Newbies Nest

[NoSugar]

Newbies Nest

Hi, FF

It sounds like you really need to do this NOW. I guarantee you that alcohol is not worth losing a relationship over. Just take the option OFF THE TABLE. Do whatever you have to day to day and hour to hour and minute to minute. The only thing you can't do is drink That leaves you so many options. I wish there were some way to let anyone struggling know how once you work your way past first the physical issues and then the psychological ones, you come out the other side free of this weight we've been carrying for years. As I look back now, I absolutely cannot believe I lived like that. It is so worth the short term (and it IS relatively short) discomfort to make it to the place where the thought of drinking does not dominate your life. I think about how I'm not drinking and it is a happy thought. Please don't let AL take one more thing away from you FF. All the best, NS

[Fat fella]

Newbies Nest

Thanks NS, your words mean, and help, a lot.

[Rahulthesweet]

Newbies Nest

Hello friends,

What does this reminds you of ? Tired, drowsed, sleepy, headache , unable to work, concentrate, bloated, tired, weak. ... I was like that yesterday ... Wow what a bad day of food poisoning. It was a harsh reminded to me of my drinking days. That was more or less how infused to feel in morning and thru out the day .... This morning woke up with full sleep 100% recharged !

Byrdlady I am here ... Going no where.

Welcome Fat Fella : we all so relate to you. Drinking is not worth it life is. Life and drinking cannot go along. They conflict with each other ...

Available : congrats and hugs on 150 days ...

Jane : glad you are so active here and with such good spirits.

Getting ready for my looong trip to Europe next week.

[TJAF]

Newbies Nest

Fat fella;1654922 wrote: Morning all and thanks for the positive comments, especially BL and Pav for the advice which I will follow. Like Pav I'll struggle to free my house from booze because my wife and sons all like a drink. I guess on this point I'll have to just find another strategy. I looked at a bottle of wine on the kitchen worktop last night and just tried to visualise all of the pain and hurt it has caused over the last 20 years of my life. I need to try and AL as an enemy not a friend. Well, day 3 starts in a determined way, but I'd better get to work so I'll check in later.

One quick thing, I'm considering getting some L glut amine to try and cut down the sugar/ AL cravings. Anyone tried it?

Fella: I just read your post regarding the ultimatum you got...I am sorry that you have the added pressure this early in your quit. Reading your note above it is fair that you ask your family for support if in turn you have a gun to your head. If they value your sobriety and drinking isn't a problem for them then asking your family to not keep booze in the house is both fair and supportive. The gym is an excellent idea. Keeping yourself busy is huge this earlier in the fight. Drink a ton of water and try (as hard as it can be) to get a good nights sleep. Most importantly talk openly with your family about support. Having that help will go a long way to success. Develop your plan, keep a journal, post here and keep fighting hard each and every day

[SpiritGirl]

Newbies Nest

Just checking in, Nesters... Day 6 for me... I am finding that L-Glut may very well be my new best friend... I was skeptical about it curving the cravings but I think it's really working... I take the chewables...

I have been consuming myself with trying to figure out how I am going to get to 3 months AF - 6 months - a year... It all seems unfathomable... If I keep concentrating on this I fear I will sabotage myself... I need to get into the frame of mind that today is the only day I need to think about.... I read posts about how some people have made it months & months AF and then relapse thinking that they can moderate... Then I think, "yeah - that will be me"... Which discourages me... I don't believe in myself fully because of my patterns in the past... I feel like the boy who cried wolf - "I am quitting this time!" only to start drinking over again and again and again... So now I'm in the mind frame of wondering how long it will be before I "cry wolf" and pour that glass of wine.... Ugh... I'm hoping things get better after this first week.... Day 6 for me - and today I'm not going to drink...

[available]

Newbies Nest

Hi Nesters

FF its sad that others think it is so easy to stop and for them it obviously is. For us it is "hell on wheels" that no one understands except us fellow alkies. I finally told my kids a little while ago how damn hard it was, that i still got cravings to just have one drink but i wont. I cant let them down anymore. Al affects everyone it comes into contact with, not only the drinker. I hope other than the stress you feel about the ultimatum that you go for it and stop drinking. No one is worth drinking AT and believe me your relationship will be much better. I have patched my relationship up with my mother and i realise that it was al that was 99% of our problem (me being the drinker and holder of massive grudges). One day at a time FF, keep on here daily and you have a wealth of help from fellow drunks on here. Feel your emotions and live them without al, you will never regret it. Hugs to you.

Spirit you have the right frame of mind to take it one day at a time. Only you can put that glass of wine to your lips and drink, no one else will do it for you. I, like you, was waiting to fail, thinking that i have gotten this far so when will it happen, when will i take that first drink and be at day 1 again. I realised that I wont if i stay determined and strong, that it will only be me that takes that drink. It also does get easier as the days go by Spirit. Now i dont crave/urge or want to kill for al, the thought comes and goes after a little fight with the arsehole. We all protect our quit with whatever it takes, the ones with days up, it is complacency that will get me to drink again, when i "think" i am cured of al. I will never be cured of being an alcoholic so i live with protecting my quit daily and forever. You can do this Spirit, if i can and others can, you can also.

