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    Newbies Nest

    See the Light,
    I'm glad you found MWO. Although there are logging problems from time to time, mostly people can get on and post. The beginning is really hard, not gonna lie. What you need to do and remember is what Ava told you. If this is going to be your AA, you've got to put the work into it. Posting, reading and posting more is what is the most important in the beginning. Reading about alcoholism, watching the documentaries, and getting a good grasp of what this disease is and does is so important to recovery. In the beginning, you're the priority. You get through your first day, then your second, and don't worry about later on. It's baby steps. Just post and don't drink. Keep your belly full! Full of whatever it is you want. Don't worry about calories or fat or sugar (sorry NS). Just fill up on food so you don't crave al. You'll make friends here and find a great support group. It's nice we have the option of this online forum as it's convenient unlike AA meetings. We can do it anytime of the day, we can find support in the middle of the night if needed. Yes, it's hard work. But what you'll receive after being AF just for a little time is amazing. And it keeps getting better and better. Stay with it, push through the cravings and thoughts. Don't let it control you anymore.
    Sometimes what you're most afraid of doing is the very thing that will set you free.

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      Newbies Nest

      Thx SF and jvo- I really want this so I am willing to try anything
      “Hope is being able to see that there is light despite all of the darkness”- Desmond Tutu


      STL

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        Newbies Nest

        Hi, Nest:

        STL - Welcome! You have gotten good advice - my advice is to listen to it! There is a lot of wisdom here in the nest. Drinking a fifth of vodka a day straight from the bottle, even while at work. Sounds like a problem to me. Cutting back will most certainly be more difficult than stopping for good. As a wise person put it to me - you have the power over alcohol as long as you're not drinking it. Once you have some, alcohol is in charge and all bets are off. I fought and fought for a long time - I wanted to moderate, to keep my best friend AL in my life. I can't tell you the relief I felt when I finally admitted to myself, the lovely people here, my counselor and my husband that I could not control my drinking and I had to stop. No more negotiating with myself - when, why, how much, with whom. Just no. As many have already said it isn't easy - but it IS simple. Don't drink no matter what. Come here for support whenever you need...

        DD - Sorry for your woes - I like your list of positives.

        Way to go, Kensho. Glad to hear you feeling so great.

        Back to work today - it was good to get going, but a little hard to revert to actually getting dressed when I wake up instead of having coffee in my PJs. So happy to return happy and rested - hangover free.

        Happy Monday, Nest.

        Pav

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          Newbies Nest

          Grocery store. Check out line. Magazine w/ a woman drinking a glass of red wine that looked, well, fabulous. THAT makes it hard. Wasn't expecting a craving to hit hard! When will this craziness stop? I'm just so sick of it.
          Kensho

          Done. Moving on to life.

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            Newbies Nest

            See the Light;1687274 wrote:
            ...wish me luck (I know it is more than luck though)

            STL
            - Welcome! I'm glad you found us and jumped in with your first few posts. You will find lots of support and advice here, almost all of it from people who have been through similar situations and overcome similar habits and temptations.

            It is definitely more than luck. Some days will be a lot of hard work, others may feel like a breeze. One thing is certain, the more AF days you get, the more you'll learn about what it takes to keep your quit (for you personally, I mean).

            Your drinking situation does indeed sound like it's reached a point where you need to make some drastic changes if your health and the safety of others (children, wife, other drivers for example) are in danger.

            Keep posting, asking questions, using this as your AA if that works for you. We're all here to support each other, help each other over the rough spots, celebrate the victories, etc.

            :huggy
            Everything you want is on the other side of fear.

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              Newbies Nest

              KENSHO;1687412 wrote: Grocery store. Check out line. Magazine w/ a woman drinking a glass of red wine that looked, well, fabulous. THAT makes it hard. Wasn't expecting a craving to hit hard! When will this craziness stop? I'm just so sick of it.
              Kensho - I'm not sure the craziness ever does stop completely. For many people, it's more an experience of the person getting stronger and wiser, while the craziness and cravings gradually diminish. However, just when you think you've got it wired, something may very well come out of the blue and surprise you.

              One thing I've noticed during my recent quit is how pervasive messages about alcohol are in most of our cultures. False messages of course, illusions. They are everywhere...
              Everything you want is on the other side of fear.

