Newbies Nest

[Eloise]

Hi all,

Just checking in. Feeling a bit wobbly. Should be ok though. G

Hey G! Hang on today... maybe some L-Glut and a little nap in the afternoon? Taking a little nap seems to set things right for me, don't let yourself get too tired and run down. Maybe even just take the day off and loaf off?
Good to check in here regularly too. I am home today and will be lurking around if you want to chat later? :happy2:

[available]

Mr G you dont need to drink, it will solve nothing at all. Put those running shoes on and go for a coffee or something or to one of those nice cake shops close to you. Be strong, you have not long till the big triple digits.

[Eloise]

Hiya All. Getting some work done tonight and looking very forward to bed. Long week this one, but I'm glad to be sober. My new favorite thing is mindfulness - been reading about it and it is amazing.

Sleep tight!

Hey there! Glad you are doing well and working on keeping things in perspective, mindfulness HAS to help with that!

[Pinecone]

Hi Guitarista, hang in there buddy! I just read through everyone's posts for the last day or so and it it's so cool to hear everyone's"voice". I always appreciate yours. I think it's like hiking sometimes; there is a real steep part thrown in there to make the view more rewarding.

Kensho, I find mindfulness really helps me as well.

[Guitarista]

Thanks heaps everyone. All ok now.

Thanks for the chat offer Eloise. All of your comments and input is very much appreciated. Am working on some music at the mo and all's well. Thought i'd try the 'check in' strategy as suggested and it's helped. Thanks again and take care out there.

G.

[Mr. B]

Good morning. It's nice to go to work this early not being hung over from alcohol or drugs. Makes me feel good. My wife's happier these days with me. Not 100% yet. All have a good day.

[NoSugar]

Thought i'd try the 'check in' strategy as suggested and it's helped.

Glad to hear that the Real Mr. G. was able to outwit the addicted brain! It seems to me that for an online peer support forum to work, what you did is essential. It is great to read and gain ideas and inspiration but bottom line is to use it when you NEED HELP! And you did :smile:.

[Lavande]

Good morning Nesters & Happy Hump day

Looks like everyone had a safe night in the nest - just what I like to see.
Wishing everyone a wonderful AF day!

Lav

[Yogamom]

Good Morning All. Good for hold off Mr. G. I had a brief thought last night too, so I made a cup of hot cider. Did the trick. I think part of it is the ritual. I wish chocolate did it for me - I could care less for chocolate. DH is willing to wait on me when I request a non al drink so I need to take advantage of it. Let him do the dishes. Me go put feet up with cup of tea and help kids with homework. Me go take a hot bath. Replacing old habits with new habits.
Enjoyed a beautiful sunrise this am. Eloise - liked your analogy of hiking a mountain, Will keep that image. Kensho - did I mention I am reading a book on mindfulness. excellent stuff! Happy hump day all.

[Byrdlady]

Yeah, and sorry but I can't even give him the excuse that 'he doesn't know what he is doing.' He has been living so many years in a society where he feels he has no peers that he just doesn't ever consider anyone else's thoughts, input, conversation, feelings... etc. He just talks. When we speak on Skype it is him talking, when I try to add something he speak over me. Then I sit there quiet and after a long while he gets it that he has been annoying. But, who care?! Not him. And when I tell him I have to go, he will never just say okay, nice to talk to you. He has to say when the conversation is over. It is so embarrassing really and BAD manners.
My god sometimes I think what was the point of bringing up children with a proper education and manners when you (the father) is going to behave exactly the opposite?
My brother has little to nothing to do with him for years and I understand why. It has always been 'do as I say, not as I do.'
Shameful if you ask me and a real lack of character.

Opps. I guess I am still angry about all this, will work on it. My anger doesn't hurt anyone but me.
No one else cares if I am upset so what is the point? No point at all, gotta let it go out into the universe and burn up in space.
Ahh.... time for Pilates!

