Newbies Nest

[available]

Congratulations sho on 7 days. I was ecstatic when i finally did 7 days and they were certainly not days i wanted to repeat.

[Resolve]

Thanks Matt, Ava, Pav and everyone for your comments yesterday. This was one of those moments where I knew the answer but needed to hear it. And I knew that by posting here, and keeping my accountability bar high by doing so, that you'd set me straight. I think I'll go with one of the modified honesty approach examples rather than full-on admission of being an alcoholic, at least initially. But to set that record straight, I am one and also am not ashamed of that. Plenty of other reasons I do feel shame, but this affliction is part of me, warts and all. I'm doing the hard work here day to day and dealing with it as are all of you. And there's no way I'm going to let another relapse come at me when the moon and stars seem to be aligning that way. More and more I see that a sneak attack is far less likely when we're really committed, and if we are, we can head off any ambush by posting here and taking the temperature in the room.

Kensho - liking the check the box story. I have a friend that's also a fellow hockey dad and a dentist. Unfortunately he knows all about my issue now with our sons as teammates, BUT before that unfortunate night, I had previously given him grief for being a tobacco chewer. A dentist no less! I told him he can never give his patients too much grief about their teeth given his example...of course now as he discreetly spits away in his cup I have nothing to say about that anymore. We've all got our issues.

Sho :thumbsup:

[Rahulthesweet]

Hello Nesters,

Some of the religions preach that one can attain enlightenment if they learn to shed all world pleasures. The desires of money, fame, sex are all that you leave here when you die. Some even believe that the soul goes they a cycle of birth and death and again till it gets enlightened to break this cycle of life and death etc by coming of desires. When the soul does not series of accumulation of wealth, fame etc etc, then it is truly in touch with GOD. That can happen if one practice to live in present moment. When our conscious is in present moment one it thinking only about the present moment and not about worries of past or desires of future. It's at peace and its a true route to enlightenment.

Interesting theory which forms basis of Buddhism and yoga. But if I compare this with the cycle of drinking and drug addiction I guess there are quite similarities. There is a cycle when needs to be broken. Once broken one feels so free and enlightened. It's like an awakening a fresh prospective. So in a way am I enlightened with a touch of sobriety ?

I don't intent to philosophise but just thought about all this when I was with a young crowd today ... In mid twenties who were drinking very much casually and enjoying drink seeing them I saw myself as I was 10 years ago ? They are in beginning of carrier and also drinking, I am a matured on both these fronts. But they too with go thru the same cycle. They will work hard in professional front and maybe become alcolic like me. But surely their drinking will progress.

Seeing them from I felt not only older but in a enlightened as to I know what drinking can lead to and how thier life too will progress ...

I do feel enlightened in a way as atleast enlightened about what AL can do. But my my how Al blinds someone ...

Just thought of sharing ...

[Matt M.]

NOT AL Related~
Sorry for the clutter.
I have often talked about my job although I absolutely love my profession, at times it can be tough.
I know there are others here in the medical/public safety field. Others that have spouses and children in the profession that live it as well.
This is the profession I chose so my intent here is not to come across as someone looking for applause or an accolade.
A question we get asked a lot and although harmless and inquisitive, I hate it.

"WHAT IS THE WORST THING YOU EVER SAW?"

I thought this was a great read.

https://alphaechoflight.wordpress.com/2014/12/09/the-worst-thing-i-have-ever-seen/

[Byrdlady]

Wow, Matt, what a powerful article. I don't know how you do it! But I'm so glad you do!

It makes the meeting I had today seem like small potatoes! (Bah, it was a grocery store chain). I was there and two guys from a vendor we use. All three of us pounding on the head of this guy and he just was NOT interested! Of all the nerve! We crashed and burned....oh well, I learned a lot preparing for the darn thing. It is inconceivable to me that a grocery store would not have cameras in it! I tried to talk about 'The Customer Experience' and feeling safe and secure when you are shopping there, he said 'Our customers ARE safe and secure'. Is it just me or do I not read about armed robberies every day in the paper. If a store has NO security, how can it be safe? Nothing to deter a robbery at all! Oh well, I'm nothing if not persistent.

I never thought I would be able to survive a night in a hotel room without AL. Of all the 'what it's' I had in my mind, this was the one that scared me the most. I'd have opportunity, low risk, and TIME. If I can get thru an evening now without even thinking about it, I know you can! It just takes repetition and practice! Getting sober is a skill that is learned!

Hope everyone had a great day! Big numbers being posted over on roll call! It's a wonderful sight to behold!! Hugs all, Byrdie

[available]

I found this on another website which i thought was very true.

“Never, never, never give up.”
by Winston Churchill
҉
#1 “I have a life-threatening problem that once had me.”
I now take charge of my life and my disease. I accept the responsibility.

I clenched my teeth, I wrung my hands, I tensed up my body.
I am sober.

I kept my hands busy. I read and read and read and read some more. I went to the MWO forum website.
I am sober.

I walked on the treadmill, I sat in silence, I visited new friends.
I am sober.

I went to meetings. I went to conference. I took notes.
I am sober.

I questioned. I agreed. I responded. I ignored.
I am sober.

I wrote. I meditated. I participated.
I am sober.

I listened. I shared. I laughed. I cried.
I am sober.

I released. I embraced. I gave. I received.
I am sober.

I created. I destroyed. I learned. I unlearned.
I am sober.

I experienced. I succeeded. I failed.
I am sober.

I forgave. I maintained. I clarified.
I am sober.

I chose. I encouraged. I prevented.
I am sober.

I tried. I changed. I loved.
I am sober.

To try is my best option.

