Newbies Nest

[Pavati]

xpost Nar. Good night.

Kensho - go back and read old posts of yours. That helps me always. Stay strong!

[Pavati]

And x post G. 'Night.

[Guitarista]

G'night Pavi!

[available]

Since I've already admitted that I'm lonely to the entire MWO world, it's no surprise that I am posting again. Tonight sucks. It just does. I so badly want to get to the point where I am a pillar of strength - someone that newbies can look up to - the one who has made it to the other side gracefully - but I'm just not there yet. I don't want to drink., and I wont. And I haven't for a long time. But, I just want to get to the point where the thought never crosses my mind again. When will that day come? I'm tired and stressed tonight, so this post is probably something I will regret later. But I am struggling. Not with AL so much, just with life. How to do life straight up which is something I'm not all that skilled at. Everything is so awful right now. The people I love are very sick. My parents are so sad. My nephew is pissing me off. It's just life. I get it. But really, wth? I should probably sign off now, and climb into my cocoon, but I'm not sure that's healthy either. It's just been a rough day. Thanks for listening everyone. I'm just venting. Tomorrow will be so much better.

Moss i am with you so i am giving you a big hug. its hard being strong for everyone and i have also felt like you do but the best thing we can do is stay sober. Remember we are growing emotionally without al as our crutch and some days it is hard. Robert was told he has cancer in his liver yesterday, he was devastated and so was i. i came home and sobbed, i had to let it out, i could not cope anymore with the sadness. I never cry, i am the strong one but i realise that i also have to look after me to be there for him. You as i have said numerous times MR are an inspiration to me. you give me encouragement and strength to keep on going each day. If you can deal with the crap then i certainly can too. We will get through this sober, we have to. We are strong people and especially so without al.

[MossRose]

oh Ava - I am so sorry to hear about Robert. He has been through so much. So have you. Huge hugs winging their way to you. xx

Thanks everyone for the kind words. I cringed when I re-read my whiny posts from last night. But it's either come here and vent, or gamble that I am strong enough. I've never been a betting girl, so I'll deal with the slight embarrassment. At least it's better than a hangover and loads of shame.

Stay strong everyone. I am so thankful for all of you.

[Lavande]

Good morning Nesters, happy Thursday to all

Ava, very sorry to hear about Robert's diagnosis. Have they developed a care plan yet? I hope he is as comfortable as possible & you take good care of yourself. Sometimes these things are just out of our hands :hug:

MossRose, no need to feel embarrassed for doing the right thing. We are all friends here, right? Keeping in touch with your feelings & sharing them with us is the best thing to do

Wishing everyone a great AF Thursday! I'm meeting some friends for lunch today so I am happy!

Lav

[embrace]

goodmorning!

I am a daily drinker….that is, at least a bottle of wine a night…more like 1.5…OR I switch to vodka on my light nights…..I have maybe 3 or 4 vodka shots in seltzer. Typical story….work full time, married, two teenaged sons, one son is in trouble with his pot use….feel guilty - it is my fault he is this way…stress, pressure, taking care of my 80 year old mom who lives next door, depression, anxiety…….you know the story well.

so, i went to a psychiatrist yesterday. Told him how last year I went 4 months without drinking but that I just can't do it alone. thought he would be prescribing me with medications to help me quit. He said, "no, that would be a waste of time. First you need to stop drinking and you need professional help so what you need to do is go to a 3 day detox and then outpatient therapy" Has anyone experienced this? what is it like? My reaction surprised me…..it was one of relief. so, today, I am going to call the place he recommended and set a date to go….but would be interested in opinions here….

[Fin]

To Moss: "Tomorrow is a new day" That's what we say around my house when the shit hits the fan and as Byrd says, two bad days in a row rarely happen. Hang in there...and all the best to you.

[Fin]

Fin - there is a whole thread dedicated to declinol in the holistic section. I haven't really read through it, but hope this helps: https://www.mywayout.org/community/sh...light=declinol

Wow. Thank you!! I'm going to take Okoren's advice and hit Vit Cottage up for some L-Glut.

[Byrdlady]

Good Morning, Nesters!
Welcome Embrace!
My opinion about the 3 day detox....Do whatever you have to do to get sober. I think a medically supervised program would be very helpful. There are some others who can weigh in on this subject. I did not have that, but I imagine it would have been extremely helpful. Anything that will get you on track is a good plan. You will not believe how much BETTER you will feel 3 days from now! You have wonderful support right here for your go-forward plan afterwards. Please keep us posted. We are so glad you found us.

OkOren, if you'll do a search on Kindling on this site, you will find your answer as to why quitting keeps getting more difficult after repeated stops and starts. However, I am of the mind that it is the whole positive reinforcement idea. Remember Pavlov's dog? When we are trying to quit and the cravings get so strong we just CAN'T over come them and give in? THAT is positive reinforcement and I believe that makes our cravings STRONGER and more potent, they HAVE to be so we will eventually yield. Like a spoiled child (or dog, in my case)....the tantrums become WORSE because they have to be, in order to get the intended outcome. That's just my 2 cents. I am a huge believer in POSITIVE reinforcement (this is probably why I am The Prize Patrol) I think there isn't much more powerful tool than that. I'm not a doctor (I just play one on tv) there probably IS a lot of science involved here, too, but I think a great deal of it is BEHAVIORAL as well.

Hope everyone has a wonderful Thursday!!!! Byrdie

[narilly]

Embrace, wow! You sound just like me- last year. I drank about the same, my son was doing pot and I have an 80 year old mom who I have to help (a lot). There are periods where she needs a TON of care and that all falls on me.

Do whatever it takes to get sober. It can never be a bad thing. I have to go, but will check back. Embrace, I am so glad you posted. Please come back.
xo

[Fin]

Like a spoiled child (or dog, in my case)....the tantrums become WORSE because they have to be, in order to get the intended outcome. That's just my 2 cents. I am a huge believer in POSITIVE reinforcement (this is probably why I am The Prize Patrol)
Byrdie

I love this. They do yell louder, don't they and caving just reinforces the behavior. So true!

[NoSugar]

I love this. They do yell louder, don't they and caving just reinforces the behavior. So true!

I think that is one of the problema with repeated day ones, too. They reinforce one another and can even get you to the point where you expect to fail. Talk about a motivation killer!

That's why I'm a big believer in changing a variable each time you try and really committing to using whatever your new tool is - believe that it is the one that will make all the difference for you. One of them will.

[narilly]

Awesome! That is the best analogy. Feed the beast and he just gets stronger. We have to starve him so he goes away.

Gotta love the Prize Patrol. I can't wait for my next visit :welldone:

[NoSugar]

El, Congratulations on achieving 200 AF days! I had just written to an MWO friend today that I was really discouraged that people weren't more open to the idea of helping ourselves get over an addiction by re-nourishing our bodies and by eliminating those foods that keep poking our limbic brain and keeping its toxic dream alive. Your response in the Roll Call thread really perked me up :smile::

I think each day becomes a little more natural not drinking. And, I must say eliminating processed foods & sugar has helped enormously.