El,
I feel your pain on this one.
The situation I found myself in isn't like this per se, in my case it is spread out among my whole family! I always knew my family was 'quirky', but it wasn't until AFTER I stopped drinking that I stopped making excuses for them. After the fog lifted, I was able to see them thru a different set of optics. One was MEAN by nature. Similar to your dad, she had a mind set that could NOT be budged. An unwavering, hard driving woman (mother) whom I could never please. Nothing I did was EVER as good as _____. That blank would be filled in by whomever was not me. She was a bully and that is all there is to it. In retrospect, I believe it was really low self esteem...she was bullied by her dad, and I guess that's all she knew. My siblings are like the deadly sins, one is greedy, one is extremely jealous, and on and on it goes. Bottom line, it was a hard day when I realized my family were human (not the SuperHeros I made them out to be growing up). My mom and dad were flawed, as are all of their children. I accept it, but I do NOT have to be a victim to it anymore. NOTHING will change them, but I can change how they effect me. Let them live the lives THEY choose and I will live mine to my choosing. They are NOT my problem and I can't fix their screwed up lives. This came as a huge relief to me. Maybe I have finally grown up??

Anyway, just rambling....
I had a disturbing dream last night that I was drinking and had been lying about my quit all along! My customer (the one I loathe) was encouraging it and his employees were doing jumps over 5 lanes of interstate traffic (for sport)! What the WHAT? Glad to wake up from that one and realize my 1379 days are firmly in tact!

On to the workday! Hope everyone has an easy day today! Byrdie

[KENSHO]

Morning Peeps. Worked late last night. I've been getting so much good sleep that I've forgotten how yucky it feels to have less. To avoid AL danger zones, they say don't get Hungry, Angry, Lonely or Tired - and I think I spent a lot of time tired! Not worth it, though I really am in a bind with projects. I will get the boot if I don't catch up, so I may allow it just one more night. Then, time to take a real hard look at how not to get this overextend in the future.

Stay strong everyone.

Eloise, there is a father figure in my life who is a real gem as well. Absolutely selfish and a bit verbally abusive. It's such a struggle because you have to decide to either cut them out completely, or separate yourself from their crap to still have them in your life - cuz they just don't get it. It's frustrating and I recognize your pain! Just keep disconnecting from his stuff!

[Yogamom]

It is tough when the difficult person in your life is your family. Especially a parent. It is hard to cut them out, yet hard to deal with them. I have a SIL who is my achilles heel. I learned about narcissistic personality and it helped me deal/avoid her and her traps that used to suck me into her drama. You did a great job handling him Eloise. I dread holidays with extended family for this reason.

[narilly]

200 days for me today! Yay, I made it! This is the beginning of my sobriety journey. I want to live the rest of my life sober. Thank you everyone for helping me to get here.:heartbeat:

I posted this in the Gloamers thread:
Yesterday am I was getting ready for work (5:30am) and I heard my son come home. I thought, oh yeah, he was out with his friends or maybe at his girlfriends and is sneaking in before I come downstairs. After work he was home and he said "mom look". I looked at his face and he had a huge fat lip with a big cut right under his nose about 2" long with some scratches on his face. He had fallen down when he was drinking and hurt himself. Frick!!!! I freaked out a bit but did not talk too much about it. My husband talked to him last night and my son said he had to be more careful and he realized that was stupid. I am not sure if he really understands how risky it is to drink that much and be downtown in Calgary or anywhere for that matter. So I will talk to him about it in the next few days and try to be factual and not too emotional- that doesnt work.

I love my kid so much and I hate to see him go through anything close to what I did for the next 30 years before he figures it out but he has to have his own journey and I can only influence it so much.

Yoga mom, El, Kensho, I read your posts on difficult people in your family. They are a royal pain for sure and like, Yogamom says you can cut them out but you have to deal with them. I am lucky that the difficult people in my life are not so closely related but close enough to be a pain (in my butt).

Cowboy, glad you survived your drinking days
Anyway, back to work.

xo

[KENSHO]

You GO Narily!!!! 200 is inspirational! :welldone:

[frances]

Way to go Narilly!! Congratulations :-)