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    Hi All. I read all your posts, which are inspiring and comforting and painful all at the same time. I craved wine today. I was very tired, hungry and stressed. That seems to be the magic combination for me. The difference now is that I understand it, and that I know that AL is not a place I want to go, no matter how my brain craves it. But I think I'd better work on the eating and working late thing.

    Sorry about your dad Mr.B. jvo & SF, hanging tough with you. Byrdie, hope you are happily enjoying the (solid) meal of your choice. And Resolve, I admire you. It takes guts to fuck up and say it and leave a past behind that no longer works. Have faith that you are going in the right direction no matter how uncomfortable it is.

    That's it for tonight. Thank you to everyone here. It makes all the difference in the world that you understand.
    Kensho

    Done. Moving on to life.

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      Hi, Everyone:

      Great posts again. Byrdie - you speak the TRUTH so well.

      Resolve - you don't have to always stay positive here - sometimes this is hard shit and sometimes you just need a place to vent, and that's alright, too. Your post hit me hard as well - I love the way NS characterized it, so I'm not really going to add anything.

      Matt - you hit the nail on the head for me. Even now, 11 months in, I still occasionally feel ashamed and weak that I "let" let this happen to me. I am better about that each day, and more or less can accept that I didn't have control over becoming addicted. I have to take my own advice here - I definitely don't think any of you all or shameful or weak, so I have to afford myself that same grace. It is HARD for me to do. Thanks for your words.

      Mr. B - Best to your dad and your family. Sorry. Lean on us if you need us, or call someone local. Reaching out and asking for help during difficult times is key to staying sober.

      J-Vo - yes turn away from alcohol, and turn TOWARD a better life. So much better than working out how to constantly battle.

      Daisy - Sorry about your vermin. At least you have something to focus on...

      Lav - I'm watching results, too. Yes, I voted!

      Byrdie - Your predicament is truly moving. I hope everything comes out ok in the end.

      xo
      Pav

      Comment


        Kensho~ Glad you didn't drink the wine. I look forward to being able to deal with daily stress and or issues without the thought of drink. A lot of Muscle memory, turning to that quick fix.
        I'm learning in these rooms from the long time sober folks, is that it does get better with diligence and time. Something we can look forward to.
        Keep on keeping on sweet lady.

        Mr B~ well wishes sent your way

        Thanks everyone for being here and sharing!
        AF 08~05~2014


        There is a 100% chance I can't do this by myself! ~ Me

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          hello! i am new here!
          “There was a moment in my life when I really wanted to kill myself. And there was one other moment when I was close to that. . . . But even in my most jaded times, I had some hope.”

          Comment


            Originally posted by ShawTHo View Post
            hello! i am new here!
            Hello Shawtho,

            Welcome! How are you doing friend? G

            'I am part of all that I have met, yet all experience is an arch wherethro', gleams that untravelled world whose margins fade, forever and forever when I move'

            Zen soul Warrior. Freedom today-

            Comment


              hi!

              thanks for the welcome!

              i'm good.

              just joined. i feel like i can relate on some buddies here whose dealing addiction same as mine.

              thanks again!
              “There was a moment in my life when I really wanted to kill myself. And there was one other moment when I was close to that. . . . But even in my most jaded times, I had some hope.”

              Comment


                Originally posted by ShawTHo View Post
                hi!

                thanks for the welcome!

                i'm good.

                just joined. i feel like i can relate on some buddies here whose dealing addiction same as mine.

                thanks again!
                Glad to hear. Yes, i think you will find many kindred spirits here.

                This thread is a great place to begin. All the best. G

                'I am part of all that I have met, yet all experience is an arch wherethro', gleams that untravelled world whose margins fade, forever and forever when I move'

                Zen soul Warrior. Freedom today-

                Comment


                  Originally posted by Guitarista View Post
                  Glad to hear. Yes, i think you will find many kindred spirits here.

                  This thread is a great place to begin. All the best. G
                  yeah, i can feel that already. i looked around and found out that everyone seems nice hope this will be my permanent forum site. i've been through many sites, and not all of them seems ok. for the record, i feel that i'm belong here for some reason
                  “There was a moment in my life when I really wanted to kill myself. And there was one other moment when I was close to that. . . . But even in my most jaded times, I had some hope.”

                  Comment


                    There sure have been some moving, and thoughtful posts in the nest lately. Keeps me on my toes.

                    Mr. B - sorry to hear about your dad. Saying prayers.

                    Kensho - As alluring as that glass of of wine sounds (my poison of choice too), it's all a damn lie as you already know. Just a fast track to hell. Glad you stayed strong.

                    Resolve - So glad you came back and let us know how you are doing. You've gotten excellent feedback and advice, so all I can add is we're standing with you. And I agree, you have already helped many just by telling your story. Focus on your own healing right now. There will be plenty of time to give back down the road.

                    ShawTHo - Welcome. Yes, the people here are very nice. I have had some awful experiences online, and was reluctant to try again, but this was a great fit for me, and I'm sure it will be for you too. Looking forward to getting to know you better.

