Newbies Nest

[A new page]

Hey Freaks! Jk, kinda :kisses:...


2 lives were lost that day, one died and one that will spend alot of alone time in prison, begging to have that day back. All we have to do is go home to our familys and not drink. I'll take that over the later.
Not trying to be morbid, it's real life stories like this that I use protect my quit.
Stay Hard my peops!

Very sad story, Matt. Thanks for the reminder to stay quit!!!

[Guitarista]

Yo Nester's near and not so far.

Here's some brand new fresh butt velcro for the weekend. Just took delivery of a truckload in the warehouse. It interrupted the great snooze i was havin on the forklift, but i rose to the challenge and left a few pallets at the door.

Wishing everyone a safe, sober and magical weekend. Kick some arse in your own way. G

[KENSHO]

Be sure to make a plan everyone. What will you do when that unexpected person hands you a drink or invites you out? Or when you get bored and everyone else is drinking?

For me? Movie and sleep. I LOVE sleep. Someone just said it, you can't drink when you sleep!

Rip... Passing velcro left.

[Altaman]

Good evening fellow nesters!

Overit - - I watched the You Tube video linked on your posts. Scary? No kidding. I'd encourage everyone in the nest to make the time to watch this.

We know we're dealing with a potentially life threatening disease, this video puts a face on the risks we take, what we put our loved ones through and the potential outcome of our actions.

We're off on a holiday tomorrow, 5 days in Toronto then 10 days in Punta Cana. Alcohol will be everywhere but I'm confident that I'll be able to stay strong. And I'll be checking in here as often as I can, thanks everyone in advance for your support!

Day 11 today, been a good day!

Hope everyone has a great AL free weekend!

Altaman

[Lavande]

Good evening Nesters,

Wishing you a wonderful & safe AF trip Altaman ~ sounds nice

Matt, sorry to hear about the fatality, they are rough. My 18 year old nephew caused his own fatal accident nearly 12 years ago. The kid was 5 minutes out of high school, had a whole lifetime ahead of him but he had to have that beer. Sad

Resolve, not quite in the metro DC area but I can walk out my door & walk across the state line into Maryland in just 1/4 mile My son works in DC but lives up here too - very similar weather patterns.

It wasn't quite as cold today, it hit a balmy 34 degrees, LOL
Wishing everyone a safe & cozy night in the nets. Thanks for the extra butt Velcro G

Lav

[Overit-still]

G-I knew I could count on you. Strapping in now, headphones on, grooving.............

[Overit-still]

Be sure to make a plan everyone. What will you do when that unexpected person hands you a drink or invites you out? Or when you get bored and everyone else is drinking?

For me? Movie and sleep. I LOVE sleep. Someone just said it, you can't drink when you sleep!

Rip... Passing velcro left.

Thanks for the Velcro Kensho. Maybe we can sit together?

My obstacle is that my spouse is an alcoholic also and still drinks, in the house. Fortunately, not my drink of choice. So, it's hard to find a place to "get away from it" but like I said, I don't like his drink so it doesn't entice me in ANY way! But, it will be awhile before I put myself in any other position where alcohol is present. I love to read and drink my seltzer.

[Overit-still]

Just wondering if anyone has any of the CD's I could "check out" or borrow?

[BeachGirly]

Hi Over-it
I do not have the cd's but have considered ordering them.
I do have some subliminal messages cd's, which are nice to listen to - and something is working.
Subliminalmp3s.com

Let me know if you order and what you think
BG

[Pavati]

Hi, Everyone:

Maybe while you're waiting for the CDs, try the Calm App, or just listening to a good podcast. Did anyone listen to Serial? It was compelling and definitely will take your mind off drinking.

I had a lot of anxiety today for no apparent reason - it doesn't happen to me much any more. I didn't think of alcohol until my husband came home and made himself a big drink and I had a thought - dang that would make me feel better quickly. Two seconds later I had that same consideration you were talking about Resolve - I thought through the drink and I KNOW that one drink is not what I want. I can't remember the last time I had one drink and didn't want more. More would happen eventually, and that would lead me back to a BAD place in my life. Thankfully, that all happened in about three seconds, and I was on to another topic in my head. Thoughts like those keep me coming back here, though. Don't want to become complacent.

