Newbies Nest

[Blownaway]

Thanks again for all the fabulous info everyone is sharing. I listened to the bubble hour podcast on relapse. OMG, that one was the best one I have listened to so far. Sooo good!

[KENSHO]

Hi Everyone. Just checking in to make some noise. So quite in the nest. I have been evaluating my long term relationship with alcohol in a way that I never have before. I will share when I can take the time to put forth the details. Hope everyone is hanging in there. This ain't easy!

[Eloise]

Nope it definitely is not easy, but worth it.
Hang on tight Kensho!

[Mr. B]

Thanks for the pink cloud STL, makes sense . I'm really starting to focus more on all this. Instead of just in one ear out the other. If you no what I mean. It is definitely not easy for me as well. Good stuff

[Pavati]

Hi, Everyone:

Way to go, El! Congratulations!

STL - I got in a funk from around 3.5 months to 6.5 months - Why me? Forever? Not just one? What will ____ be like without alcohol? My strategy, because I am a logical and linear person, was to buckle down and read/learn/listen all I could about what others had experienced, and what they did to get through. I listened to that Bubble Hour on relapse, as well as the one on PAWS (heck, I listened to them all). I came to MWO a lot. An I read as many sober blogs as I could find. Finally, I just followed in the footsteps of those here who were ahead of me - I knew from all of that research that my feelings would change, and I knew/know that dedicating some time each day to staying sober is key.

Hope you're ok, Kensho.

Happy Friday, everyone. I'm heading out for dinner and to see some live music, and I don't have even the slightest tug to drink tonight. I really never believed this would ever happen to me - I thought I would be struggling forever. So glad to report that what those nest moms say is true.

Hope you are all doing well, and have firm plans to stay sober, no matter what.

Pav

[peppersnow]

Hi folks - am doing a quick check in...am on the road and just caught up a bit. I had several drinking dreams this week which I was SO glad to awake from, but dang do they ever make my sleeping hours depressing because I spend the night upset with myself. While I sleep. What a waste of REM time. I'm hoping for something pleasant tonight...is a beach too much to ask? I'd even take one of my standard apocalypse dreams over a drunk dream again!

I hope all are doing well - does anyone know what time zone this board's clock is set at? All the recent posts that I'm seeing (7:43 p.m. where I am) say they were written yesterday. Just curious how that works.

Have a great AF weekend all!! :happy2: And Congratulations Eloise!!!! :welldone:

[Byrdlady]

Eloise! 150 days!!! Wow!
:fairy:
alas, there are no Flying Underwear to award you (such a favorite among nesters!) I hope this one will do, you have been such a blessing to us all! Thank you for your help with Prize Patrol and I always love reading your posts!!! MWO is a better place because of YOU! Well done on this great accomplishment! Keep it going, you will never be sorry!

I am so happy to be home!
My shoes disintegrated on the first leg of the trip! I was getting off the plane and walking to the next one and my shoe started getting loose. i noticed the sides were coming apart! I went a little further and it became clear my shoe was failing! I needed to find another pair! I went into a Johnson Murphy store and their least expensive pair was $168! I went to a newsstand, no flip flops or anything. I passed by a security checkpoint and asked if he had some tape! He did and we taped the shoe onto my foot. I was back in business! Until the other shoe blew also! I went into a chocolate store and they had some tape also, so we taped up the other shoe, too. I was grateful, but mortified to walk down the concourse of Charlotte IntL Airport with packing tape holding my shoes on my feet. It was humiliating, but I didnt want to go barefooted! YUCK! My brother and his wife were there to pick me up, a wonder that they would claim me in such a state! Thank goodness I had thrown another pair in my suitcase. I thought i had taken them out.
The training was intense. This was the third session of its kind, and it had been reduced from 4 days down to two. It was brutal, but much-needed. Our big dinner out was a reminder of why I am so happy to be sober. There were about 20 of us in attendance, 3 females. I have been with the company 27 years, most of us have long tenure. There were just 2 of us not drinking. My company, when it was in its hayday, hired ex jocks....big burly Men's Men! Hard hitting young salespeople with passion and energy. As I looked around the room, I would dare to say all of us have AL problems. They now looked old, fat, and out of shape. You should have heard the grumbling when our meeting went past 5 oclock. Ours is a pressure cooker of a job, and AL is an easy way to relieve that, you could sure see it that night at dinner. Being sober among them felt good. Like I had something I KNOW they wish they had. I laughed and carried on and had confidence in doing so. I didnt need AL to fit in with them. I was so glad NOT to be drinking! Most of them felt ROUGH the following morning. Somebody passed around a bottle of Advil. I have to tell you, i was very proud of myself and what I have accomplished.

Glad to be home! I missed checking in here adequately and reading what my friends are doing! Stay safe tonight! Xxoo, Byrdie

[Lavande]

Good evening Nesters,

Hope everyone is having a restful & peaceful Friday night

Byrdie, sorry about the shoe incident but honestly - you made me smile. I could just picture you in taped on shoes
Glad to hear you survived your meeting & dinner too. I don't plan to ever attend anything like that again - boring.

