Newbies Nest

[Juja]

Newbies Nest

Well, I'm sheet-faced. Slept til 8:30, and now I'm full of energy, and feeling positive. So glad I didn't drink last night. Today is Day 7, and I can hardly believe it. Me??

Sheesh, NMJ, I don't think I could keep up your work pace. That's far too much working. I hope you can relax some this weekend.

daisy45, How nice your daughter noticed. What else is she noticing? Is your relationship with her different?

Oh, pepper, I remember filling my wine glass over and over, hoping no one would notice. Joke's on me; they noticed, and watched. I was arrogant, and didn't care, and proceeded to get louder, more aggressive, and just plain obnoxious. (Shiver)

DD, "bereft" is the perfect verb for a hangover.

Can we all check in periodically this weekend, even though it's a busy one? If we stay connected, the positive energy will continue.

Hi, Pav, j-vo, Om, Byrdie, Frances, Lav, and everyone else I missed.

See you tonight.

[available]

Newbies Nest

Hi Juj, congratulations on your 7 days and yes you did it all by yourself. A whole week of making the decision not to drink. Its a great feeling isnt it.

We dont have a long weekend here, that is in June for the Queens birthday, even though her birthday is in April. Go figure!

I just had a BIG wineglass so i did not need to fill it as much and i got the boys to fill it for me. My son used to tell me to fill my own as otherwise i would not realise how drunk i was and fall over, so i would TELL him to get it and he would and then i would get up and fall over. Thank god those days are gone. I shudder when those memories surface but thats in the past now and he does not need to do that anymore, nor does he have to go to the shops when i run out of wine. Poor kids, i would not take no for an answer even if it meant them driving around to find a bottlo open. Now its chocolate!

Dil you can never ever have enough af drinks lol.

[Rahulthesweet]

Newbies Nest

Juja,

Going sober after long sessions of drinking is amazing. Its like as if you are reborn. You stqrt looking life from a different prospective. Initially the prospective is hard to live with. How can I enjoy beach without coctail. Clubbing with shots ? Going to a bar or dinner and not drinking. Dinner with customers and no wine ? Staying home along and no booze ?

Try not to thing about it ... take a chill pill. Say I am notdrinking today ... thats it ... let time pass ... and see how things change how automatically craving will go away.

I am 90 days sober and proud. 3 months back I was shouting ..... HELP ME!! ... now I feel like showing .. I AM FREE ...

[Byrdlady]

Newbies Nest

Wow, what powerful posts coming in!!
Daisy, you are killin it! Like Rahul just said, let TIME be your best friend, it is just amazing that getting that distance makes all the difference! So proud of you, good luck with your backdrop AND with that mountain tomorrow! You are really coming into your own!!

Dila, when DD used that word 'bereft' to describe the morning after, I thought the same thing you did....that is the perfect word to describe it! DD so happy to hear you are hanging strong...what a blessing that AL is not in the picture at thus challenging time. All of our best vibes are being sent to you!

How bout Juja with 7 days!!!!!!! Let me give you a MOON for putting this week behind you!
:moon:
Here 's to kicking AL's arse! A week of no AL makes AL so weak! Keep up the streak!!!! We are so proud of you!

Rahul, you are a changed man. If someone could write a book about a man who has made a total C change in his life, you would be the main character! Imagine, it IS possible to conduct business without AL!!! 90 days is incredible! You are King of the Hill around here!!
:crowned:

Some of the neighbors had a high ole time last night. At 2 in the morning they were outside hooting and hollering. I bet they have big heads this morning. Waking up sheet faced is great, a good night of real sleep is the best. ( as opposed to s*it faced).

I also have terrible memories of this holiday. Several years I organized a neighborhood party, invited my sister and her family to come down and join us....I ended up passing out and missing the whole thing. My sister stayed behind and looked after me as I was passed out in the bed. Dear lord, I sure wish I could take that all back and redo it. Cant do that, but I will not let that happen again. AL is not going to rob me of one more day of my precious life!

Lav, enjoy your day, sweet lady!

Strength to all this weekend! Byrdie

[j-vo]

Newbies Nest

Oh, Holiday memories, picnics, BBQ's, and me sloppy drunk. I was a sloppy one, so I never did do well hiding. Many times I had to stumble to bed before guests left. Wow. Cringe. And that's what makes this weekend so liberating to me now. Being able to go somewhere, trust myself, believe and know I'm gonna have a great time and not screw it up. I feel all grown up and all there.

Long weekends are great, but it was just an extra day for me to imbibe. When you think that you're going to get caught up with rest and get sheet-faced, you get shit-faced and go back to work feeling more tired than ever. Stay AF this weekend! Get rejuvenated.

DD, it is the everyday, small things that make a huge difference. So glad you're doing well.

Juja, Congratulations on Day 7!!!! And good for you for passing up that glass of pinot. You're flexing your sober muscles girl. Keep it going.

Byrdie, Judge Judy scares the crap out of me! Take that bottle to your boss! Visualizations work very well for me!

Rahul, congrats on your 90! That's so great! Woot! Woot!

Petrel, enjoy your run on the beach. You wouldn't have been able to do that had you drunk last night. Enjoy.

Daisy, that's just the thing. It's a thought - A glass of wine would be nice - but then again, I never just had one, and that one turned into too many. Pushing through the thoughts, riding them out, or eating like you did are key. Good luck on your mountain climb tomorrow!

Pepper, what a great story of you and your friend. This is a perfect example of how getting Al out of our lives has positive affects on our relationships, especially close relationships. Warmed my heart. Thank you.

Ava, I was a falling-over sloppy drunk, too. Not pretty.

Dila, I hope there's a toilet close-by!!!

Have a good day all.

[Rahulthesweet]

Newbies Nest

Byrdlady,

Thanks for the compliment. I have the best guides here at MWO.

I am not yet a changed man. I want to change more for good for becoming a better person. It is about introspecting. I think I always had that knack for introspecting and improving myself. But last 10 to 15 years of drinking that art of introspecting was totally blocked by AL. It was all about where am I drinking, what am I drinking.
...
But I was talking about experiencing life from a different prospective here are few situations :

I just returned from Srilanka from a corporate conference which was on an exotic resort. Imagine u come to a sea side resort on a hot humid evening. Next to blue beach. Surrounded with people who are dying for a drink. Sounds tempting for a Drink. No I got tempted to take a swim. I preferred that ... While everyone was getting relaxed with beers I took the swimming. By the time I came to dinner. Everyone was done drinking and tired like hell (thanks to booze). I wanted to go out I was full of energy, guess what I explored the local party scene with bunch of people who dont drink or take a glass or so. I felt like a teen aged. I myself was surprised as for me the biggest attraction was booze next to a beach bar till I would collapse on bed.

Conference and gala dinners. Oh and booze flowing. How temping but here was I enjoying company of friends no desire to drink. It was a feeling of liberation. They were doing what ever they do so drank some didn't.

Thing about corporate trips there is also sight scene at least for one day. So we were in bus the whole day .... By evening everyone was dead tired ... "Oh I am soooo dying for a drink !!" ... "Yeah chilled beer !"... Some remarked !! Surprise .. I was not, not even thinking about !! And I was not crushing any desire .. It was not there ... Wow felt so proud. But I know someday I will be tempted but MWO is here ...

Yesterday night we went to chic bar on rooftop with great music.... South African band, playing rage music. Wow what weather (open bar) . the gang ordered a Bootle of premium vodka. But they know I dont drink "you dont need a drink you are already high and enjoy so much ... Anyways " the best compliment anyone can give me. 4 am booom every one slaushed ... Me loving the night driving in Colombo city admiring the beautiful colonial building. Proud and sober .... So many remarks :

"How can u not drink !"
"Teach me how you dance so well ... " said someone (I never used to dance ... I used to wave like a drunk)
"We really enjoyed your company" ... Wow I thought I no one liked me and I needed booze to open me up.
"You take so beautiful pictures ... " ( I was too busy drinking away never realizing the moment was out there )

Now these kind of compliment surprise me .... For me I have been known as a drunk ...

One more shock to me ... I always felt that with booze once connects so well with people. Past 3 to 4 days I have connected so much and so well people and by telling the truth (3 months back I would have been lying). People genuienly liked me ... I forged such great bonds with few business ppl that they went ahead to share personal details about their life with MEEE ????!!! Wow. All this by being honest to myself and honestly telling others ,with a HUGE sence of pride and gratitude :

"I dont drink !"

It's a game changer guys ... Celebrate sobriety, protect it, it's precious.

[Lavande]

Newbies Nest

Good afternoon Nesters,

Happy Saturday to all.
Getting ready for a BBQ, the weather is perfect

CONGRATS Rahul & Juja both celebrating AF milestones today
Hello to everyone - have a wonderful AF day!!!

Lav

[Byrdlady]

Newbies Nest

Rahul, would you consider putting that pist in the Tool Box? It is amazing! i am so happy for you! For me, I. felt like Dorothy on the Wizard of Oz when she opened the door and her world went from Black and White to color! Yes, it is just that dramatic! I am just so thrilled and proud for you!

Hey Lav!!! Xxxooo, Byrdie

[daisy45]

Newbies Nest

I agree - great post Rahul. That is the kind of post that helps newbies understand that they need to persevere, wait, give it time and it will come........
Just back from my friend's house. Loads of drink there, jelly shots, champagne, beer, wine.......was offered about 3 different times but noone really bothered as I said I was climbing the mountain tomorrow.
When leaving arrangements were being made for me to go on a girlie night out in 2 weeks. I said yes. I still don't want to say to anyone that I am not drinking so I will wait and see how I feel when the time comes......
Really enjoyed tonight; an old childhood neighbour was there and we had great craic. When I got up to go he was surprised I was driving as he had assumed I was drinking.....like you Rahul, seems we can be good craic without Al on board - what a revelation!!
Anyways, night all, early start, weather permitting......

[Juja]

Newbies Nest

I made it. 7 days. It was tough today, and I could feel myself wavering. However, to come here and say I drank, would be awful, just awful, so I won't drink. So, I'm going to pull out the little calendar I keep by my bed, and mark off 7 days.

Worked all day doing this and that, but I enjoyed myself. But, I want to learn to relax, dammit, and maybe that will come. I know it's because I don't want too much time to think about my separation, ending a 30+year marriage, and the pain I will feel from the loss. I seem to be stuck in "now," not looking forward and not looking back, so I won't feel. I cried for months after I left, so I don't know what this stage is. Any experience with this out there?

Congrats to all you fabulous folks who are making progress. Rahul--90 days is fantastic.

To those of you who might be lurking, and are hesitant to jump in, come on in the water's fine.

Oh, and "bereft" is an adjective. :blush: I can't believe I called it a verb.

My all of you be blessed with the sandman's sheet tonight!

[Pavati]

Newbies Nest

Hi, Nest:

Glad you made it through a tough day, Juja. My favorite way to relax is to exercise first. I also downloaded a meditation app called "Calm." Quick, 10 - 20 minute meditations that help.

I don't have experience with divorce myself, although my sister is going through it now (after 25 years). She read a lot of books about finding herself, hung out with me a lot, wrote in a journal and slowly started figuring out what the future holds for her. She got a new job and joined a hiking club - she is meeting many new people and getting in shape, too. She (after 2 years) is doing amazing. I am certain that whatever you settle in to, drinking alcohol would make it harder to find.

Rahul! Congratulations! Love that 90 day post. You seem like a changed man - swimming in the warm ocean sounds a lot better to me right now than drinking. You should put that post in the tool box.

Daisy - Do what you need to do to stay sober. If you have to, plead a headache if you're not feeling strong that night. I have said no a few times when I wasn't up for socializing - it actually feels good to slow down and focus on my family for now - I know my kids will leave home before I know it...

Good Night, Nest. Happy Sober Saturday. (Hi, Dreamy - I'll need a double latte tomorrow...)

Pav

[Sarah42]

Newbies Nest

Hi Nesters!

Hope everyone is having a WONDERFUL Holiday weekend!!! We aren't doing anything really special here, as the kids aren't here, and hubby is getting ready to go see his mother out of state the next weekend.

Lot's of good news to report though...

Insurance company agreed to cover our new roof! yes we still have to pay a hefty deductible, but it's better than paying over $15k for a new roof out of OUR pocket. Work will start next week.

As to my shakes...I went ahead and picked up some St. John's Wort 3 days ago, and WOW I feel like a different person! No shaking...head feels clear in the a.m. and throughout the day, and the desire to drink AL has decreased even more! I've slept so well the last 2 nights.

Of course, I will keep in mind the shakes could be neurological (as Byrdie and other's said to look for), so will keep seeing how it goes. Maybe this whole thing could be anxiety??? (including the need for AL?) Who knows...time will tell. But, it IS becoming easier for me to resist AL.

I have always thought that AL dependency is caused initially by psychological or pain disorders, and once we realize the 'cause' of what we are trying to treat with Al, then we have a better shot of getting rid of this demon. I feel I'm very very close to figuring this out.

Pepper- I too have not confessed to my family about this thing (except my hubby). Not sure how I would handle that either, or even if it is necessary tbh. But everyone is different and if you feel you should share your not drinking with your brother or whomever else...then obviously that's your call.

Rahul- what a wonderful post! I tried to visualize myself in your situation and feel of the warm water; and proud feeling you had. It was extremely uplifting to me! So thank you for the post and plz post it in the Tool Box.

Ju-hu, Dila, FF- Keep it up! Ya'll are warriors! I'm so glad that I found the NN to help me get to where you all are and that you are willing to share your experiences.

DTD- welcome back! can't respond to everyone, but plz know I read every posts and I love you guys/gals!

love,

Sarah

[Sarah42]

Newbies Nest

Hi Nesters!

Hope everyone is having a WONDERFUL Holiday weekend!!! We aren't doing anything really special here, as the kids aren't here, and hubby is getting ready to go see his mother out of state the next weekend.

Lot's of good news to report though...

Insurance company agreed to cover our new roof! yes we still have to pay a hefty deductible, but it's better than paying over $15k for a new roof out of OUR pocket. Work will start next week.

As to my shakes...I went ahead and picked up some St. John's Wort 3 days ago, and WOW I feel like a different person! No shaking...head feels clear in the a.m. and throughout the day, and the desire to drink AL has decreased even more! I've slept so well the last 2 nights.

Of course, I will keep in mind the shakes could be neurological (as Byrdie and other's said to look for), so will keep seeing how it goes. Maybe this whole thing could be anxiety??? (including the need for AL?) Who knows...time will tell. But, it IS becoming easier for me to resist AL.

I have always thought that AL dependency is caused initially by psychological or pain disorders, and once we realize the 'cause' of what we are trying to treat with Al, then we have a better shot of getting rid of this demon. I feel I'm very very close to figuring this out.

Pepper- I too have not confessed to my family about this thing (except my hubby). Not sure how I would handle that either, or even if it is necessary tbh. But everyone is different and if you feel you should share your not drinking with your brother or whomever else...then obviously that's your call.

Rahul- what a wonderful post! I tried to visualize myself in your situation and feel of the warm water; and proud feeling you had. It was extremely uplifting to me! So thank you for the post and plz post it in the Tool Box.

Ju-hu, Dila, FF- Keep it up! Ya'll are warriors! I'm so glad that I found the NN to help me get to where you all are and that you are willing to share your experiences.

DTD- welcome back! can't respond to everyone, but plz know I read every posts and I love you guys/gals!

love,

Sarah

[Sarah42]

Newbies Nest

Hi Nesters!

Hope everyone is having a WONDERFUL Holiday weekend!!! We aren't doing anything really special here, as the kids aren't here, and hubby is getting ready to go see his mother out of state the next weekend.

Lot's of good news to report though...

Insurance company agreed to cover our new roof! yes we still have to pay a hefty deductible, but it's better than paying over $15k for a new roof out of OUR pocket. Work will start next week.

As to my shakes...I went ahead and picked up some St. John's Wort 3 days ago, and WOW I feel like a different person! No shaking...head feels clear in the a.m. and throughout the day, and the desire to drink AL has decreased even more! I've slept so well the last 2 nights.

Of course, I will keep in mind the shakes could be neurological (as Byrdie and other's said to look for), so will keep seeing how it goes. Maybe this whole thing could be anxiety??? (including the need for AL?) Who knows...time will tell. But, it IS becoming easier for me to resist AL.

I have always thought that AL dependency is caused initially by psychological or pain disorders, and once we realize the 'cause' of what we are trying to treat with Al, then we have a better shot of getting rid of this demon. I feel I'm very very close to figuring this out.

Pepper- I too have not confessed to my family about this thing (except my hubby). Not sure how I would handle that either, or even if it is necessary tbh. But everyone is different and if you feel you should share your not drinking with your brother or whomever else...then obviously that's your call.

Rahul- what a wonderful post! I tried to visualize myself in your situation and feel of the warm water; and proud feeling you had. It was extremely uplifting to me! So thank you for the post and plz post it in the Tool Box.

Ju-hu, Dila, FF- Keep it up! Ya'll are warriors! I'm so glad that I found the NN to help me get to where you all are and that you are willing to share your experiences.

DTD- welcome back! can't respond to everyone, but plz know I read every posts and I love you guys/gals!

love,

Sarah

[Sarah42]

Newbies Nest

Hi Nesters!

Hope everyone is having a WONDERFUL Holiday weekend!!! We aren't doing anything really special here, as the kids aren't here, and hubby is getting ready to go see his mother out of state the next weekend.

Lot's of good news to report though...

Insurance company agreed to cover our new roof! yes we still have to pay a hefty deductible, but it's better than paying over $15k for a new roof out of OUR pocket. Work will start next week.

As to my shakes...I went ahead and picked up some St. John's Wort 3 days ago, and WOW I feel like a different person! No shaking...head feels clear in the a.m. and throughout the day, and the desire to drink AL has decreased even more! I've slept so well the last 2 nights.

Of course, I will keep in mind the shakes could be neurological (as Byrdie and other's said to look for), so will keep seeing how it goes. Maybe this whole thing could be anxiety??? (including the need for AL?) Who knows...time will tell. But, it IS becoming easier for me to resist AL.

I have always thought that AL dependency is caused initially by psychological or pain disorders, and once we realize the 'cause' of what we are trying to treat with Al, then we have a better shot of getting rid of this demon. I feel I'm very very close to figuring this out.

Pepper- I too have not confessed to my family about this thing (except my hubby). Not sure how I would handle that either, or even if it is necessary tbh. But everyone is different and if you feel you should share your not drinking with your brother or whomever else...then obviously that's your call.

Rahul- what a wonderful post! I tried to visualize myself in your situation and feel of the warm water; and proud feeling you had. It was extremely uplifting to me! So thank you for the post and plz post it in the Tool Box.

Ju-hu, Dila, FF- Keep it up! Ya'll are warriors! I'm so glad that I found the NN to help me get to where you all are and that you are willing to share your experiences.

DTD- welcome back! can't respond to everyone, but plz know I read every posts and I love you guys/gals!

love,

Sarah