                    Hi G!! Hope all is well in your world.

                    Byrdie - Happy the test is behind you, and there's real food on the menu again.

                    Well, I woke up this morning and realized I was out of coffee. That is a major catastrophe for me. I actually started to panic. But then I remembered that a GF brought me a large assortment of gourmet teas not long ago. I have to say, this could become a new morning ritual. Lovely.
                    Everything is going to be amazing

                    Comment


                      Morning, Nesters!
                      Yes, it is great sport being the BUTT of all these colon jokes! It all DID come out in the end...it really IS a pain in the ass, but the worst isn't behind me yet! The procedure is at 11:30!
                      I am trying to stay optimistic and say that doing this once a year is a lot better than the alternative of colon cancer, so I will cling to that little morsel. (that will be the only morsel that is clinging, everything else is GONE).
                      If I never have Jello again, that'll be ok by me.

                      Daisy, I am so sorry to hear about your mice, I hope you can get to the bottom of it. (another colon joke, sorry) They are scary and a LOT of work! Good luck on that. I will see you over on roll call shortly.

                      Mr. B, my thoughts and prayers will be for your Pops. That is a tough piece of business. I'm so sorry to hear this....strength and peace to you.

                      It really worries me to see these states legalizing marijuana. I wonder why AL is legal, look at all the destruction is causes! I haven't seen any compelling evidence that legalizing it does a dam thing....easier access to getting high, that's just what we (as a society) need!!! More people driving high....this is just nuts!

                      Welcome ShawTHo! You've come to the right place if you are ready to kick AL out of your life and start living!!!

                      That's about all I have....will check in when I can! Hugs to all! Byrdie
                      All you gotta do, is get thru this day. AF 1/20/2011
                      Tool Box
                      Newbie's Nest

                      Comment


                        Byrdie - guess I need to get some reading glasses. LOL. Good luck today. xx
                        Everything is going to be amazing

                        Comment


                          Hi friends,
                          Byrdie, I nominate your"alcohol is the problem" for post of the year. Please put that one I the toolbox. I hope you get back to normal soon!
                          Mr. B, thinking of your father and family.
                          Resolve, thanks for your posts. I'll echo the others who said that you already have begun helping.

                          Folks let's take a look at the long view today. Where are we at right now and how does that look carried forward into the immediate, medium and long term. This doesn't have to feel like work though! Having an awesome, fulfilling AF life is joyous and rewarding. I think it also helps to secure our sobriety. I was afraid for a long time just after quitting to make a lot of life changes. I think I felt like I didn't deserve to focus on me after being a selfish alcoholic for years. I was also afraid that I would screw it up again. I now think that we need to put our chips on the table. So, in the long view, I ask myself "what are the changes I want to see in myself or my life". I don't mean overnight things. I'm talking about steering an oil tanker types of things; you turn the wheel and it goes very slowly the direction you want. Incremental change. We will get right where we are headed eventually!
                          "When you have faults, do not fear to abandon them." Analects of Confucius
                          AF 11/12/11

                          Comment


                            GMAE everyone- Welcome Shaw- this is a great place to help in your struggle, so settle into the nest. Kensho - way to say "no" to wine again..it is neither food or a good stress reliever.
                            Hope everyone else is staying strong and AF out there..

                            100 glorious days,
                            without any booze
                            I don't do what I feel,
                            I do what I choose.

                            I'm in control now,
                            not you controlling me.
                            I'm winning this battle,
                            just wait and see.

                            Go away alcohol,
                            you're not wanted around
                            just leave now,
                            don't make a sound.

                            We don't want you back,
                            let's make that clear..
                            so don't ask again,
                            and don't come around here.

                            MWO is stronger than you
                            and we've faced you before
                            and this time we're a team
                            so we'll see you no more
                            Last edited by See the Light; November 5, 2014, 08:40 AM.
                            “Hope is being able to see that there is light despite all of the darkness”- Desmond Tutu


                            STL

                            Comment


                              Thank you STL and Pinecone for the uplifting and positive words! This business is really hard, bit it has an amazing upside too... We CAN have the life we want WITHOUT AL. Thanks!

                              Welcome ShawTHo!!
                              Kensho

                              Done. Moving on to life.

                              Comment


                                Good morning Nesters,

                                Almost noon already!
                                Had my root canal done this moring & it was painless. It really helps when they get the novocaine in just the right spot

                                Thinking about you Brydie, I know you are have your procedure right about now.

                                Hello & welcome ShawTHo! Glad you decided to join us - we are a nice bunch

                                Mr B, thinking about your, your Dad & hoping everything turns out OK.

                                STL, is that you announcing 100 days AF> CONGRATS!!!

                                Greetings to everyone & sending wishes for a wonderful rest iof hump day!

                                Lav
                                AF since 03/26/09
                                NF since 05/19/09
                                Success comes one day at a time :thumbs:

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