Newbies Nest

[whitemarshmom]

Newbies Nest

1st day of out of town sounds right for me. im going to take my workout stuff. im making a plan. damn that hotel, i know they sell those little ponys right in the sundry shop.. Ill make sure im ready..! you all are inspirational Thanks! :h

[j-vo]

Newbies Nest

Kensho,
I tell myself to avoid situations where the focus is beer, but if you look at this differently, the focus can easily be changed to a great bike-ride, cardio, feeling great! Take your own drinks, things that you may like or even google special AF drinks. Focus on the fun with others and not the beer. I know, easier said than done. But this is one of those things that if it's gonna interfere with your early sobriety, then could you cancel and use the excuse you're sick? That's if you feel wobbly about the whole thing.

[Starfish1]

Newbies Nest

WMM

Be sure when you get to your room in the evenings, go straight ahead and get into your pj's. Take all your makeup off....wash your hair even....apply a facial mask, too. Do whatever you can to make it so you won't want to get dressed again and go downstairs to the bar or the sundry shop!

[whitemarshmom]

Newbies Nest

Kensho, since my children are pointing out to me almost daily that i was crazy the night before and im apologizing for my behavior and asking what i did in a most subtle way, ie asking them if they liked the corn on the cob i made with dinner and not even sure if we ate it, checking the trash and fridge. wondering where it went, if there are dishes in the sink then i can be pretty sure we ate dinner. DH and i are as separated as 2 people can possibly be. he lives in the basement and doesnt eat in the house. .. very little involvement in the kids lives, lots of dirty looks, he must be perfect.. NOT.. the most self centered , un forgiving , un understanding person , blames me for everything.. cant wait til he comes home and finds out my daughter has head lice ( just discovered this today) it will be my fault, i dont clean the house, i dont do this , i dont do that. more guilt, whether realistic or not leads to more drinking. I want to leave so badly, but am so so so afraid, afraid he will use my AL to take the kids, afraid of the recent changes at work, ( new CEO , and potential layoffs) , afraid ill be broke and have to come crawling back ( i would rather die)

ok sorry Kensho, i was starting to answer your question as i sit here and got off track. anyway, i tell the kids the truth, i tell them it is not their fault, i tell them i am not perfect, and that i am hurting myself and them by drinking too much, but i dont mean to drink too much, i say its a sickness and i have to get better. they seem to understand and be empathetic.. I am the youngest (47 years old) of 7 kids, my mom was an AL and some of the older kids never got hooked.. I'm planning on this quit before my son starts football practice August 1st
6pm to 8pm every night til school starts, yeah thats going to kick my butt and help me stay busy if i can get past the early in the day cravings, that are starting now......

[Starfish1]

Newbies Nest

whitemarshmom;1685587 wrote: if i can get past the early in the day cravings, that are starting now......

WMM- EAT SOMETHING!!! I promise this will stop your cravings. Have you had lunch?

[whitemarshmom]

Newbies Nest

Star - Great suggestions , on going directly to room Thankfully this hotel doesnt have a bar , just a little breakfast lunch bistro style type thing, it also does not have room service, another helpful thing. i havent had lunch yet, i just got out of the shower with a tea tree oil shampoo mix, im going to find a laundromat to wash in hot hot water all these sheets and blankets a previous post i posted, said just discovered head lice on my 6 year old. ugh

[Starfish1]

Newbies Nest

That's a pain about the lice. One of mine got it when she was in second grade. Yep, whole family treatment, tons of laundry, etc. I remember what a horror that was. Expensive too! We had to buy some kind of spray, it seems for the furniture and all get new bed pillows....what a freakin' nightmare. I promise you will feel better if you try to eat something healthy before going to the laundromat. Good luck!

[whitemarshmom]

Newbies Nest

back from laundromat, i did stop and had one so far, my quit day is ahead of me..and i am looking forward to it! I like that you all have encouraged a plan, and quit day.. Washed all the blankets, sheets, bought new pillows at big lots.. $ 3 a piece. long overdue anyway.. Thats one of the things i love about staying in a hotel next week, the big fluffy pillows and a bed ALL TO MYSELF! I dont have a bedroom per say in this house, DH sleeps downstairs and I sleep with my kids.. our old bedroom turned into a play room... we play musical beds at night, so nobody really gets a good night sleep, something has got to change, but i see a great opporunity for making my 1st 3 days AF while i am out of town

[available]

Newbies Nest

Ginger happy 80th girl, wow that has gone so fast. I like you used to look at others days and think that there was no way in this world i could get those numbers up but i am 230+ days and i now look and think it is not long till 1 whole year. Me, alky Ava, not drinking, no thoughts of drinking (very few), has done it, just like you have Ginger. Im very proud of you.

