Newbies Nest

[wagmore]

Newbies Nest

newbie

Hi everyone,

Today was Day 32 for me AF. This site helped me a bunch when I was going thru withdrawal about a month ago (I was lurking). Now am taking things one week/day/hour at a time. Doing ok, resisted temptation 3-4 times over the past 10 days when triggers arose, but am looking to get and give support.

[minderaser]

Newbies Nest

Pepper, I'm with you on the sleeping! I've slept sooo much this last week, I guess it's what the body needs!
Welcome you guys!!

[minderaser]

Newbies Nest

Pepper, I'm with you on the sleeping! I've slept sooo much this last week, I guess it's what the body needs!
Welcome you guys!!

[Juja]

Newbies Nest

Byrdlady;1667388 wrote: Morning, Nesters!
Juja, my situation was a bit different, but my hubs issued an ultimatum to me....either quit drinking or he was gone (and he left that night). I had 2 choices, either totally give in to AL, or fight for my sober life back and HOPE that I could also win my hubs back. I had an aging Dad, too, and family troubles out the wazoo. HOWEVER, quitting drinking was the single best thing I could do to help ALL of these things! Getting my own house in order was the foundation to making other key decisions that would come. The voice that is telling you not to take on AL right now, guess who that is? Yep, that's AL talking. I found that working on the AL thing was actually a good distraction to all the other chaos that was going on. Focusing on myself was the right thing to do. Falling back into the grips of AL (for ALKIES like us) is NEVER the answer. It will make every single thing WORSE. If you don't salvage anything else out of this whole situation, don't let sobriety be the thing you lose. You are going to lose your parents (eventually, sad but true) and if your hubs wants out there isn't much you can do to keep him. So what is left? YOU. You are all you've got in the end. Would your hubs rather stay with a sober Juja or a drunken Juja? What would you do if you were him? I'd say your BEST CHANCE at keeping it together will be if you get sober and stay sober. If we wait until everything calms down to start this process, we will be waiting a lifetime (a shorter one, due to AL). Don't waste another day on AL. Pull yourself together and fight this!! You can do it!!!

You are so right, Byrdie. I know that. I want to print this to read over and over.

I spent the weekend trying not to fly apart emotionally. I can only stay so busy, and on the run, for so long. I tried to sit with my uncomfortable feelings, and my thoughts would race. A short meditation via youtube helped (Thanks, Lav), but it got to where I couldn't sit still for that. I can't get in to see my therapist until a week from this Thursday, but she did chat with me for awhile. It helped.

I was doing so well. Why did I let my husband's neediness un-do the progress I had made in all aspects of my life?

I apologize for making this entire post about me. I needed to talk.

Welcome to all the new folks. You'll be glad you came here.

Hello to all my loving friends, and my heartfelt thanks to everyone for your support. I mean that with all my heart. I'm finally believing I can count on you.:h

[Sarah42]

Newbies Nest

well...I wasn't totally abstinent last night. (sorry Dila), but I DID do something I've never done before...I poured out a glass of wine in the sink and didn't touch another drop. It's weird- I had like 2 drinks w/o even realizing what I was doing b/c I was so stressed (and just busy). It's like there was no thought behind it at all. Then when I realized what I was doing ...I thought "crap! I'm not doing this tonight!". So I threw it out and fixed me a big ole' sammy!

After talking to a friend, hubby, and dealing with everyday stuff..I sat down and reflected on those 2 drinks I had.
It's apparent to me that grabbing a drink has become so much of a habit....it's not even a thought process. I was so consumed in my own 'thinking' atm I didn't even give the AL a 'place'. (for lack of a better term)

I was on the phone..yada yada yada...

Once I had a moment of peace...is when I threw it out. I gotta find a way to break the cycle. It also showed me I'm way worse off than I thought I was.

Love,

Sarah

[Sarah42]

Newbies Nest

Just read this on FB and thought I would share:

"The view you have of yourself and the consequent beliefs you hold of who you think you are have repercussions in your entire being and behavior. But... you need to know what your own beliefs of yourself are in the first place. Then... you need to begin to ask if you think these are changeable or malleable. The more flexible you are about your beliefs, the more likely you will find change possible, and the more likely you can create the realities you desire."