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                Newbies Nest

                Thanks WAG. Just hoping it gets easier. Sometimes it's no problem, and others it's really, really hard. It was all I could do to just go home without stopping. Once home, I proceeded to stuff my face and drink seltzer water. Now I'm feeling like a blob.

                But I'm a sober blob!!!!! Woo Hoo!!!

                Welcome SeeTheLight!
                Kensho

                Done. Moving on to life.

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                  Newbies Nest

                  Kensho, things settle down a lot after Day 13. Things still happen, but they seem more manageable after that. Even now, a thought will hit me out of the blue, but I know how to pulverize it now. This is a new skill you are learning, you get better at it every day!

                  DD, thinking of you...sending you strength.
                  SeeTheLight, welcome aboard, hope your night is going easier than you thought!
                  Sarah, hope alll is well!
                  Daevid, hang in there! No matter what!

                  Wishing everyone strength tonight. B
                  All you gotta do, is get thru this day. AF 1/20/2011
                  Tool Box
                  Newbie's Nest

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                    Newbies Nest

                    Kensho,
                    Better just a "blob" than a drunken blob. You'll be happy about your decision when you lay your head down tonight and when you wake up tomorrow. Great strength tonight!
                    Sometimes what you're most afraid of doing is the very thing that will set you free.

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                      Newbies Nest

                      Deleted everything that I had posted ..... just feel so sad right now re mice running around above me in the gap between my ceiling and neighbours floor boards. Also feel deflated and scared about imminent chemotherapy, once I have rid this flat of mice I will continue the fight for counselling, I am really annoyed that I am having to fight for this.

                      I might leave this forum for a while, not to drink or do anything negative but just to focus on getting better (from cancer) I feel I talk too much about that on here, but I can't cut it out of my life, it is part of me, at the moment it feels like all of me . Today is my birthday, it does not feel so great!!
                      New life started on 1st May 2014, One day at a time I will work at continuing it forever!

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                        Newbies Nest

                        Good evening Nesters,

                        DD, I wish you lived near me! I have extra room, no mice & lots of chickens to hug when you're feeling a little down. Please know that we are all thinking of you & wish you the very best :l

                        Hello & welcome to STL!
                        Stay close to the nest, stick to your plan & you'll be just fine

                        Kensho, reminders are always going to be out there. I suggest taking the 'importance' off of them. Just become an 'observer' of things then turn your attention to something else. Distraction is the key to success around here!

                        Hello to everyone & wishing a safe night in the nest for all!

                        Lav
                        AF since 03/26/09
                        NF since 05/19/09
                        Success comes one day at a time :thumbs:

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                          Newbies Nest

                          Hello Nesters, it's been the week from hell. Thought I would jump on real quick since I haven't had time. Realized I was on day 60 today. POUND IT!!! Which is hilarious tonight because my daughter started to leave without her nearly full bottle of wine and I ran down the road with it yelling at her to this "crap" home I've Had a bad week. LOL How's that for superior dorkiness.

                          If that is not dorky enough I was discussing with my college student what super power I would like to have. Mine would be to catch peoples hair on fire with the sheer power of my mind. Triggered of course by my disturbingly hilarious sense of humor. Yeah I went there. LOL

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                            Newbies Nest

                            "It's four in the morning" sounds like a Leonard Cohen song!

                            Thank you to everyone who has helped me on this forum, I have felt great love, still do. It has helped me through the toughest time of my life. I am feeling very unhappy at the moment, lots of darkness and repetitive negative thought patterns re mice and also cancer.
                            So I say goodbye (for a bit, few days/ months however long it takes) but I will still post in roll call xxxxx
                            New life started on 1st May 2014, One day at a time I will work at continuing it forever!

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                              Newbies Nest

                              DD, Don't leave us! That's why we are here! If you feel like it start your own thread and we can follow you there, like what MHP is doing. It might help you feel better if the thread was about your journey. Just please don't go dark on us.

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                                Newbies Nest

                                DD. Only you can walk through your shoes, but I hope it is not without others by your side. It is the darkest times when we need the light of others - we all need support, ESPECIALLY when we feel weak, withdrawn, sad, etc. Please know that you have a group of people sending you the utmost support. Have you thought about finding a cancer support group also?
                                Kensho

                                Done. Moving on to life.

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