Weary Happy birthday and a happy sober birthday. Nothing like celebrating a birthday sober. I celebrated my 50th sober, the first in, i cant remember. I could never remember celebrating my birthday, i was always drunk and passed out. Sad but true.

Kensho, my children are my support network. The have supported from from day 1, they never thought i would or could stop drinking and for me, i had to do it for myself and them. They are so proud of what i have achieved and i know i could never have that 1st drink and have to tell them or look them in the eyes and see their hurt and disappointment.

White, there is never a good day to stop drinking, ever! I had every excuse to pick next week, the week after, i had to go out on this day, friends were coming over on this day, it was the weekend, there was a day ending in a Y. I picked the 1st of December for some reason and December is the month of family, celebrations galore but i did it, i had to. I also have four children aged from 27 to 20 and i may not have been the best mum but i will be the best nana in the world and my grandchildren will never have to see a drunk nana and i hope with all my heart i have broken the cycle of alcoholism in our family.

Keep sober everyone, it is well worth waking up daily to appreciate life instead of dreading the day until the next drink.

[Lavande]

Newbies Nest

Good evening Nesters,

In the middle of a thunderstorm, not sure if the power is going to stay on.

Ginger, Congrats on your 80 AF days - yay!
Happy birthday weary

WMM, sorry to head about the lice thing - what a pain but not highly unusual with school age kids.
Get yourself started on your AF journey, the sooner the better.
Byrdie, hope you are OK, thinking of you :l

Wishing a safe night in the nest for all!

Lav

[KENSHO]

Newbies Nest

Just checking in for the evening. Great night sober. I'm finding so much happiness in small things.

[wagmore]

Newbies Nest

KENSHO;1685751 wrote: Just checking in for the evening. Great night sober. I'm finding so much happiness in small things.

This is great Kensho. The more you can nurture this "happiness in small things" the easier it will be to maintain your quit. Glad to see/hear that you seem to be bouncing back and gaining strength.

[KENSHO]

Newbies Nest

Thanks Wag!

[Sarah42]

Newbies Nest

frances;1685124 wrote: Sarah the frustration is here because you have been saying you are doing this and doing that (reading the book, devising your plan, etc) for weeks now. It is not clear when you feel you will be ready - yesterday you said tomorrow you would have the awful drink which will be your last. So that tomorrow is now today! Are you going to do it?

Sorry I wasn't able to. A family 'problem' came up, and we were not able to make it to the package store before it closed. Now my stepdaughter is here, and I wasn't going to try it with her here. As some of you may recall, she has a mental disorder, and she sends my anxiety level to a 15 on a scale of 10. I wasn't expecting her to be here, but she does leave tomr...so maybe I can try then. (fingers crossed).

Just got other news yesterday from the lab tech at my Dr's office. All blood work came back fine, except a "slight" elevation of my liver enzymes. And ya'll know what that means! Slight or not he's gonna ask how much I drink.....and I am terrified to be honest with him about my years of abuse. Not to mention, terrified of my health. I know some meds I take for my Crohns can also cause liver problems, along with nervous conditions among other things.

Anyway, even on the anx meds...my anx is thru the roof right now.

Love,

Sarah

[Sarah42]

Newbies Nest

roxane;1685114 wrote: You are hoping to eventually try a day af, meanwhile you say you have cut down, that is good. Mods threads would be better for you Sarah, you will be welcomed with open arms.

Thank you rox- but I don't want to moderate....I want to stop.

When I started the tapering process and cut down...once I got to 4-5 drinks a night- I was like frozen! At that point, I felt (feel) like a deer in the headlights. I couldn't go further...mostly out of fear. I have done a Day 1, so I know I can do it again, and I plan to, but wow is it really tough to wrap your mind around this whole thing.

My point is...I don't want to moderate as I don't think I can....am just a point where i feel paralyzed.

Love,

Sarah