Pretty poignant ..

[Lavande]

Newbies Nest

Good morning Nesters,

Hello & welcome Wagmore! Congrats on your 32 AF days!!!
Glad you decided to join us

Juja, do a meditation every single night, I did. I think they eventually seep in to your subconscious & start to change the way you think & feel. Glad you were able to chat with your therapist a bit.

Sarah, drinking wine had become habitual for me as well. When I quit I vowed to buy no more & I haven't. If it was in the house I would have given in to it without any forethought. Think about ridding your house of all AL at least for now until you become stronger in your quit. I still don't have any in my house after 5+ years - no need

Wishing everyone a great AF Tuesday!

Lav

[Cherokeer]

Newbies Nest

Day 6 Not even wanting it. Yippee!

[Samstone]

Newbies Nest

Morning everybody!!
Sarah, until you have decided you mean your quit, you will continue to drink. Excuses are a dime a dozen and old man booze doesn't mind you using them one bit. It is great you poured it out. Now pour the whole damn bottle out, give it away, be rid of it. You owe it nothing. You owe yourself your quit.
Sam

[Byrdlady]

Newbies Nest

Wags! Welcome! Wow, 32 days, I owe you an honorary hat!!!
:goodtime:
Please accept this small token of a big job!!! 30 days doesn't just happen, it takes grit and determination! It takes a solid PLAN of how to cope with people and situations. If you have any words of wisdom for the nest, we are all ears! We are so glad you're here!

@48, you are just a baby! I wish I had a redo at 48!! I would go on for the next 3 years writhing in the grip of AL....life truly began when I was able to stop the cycle!!! Stay close, welcome aboard!

Cherokeer! Tomorrow you will get your 7 day MOON! You won't want to miss that! So happy for you!

Keep on going everyone! Just one more day....give it one more day and you will be amazed at what happens. Your control gets stronger and AL's gets weaker. Don't quit before the magic happens! I promise it happens or I wouldn't still be here!

Strength to all today!

[DNEMO]

Newbies Nest

I survived. I took all I had to not pick up any alcohol yesterday. I was extremely agitated and anxious. I ended up putting myself in bed early because I didn't know what else to do and that seemed like a safe place to be (even though I couldn't sleep). ...at peace this morning and hoping for more strength today.

[Juja]

Newbies Nest

Good job, Dnemo. I hope today is better.

I get it, Sarah, how we go for it automatically. I poured 2/3 of a bottle down the sink last night. I'm glad I did.

Everyone send some patience to me this week. I have to work all week with a LOUD co-worker who talks incessantly-- this woman speaks her every thought. Plus, she's very bossy. God, give me strength.

[Byrdlady]

Newbies Nest

Dnemo, GREAT JOB!!! It's a battle of wills!!

Juja, I had someone like that come in to help me train a customer a couple weeks ago....I mean NO THOUGHT WENT UNSPOKEN! It was insane! There is a disease of that, and my lady sure had it. I feel your pain.....good luck ...I was never so happy to put someone on a plane in my life! xxoo, B

[ToMyHealth]

Newbies Nest

Juja, Byrdy I feel your pain! I describe it as EVERY BRAIN WAVE COMES OUT THEIR MOUTH. Drives me nuts on the golf course. But remember someone like that from my workdays too. You don't even know if you should be listening.

TMH

[Sanguinestarfish]

Newbies Nest

You gals were right!

Tapering doesn't work. I only drank less because I didn't have more in the house! So today will be n?mero uno. By chance I have my yearly physical and think I am going to let my doctor in on what is going down. I have had a very, very rough past five years but the past two have been full of dearly fought and won battles.

Got divorced, moved, joined a gym (have been seeing a personal trainer for a year), and quit smoking. Still having panic attacks but feel ready to tackle the drinking. I am worried. All of my friends drink.

Weds we go out to dinner. I will be ordering club soda on the rocks with a lime. Anyway my last child finished his Master's and is starting a great job in a different state this month. Time to make me a priority.
Starfish