Newbies Nest

[Byrdlady]

Morning, Nesters!
Great to see everyone!
Rahul! Great quote! "You may have kicked the beast out of your apartment but he is in the parking lot doing push ups!!!" That is a keeper! I am glad you had some good family time! Did you try the malted milk shakes at Johnny Rockets? MMMmmmm. Id hate to get you hooked on something else, but they are mighty good.

Soft Focus, thank you for your honest answer. Here's the thing....do you really want to get to that FINAL STEP? To use Ava's gentle words, It's a real ball buster! In the Tool Box is a listing of the stages of Alcoholism, there are 4 of them. (I have that post in my personal Tool Box if you cant find it). I would give ANYTHING if I could have a do-over on my life. If I had only quit when I was at stage 1 or 2....but like the soldier I am, I marched on! This disease is progressive, I know you know that, but your relationship with AL today is as good as it's ever going to get. I say AS GOOD....because it will get worse over time. This jeannie does not go back into the bottle. That is the real beauty of this site....with it you are able to see the past, present, and future. There are thousands of members who, over time, have wrestled with the same questions you do. What I have discovered in my time here are that there are basically 3 groups of folks here. (This is a wild generalization). Group 1. Folks who never gain control over AL and eventually die from it. Group 2. Those who fight getting sober tooth and nail. They have some stretches, but chronically relapse. This will be the pattern they will repeat for the duration. This is the largest group by far. They are constantly in a struggle with AL. Group 3. The folks who completely abstain because they understand the control AL has in their lives and are no longer willing to suffer the consequences. No struggles with AL, because they have banned it from their lives. As you look around this site, there is 7 years of history to review, and from what I have observed is this: People on this site have a problem with AL, and unless and until they remove it, they always will. That pretty much sums it up. I wish I hadn't taken the scenic route to get where I am....for every long term person here you will hear the same message..I WISH I HAD DONE IT SOONER. My date below would be a whole year longer if I had, and I wouldn't have wasted another precious year. I barely remember my 40's! That is sad. So which group do you want to be in, because the choice IS yours to make. We are here to help you any way we can....but we cannot make you become a responsible drinker. That ship has sailed for all of us. But, there is great news! Getting AL out of your life will be the best decision you will ever make! We are ALL HAPPY about it! It isn't a death sentence it is a LIFE sentence!!!

Hope everyone has a peaceful, productive day!! Byrdie

[Pavati]

Good morning, everyone:

Soft Focus - that was brave to admit here, and I thank you for your questions. What I have heard said is that alcoholism is defined by what the drinker thinks about her relationship with alcohol. Of course, if you're messing up other people's lives with your drinking, then it becomes obvious. The Bubble Hour podcast on the topic is very good. Here is the link to the podcast, or you can download it directly from iTunes. I like their intro:

Am I an alcoholic? Or not? This is one of the most frequent questions we're asked from people who are wondering about their drinking. The only person who can answer this question, though, is the person asking it.

Alcoholism is a disease that relies on the patient to diagnose his/herself. Even though our factual experiences/stories are different, we find out in recovery that we share some common experiences and emotions (commonly known as "signposts") as we progress down the road of addiction. The hardest signs to recognize are the sneaky, subtle ones that happen earlier on in the 'drinking arc'. As the disease progresses, the signs become more obvious, but many of us normalize it somehow, or are simply in straight out denial that our drinking is becoming a problem.

This show features special guest Michele, who shares some of her own signposts, and Lisa and Ellie contribute some of theirs as well.

There is no one way to define "alcoholic". In fact, that label keeps many people stuck and alone. In this show we focus on the common feelings and experiences - things we wish we'd known along our own path were warning signs.

It's not how much or how often you drink, it's what it does to you that matters.

That's what this episode is all about; our similarities, and the fact that you're NOT alone.


Happy Sober Sunday, everyone. I LOVE my non-hungover Sunday morning coffee.