[daisy45]

Another day of great posts.....my end of day dose to carry me through the next...
Very tired tonight...again! Living on 4 to 5 hours sleep. Tomorrow I get a lie-in. Only 1 toddler in the morning and my daughter is taking her out to another childs school play. Next kids don't come until noon and after.
Today we had 5 under 5s and two 7 yr olds...all girls.....they kept me going! Earned my money today!
Day 11 for me.....still feeling relieved and happy....I think I my have got off the merry-go-round just in time. I have had the odd thought but never strong enough to take me back.....I can feel the pain still of how things were over this past 3 months.....I never want to feel that way again!

[frances]

Just got home from holiday party #2 this evening without drinking! #3 is Saturday and I am getting my plan in place.

I need to be ready for the unexpected because that is what got me before. If someone hands me a drink I will say "Thanks, but I don't drink".

Wishing everyone a good and AF Friday and weekend!

[open halo]

Hope everyone is doing well, I'm not sure why, but I'm not even feeling anxious going into the holidays AF, I think there comes a point when you just need to say ,"I deserve better." And a life without AL is definitely better for me... Wishing everyone an awesome start to the holidays!

[open halo]

Just got home from holiday party #2 this evening without drinking! #3 is Saturday and I am getting my plan in place.

I need to be ready for the unexpected because that is what got me before. If someone hands me a drink I will say "Thanks, but I don't drink".



Wishing everyone a good and AF Friday and weekend!

Awesome Frances and a good reminder that we all need a plan to help us succeed!

[Turnagain]

Hi Frances and Open Halo - it's great to see both of you back....that goes for everyone else who has recently returned or is brand new to the Nest! It takes real courage to seek out the knowledge and support to boot addiction out of our lives for good.

I just want to say BRAVO to Frances for tackling those holiday parties without drinking. EVERY time you replace the old behavior with a strong stand against drinking, you are actually repairing your biochemstry and brain pathways. EVERY time! And it adds up. Before you know it, you're knocking out the cravings like a ninja.

That's VERY smart to have a plan in place! That sure helped me in the initial stages of my final and forever quit.

Keep it up....you're helping yourself and others in a powerful way. I think everyone who is stepping up to quit AL during the holidays deserves BONUS KUDOS!!!!:sohappy::thumbsup::sohappy:

[Suek]

That's VERY smart to have a plan in place! That sure helped me in the initial stages of my final and forever quit.

Keep it up....you're helping yourself and others in a powerful way. I think everyone who is stepping up to quit AL during the holidays deserves BONUS KUDOS!!!!:sohappy::thumbsup::sohappy:

I have been bringing non alcoholics beverages to parties. At least a 12 pack of club soda and a few bottles of sparkling cider or whatever. Same as I used to bring beer or wine.

Found bottles of sparkling cranberry juice on seasonal sale, and mixed 1/3 with 2/3 lime flavored club soda is the PERFECT party drink, not too sweet and bubbly! Who needs AL??? :happy2:
The funny thing is the Non-AL drinks have been more popular than the AL drinks, so I make sure to bring plenty!
The younger crowd (in their 20's) seem to be shying away from AL! Very different from last year....

[Pinecone]

Resolve, I'm glad about your decision. The sooner you address or the better so it won't gain any momentum. Like Pav, I've been finding it a very positive thing to tell others that I don't drink. I don't usually use the word alcoholic, although I am. I usually tell people it was way past time to grow up and focus on the positive things in life. I've never had a negative response. When others are talking about drinking and try to get me involved in the conversation, I remind them that I gave it up. I think staying true to our commitment in both action and in word is important.

Daisy, you sound great! Kids bring a whole other brand of tied into our life, don't they? It's fun though.

Seer you all in the morning. Have a great AF night!

[daisy45]

Yea Pinecone, and all their wee personalities shining through from an early age. I have 2 sisters who are budding artists and love the fact that I paint and draw. Another, the 2 yr old is afraid of men! Not her dad, but most others. My brother-in-law is working at my patio this week and we have to remove her from the room when he comes in. She is overcome with fear.....she is a happy, cheeky wee tot. Her mum and I figure it must be something from a past life.
2 others, sisters aged 3 and 4, speak with the highest pitched voices and demand from they come in until home time. They fight all day long.
I have a 4 yr old who has taken to spying through the keyhole when someone uses the bathroom.......covered that one up. Today we lost the bathroom door key.....in her pocket!
I have yet again become a baby bore....we talk about them when they are here and long after they go home.

[MossRose]

Hi everyone. Just checking in. I had a lovely dinner tonight with a friend I don't get to see very often. It was nice. She has never been a drinker, so it never seems odd to her that I am not drinking. It's just normal for her. Sad that I used to find dinners with her an endurance test, since I had to count my drinks. Isn't that the saddest thing to admit? So glad those days are over, because we had a good time tonight.

Sho - way to go on 7 days! You're on your way now.

Pine - I'm with you. I am an alcoholic, but I rarely use that word either. I just prefer to say I don't drink. Or if pushed, I say that I used to drink, but I don't anymore. I guess I'm one of the lucky ones, because my friends were so concerned about my drinking back in the day, that they are relieved I quit. And the ones who find it aberrant - well, I don't see much of them anymore.

My brother is still in ICU but hanging in there. He is having a lot of anxiety because he can't communicate. He knew, intellectually, going into it that he would lose his ability to speak forever, but it's a hard thing to grasp emotionally. He keeps trying to talk. It is really heartbreaking. One thing I did want to pass along, just in case anyone is fighting a craving and looking for one more reason to hang on. His surgeon did say that his year's of drinking most certainly contributed to him developing this type of cancer, and that it may have been avoidable. Dying for a drink. How sad.