Rahul, thanks for the congrats (and everyone else on 150 days), i can totally relate to realising that it was just your body telling you something and not after a night of al drinking. I have the flu and i know i feel like this as i am sick not hungover. Last year when i had the flu i drank also, i just shudder to think how i did that but for me being sick was another excuse to drink as i already felt bad so may as well feel worse. A loooooong flight, i feel for you but you will be fine and i will be thinking of you.

Newbies, keep on keeping on and keep on being on here.

[Dila]

Newbies Nest

Day 3 for me. Changed my routine and went to run errands after work so I got home later. Have to admit I am having a bad craving for a glass of wine. When I was walking in the house I actually thought I would have one glass just to relax but then the thought of telling you made me stop and say "No Way". Thanks for your support...it is making a difference!

Snap - good luck on the 30 day shred

Ava - 150 days is terrific! You inspire me.

Lav, Byrdie and DTD - you are all wonderful with your advice

Welcome FF - we can do this!

[j-vo]

Newbies Nest

FF,
Sometimes it's ultimatums like you got today to make us realize we need to do everything in our power to stay away from al. We don't want to lose our loved ones, don't want to hurt them anymore, and this evil juice will destroy those relationships. I've seen it firsthand the abuse it's caused in my DH's family. Not pretty. Hold onto those loved ones and kick the sh** outa the devil, Al. You don't need him to survive, he'll actually prevent you from surviving. But after you start feeling the good stuff, he gets smaller and smaller until he's so small you can squash him. The gym is a great distraction, and don't know if you enjoy any tv, but I've found I'm enjoying watching sitcoms again to just laugh at stupid things. It's good medicine.

Hang in there Spirit Girl! NS makes good points about noticing the smallest things in your day that you can be grateful for. Write them down. I know the list you write wouldn't be the same list on a hungover day. I was chasing my dog around the house the other day, and I hadn't done that in years. Just laughing and playing. Blessing.

[Dila]

Newbies Nest

Day 3 for me. Changed my routine and went to run errands after work so I got home later. Have to admit I am having a bad craving for a glass of wine. When I was walking in the house I actually thought I would have one glass just to relax but then the thought of telling you made me stop and say "No Way". Thanks for your support...it is making a difference!

Snap - good luck on the 30 day shred

Ava - 150 days is terrific! You inspire me.

Lav, Byrdie and DTD - you are all wonderful with your advice

Welcome FF - we can do this!
:h

[j-vo]

Newbies Nest

Dila, good for you! Is there wine in your house? Is there any way you can pitch it?

[j-vo]

Newbies Nest

FF,
My husband never gave me an ultimatum, but the tension in the house from my drinking really made for a sad home, no trust, and DS not being his normal, happy self. I've got all that back and more.

[Dila]

Newbies Nest

j-vo - my DH likes to have a glass of wine with dinner so it is in the house. He does not have a problem with AL. I know it would be easier if it were not within reach but I am going to have to deal with it being here. He is seeing me spending hours reading everyone's posts so I think he is understanding more and more.
I started eating organic a few months ago and he said he never would(strongheaded old fashion Italian man)but little by little he is so maybe I can get him to stop the little drinking that he does and not have it around.

[Byrdlady]

Newbies Nest

FF, gosh, the very same thing happened to me. My hubs packed his clothes and left on Jan 19, 2011. I dont even remember my last drink. He came back the next day to get more clothes and told me to be thinking how to divide our possessions. He said it was him or AL. I have to tell you, it seemed like an impossible chioce. I coukd either give in to ALK'ism or fight for my hubs back. I was scared....I HAD to win. I was out of chances. I took it one day at a time. Today, our relationsip is stronger than ever. While at times I was bitter about the position I was in, in retrospect, he saved my life. I was really in a downward spiral. Quitting drinking is the single best thing I have done myself in YEARS. I am just sorry it had to come to that.....I sure wish I had done it years before. I wasted a lot of time, and caused so many people pain and anguish. I bet in 30 days when you are getting your hat, you will look back and be thankful, too. This is not the end, it's the beginning!!! Hugs, Byrdie

[NoSugar]

Newbies Nest

Byrdlady;1655256 wrote: This is not the end, it's the beginning!!! Hugs, Byrdie

Now that sums it up perfectly, Byrdie! And like any beginning, it is kind of scary but it also can be exciting. Each sober day is an accomplishment. Each "first" without AL can be a challenge to meet - not an obstacle to be feared. This can be a time of big rewards and boosts to your self-confidence. As much as you can, ENJOY this process - it is changing you for the better!

[Lavande]

Newbies Nest

Good evening Nesters,

I could swear winter is trying to make a return
Damp & chilly does not make Spring!

One day at a time means one day at a time kids!
Don't worry about how or what you are going to do in the future - focus on getting thru the day. The AF days pile up pretty quickly

Wishing everyone a safe & cozy night in the nest!

Lav