Pav

[KENSHO]

Hi All. Guitarista posted this back in March and it was so helpful to me I thought I'd repost.

Guitarista posted on 3/21/14:

101 Things to Keep You Clean & Sober
Use a few of these great tips in helping yourself --------------------------------------------------------------------------------

1. Don’t underestimate your disease. Every single person does at first.

2. Take care of yourself spiritually. Be mindful of your connection to your higher power today.

3. Ignore the dismal relapse rates. You are creating your own success.

4. Make a zero tolerance policy with yourself concerning relapse. Don’t even allow your mind to go there.

5. Avoid fundamentalism, even in recovery. Rigid thinking and dogma can undermine your sobriety.

6. You are creating a life of recovery and you are responsible for ALL OF IT. Yes, others can help you. Their “help” is mere advice. It is up to you to recover.

7. Don’t confuse enthusiasm for action. Figure out what you need to do to stay sober and then do it.

8. Listen to what the relapsing addicts keep preaching. Then do the opposite.

9. Take care of your social network. Reach out to others in a meaningful way.

10. Figure out a way to help other addicts or alcoholics.

11. If you attend 12 step meetings, find one to start chairing. Consider H&I meetings (taking meetings into jails and treatment centers).

12. Use mindfulness and a heightened awareness to overcome ego. Use meditation to overcome self.

13. Practice forgiveness. Forgive all your past transgressors. Forgive yourself. You must do this to get long term relief from resentment.

14. Be aware of diminishing returns, and spread out your recovery efforts (i.e., don’t focus on just “spiritual” growth).

15. Rearrange all the furniture in your house. Anything to get through the night sometimes.

16. Clean your house from top to bottom. Same as above.

17. Go for a long walk.

18. Buy a pet and care for it.

19. Eat a gourmet meal.

20. Cook a gourmet meal.

21. Practice the arts. Paint, draw, sculpt, sing, dance. Etc.

22. See a therapist.

23. Work on a puzzle.

24. Connect with someone else who is hurting.

25. Start a project that is bigger than yourself.

26. Revisit an old hobby.

27. Teach someone something. (Anything!)

28. Learn something new each day. (Anything!)

29. Write in a daily journal.

30. Stretch yourself spiritually by suspending disbelief for a day.

31. Write a letter to your addiction where you say farewell to it.

32. Join a recovery forum online.

33. Start a free blog over at blogger.com and tell the world about your progress in recovery. Figure out your own tips on staying sober.

34. Reconnect with your family and spend time with them.

35. Go back to school.

36. Learn a new skill or trade.

37. Sponsor a newcomer.

38. Make a commitment to chair a meeting each week.

39. Celebrate the recovery of a friend.

40. Spend time with your family.

41. Email the spiritual river guy and tell him your problems.

42. Celebrate your clean time with a cake.

43. Write out a gratitude list.

44. Read through your old journal entries and see how much you’ve changed.

45. Try a new form of meditation (or make up your own…there is no “wrong” here). Some of the best tips to stay sober come from within.

46. Write out a to-do list and cross each thing off as you accomplish it.

47. Always have a big goal in the back of your mind that is challenging for you, but would make your day if you met it.

48. Practice balance. Challenge your daily habits.

49. Practice humility. Always be in “learning mode.”

50. Forgive yourself and move on with your life.

51. Sit down and write 2 goals out for yourself: one big one and one little one. Keep the paper in your pocket.

52. Inspire someone else to grow. Challenge them to be a better person in some way. Encourage them through your own success.

53. Learn to relax. Find your quiet place of rejuvenation and return to it often.

54. Elevate your consciousness. Watch your own mind and see how it responds to events. Repeat often. Learn.

55. Find the beauty in life. Appreciate all of it. Be grateful for beauty itself.

56. Ask yourself with each decision: “Is this the healthiest choice for me right now?”

57. Quit smoking cigarettes already.

58. Be grateful for existence.

59. If you go to the same AA meetings all the time, switch it up and go to a completely new meeting.

60. Write a poem about how you are overcoming addiction.

61. Turn off your television and read a book. Better: read recovery literature. Best: write your own recovery literature.

62. Use overwhelming force to conquer a goal.

63. Use the Sedona method to release emotions that are holding you back.

64. Write your bucket list. Then, act.

65. Figure out your life purpose.

66. Write out a fourth step and share it with your sponsor.

67. Take care of yourself physically. Exercise. Take a walk. No excuses.

68. Keep your priorities straight. Physical abstinence is number one. Simple and effective.

69. Keep a high price on your serenity. Don’t sacrifice it for just anyone and their whims.

70. Use a sponsor for stage 2 recovery. Let them guide you through holistic living.

71. Take care of yourself mentally. Go back to school. Get that degree.

72. Find your own path. It is your responsibility to do so.

73. Practice humility and stay teachable. Always be learning.

74. Go to long term treatment and be done with it. Best decision I ever made.

75. Don’t pin your hopes on a short stay in rehab. It takes more than that.

76. Call your sponsor.

77. Get a sponsor.

78. Use a zero tolerance policy when it comes to self-pity. Never allow it for yourself ever again. Ever. It is poison.

79. Read recovery literature.

80. Join a recovery forum.

81. Use outpatient treatment if that works for you. Take it as seriously as possible and connect with the others in your group.

82. Meditate.

83. Pray.

84. Go out for coffee with a friend in recovery.

85. Find your passion.

86. Work out.

87. Join a church.

88. Volunteer.

89. Take care of yourself emotionally. Don’t get knocked too far off your square.

90. Stay vigilant against potential relapse. The disease can find many routes (gambling, prescription drugs, sex, etc.).

91. Go to a meeting.

92. Don’t pin your hopes on long term treatment. It takes a lifetime of learning for alcoholics and recovering drug addicts to recover.

93. Use long term strategic thinking. Care for yourself, network with others, and pursue conscious growth.

94. Don’t ask “why me?” Instead, ask “how can I create the life I really want now?”

95. Call a friend in recovery.

96. Sit down and write out a gratitude list.

97. Don’t live in fear of relapse. I wasted 5 years on this. Embrace the creative life and know you are strong in recovery.

98. Get extreme. Figure out what you need to do to stay sober…then double it and add ten. That’s how hard you have to push yourself.

99. Raise the bar. Stop settling. Use your talents as a gift to the world and make a difference in some way.

100. Live consciously. Set deliberate goals and go after them with overwhelming force.

101. Embrace the creative life in recovery and live holistically.

SOURCE: Spiritual River | Addiction Help

[Guitarista]

Hiya Kensho and Nester's near and not so far,

The above list is from a site called spiritualriver.com and worth a look. Like this list it's a little AA and 12 step focused, but i take what i need and leave the rest if it's not my bag.

Alcoholic or not? Well, if my boozing is negatively affecting my relationships, work and above all my general happiness, then it is a problem for me whatever i call it.

Great to see you back here Frances. Keep it going my friend. It took me awhile to come to a place of acceptance with my boozing. I knew for these last few years after many a lapse/relapse what was happening, and how irrational and illogical my thinking was, but now i feel i have moved forward because of one major shift in my thinking. Acceptance. I now have a greater acceptance of my relationship with AL, but it has taken a long time to get this through my thick head. I now have a much greater ability to play the tape forward and know where i'll end up soon enough. The evidence is just too indisputable even to an old romanticiser like me.

Wishing everyone a safe, sober and magical week. G

[KENSHO]

I agree. It doesn't matter what you call it. If your alcohol use is impacting your life negatively - it is a problem for you. If you made it to this site by googling "how to stop drinking" or something like that - you're unhappy with your drinking, and have likely had trouble stopping on your own. "Normal" drinkers and people who can moderate don't have thoughts of "I really need to stop".

I'm having a bit of a grumpy day. I feel like I can't get a moment for myself - to gather my thoughts and plan. Some days, my kids fight for my attention and want every waking second of me, "Mama, mama, mama!". I am grateful my kids want my company, but there are some days I just need quiet!! I would drink at times like this in the past. Not that it really helped - well it numbed me for a bit, but then it made it worse. Not a consideration now, because I don't drink, just remembering.

Have a good rest of your weekend peeps. Don't let the holiday stress get to you!

[Rahulthesweet]

Hello Nesters,

I thought about Nosugar today. Well actually about what she has been telling all along about sugar, carbs, and how they can turn out to be a substitute for a dopamine starved brain .... the brain the way it I after one goes cold turkey.

Well I thought about it when I was reading (actually listening) to this amazing book I am reading which I talked about yesterday. For those who didn't get that just google " 10% Happier : How I tamed my voice in my head by Dan Harris"

I spend one hour walking at the park this Sunday afternoon admiring the chilly afternoon which was moist with the rain. As I walked, the ultra small rain drops dropped on my bald head and they didn't bother me as my mind was hot and yet at peace. Hot coz of the work out and at peace with my current state of sober mind and listening to this wonderful audio book.

Turns out the Dan fellow is quite a successful journalist in ABC news and unless you folks in states follow him ; let me tell ya he has one heck of a writing style, full of humour similar to the "Dry by Augusten".

In the book he confesses he being having an addictive personality since childhood when we should not stop eating candies or cookies. Then during profession life he became a war correspondence and got the high with reporting from dangerous parts of the world, then he became a cocaine addict, post becoming sober he got hooked to food and embarked on journey to discover religion, spirituality and how we can gain mental peace. It was actually his job as a religious reporter.

Reading it I could so relate to him for I too am sober at a similar age when he left drugs. He too traveling a lot in course of his job. And most importantly he like me had something which fulfilled his animal instinct he could not stop. Sugar, AL, drugs, work etc.

In the stage of the where I am in the book he is leading to tame the mental monkey. Not the beast of AL as we know but the mind in general. The mind which worries about future and thinks too much about past is like a restless monkey, which keeps jumping around. We can tame it by diverting its attention or rather making it numb by drugs or anything else which may increase dopamine levels like sugar, food etc . but this money mind comes back full swings rather full strength as an anxious one when we get sober. It keeps jumping around making us uncomfortable. No wonder initial period of sobriety are hard.

As I introspect myself now I see this monkey mind in me. Its been used to AL and lying low for so long it did not see life. And life makes my monkey mind crazy. Small thinks affect it! Small issue at work and it starts jumping around towards future and start seeing all rater worst possible outcome which is just an imaginary future making me upset. Then this monkey mind jumps back to past and takes out some old memory from past good or bad to make me emotional. As time is passing by this monkey mind is leading to live a more balanced life. Or is it ?

I observed my non drinking non alcoholic wife today over the Chinese restaurant where went today after planing my some upcoming birthday. She was too anxious for not being able to enjoy the soup, constantly seeing the phone for guest list, to do tasks. We were together and for she was not enjoying the soup and the company (ahem .. Me).
Monkey mind in action so I thought. Her monkey mindwas going all the way ahead to party making her anxious.

So where is no sugar in all this ? Well I recall she warned me during my earlier day of sobriety of not substituting any other "drug" like sugar. Maybe today I am a bit addicted to it. I looove food, ice cream, soda there is nothing wrong in love it but I feeling I am eating a bit to much and my pattern reminds me of my drinking.

Like AL and food, my monkey mind too needs to be tamed. While the author in the book is exploring meditation, I need to find my own answers. The best part is I KNOW AL or any other drug is not the answer.

It is also so storage when I have gone thru this phase of sobriety and I am beginning to see all the people who drink as alcoholics. Maybe I am not right in seeing this way. Maybe I think like that because most the people who come around me drink too much :

This cousin for example of mine whom I met yestarday who was my beer buddy and 7 month ago could relate to when I had told him that I was on detox (hence sober); but today just stared at me with a "look" when I told him I am done drinking for good. The look was "r u nutz !" Or "why would you leave the most precious thing in the (his) world : AL" . He even went on saying "are you now vegetarian too ?"

Then I met my wife friend who about a month back was a chain smoker and was now non smoker and did acknowledge while sipping his scotch next thing I need to leave this AL... Looking at me with appreciation.

Being sober I can do so many thing, analyze my thought, exeriance so much better, play with my kids, appreciate my wife who has been with me for all alomg during a very very dark phase of my life.

Can I even think of drinking again ... Oh yes I do ! I have this monkey brain but then I make sure my monkey brain throws the AL beast outside the parking lot evertime he tries to enter my apartment . and I will make sure he does it every time ...

Next in line for him ... Sugar and carbs ... Then I might take the money himself ...

[daisy45]

Soft Focus, that was such a valuable admission to put out there......makes every one of us sit up and take stock of how we feel right now........I would say it speaks for so many on this site who are not making it to that final quit. I know it has been probably the main thing holding me back.
Each person's 'enough is enough' comes in 'their' own time.....inevitably when they finally get it , will wonder why they didn't do it sooner. It takes time and experience(relapses, family effects, physical) , some not so much, before it finally sinks in.
I can feel the frustration of those that are sober a long time.....because they 'know', but they also know so much that they understand.....which I for one am grateful for....

[open halo]

daisy45 I totally agree, it is hard discussing your problems with AL with people who don't or haven't had any difficulty with it. When I have spoken with some of my friends, they can't seem to understand why I can't just stop after a couple. It must be frustrating sometimes for those on MWO that have found their way to be AF but they continue to support so many of us, because they get what we are going through.The wisdom and understanding from many on this site makes a world of difference for those of us battling with AL.

[NoSugar]

Just like the things about my kids that irritate me the most are the less than desirable ones we share, my frustrations arise here when I witness people making the same excuses and mistakes that I made for years.

The posts on the mod and med threads don't upset me at all - I don't see there reflections of myself that I don't like.

Just like we all want to protect our kids, there is a strong desire to help people here spare themselves what looks to some of us like inevitable pain. My main frustration is with the culprit, alcohol - not its victim so I'm sorry if any of my posts show exasperation with an individual. That isn't the intent.

Maybe those of us with some AF time could be looked at as well-meaning, sometimes overbearing parent-types who are acting out of love but who sometimes make mistakes.

xx, NS

[MossRose]

Hi all. I had a wonderful day with my friend. She has a very hard life yet is always a joy to be around. I have learned a lot about overcoming adversity from her. I am lucky to have her in my life.

Soft Focus - I don't think you are in denial. My dear brother has drank himself into a coma twice, lost his wife, kids, and job due to drinking and is now battling Stage-4 cancer directly related to his years of drinking, yet he still won't even admit that he has a problem with AL. That, my friend, is true denial. You are here. So you aren't in denial. That's the wrong word.

Respectfully, I would say you are bargaining. You can go either way here, right? You may be able to pull back, and drink socially. If that's an option, I am happy for you. I'm not being sarcastic. I really would be. Notice I don't use the word "moderate" because that's a word that we alkies use to make our drinking seem acceptable and controlled. True social drinkers wouldn't even consider using that word - it's not in their vocabulary. It doesn't need to be.

But you did mention that you didn't think you were an alcoholic because you haven't reached that "last step." I suppose that's one way to look at it, but from experience I can tell you that the "last step" doesn't happen in a a day. You don't just wake up one morning, have an AHA moment, and decide you need to quit drinking because you realize you are nearing the last step. It happens over the course of years, and one day you wake up, tired, hungover and full of shame, and you realize that the "last step" happened while you were too drunk to notice. Don't wait for that day. It's not pretty. Wishing you the best.

Beachy - you actually met Dr. Hoffer? I am so glad for you. He was a very intelligent and brave man. He certainly stayed true to his beliefs. I am loving the book. I took the niacin, and no flushing so far. I must be very deficient.