Let me add my voice to the ACCEPTANCE cheer, also. When I finally, truly accepted that I can't drink it was so freeing! No more bargaining with myself, no more denial, no more excuses like Byrdie mentions - just honesty with myself that could only lead to healing. I know I sound like some foo foo cheer leader bs artist to some of you (as others did to me), but quitting drinking has been the best thing I have done for myself in a long time (excluding having my kids!)

Matt - What a sad story. What a tragedy for both families. And a good lesson about what NOT to do.

OK - good night, all. Happy Friday. A plan a plan a plan. Even if your plan is reading about the plans in the Tool Box, focus on not drinking. And secure your velcro.

xo
Pav

[Matt M.]

Great post Pav sound, reinforcing advice.

[lifechange]

Good MAE Nesters!
I'm posting quite late, seeing that I've been up for 4.5 hours already.
Did some great reading in the Toolbox last night-- I started reading at the end and was very touched especially by Mr. G's and ABcowboy's very honest posts and Pav's 1 year "speech". All so inspiring to me-- I want to be able to see myself clearly, to be brutally honest with myself, to ACCEPT who I am and to make the changes necessary to have a life worth living.
For me, a big part of accepting has been/is getting rid of the stigma of alcoholism. I guess that is for most of us-- realising that the genetic part of it, the chemical part of it, isn't my fault. Continuing to drink when I know what I know is my responsibility but I can see why it's been so difficult.
I loved this article, posted by NS in the Toolbox, about changing the way we think of recovery. Def. worth a read!

http://www.huffingtonpost.co.uk/carrie-armstrong/alcoholism-please-dont-give-up-drinking_b_2760742.html

Overit, I can only imagine how difficult it is to quit drinking when someone else in the house is a problem drinker. Does your Husband realise he's an alcoholic? Has he expressed a desire to stop drinking someday? What's your plan for the weekend?

Kensho, good point on having a plan.
My plan is basically to stay at home where there is no alcohol. I have to do a bit of shopping but if I have the slightest pull towards drinking, I will wait until tomorrow. And sleep! Next week I have a situation where I'll need to have a detailed plan-- a work dinner that I HAVE to go to. I already told a work friend that I won't be drinking and fortunately we have a big event to prepare for the next day--I can use that as an excuse if I have to.

I hope everyone is well..

[enzo'smom]

OMG…..I have always thought about not drinking as giving it up. The article life change posted (also in toolbox) is so dead-on how I was thinking during last attempts that it almost made me cry!! I always felt like I was being punished somehow….that we were all here because we were bad and that together, we could forge ahead as a group of "bad people" who couldn't control their drinking. I never would have admitted that then, but upon reflection, that is exactly how I felt. And, of course, it lead me right back to the bottle. This time, I am really taking a look at this whole disease differently. that article is so powerful!!!! and yes, I am just not drinking anymore. I am not giving it up. I am just not doing it anymore.

The other change from last time is that I have have flushed all mind altering prescriptions down the toilet and all liquor has been removed from my house. when I go to restaurants, I sit with my back to the bar. I do not drink anything out of a wine glass…..I am even considering packing them up and putting them in storage to be taken out sometime in the future if I have a party and I can handle it.

wow. I thought last time I was doing what needed to be done and oh, how wrong I was.

[Lavande]

Good Saturday morning Nesters,

Up way too early thanks to my dogs, oh well!
Made myself some good coffee & I have forgiven them, Ha Ha!

Jennie, it sounds like you have mastered the concept of acceptance - good for you
Moving away from deprivation thinking is a big deal! Wishing you the best!

Pav, anxiety used to be a daily battle for me, I understand. You handled yourself well thinking it through & knowing that one drink wasn't the answer. It takes practice but we can learn to trust ourselves & look within for answers instead of automatically reaching out for AL or Rx meds & the like. Distraction has been a very effective tool for me

Wishing everyone a great AF Saturday!

Lav

[patrice]

Wow it's taken me so long! Yes acceptance seems to be the key. I never did accept that I couldn't jsut have one drink..
Also the stopping versus giving up thing ... That's powerful too!
Take care all
Patrice