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    thank you. I need some right now.

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      AG - take a deep breath. Now, another one. OK - this situation is upsetting, but not insurmountable. We've all been there. You are in a very safe place. and we all truly understand. Can you tell us a bit more? How much/long have you been a drinker? Is this something out of the ordinary? What are doing right now?
      Everything is going to be amazing

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        [QUOTE=Byrdlady;1581449]

        Which reminds me that OkOren has 4 months today!!! WOOOHOOOO!
        :flip:
        That is flipping amazing!!!! GREAT JOB!
        How's it going for you at this point?

        Byrdie,

        As I mentioned on the Roll Call,

        Thanks for your kind words!!! Your constant daily presence and wonderful encouragement are vitally important to me and all of us who are working through our struggles here.

        In fact, (as you and I have PM'd back and forth), I can't imagine the number of souls you have literally saved from this madness through the years because of your heart-warming comments and untiring support.

        I remain confident there is certainly a special place in heaven for you!!!

        Thank you,

        Mike

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          30 years. What is out of the ordinary is for the last 6-12 months it has escalated a great deal as far as BOs, etc. I don't seem to have an off button anymore, whereas I used to.

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            Welcome Action to the nest. As Pine said this is our safe place, we all can relate to how you feel and how are actions are when drinking.

            Maybe this is your bottom and now is the time to stop drinking. i could write a book on the dumb things i did and said and acted but being sober is the best. i cant take back the past but i knew i could have a future if i stopped drinking. I am living the dream now.

            if not for this site and the support of my 4 children i would not be where i am today. Take this one day at a time Action, be gentle on yourself, get rid of all al out of the house, post on here like a lunatic (apparently i was a big lunatic in the early days) and make a plan, it only has to be small. Eat when you are hungry, sleep when you are tired and dont drink. The days will get better and better being af.

            We are all a wonderful bunch of people on here and we all have been in the hole you are in, we just have a different story with the same ending.

            Take care
            AF free 1st December 2013 - 1st December 2022 - 9 years of freedom

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              AG - If you are drinking, please stop and pour the rest of it down the drain. I get it - you feel terrible, and the shame is too much to bear, so a drink sounds like a good idea. AL lies. Listen to us instead. So will you do that for me? Just don't drink tonight. I promise, I'll stay with you and we'll work this out together. I got to the point where blackouts were my nightly ritual. It creeps up slowly. I understand. I know right now you think your son is scarred for life, and will never forgive you. That is not true. I am living proof. One day, I'll tell you my story, but tonight let's just focus on getting you to a safe place. xx
              Everything is going to be amazing

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                I am not drinking. More worried about tomorrow and the next day about that. Thank you. I'm going to watch a feel good movie and go to bed early.

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                  Good for you. I know it sounds like I'm being a Pollyanna, but I'm am telling you the truth, it will get better. Everything can be repaired. But first you have to take care of yourself. Please get a good night's sleep, eat well, and come back tomorrow and let us know how you are doing. We'll stand with you. You don't have to do this alone. xx
                  Everything is going to be amazing

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                    Actiongirl, welcome to your way out! Only 6 days ago I did not know if I would make it through another night....scared, ashamed, physical symptoms of numbing, tingling, itching, panicking, bloated skin, sweating. That was only 6 days ago.......today I see everything so differently......you will too! You just have to really push through those first couple of days no matter what....
                    Then, when clarity comes back and you see your interaction with your son and hubby working in a nice way, you may just decide that this sober shit is worth giving a go! You have rhe chance to create so many good memories in the future that that one night will pale away......
                    I know where you are right now....we all do...
                    IT'S NEVER TOO LATE TO BE WHAT YOU MIGHT HAVE BEEN
                    Relapse starts long before the drink is drunk!!.Fresh Start!

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                      sound like a good plan!

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                        Atta girl! You won't even have to do day 1 as you're there already.....my day 1 came through fear and when I landed on day 2, thought this is a good time to get going.....rest now and check in tomorrow to arm yourself with information from the wise old owls that have paved the way for us!
                        IT'S NEVER TOO LATE TO BE WHAT YOU MIGHT HAVE BEEN
                        Relapse starts long before the drink is drunk!!.Fresh Start!

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                          Good evening Nesters,

                          Busy day here - that's great to see

                          Congrats on your 4 AF months OkO! Life keeps getting better & better!!

                          Hello & welcome Actiongirl, glad you found us & decided to join the group.
                          Sometimes we have to scare ourselves into action, otherwise we would just keep putting off giving AL the boot!
                          Glad you are OK, make a plan for yourself & stay close to the nest. You have lots of understanding company here!

                          Greetings to everyone & wishing a safe night in the nest for all!

                          Lav
                          AF since 03/26/09
                          NF since 05/19/09
                          Success comes one day at a time :thumbs:

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                            Hi, Nest:

                            WHOOT to Okoren! Four months is awesome. I remember feeling pretty flat about that time. Focus on one day at a time, and keep posting here. The post pink cloud doldrums clear up, and life, she is good. And I agree about Byrdie. She's pretty amazing.

                            ActionGirl - Welcome! I'm sorry about your night last night. I had a pretty awesomely bad last night drinking (not last night, but a year ago). One piece of advice I got here was to write about it in excruciating detail (I did :egad, and then when you're starting to feel better (note the days 3-7 mentioned above), read and remember how you never want to feel like this again. The good news is, you don't have to! My 12-yo just told me he wants to use me as a role model for not drinking in his life. Hah - we'll see about that, but at least I don't represent something he DOESN'T want to be.

                            I am off to the first holiday party of the season. It is centered around a special mulled wine that this family makes - and they make a children's version with no alcohol, too. I have a bit of a bad attitude about it - I love the people who will be there, so I am hoping that I'll be ok when I get there. If not, I am taking a car so I have an exit strategy (I won't be posting from a bathroom again!). And I have something on the Netflix cue for when I get back. Now THAT'S a Saturday night plan.

                            Use as much butt velcro as necessary.

                            Pav

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                              PS - Way to go Fin, Daisy and Sho. Keep it up.

                              Ican - if you're reading, we're here for you.

                              Pav

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                                Byrdie, I loved your post about the addicts voice. I hear that voice sometimes and it is very strong. I know as time goes on it will get less and less.

                                Okoren,, way to go on the four months! Yay!

                                Action, I am sorry you are going throught this but now is the time to take charge. You can do it. Don't drink today, throw all your booze out. Listen to podcasts, the Bubblehour.com is a bunch of podcasts done by a group of women like us who struggle with AL. They have jobs, husbands, kids and big problems with alcohol. These podcasts really helped me .
                                I have been drinking since I was 12 and now I am 50 and determined not to have any more blackouts or hangovers. The only way to prevent them is by not drinking AL at all.

                                You have come to a good place. Welcome.
                                Narilly

                                "Nothing in this World Can take the place of Persistence"
                                "You can have the life you want OR you can Drink"

                                AF April 12, 2014

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