself distracted and set yourself to a task....I love to bake, so I did a lot of that when I had so many extra hours to fill. I took things to neighbors who don't get out much. You can't imagine what a good feeling it is to do something nice for someone when they aren't expecting it. Write some letters, on paper and mail them, that is a lost art. If you have a dog, call a nursing home and see if you can bring him by to visit some old folks, you will certainly bring a smile to their faces. In other words, try and take the focus off of you and what you can't have and capitalize on your strengths....helping others is so rewarding! It sounds sappy even when I say it, but anything that helps you over the hump is worth it. If I can do it, I have faith that you can, too!

Fat Fella, how are you doing today?? Thinking of you!
Have a great evening, all!! Good to see everyone!! Byrdie

[Dottie Belle]

Newbies Nest

ava I need a holiday too. I did absolutely nothing productive today...have a meeting to church tonight so guess I will have to go....
Tomorrow is another day and there is much to do....wish the gremlins would come in while I am asleep and clean my house....