Newbies Nest

[Pinecone]

Good morning friends,

Daisy, great job, that is how it is done. I'm glad you posted too! A very wise person once told me that "it is a process and not an event." We have to have the individual wisdom to seek out what we truly need to get through what we are currently facing, just like you did. This needs to be a safe place to come and get support. We are the ones who know what it is like. Around my 2 year AF anniversary, I started to have this fear that I would drink again, even though I really didn't want to. I stayed quiet about it for a while because I didn't want to post about it. I guess I thought that I was supposed to be "better" by that point. It bothered me until I posted about it and received wonderful support. It was just that damn voice, trying another avenue to get me to think about it. The support I received made me realize that. I got to give up drinking (which I always wanted to do) and now I get to hang out with some very outstanding people on this forum. I'm ok with that!

Minstar, I posted from my phone quickly last night so my thoughts may have come out kind of choppy. Looking back on it, I'm so glad I had all the extra mind peace and clarity that comes with some AF time, both for daughter and for myself. Parenting is pretty challenging at certain points, and so, so rewarding at others. It's like watching one of the best movies you've ever seen and you don't want to pause it to get up to pee because you are completely immersed in it. When she was around three, she discovered her considerable will power. That was pretty tough for everyone in the house, but we made it! There are certainly more challenges to come and I intend to be able to meet them as I should.

Pav, agree 100% about the patience gained vs. "Ahh I need a drink!" Stress is a part of life and as living creatures, we will adapt to it. When we are done hiding in the bottle, we will by necessity look for ways to really address stress and other issues in our lives.

[trinity875]

Hello everyone day seven for me! I can't remember the last time I did one day before coming back here! Oddly I woke this morning craving a drink first thing.... I was not a morning drinker it was always late afternoon/teatime onwards. Very strange however it soon passed. I am going to make that list of reasons not to do that it's set in stone for me to refer to. Maybe even on a thread on here so I can add to it. Hope everyone is having a great day! X

[KENSHO]

I love your words Pinecone - "When we are done hiding in a bottle..."

We got used to "not living" and numbing everything out. After some AF time, we realize that it was no existence at all. Quitting drinking becomes the willingness and desire to live life as it should be lived - to feel what it has to offer, good and bad. I heard a recent interview with an author talking about grief. He made a statement something like this... "It's when we simply face what we're so afraid to - that's when the peace comes." I can't advocate enough for how good and rewarding it feels to live an authentic life with all of its extremes - that can't happen with alcohol in the picture.

Have a great day everyone. I think I need to go to bed earlier, though I'm a night owl. I would love if the world started at 9:00 instead of 8:00.

[Byrdlady]

Good Morning, Nesters!

You know there is a very powerful resource available from MWO to conquer these thoughts and those are the hypnosis CD's. I may be sounding like an infomercial (and trust me, I HATE THOSE) but the people that have used them say they really helped change your thinking without having to THINK about it. If you haven't tried them and are white knuckling, it's worth a shot. Don't forget the L-Glut, too....people swear by that.

If thoughts always became actions I'd be arrested by now! They are JUST thoughts....push them aside! Here's our cheer for the day: Push em out, push em out.....waaaaaay out! :rara:

We have some big milestones today! Jane is clocking in at ONE YEAR! Hard to imagine, yet here we are one year later celebrating this huge event. Who are you wearing? ehehehe.....Congratulations on this, it is customary to give a speech!

As it is for our 30 day'ers!! Kensho is logging in with 30 days!! WOOOOOO HOOOOOO. Eloise must get so tired of me stealing her thunder....but I can't help it! So proud! :guy:

Trinity....scoring the hardest of all the days....7. I tell you, they don't get rougher than those, and they are now behind you! :butt: We are standing cheek to cheek with you on this one. GREAT going!

Take it from me, it is 1000 times easier to maintain a quit (even ONE day) than it is to start over. Nothing NEW is going to happen when you drink, it's going to be the same old SH*T times 10. No itch is scratched, no goal accomplished. Taking a drink is a step BACKWARDS and we are all too old to be doing that! Forward HO! Hup 2, 3, 4...... NO TURNING BACK! It's just awful back there! (take it from me). Have a day of gratitude! Byrdie

[Altaman]

Congrats Trinity on Day 7!!! Well done.
I'm on Day 9 and agree with others, Day 7 is tough.
Hopefully neither of us will ever need to experience a Day 7 again!

Altaman

[Overit-still]

Good morning to everyone in the nest today. I strapped on tight last night. going through some pretty sucky stuff in my life right now and choosing to be sober is the first decision I got right. I've got a lot of "life changing" decisions to make..............anyway, have a great day and stay sober!

[available]

Jane happy 1 year a massive achievement.

Kensho, day 30 and no going back now. Not saying it is a bed of roses but each day brings us closer to the mind peace that comes in time. You are sounding happy and content. Great work. Oh i want the world to start at 9am too instead of 5.30am. bahh!

