Newbies Nest

[Guitarista]

Newbies Nest

blackflag;1698851 wrote: And not forgetting well done G!!!!
Thanks friend. Good to see you here.

jenniech;1698857 wrote: just spent last 1.5 hours reading tool box
going to bed sober for first time in a LONG time
good night!!!!!

Onya Jennie.

Leighann111;1698861 wrote: Black flag...... I too love irn bru :-)

I love any kind of bru without booze innit Leighann!

Good to see you. Welcome.

G

[Pie]

Newbies Nest

Congrats on your 30 days, Mr. G! So happy to celebrate it with you!

Pie :goodjob:

[LavenderBlue]

Newbies Nest

Hey all, quiet today because cleaning - not a bad thing. I used to have a little meditation corner set up in my room, years ago. Took it all down when the ex...well, his family didn't approve. No one told me to take it all down, but I did. So I've been cleaning out the room a bit and going through the boxes where I packed away all of my stuff. It feels good - and just having some of it set up here in the computer room gives me a reminder of part of my life that I never got back to when I was finding my "solace" in drinking. Everything surrounding my interest in the spiritual used to reolve around trying to be a healthier, more balanced person. I'd like if I could find that headspace again.

Greetings to all the new faces! I'm so glad everyone is here and working towards kicking the AL out of their/our lives!

MossRose - Glad the driving comment was a nice reminder for you! I'm a bit of a hermit at heart anyway, but I had no idea how much I was letting drinking get in the way of going *anywhere* til these last couple weeks. I keep starting to procrastinate things now and then suddenly realizing, "Oh yeah...I'm sober...I can just go do that, I don't have to wait til I'm safe to drive!"

STL and Guitarista- YAY 30 days! Thanks for posting your thoughts; even when I'm quiet I'm in here reading nearly constantly most days.

one4change - That's really tough; there's already been great advice here but sending good thoughts your way. My mom (who lives with me) still has her nightly drink. I've made it clear I'll be avoiding the kitchen/living room while she does but that's easy for me to say since I rent the downstairs and I can "hide" pretty easily.

And that's it for my quick checkin - I have a few more things I want to finish before I head to sleep tonight. Best of luck to all!

[one4change]

Newbies Nest

Thank you for the welcome everyone! Tomorrow is a new day. I just need to find a way to not quit on myself. Think I'll head to the toolbox. I'm heading out of town and hope to stay strong. GN

[KENSHO]

Newbies Nest

Howdy everyone!
STL, I'd just like to say WAY TO GO!! And that hat looks really good on you GUITARISTA.

Jenniech, great job getting through that craving - you came, you read, you posted, and you kicked AL's arse! Each time you do that, you will be stronger and the next will be easier.

Hello One4 and Overit. Glad you joined us.

LAV2, great to see you are still hangin' strong. Keep up the great work!

PAV, loved that bubble hour. And thanks to everyone else for your thoughts on the spouse thing. I think the hubs is a bit of all the things you mentioned - confused, threatened, uncomfortable, etc. He mentioned that I've been "flat". I have been very inward and guarded to my process, which I think is necessary. Emotions and thoughts have been chaotic and I have tried not to share them with him for fear they would overwhelm him, and I've also felt rather vulnerable. I asked him to be patient with me until my emotions even out a bit more. He also mentioned that he "thought" he heard me say that he was the cause of my drinking in the past. I made it very clear that I was the cause of my drinking, and that I did it sometimes to numb stress, which at times included stress from conflict we had. I could tell he was relieved that I was not blaming him, but terrified that I may not be as silent any more when I am upset.

On a brighter note, I remembered this afternoon how much light-heartedness and sense of humor help with coping, and the mood shifted to an evening of enjoying family.

Keep up the good fight everyone. If you are here, you have taken steps to change your life. Keep at it. It's not easy, but it's not even close to impossible. You all have what it takes; you just have to be willing to be a little uncomfortable and honest with yourself - and the great changes start to happen!!! You can ALL do this!

[KENSHO]

Newbies Nest

On another note... working late tonight. Fighting the old urges to grab a few shots. That would involve sneaking to the basement past husband, shooting straight from the bottle and getting slower and slower at my work - then eventually going to bed with as much done as I would get without booze, and turning back to hubs so he couldn't smell me. How disgusting. POINT: AL would not help me, and it would foster deceit, self-depreciation, a hangover, and such horrible disappointment that I ruined 22 AF days.

But I DO hate working at night. I'm going to list the things to be done and estimate the time and try to meet it. Get it done quickly so I can get to bed... sweet bed.

[Pavati]

Newbies Nest

MAE, all:

Wow - very busy here today.

Overit - so glad you came back. You, too, Jennie. You are both people who I was following when I was lurking here, and believe it or not (because of how you might feel RIGHT NOW), you both helped me get sober. I'm glad to be here with you now to help you out. Great riding that urge, Jennie.

I felt the same thing you describe - there were some things I heard over and over but didn't really GET until I was in the right frame of mind. That's why some of the time I just did what people told me to do, whether I believed in it or not. I wasn't trusting my own decisions and knew they had had success.

