Newbies Nest

[Ginger999]

Newbies Nest

Thanks, Pav Do you know the name of the podcast NS posted. I'd love to give it a listen.

[Orimus]

Newbies Nest

DD - We are here for you when you need. Love and light in dealing with this latest challenge. You're bigger than cancer.

[wagmore]

Newbies Nest

Ginger999;1670146 wrote: Thanks, Pav Do you know the name of the podcast NS posted. I'd love to give it a listen.

Ginger - Congrats on Day 36! Today was 39 for me, so you and DD and I are all around the same time.

Here's the post from NS (hopes it's ok I copied her text - the original post was a few pages back) with the podcast - I just listened earlier today and highly recommend it!

From NS: "I know that Pav has mentioned this podcast before in the nest but in case any of you missed it, this is a really clear explanation about addiction and its effects on our brains, why repeated day ones for many people are part of the process, why people should try not to get discouraged but why they also should not treat relapses lightly, etc. It is informative and ultimately, very encouraging: The Bubble Hour: Special Guest, Dr. John Kelly: Changing the Stigma of Addiction Through Science. According to the speaker, the majority of people who try to quit ultimately will . Several MWOers have listened to this and found it valuable. I've listened a few times and learned something new each time. Anyway, hope you have a listen!"

[Ginger999]

Newbies Nest

Thanks, Wag!

[Just Sarah]

Newbies Nest

Hi. I'm a newbie. I made it 48 (plus) hours and failed tonight. So much to say, but I'm wondering if anyone can comment on ways to combat that well-intentioned (and, in my case, miserable failure) to make it 72 hours and beyond. I had the best intentions this am. Then, all I could do during my afternoon meeting from 4:30 to early evening was think about the drink I was going to have when I got home. And that's exactly what I did. An entire six pack of beer. So disapointed. What to do now? afraid exactly the same thing will happen if I do this again starting tomorrow. I may make it 48 hours, maybe 72--or even a whole week. But I know cravings will rear their ugly head again in short order, and I don't know how to get past what I gave in to (again) tonight. It's always the same thing, different day/ different week. What to do??

[Ginger999]

Newbies Nest

Sarah, You are doing what you are going to do first thing when you get home from work. Come here and start posting. Fix that AF drink, sit down and post/read here. I know exactly what you mean about starting to to think about the "drink" at 4:30p. Did that literally for years. It shaped my evening plans. Too many missed events because I chose to go home and get started drinking instead of going to a game or program for my gkids. If I went instead, I was pissed off that I had to go, my drink was waiting. Don't focus on what just happened, live in the moment as much as you can. I'll be looking for you tomorrow! You can do this!

[Just Sarah]

Newbies Nest

Ginger--thank you!! You've replied to me several times. So many thanks!! I'm so freightened! Do you think if I start posting when I get home, ppl will respond? I'm so afraid I will cave in in short notice! You must think I'm such a terrible "wimp." I so hate failing over and over and over...
thanks in advance for all of your support!

[Orimus]

Newbies Nest

Sarah, been fighting insomnia for years so will be here if you need. Plus there are members worldwide checking in so someone is always listening. I know it's hard but let go of those fears. Just post if you need to. When in doubt just post it whatever it is.

[satz123]

Newbies Nest

Just Sarah;1670171 wrote: Ginger--thank you!! You've replied to me several times. So many thanks!! I'm so freightened! Do you think if I start posting when I get home, ppl will respond? I'm so afraid I will cave in in short notice! You must think I'm such a terrible "wimp." I so hate failing over and over and over...
thanks in advance for all of your support!

Hi Sarah - we've ALL been there - remember that.
Just popped into Nest for a gawk.
I am on line most days all day -in & out - not sure what timezone you are in -but deffo always someone around.
Keep posting & reading - THAT is the secret.

[Darkest Diamond]

Newbies Nest

Absolutely fed up, I can cope with the surgery (that will happen tomorrow) I have got my head around that, I know that the recovery can take quite a long time , everyone is different. I can almost cope with the idea of chemotherapy, as the hair does usually grow back after treatment. I know other effects of chemo as have read extensively and know others going through it right now.

The thing I can't cope with is that after the surgery, after the chemo I then have to go on a pill that blocks Oestrogen from my body as my cancer feeds on Oestrogen! I know that I have to be on this pill for five years. Many of the side effects I will be able to cope with. Two extremely common side effects of this drug are hair thinning/loss and also osteoporosis (bones thinning and snapping). When these things happen they are permanent. These are two things that I feel I can't cope with. (I do not mind losing a breast or if it comes to it both of them )but I do mind losing my hair and ability to walk, I love walking for miles and miles, that has always been a great joy for me.