Rahul - I think of NS everyday!! Thanks for the post. I'm going to have to check out this book. It sounds interesting.

Hope everyone else is doing well.

[Roadside]

Hello Nesters,

I thought about Nosugar today. Well actually about what she has been telling all along about sugar, carbs, and how they can turn out to be a substitute for a dopamine starved brain .... the brain the way it I after one goes cold turkey.

Well I thought about it when I was reading (actually listening) to this amazing book I am reading which I talked about yesterday. For those who didn't get that just google " 10% Happier : How I tamed my voice in my head by Dan Harris"

I spend one hour walking at the park this Sunday afternoon admiring the chilly afternoon which was moist with the rain. As I walked, the ultra small rain drops dropped on my bald head and they didn't bother me as my mind was hot and yet at peace. Hot coz of the work out and at peace with my current state of sober mind and listening to this wonderful audio book.

Turns out the Dan fellow is quite a successful journalist in ABC news and unless you folks in states follow him ; let me tell ya he has one heck of a writing style, full of humour similar to the "Dry by Augusten".

In the book he confesses he being having an addictive personality since childhood when we should not stop eating candies or cookies. Then during profession life he became a war correspondence and got the high with reporting from dangerous parts of the world, then he became a cocaine addict, post becoming sober he got hooked to food and embarked on journey to discover religion, spirituality and how we can gain mental peace. It was actually his job as a religious reporter.

Reading it I could so relate to him for I too am sober at a similar age when he left drugs. He too traveling a lot in course of his job. And most importantly he like me had something which fulfilled his animal instinct he could not stop. Sugar, AL, drugs, work etc.

In the stage of the where I am in the book he is leading to tame the mental monkey. Not the beast of AL as we know but the mind in general. The mind which worries about future and thinks too much about past is like a restless monkey, which keeps jumping around. We can tame it by diverting its attention or rather making it numb by drugs or anything else which may increase dopamine levels like sugar, food etc . but this money mind comes back full swings rather full strength as an anxious one when we get sober. It keeps jumping around making us uncomfortable. No wonder initial period of sobriety are hard.

As I introspect myself now I see this monkey mind in me. Its been used to AL and lying low for so long it did not see life. And life makes my monkey mind crazy. Small thinks affect it! Small issue at work and it starts jumping around towards future and start seeing all rater worst possible outcome which is just an imaginary future making me upset. Then this monkey mind jumps back to past and takes out some old memory from past good or bad to make me emotional. As time is passing by this monkey mind is leading to live a more balanced life. Or is it ?

I observed my non drinking non alcoholic wife today over the Chinese restaurant where went today after planing my some upcoming birthday. She was too anxious for not being able to enjoy the soup, constantly seeing the phone for guest list, to do tasks. We were together and for she was not enjoying the soup and the company (ahem .. Me).
Monkey mind in action so I thought. Her monkey mindwas going all the way ahead to party making her anxious.

So where is no sugar in all this ? Well I recall she warned me during my earlier day of sobriety of not substituting any other "drug" like sugar. Maybe today I am a bit addicted to it. I looove food, ice cream, soda there is nothing wrong in love it but I feeling I am eating a bit to much and my pattern reminds me of my drinking.

Like AL and food, my monkey mind too needs to be tamed. While the author in the book is exploring meditation, I need to find my own answers. The best part is I KNOW AL or any other drug is not the answer.

It is also so storage when I have gone thru this phase of sobriety and I am beginning to see all the people who drink as alcoholics. Maybe I am not right in seeing this way. Maybe I think like that because most the people who come around me drink too much :

This cousin for example of mine whom I met yestarday who was my beer buddy and 7 month ago could relate to when I had told him that I was on detox (hence sober); but today just stared at me with a "look" when I told him I am done drinking for good. The look was "r u nutz !" Or "why would you leave the most precious thing in the (his) world : AL" . He even went on saying "are you now vegetarian too ?"

