Newbies Nest

[Londoner]

Newbies Nest

Hey guys - quick one. My friend wants to get out to a pub.

I want to get out and socialise more. In fact, I'm more of a hermit when I binge on weekends - due to guilt and what not.

I really want to broaden my social horizons. Maybe not so soon.

[NoSugar]

Newbies Nest

Hi, Londoner

I think you're right that this is too soon. Go back and reread your posts -- the same thing has happened to you each time you've gone out to soon. You're young -- there are years and years of socializing soberly ahead of you if you just hang tough now.

All the best, NS

[Londoner]

Newbies Nest

Yep, think I'm gonna stay in. Feel like a bit of a fraud saying 'I'm out already' so I don't have to go out.

But at the end of the day, that road will lead me to drinking at some point. New hobbies needed. I can still socialise with my current group, just not in that setting.

[Pavati]

Newbies Nest

MAE, All:

Londoner - I agree with NS - too soon. Maybe your friend will walk, go to a music shop, movie or something else with you? Getting out doesn't necessarily mean to a pub, right?

Way to go, Kensho. I would say that is the biggest AHA moment in being sober - all the times I thought I was "sober" but alcohol appears to have had an influence nonetheless.

Good to see you swing by, Cherokeer, and I agree - why was I wasting time with that?

Sarah - I agree with Kensho's analogy - why in the world would you keep drinking alcohol with all of those other problems? You will not get support or permission for that here, as Lav says. You ask for help but you don't appear to be trying to quit alcohol which is what this site is all about.

Mo3 - Tired and cranky! Try to take care of yourself as best you can. Have you read Mrs. D is Going Without? She quit with three young children - maybe you can relate. Click on the tab about the first month...

Off to hang out with my youngest - I think we'll head to the beach even though it is foggy and cold - normal Northern California July weather. Happy Friday, everyone. Just another day.

Pav

[allankay]

Newbies Nest

Londoner;1683712 wrote: Yep, think I'm gonna stay in. Feel like a bit of a fraud saying 'I'm out already' so I don't have to go out.

But at the end of the day, that road will lead me to drinking at some point. New hobbies needed. I can still socialise with my current group, just not in that setting.

Good on you Londoner.

Giving up drinking I also found a new hobby. In my case it was photography. Now two years later I opened my own business around this hobby.

So use your free time to explore new horizons!

AK

[momofthree]

Newbies Nest

Londoner;1683712 wrote: Yep, think I'm gonna stay in. Feel like a bit of a fraud saying 'I'm out already' so I don't have to go out.

But at the end of the day, that road will lead me to drinking at some point. New hobbies needed. I can still socialise with my current group, just not in that setting.

I know personally I would be too weak right now to go to a setting like that and not drink. I'm avoiding a family BBQ this weekend because everyone there will be drinking and eating and I'm not up for it yet. The family will be a little put out, but really they will get over it. For once I need to think about myself and be selfish, I need not to drink and don't need the temptation. Be strong! It's hard, but don't put yourself in those situations yet if you don't feel solid about it.

[allankay]

Newbies Nest

So hot in London. It is over 30 degrees and I feel like my skin is melting off.

There are crowds of people outside of pubs and bars cooling of with a beer. I used to find that hot weather gave me the urge to drink. Today I passed only thinking to myself how can these people (in suits) be able to drink at lunch time?

So two years later I have no cravings for alcohol what so ever. The only trace of the old habbit that is left in me are the ever present dreams about drinking.

AK

[momofthree]

Newbies Nest

Allankey, you've been sober now for 2 years? Wow! Congrats to you, that is excellent!
It's over 30 here today as well and I had to bring the kids in because the UV was so high, I'll take them out later when it cools a bit. I don't know how men could do that either, the suits are hot to wear anyway let alone sitting outside in the heat trying to cool off with a beer.

[wagmore]

Newbies Nest

Londoner - I understand the desire to get out and socialize more - I'm in the same place - just choose wisely and protect your quit. There will always be time to socialize in the future.

Momof3 - Good for you on putting yourself first. That can be hard, especially with family and close friends. You will probably be glad about your choice once you get through the weekend AF.


On a different note, weird things happening with my view of this site. When reading posts I see what looks like the most recent posts. Then when I go to write a reply, if I scroll down I see a bunch of additional posts in between others I'd seen in my "read" view. For example, when reading I saw the "going out" post from Londoner and the replies from NS and Mo3. When I started to reply, the additional post from Londoner plus the ones from AK and Pav appeared. Anyone else having this issue?

[Ginger999]

Newbies Nest

Wag, Click on Display Mode (right side of bar). Mine is set to Linear Mode and it's displaying normally for me. Maybe yours got switch to Threaded Mode. ??

[Darkest Diamond]

Newbies Nest

Heat in London

Londoner and Allankay,
London is so so so so so hot isn't it?
One room in my flat is cool but the others are sweltering, this is the hottest I think I have ever known it to be, hope it cools off at the weekend! Londoner I think not going out is a good idea at this stage. Allankay that thing of sitting outside a pub in a suit in the sun drinking alcohol...... crazy, they must all be really sweating!!
DD x

[KENSHO]

Newbies Nest

Feeling very distracted and unproductive so far today, which is bumming me out - typical cure? A drink. It's also Friday, and the sun is shining, and my left thumb hurts... a drink? I think I'll try grabbing a soda water, cleaning my desk, and then maybe going for a run.

[Rahulthesweet]

Newbies Nest

Hello Nesters,

Last 10 to 12 days my life has become like a roller coaster. As one rides in coaster there were extreme tense moments, lows, fast moving problems, new business opportunities and virtually no time. Problems, issues, challenges and work work work.

If I see the 2 problems which came to my notice about 10 days back. But same unchanged as of today morning. One problem vanished today (thank GOD) second will tomorrow but if I analyse my state of mind day one I was super tensed so much so I could not sleep. I recall I was going to bangkok that day and arriving 2 AM and unable to sleep whole night tensed and thinking. More tense moments next few days. But one thing as I see now . Problem was same from day one but how I perceived it was totally different from one day to another.

I am so glad in this such and extreme roller coater life I am having now a days full of action. I am not going towards AL. Yesterday for example I realised I had to go to South Korea. Then along with that to taiwan. So tomorrow I fly off travelling for next 5 days with a peace of mind.

[wagmore]

Newbies Nest

Ginger999;1683764 wrote: Wag, Click on Display Mode (right side of bar). Mine is set to Linear Mode and it's displaying normally for me. Maybe yours got switch to Threaded Mode. ??

Hi Ginger - Thanks for your suggestions. I checked it out, but mine is also set to linear mode. It's very strange, but not a huge problem I guess. Just weird that messages don't appear and then do appear in between others.

doo doo doo doo (in comes Rod Serling... )

[KENSHO]

Newbies Nest

So, how long does it take for the anxiety to go away? Is it from quitting AL or maybe that is the reason I drank in the first place? Rough day.