The tears are just pouring out of me, I coped very well up until this point, I accepted the surgery totally, did not moan or cry, kept the fear at bay, I just focussed on being healthy and learning more about the exercises that I could do afterwards to aid recovery.

I am going to have counselling for all of this ..... I know all about the wigs and the scarves blah blah blah but I would have to face myself bald, then with those****** drugs that I will have to take I might very well have permanent baldness/hair thinning where my scalp is clearly visibile, I have seen women like this and my heart always goes out to them . Also hate the thought of my bones thinning/snapping and the pain/loss of movement this can cause.

The answers to this problem are:-
1. Live in the moment, deal with each thing as it happens.
2. Keep as healthy as possible, good diet etc
3. Pray and meditate
4. Surround myself with love
5. Remember that there are people who have worse problems than this.
6. Be grateful that these treatments should stop cancer spreading to other areas of my body ( and if it spread to other areas of my body it would sooner or later kill me).
7. Have cancer related counselling, individually and group breast cancer counselling
8. Look for complimentary holistic remedies
9. Consider spiritual healing
10. Read escapist books, watch tv, divert mind from it.
11. Study and learn more about all the things I am passionate about.
12. Return to work, when I am able
13. Treasure and have gratitude for all the good things in my life

There is a possibility that I will be given the spiritual strength to deal with this from God. Some beautiful loving force (God) in the world took away my desire to drink so may be I will be given some sort of resources to cope with this!!

At the moment I am absolutely fed up. Tomorrow I go into surgery, will be in for a few days so I won't have access to this forum. Thank you to everyone on here for all the well wishes, I do believe it helps, I believe in the power of prayer, over the years I have prayed for others and I like to know that right now people are praying for me/sending me good vibes/healing thoughts.

I will not continue to post at this length on here about cancer as this is not a cancer forum but at this stage I just needed to do this as it is so central to my life, xx

[roxane]

Newbies Nest

DD, it sounds like a last straw, or at least that your mind is having to have an outlet to worry, so this is it.

have you had your bone density tested? it MAY go thinner, but if you have a good density to start......

i know that mcmillans now has a phone service that you can call which is obviously dedicated to cancer care and the emotional turmoil it can cause. ask your consultant/doctor if you need to be referred to them.

continue to post all you want DD, we want to support you if you want us to.

erm, a lot of 'wants' there, its early!

[available]

Newbies Nest

Oh DD I am not religious at all but I have said a prayer for you.talk on here all you want we are here to listen. Keep positive as you can and yes there r people worse off than you but at the moment it's about you and my thoughts are with you. Big hugs DD. You are a valued friend on mwo and be strong, we will b here and waiting. Xx

[Orimus]

Newbies Nest

DD these are not great options but in the end you get to decide. If you let this thing beat you, if you let it take the glorious you then you can not make any more decisions. You can not look at that list and say this is what I would like to do, the path I choose to follow. There are so many stories of doctor's being wrong once the patient has decided that they are fed up with the usual line . . . . Keep on living and you have a choice, the other way the choices are made for you. Give up and accept the usual line and the choices are made for you. Every day you breathe is another day to make a difference in your life, the lives of your family and even of strangers. Read and reread the quote in my signature. You are an example. In the end this is an enormous challenge asking you to be that much stronger, that much better of a person and we are all hear rooting for you or whatever you need.

[Booze Blues]

Newbies Nest

Dear DD,
I am here and am listening. You need to get a 2nd, 3rd, 80th opinion for drs and treatments if neccessary. My situation is not the same or as serious as yours but in the last 2 wks I have seen 16 drs. I have been feeling a little down and lacking hope but tomorrow I will see another dr and this one will be able to give me something to be hopeful about I am sure! You too need to find a dr and treatment that suits you! We are all different and respond to different treatments , there is no one thing that fixes all. Wishing you the best and hoping you find peace and wellness. Big Hug!

[Sarah42]

Newbies Nest

NoSugar;1669952 wrote: Hi,

I know that Pav has mentioned this podcast before in the nest but in case any of you missed it, this is a really clear explanation about addiction and its effects on our brains, why repeated day ones for many people are part of the process, why people should try not to get discouraged but why they also should not treat relapses lightly, etc. It is informative and ultimately, very encouraging: The Bubble Hour: Special Guest, Dr. John Kelly: Changing the Stigma of Addiction Through Science. According to the speaker, the majority of people who try to quit ultimately will . Several MWOers have listened to this and found it valuable. I've listened a few times and learned something new each time. Anyway, hope you have a listen!

just listened to this...WOW!! Great info and good discussion!