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    El, you dont need to label yourself an alcoholic if you dont want to, for me that is what i am, my brother was an alcoholic (he had the label) and he died from alcohol. I classify myself as one as then i have totally admitted to myself that that is what i am and therefore to me, i can never drink again, i can never pick up a glas of al and be a normal drinker. I am sooo not normal in drinking and i never ever will be.

    The voice does go away but yes it does rear its head occasionally. For me its when stress hits or its a nice day and i have family around but i cant and wont let my children down or myself. I used to think of that voice as a toddler having a tantrum and wanting something, it drove me nuts but if i gave in, i would drink and i never want to drink again. I dont think i have another quit in me and i dont want an opportunity to arise to find out. For me this is it, the end of the line with my relationship with al, we cant be together anymore.

    Maria get rid of that wine sooner rather than later.
    AF free 1st December 2013 - 1st December 2022 - 9 years of freedom

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      Newbies Nest

      Soft summer morning here with coffee in bed. Heat and thunderstorms to come later.

      Orimus>The beers were a coin on the track. It doesn't sound like it de-railed you. I don't, for a moment, believe it will. Thanks for the advice, too. It's early in our separation, so there's lots of navigating to do, and I'm trying to find my way.

      Make it a good day everyone.
      "Remember, you are responsible for creating your life by every thought, action, choice. Choose well." Oprah Winfrey

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        Newbies Nest

        Good morning all! Tired here today and waiting for the coffee to kick in.

        Glad to see everyone sticking close to the nest!

        Seems like everything is just go go go these days with all of the end of school year activities - combined with sports we are out every evening. Keeps me out of trouble :-)

        Have a great AF day :-) I'm off to get ready for work..

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          Newbies Nest

          Good morning Nesters & Happy Hump day

          Waiting for that coffee kick start myself Frances
          I remember that frantic & busy end of the school year mania too. It's nice when the kids grow up

          Eloise, I am not a person fond of labels either. They always seem to have a negative connotation & gets you feeling & thinking negatively. Getting into a positive way of thinking helped me kick this problem. The inner voice will go away provided you ignore it long enough. Any thoughts I have now of AL are in a historic sense - I used to drink but not anymore

          Wishing everyone a great AF Wednesday!

          Lav
          AF since 03/26/09
          NF since 05/19/09
          Success comes one day at a time :thumbs:

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            Newbies Nest

            Morning, Nesters!
            I've had enough coffee to perk up Manhattan!
            Hot already outside...what did I bring to wear? A cute sweater! 5 hours of driving gets a girl to a totally different climate. I will be sweating worse than Paris Hilton at a spelling bee!

            Lav, I couldnt agree with you more, this battle takes all the grit you can muster and you have to adopt a Zero Tolerance Policy. Unfortunately, you cant play nice with AL, he plays dirty, so you have to fight back with all you've got. I tried to be nice about it and forgave myself quickly for my 'slips'. But they weren't slips, they were intentional choices. Calling them a slip minimized it, and this is a big deal with big consequences. Do NOT give in, dig your heels in and stay the course, no matter what!

            Have a great day! happy B day, Petrel! Xxoo, Byrdie
            All you gotta do, is get thru this day. AF 1/20/2011
            Tool Box
            Newbie's Nest

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              Newbies Nest

              Not been around for a while, I hope everyone's doing ok. I'll have a read back of the last few days.
              I hear you guys on the friends telling you your not so bad - Had a few invites for drinking this weekend already but I'm gonna lay low and keep my nose clean so I can hit 7 days - First milestone eh?

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                Newbies Nest

                Brydie, I've got my stilettos in the dirt - nice and deep.

                Daisy, so glad they loved the backdrop! And you're getting so many things done with the energy. Isn't that a great feeling?

                Juja, another sober evening is great!

                Orimus, keep reading and posting. What will you do to stay away from the beast tonight?

                El, voices - I have more than just al voices. Oops. That was someone else talkin... They do become quieter after awhile. Just keep ignoring them.

                Have a good day!
                Sometimes what you're most afraid of doing is the very thing that will set you free.

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                  Newbies Nest

                  Mindraiser, be as selfish as you like this week - you have to put yourself first while you find your feet.....
                  Had a good day; gym, swim, shops to get bits and pieces to make props, went to visit a cousin and a friend I have not seen in almost a year....feeling great!
                  Anyone noticed we are page 5000 on the Newbies Nest? Wow, that speaks volumes!
                  IT'S NEVER TOO LATE TO BE WHAT YOU MIGHT HAVE BEEN
                  Relapse starts long before the drink is drunk!!.Fresh Start!

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                    Newbies Nest

                    And only 7 posts from 50,000 replies!

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                      Newbies Nest

                      I noticed that too Daisy, thats quite a lot of waffling lol. Every post can make a difference in someones lives and thats a good thing.
                      AF free 1st December 2013 - 1st December 2022 - 9 years of freedom

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                        Newbies Nest

                        Good Evening Everyone. I am in my bed now, Day Four AF achieved. I made a present of a collage of pictures of my boyfriend in Moldova (something dear to his heart) and left it at his house whilst he was out as a surprise for him. This is unlike me, I have demanded too much from him and given very little in return lately.. I give unconditionally but it does help me to feel less gsr.

                        There is drama at work but its not my drama TG. I am keeping busy and calm.

                        Speak again tomorrow

                        Maria

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                          Newbies Nest

                          Good evening Nesters,

                          Yes Daisy, I noticed the page number tonight
                          That sure is a lot of posting!!!!

                          Minderaser, 7 AF days is a major goal & we all want to see you make it & more

                          Maria, day 4 is pretty awesome too - good job!

                          Byrdie, you must be traveling south because it has suddenly gotten chilly here after a few thunderstorms. Buy yourself a nice T shirt :H

                          Wishing everyone a safe & cozy night in the nest!

                          Lav
                          AF since 03/26/09
                          NF since 05/19/09
                          Success comes one day at a time :thumbs:

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                            Newbies Nest

                            Evening, from the very sultry mid-Atlantic. A dehumidifier is next on my list of things to buy for my dump.

                            It's been a busy day, but a good one. All is well.

                            Mom, at assit'd living tomorrow, and covering at work for someone tomorrow night. I decided to take Friday off. I want some time to myself.

                            Tonight I was more honest with my husband. I told him I wanted to be alone, and take care of me. I made that very clear. I will also tell him I am not his therapist, and he needs to tell someone else his problems. Head up his ass, right Lavande? Leave me alone, I'm healing and dealing.

                            Keep the nest busy, okay?
                            "Remember, you are responsible for creating your life by every thought, action, choice. Choose well." Oprah Winfrey

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                              Newbies Nest

                              Maria, that's a really nice gesture.

                              Good choice Minderaser!

                              Juja, glad you were able to be honest with DH. This is what you need right now, and while you're taking care of things for yourself, I think you were right to give him a little push for what he needed.
                              Sometimes what you're most afraid of doing is the very thing that will set you free.

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                                Newbies Nest

                                Hello, folks - just checking in. A beast of a day -- a ton of betrayal, lies and back-stabbing at work. I ultimately put a stop to it all, but spent the day furious. I forgot to eat anything for breakfast or lunch. At 2:00 I decided I needed an escape. I only live 5 minutes from work so I drove home, grabbed an ice cream treat out of my freezer and sat on my deck for awhile calming down. Then I grabbed a second ice cream treat. After 30 minutes alone in the sun with my ice cream, I headed back to work to face the jungle again. Still angry, but calmer due to the power of ice cream and sunshine. It wasn't until I was driving back to work that I realized that AL never occurred to me -- a few months ago, I would have had a few vodka 7's at home, brushed my teeth and driven back to work. I've done that 100 times. With time, this really is becoming a new normal, slowly but surely, thanks to the support and inspiration of everyone here! As well as the Power of Ice Cream, which a person should never underestimate!

                                Happy Wednesday evening or Thurs morning, all!!
                                Gratefully AF and NF since March 23, 2014

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