G! So happy to celebrate 30 with you. Love that attitude and your thoughtful, cheery disposition. Keep on rocking it!

STL! You are doing great - I love your thoughtful posts, too. Sometimes we have the tradition in the nest of speechifying the first 30 days. Any thoughts to offer those just starting out? Words of wisdom?

As for moods, Kensho, I took particular notice tonight of how much more even I am at home - I fight much less with kids and husband, and I am less prone to the severe downs I used to have. Add yet another thing to the VERY LONG plus column on the sober T chart (actually, I can't think of one minus - as K9 says, no one ever wakes up wishing they'd had something to drink the night before).

Happy Hump Day, Nest. Hang tight all you new newbies - sober is where it's at.

Pav

[Daisy38]

Newbies Nest

Good morning all,

Black Flag I am a fan of the lush orange bubbles that is Iron Bru the diet type is my preference like you I am english

Jenny well done on making it through a stressful night you sounded really proud and rightly so!

Guitarists - congratulations on 30 days AF and earning your hat wear it with pride

Morning, Byrdlady, Peppersnow, Lavande

Kenosho I'm pleased you and your husband had a candid chat and I do hope it helps. At the start of my journey I too had an honest talk with my husband, one which I was very nervous about, telling him I had an AL problem was hard, he enjoyed sharing a couple of glasses of wine with me - or so I thought, he told me he could see how much I changed sometimes when drinking, he manages his al intake very well and he too was concerned about my blackouts.

Have a great day Newbies

[blackflag]

Newbies Nest

Hey guys, just a quick check in from me before I crack on with my day.
Today is my 'saturday' because I work shifts, normally I'd spend it in bed hung over, but today I'm pretty motivated to actually make some use of it for the first time in forever.
Hope everyone has a good day, I'll check back later.

B.F.

[Leighann111]

Newbies Nest

It's amazing to see people going through the same crazy thoughts and emotions, I kinda feel a little lonely sometimes (even only 4 weeks in). My partner is currently on day 2, woken up in a scrappy mood as expected so my day will be spent cleaning (I used to find that a swear word lol) and finding ways to cheer him up :-)
I will definitely log on later to read how everybody's day has gone, life is much better when you can remember it

[Sarah42]

Newbies Nest

Just sayin hi real quick. MIL has been in and out of the hospital last 2 weeks so things have been busy.

I have alot of reading back to do, but I've been trying to read when I can. I have a bone to pick in the next few hours with her last doctors, and hopefully after that I can breathe again.

Just ate peanut butter toast and gonna sleep some more, but I'll be back.

Love you all very much,

Sarah

[available]

Newbies Nest

BF its funny how we get motivated to do a lot of things when we are not focusing on where our next drink is going to come from and how we can hide our drinking and the list goes on and on.

Leigh i am with you about cleaning and when my eyes were sober it was also amazing at how i had let things go and did not care. 4 weeks does not need an "only" in front of it. 4 weeks is amazing so be very proud of those days. Feed your other half ice cream that will make him happy, take him for a walk, let him sleep, all the things we did or wanted to do.

Life is fantastic sober, LavB i find i go shopping after work and i am not racing home to drink and shut myself up from the world. Now i go shopping, grab a coffee and browse. I always put off going out due to my anxiety but it was always the al that was making me anxious. No al = no anxiety to the level i had. I find i smile when i think of the new me and shudder when i think of the old me, the one i dont want to meet again.

[Leighann111]

Newbies Nest

Could I ask some advice........ Since I've become AF, I've become very paranoid and suspicious, I also find myself totally over analysing everything, wether it's something some1 has said to me, something I've said/done. Even down to what I'm writing on here, I'm so worried about things coming out wrong I'll practise it in my head 100 times! I've convinced myself my partner is cheating (even though deep down I know he isn't) I just wondered if this is all part of the journey to stay sober or am I going crazy?? Lol

[available]

Newbies Nest

I think Leigh that it is because we are sober and seeing through sober eyes so to speak. Before we were either drunk or hungover and didnt see what was happening around us. Our brain needs time to heal and our emotions to get back on track. I was not paranoid/suspicious but i was worried about saying something wrong and if i wasnt mentioned in a post i always thought i had said the wrong thing so i suppose i was paranoid. i used to read and reread my posts and then submit. Work was the same also. As time goes on our emotions even out. Its a rollercoaster ride for a few months being sober and starting to like the person we really are. I never liked myself at all when i was drinking and now i quite like the new me. I dont feel i have to be someone i am not or pretend i am happy when i am not or given an opinion when i think it is needed. I dont hide anymore from how i feel. So the answer is NO you are not going crazy you are recovering from addiction.

[Leighann111]

Newbies Nest

Available, thank you :-) I never ever thought I could enjoy cleaning my flat and that fresh smell of bleach on my hands but I do! I guess it's just another way of keeping occupied and not thinking of the demon that wants to raise its drunken head, but hEll if it works!!
I tried taking him for a walk yesterday but bless him I think I forced him really and he felt bad and had to come home, but baby steps. He's just had a 6 day bender so he's feeling it but I know with lots of love and support he can do it :-) '