Then I met my wife friend who about a month back was a chain smoker and was now non smoker and did acknowledge while sipping his scotch next thing I need to leave this AL... Looking at me with appreciation.

Being sober I can do so many thing, analyze my thought, exeriance so much better, play with my kids, appreciate my wife who has been with me for all alomg during a very very dark phase of my life.

Can I even think of drinking again ... Oh yes I do ! I have this monkey brain but then I make sure my monkey brain throws the AL beast outside the parking lot evertime he tries to enter my apartment . and I will make sure he does it every time ...

Next in line for him ... Sugar and carbs ... Then I might take the money himself ...

Rahul, this sounds like an interesting read and many here benefit from memoirs that delve into the psyche behind alcoholism or addiction. 'Thrill seekers' that's what I call them. My chaplain points out I must have a crisis to attend to all the time, or I get bored. If I am not 'fixing' things or situations, I create problems to fix, much to my detriment because unknowingly I make it look like I am rash, impulsive (which I am),and one just bathed from the cuckoo's nest; there are social and political ramifications. Not that I am consciously doing this, I guess it is an attention mechanism, and am sort of ashamed of that, but it is probably the truth.

Another good memoir read is by Dr. Oliver Aimeson, "The end to my addiction". He was a cardiologist and alcoholic and he walks through his experiences of first being privileged w/$$ to gain entrance to affluent rehab centers but when the $$ ended he was astonished as to how soon he was on the street (not literally) but docs determined he was 'ok' to return to society, and he always returned like a fireball, diving right in to his old friend, AL. He talks of his anxiety and familial history of anxiety and predisposition to alcoholism. A good read.

I am eager to read Dan Harris' book. Thanks for sharing.

[Lavande]

Good evening Nesters,
My ultra busy weekend has come to an end, I am exhausted to make many comments. It is great to see people expressing their true thoughts & opinions - they all count
I am not big on labels where people are concerned. I think labels put too many restrictions on us & possibly alter our behaviors & even our outlook. Basically, I believe that if you think AL is a problem in your life then it probably is a problem. We all have the ability to choose - drink or don't drink. I am one of those people who wake up every morning & choose not to drink. We all have that choice to make each & every morning

Wishing everyone a safe & comfy night in the nest!

Lav

[ShawTHo]

hi everyone!

just want to drop by and greet ya all

[KENSHO]

Hi ShawTHo!

Glad you made it through the youngsters LAV - I bet you are a great grandma!

I was putting my daughter to bed tonight. (5 years old). When she was nearly asleep, she threw an arm around me and snuggled super close. We snuggle often, but this time I fast forwarded to those teenage times that she will put herself to bed and want nothing to do with me. I just drank up her affection and found myself tremendously thankful that I was neither drunk, nor agitated, nor asleep. A moment that I was able to enjoy while she is still young and sweet. :heartbeat:

Exactly a week ago I was saying "phuckit" and giving in to my brain's desire for alcohol. I wasn't enjoyable in any way, and it took good time and effort away from my week to get back on track. I really can't believe how different I feel when drinking and not drinking. It's like night and day - in so many ways and in all areas of my life. Glad that teeter-totter is over...what a waste of time. It's not worth the "fitting in" or "just one" bullshit conversation. It's just a pain in the ass I want to be done with.

[Pavati]

Good night, everyone:

I had a lovely evening with great friends - lots of laughs. I was momentarily annoyed that I couldn't drink - they started with Manhattans and then red wine with the pasta. I smelled the wine for some stupid reason, and while I didn't want to drink per se, I was annoyed that I couldn't. It reminded me that I felt like that for a while at the beginning of this whole thing. I am grateful that feelings like that come very infrequently, and don't last for long. I soon forgot about the drinking and had a great time. I drove home, passed two cars stopped by police. Grateful to be sober.

Welcome, ShawTHo. What's your story? Good to have you here.

Happy Sober Sunday -

Pav