Eloise, Congrats to your on your 5 months AF - great job!!!

Wishing everyone a safe night in the nest. The temps will be dropping quite a bit this weekend so we may have to break out the nest blankets

Lav

[Cherokeer]

Awesome EL on your 5 months! :welldone:

[mimi911]

:sad::sad::sad:It's been a long time since I've checked in. I am sober and thankful for that but emotionally falling apart. This divorce is killing me. There are days when I don't know how I am going to survive or even if I want to.
That being said, alcohol wasn't helping so what's the point?

I have never had depression or panic attacks but it seems to be the new me. I try to control them but it doesn't seem to help. I am exercising and eating healthy in the desperate hope that eventually it will pay off.

All for now, glad to see old friends still here and doing well.

[MossRose]

Hi all. Been absent again for a while, but not for nefarious reasons. Still dealing with lots of cancer-related things in my life. Tonight was good. My SIL and I went Christmas shopping tonight (she has to go back into the hospital for 6 weeks and wanted to get it done!) and then we went to dinner. Lots of laughs. I am feeling grateful tonight. Still waiting on my brother's biopsy results. Yes - it's been all about cancer lately. At least I'm sober and present for those I love. Wish I had more time to be present for everyone here. I'm hoping that things will calm down soon, and I can get back to normal. Until then, forgive me. I just wanted to check in and stay accountable. I still struggle.

edit: Hi mimi911. We haven't met yet, so just wanted to say hi. Your post really resonated with me. I just went through a divorce myself. It was pretty awful. Hang in there, my friend. It does get better.

[Pinecone]

Hi friends, great to see everyone posting.

Kensho, sending you support! We are always here if you need to bounce ideas off us. Some even have thick heads like me so you can watch how high it bounces.

Byrdie, loved the shoes story. Thanks for the smile! I always felt like one of those guys you described, drinking but very jealous of someone confidently sober. What a real treat to actually get to be one. AF life is such a blessing.

Mimi, I'm sorry you are going through that right now but boy do you have your head on straight! Sending you support!

I hope everyone remembers not to make any deals with that devil. The game is totally rigged. Get grateful, it is an action you can take not just some vaguefeeling. It will save your butt!

[MossRose]

Byrdie, I could just picture you limping through the airport in taped together shoes. LOL. Thanks for a good laugh.

[peppersnow]

Byrdie, I can see the taped up shoes in my head - so sorry for you, but what a great story that made me laugh (and apparently a lot of others!) And how great is that to have a blast sober while everyone else is drinking? Good for you! Its kind of amazing how much our self-confidence increases, just in general, with knowing that we can be fun people sober and have fun when other people are drinking.

Kensho, hang in there and good for you for admitting you're struggling, which I think is exactly why you're going to get through this phase! I think if you get another few weeks in between you and that sip, you'll find your brain will do a re-set. But unfortunately, your experience is proof that our brains can go into obsession-mode again very easily. I'm glad you're posting about it.

MossRose, so sorry to hear about your family's health struggles. They are lucky to have you to lean on. Take care of yourself, too.

Goodnight, nesters.

[okoren1]

Great to see you and Jane again, Rahul!
I tell you, staying connected here is the KEY to this thing. This is a very isolating disease, even when we have good sober time under out belts if we dont stay with our support group, it can spell TROUBLE. Why? I think it's because once we get sober, we think...I want to get on with my life! I dont want to have to check in with these people all the time...I KNOW what to do and more importantly, what NOT to do. The trouble is, we are different. VERY different. 80% of the rest of the population drinks and we cant. Next thing you know, we get depressed.....here I am, making ALL THESE sacrifices and I STILL dont fit in. Do you see what is happeneing? The Perfect Storm of circumstances is being created to relapse. If you search 'relapse' you will find POST after POST that demonstares this. The bottom line is, we are very different and we have a disease that requires ongoing treatment. Its a lifelong party and we got an ivitation. The moral of the story is (just as Matt M. said) we cannot do this alone and we cannot maintain it alone. The world out there is just too geared towards AL. Do yourself a favor, when you feel alone and depressed get MORE engaged here. Go to chat and see if you can strike up a conversation, its fun! I promise you, you have friends here ....we care! So stay plugged in with your support and keep going, no matter what! If I can do it, I know you can!
Hugs to all, .Byrdie

Byrdie,

I like to page back and re-visit some of the particularly memorable posts (many are yours- you have a gifted way of saying things).

This one from a week or so ago, was notably cogent, especially in your words:

.I want to get on with my life! I dont want to have to check in with these people all the time...I KNOW what to do and more importantly, what NOT to do. The trouble is, we are different. VERY different

Great words to remember. Thanks!

PS- I loved your shoe story in the Charlotte airport- hilarious!