Trin congrats on 7 days, i was over the moon that I could actually get there. Instead of drinking with everyday that had a Y in it i didnt drink with everyday that had a Y in it. a much better feeling being sober!

Alt there are a lot of tough days to get through to get to to a place where you dont want to drink. Keeping on here and being accountable was one of the key factors for me. As long as i dont drink for today it has to be better than when i did drink.

[BeachGirly]

Kens - way to go on 30 days!!! You must be feeling fantastic, and so proud of yourself.

Trinity - 7 days is huge. You have made a commitment!

Jane - I congratulated you on another thread, but way to go again. One year- whoot whoot.

Alt - your days are adding up. Good job.

BG

[MinStar]

Evening nesters!
Congrats to those with wonderful milestones- trinity, kensho, Jane and alt!

Over it- well done on not giving in. That is one thing you can control.

Pav and Kensho- thanks for your earlier post. I have rad a few of those books. Going to start chapter 3 in Wild. Good stuff.

I also like easy reads to allow my mind to wonder into another place, world and time.

I sometimes listen to radio 4 stories on BBC I player. Like someone reading me a bedtime story for a change lol.

Ok short one as a big soak in the tub and I want to read a little befo bed.

Think it's d3 for me. I'm trying not to count to hard. Did have an urge to drink but pushed it to the back of my mind. After dinner bath and now no craving.

Stay safe nesters x

[Resolve]

Over it - glad you're back. I didn't get the bag comments from earlier but then remembered your old avatar. The early days are sucky and crappy enough without heavy duty issues, and I don't need to be repetitive and tell you what you know. Drinking won't make them any less so and will give you more reasons to feel the piling on factor. Taking back control as you have will only lead to good things so keep the over-it mindset strong, and remember how great it is to wake up sober. Now we're going to need a new avatar...

Minstar - congratulations on the new baby! What a great commitment you're making for your children and you.

My world is freakin cold! How the hell do all of our Canadian friends deal with it? I'm a mid-Atlantic area guy and it's damn cold enough without hitting the negative degree figures. I spend enough time in cold rinks and have old man hands to prove it, but I just feel colder this year even though winter is just rearing its head. I guess I didn't really notice or feel that cold being under the influence the past 25 or so winters, and it gives new meaning to stone cold sober.

And Kensho - it's your last time at 30 (except in years of course). Your posts lately show you're really feeling all the AF time you've racked up the past six or seven months. Keep them coming.

[open halo]

Jane, Kensho and Trinity big Congrats on your milestones. Very inspiring all around!

Minstar, I love reading easy reads as well, when you are a busy mom, that's what seems to work the best! I agree with Pav, Angela's Ashes and Memoirs of a Geisha are also really great. So is She's Come Undone by Wally Lamb if you haven't read that one. Remember during difficult days the MWO is always here to help!

Resolve, yep you are right it is G*&*&^ Cold even for us Canadians, we just get through it, no choice, I guess that's why we are a hockey country! I have a lot of family in the Northern States, and they are always surprised that no matter what the weather, the schools never close! The "Snow days" their kids get just never happen here, they may cancel the buses from time to time, but the schools are open, snowshoe your way in if you like!

Have a great AF Wednesday everybody!!!

[Lavande]

Good evening Nesters,

Yeah, it's cold & WINDY which makes it even worse Brrrrr!!!
Resolve, are you near me? Hope we don't get the massive snow we had last winter

Jane, CONGRATS to you on your one year AF :yay:
I'm very happy for you, keep up the good work!

Every day sober is a great day kids - just keep moving forward, never look back. Ignore the annoying thoughts/voices, it's all BS. You came to MWO to change your life & it can be done with a solid commitment!

Wishing everyone a safe & warm night in the nest! Hang on, use the Velcro!!

Lav

[Byrdlady]

Hey All,
This re post may not be relevant to any recent topic, but I was going thru my stash of stuff looking for something, and thought this was too good to sit in my folder, it might help someone. It's from Kuya:

The most abusive relationship is the one we have with ourselves. I am my own child. I was born perfect and beautiful ( I KNOW that, I have seen the photos :smile:) This is how I have been treating my child. I have starved her for years with eating disorders. Told her she was fat and ugly time and time again. Made her work far too hard and gave her hardly any breaks. No matter how well she did or hard she worked I was never satisfied with her I never treated her to enough new clothes or did nice things for her to make her feel good. I fed her drugs every day to shut her up so I didn't have to listen to her. When she was obviously getting ill I ignored her and didn't get her help. If this was a child you were given to raise you would be jailed for neglect.

[daisy45]

After a day of flight delays, happy to have my babies back home! OK, they may be 20, 21 and 23, but my babies all the same....always good to get them back safe and sound!
Night all.....hope you all wake up happy and sober in the morning!

[KENSHO]

Happy evening! If you have forgotten, make a PLAN and use your TOOLS! I have had to be reminded to actually DO this several times! Stay safe... I'm going to go get lost in a book instead of work. :eek-new: