Newbies Nest

[Byrdlady]

NS that makes so much sense. Thank goodness for all if you. So Byrdie, I get to relive my twenties?!

Yep, excep it ain't so great when you're 50! :haha:

I'm not sure how old you are, Kensho!! I'd never ask a lady her age! I'm not thupid. :eyes:
You are just a young thing, you will do great!! xo

[jane27]

Hi Nesters,
I’m dealing with some upheaval. Our basement flooded and stuff is everywhere. Things could definitely be worse but my body feels heavy and I don’t feel like doing a darn thing. Everything seems like too much. On the subject of drinking- not drinking is so much easier than drinking was. Drinking was like a psychological, iron man horror show. I didn’t own myself & I couldn’t stop. It was terrible. I wouldn’t wish it on my worst enemy. For anyone struggling with a rough day or a craving, I highly recommend taking a nap. There’s an excellent chance that when you wake up, you’ll feel better. Wishing everyone love and strength to get through another day.

[Guitarista]

Hola nesters near and not so far,

Geez Jane, that sounds like a P.I.T.A! Reminds me of some time i spent working on a building site when travelling Europe. Me and another fella had the job of pumping water from a lift well in the basement every day after rain. The industrial strength pump was a big help, but luckily not much chance of any water damage as it was all just concrete. I hope any damage is minimal and you can get it flood proof. All the best with it! Take care of yourself my friend.

Hope y'all are having a safe, sober and magical week. At day 51, i sure am. Gratitude mode, and i know anything is possible when i put my mind to it.

Think positive nesters. G

[Matt M.]

Hey everyone just checking in, all is well.
Hope everyone is doing awesome!
Stay Hard and Stay the course!

[Lavande]

Good evening Nesters,

My grandsons are tuned in to Thomas cartoons so things are relatively quiet at the moment
I think I hear their mother walking in now - nice!

Wishing everyone a safe & warm night in the nest!

Lav

[Stevo]

Big G'day from Australia.
Quick update on my turmoil-I spoke to the guy who is assessing my claim and he was very apologetic,it turns out that he thought it was all good to go and actually there needs to be a little more investigating.He actually seems like a genuinely nice guy.He has sent me a list of the things that they are looking into and I am pretty sure they will not find anything that will jeopardise my claim.He got in touch with me this morning and told me that he is pushing for a provisional payment(not too sure what that is)for me until the whole process is finished.I told him that I would be happy to provide anything that would make the claim go through quicker and he said that it was his priority to get my claim finished as quick as possible.So all in all it is far from over but this guy definitely seems to be on my side.
No thoughts of picking up or anything like that,but I did have some insanely morbid thoughts this morning when I woke up.I started thinking that this situation was going to consume me,I have been through so much since coming back into recovery with no relief.My thoughts were turning to "I don't know how much more of this I can take."
Anywho I got the call and it was nice to hear that the assessor is going to try to get a special payment and although I have not been paid yet and nothing has changed for my family the war isn't over.

[Hanna]

Hi nesters
Well, another successful day, although this afternoon something interesting happened. I have to say that the obnoxious voice convincing me that I want to drink has amazingly quieted down recently. That being said, I got the thought that I wanted to drink this evening sometime in the afternoon. I actually walked into a store called traitor joes, as iwas passing it. This store sells among other things, inexpensive but decent wine. I purposely have been carrying very little cash, but I walked in and looked at the price of the wine. It was $3 a bottle. I actually looked in my wallet, where I had two singles, and then checked my change. I had enough to by a bottle and stood there about 3 minutes, before leaving the store empty handed. I don't know why this happened. I drove home, had a snack, and began making dinner.

Anyway, the rest of the evening was fine. Man this addiction is sneaky, huh? Glad I made the choice I did. I kept thinking about how, while instill have discomfort in the late afternoons, I don't want to give up what I have achieved, and I don't want to go back to the misery that drinking became for me. I also don't want to go through the first days of quitting again. Reminding myself of that helps a lot.

Have a wonderful night and stay warm! (Ok it was in the 80's here today lol)

[Pavati]

Hi, Nest:

OK, sorry for this one, fellas. Skip the following paragraph if you are so inclined.

I listened to the Bubble Hour on menopause and drinking today. (Did that scare you away?) ANYWAY - I have been more anxious and depressed this last month and a half, and had more bouts of insomnia. In listening to the episode, I was reminded that the symptoms of peri-menopause mimic the symptoms of early quit alcohol withdrawal - no wonder they feel familiar. The drinker in me thinks - wow, a shot would make me feel much better right now. Fortunately, the sober person in me is much stronger and knows other ways to get through these feelings - I have developed healthy strategies. I just wanted to share in case anyone else has those same feelings. I am wondering if those feelings are also responsible for the large number of us women here in their 40s and 50s? Just a thought.

Back to the regularly scheduled programming...

Matt - good to see you check in. I miss your posts - anything else going on? Remember, participation in a community is very important to sobriety. I can't remember if you go to meetings or not, but we're here for you - don't forget.

OMG, Lav, I could probably recite every Thomas cartoon ever made - my kids loved them. Have fun.

We are in the midst of another DRY winter here in California. Hardly any snow in the Sierras, and really only two rainstorms so far. I'm sorry for all of you buried back east - wish we could take some of it off your hands.

Remember - don't drink, no matter what.

Pav

[jane27]

Kensho,
I was afraid that MY whole identity was gone without my liquid courage. As we say in the South, I couldn't have been wronger. Eheheh.
You are now 70 days OUT of the hole....if you compare that to how long you were IN the hole, it is a mighty short span, no?

Kensho, 70 days is solid stuff. Congratulations & keep on fighting the good fight.

Byrdie, loved your post. Xo

[enzo'smom]

Pavati: this 51 year old totally agrees…. as for me, the drinking didn't get out of control until my kids were much more self sufficient. When they were babies, I had no focus on myself at all…..I was looking at old videos last week of the kids and there I am, always caring for them, making sure they are well fed, clean, happy….but when I look at my expression, I see the exhaustion on my face…stress…..and the depression….so as they got older and were able to move about the house without me watching their every move, I was able to drink more. I was able to have that second glass…..and then the third……and for a short period of time, it helped my depression and stress. Fast forward 10 years and the progression was very very slow but whaaaa laaaaa…..
so now I am focusing on getting to know myself again. I lost myself when I had my kids and instead of getting myself back as they got older,,,,, I gave myself up to alcohol….
the good news is, I have two wonderful boys with typical teenaged ups and downs and for that I am so very grateful……AND the dreaded menopause is over for me too!!!! (sorry if that is TMI for you guys out there)

[Lavande]

Good morning Nesters,

Sunny but temps in the single digits around these parts -Brrrrrr!!

Hanna, take those moments, such as you had in Trader Joe's as mini lessons! You were tempted but you did not fall. You are now a little stronger! Same thing goes for the inevitable drinking dreams when they pop up - scary but they are good reinforcements

Pav, I was a victim of hormone hell too coupled with killer anxiety & depression. My doctors just looked at me like I had 8 heads or something & offered no help. I turned to wine, sad but true
So grateful that is long over!

Jane, hope everything is OK with you!

jennie, enjoy your kids while they are still home. I still miss my kids but they live close enough so we see each other often enough & I get to play with the grandkids. Turns out this IS the best time in life & I wanted to live it with a clear head & heart. I remain ever grateful

Wishing everyone a great AF Wednesday, Hump day, Ash Wednesday....

Lav

[mywayin]

a store called traitor joes, as iwas passing it. This store sells among other things, inexpensive but decent wine.

How funny Hanna "Traitor" Joes !!!

[mywayin]

Hanna, in fact, your experiene is scary. I wonder if you can identify the psycological process that made you get so close to betraying your quit, and then what made you pull back ??? I think it would be helpful to analyse it and hopefully recognise it coming in the future without getting so close to the cliff!

[NoSugar]

How funny Hanna "Traitor" Joes !!!

Isn't autocorrect fun? And this one had meaning! Hanna, please make a plan so you don't take it that far again, ok? Post on MWO first, text a friend, whatever - and like Lav said, you'll be stronger than before this happened if you use it to your advantage. I bet you felt relieved when you woke up this morning! Have a great day -NS.

[Byrdlady]

Good Morning, Nesters!
Finally feeling human again after some alien tummy bug invasion. I will spare you the gory details as it ripped thru every organ of my limp and near-lifeless body (that may be slightly exaggerated).

Jane, GREAT to see you posting, but I am sorry to hear of your troubles. I saw the pictures you posted over on the 'Mission' thread. Man, that is a lot of stuff. But, in the end, that's all it is.... If there had been people or pets devastated by this water, your loss would be irreplaceable, as you know. As bad as it was, and as much as it hurts your heart, it really ALL can be replaced by new stuff. Right? In fact, I bet you didn't even know what to do with all this stuff anyway, am I true? Maybe it's best days are in your memory and they can serve a new purpose with someone that could really use a new _____. I have found that the more I GIVE, the more I GET in return. Maybe getting this stuff out and over to a consignment shop or Salvation Army (TAX write-off!!) is the best plan and just get it out of there. New beginnings! Instead of letting this STUFF drag you down and weigh heavy, let it do some GOOD. Let it go!
Trust me, I have closets full of things that I have purged and after it's done, it feels GOOD! If I haven't used something in 2 years, I prolly don't need it! Just a thought. The Salvation Army will send a truck over to the house and pick it up! I know it's hard...but out with the old, in with the new! It will make you feel lighter (body and soul!!) Hugs to you....

Hanna....to this day, I stay out of the wine aisle at my grocer's. I know Trader Joe's has it there at the registers sometimes. Don't make eye contact! I tell you, I treat AL as if it were a rattlesnake (I stay the hell away from it). This is the stuff that nearly brought down a 25 year marriage and a fairly sturdy byrd. I do not flirt with it at all (all romance gone). As Lav instructed me, I made a vow to NEVER DRINK OR BUY IT AGAIN. I haven't. Have you seen that movie, "Flight"? When (my man) Denzel says when it comes to AL, I didn't have another lie in me. That's me. He also says that being in a physical prison is hands down better than being in AL prison. If you are sick and tired of lying about AL, vow to buy or drink NO more. It is a promise I have kept because I was sick of making excuses for AL. You passed a very important test yesterday and I am so thankful you came out the other side. There is NO good for us in that bottle, not even temporarily. It took me 10 days shy of a year to get and keep my quit. Every single time I blew it, I can tell you, there was NO JOY or RELIEF about it. It no longer scratched THAT itch. It didn't relieve anything in fact it made everything WORSE. But that's just me.

I hope everyone has a stellar Hump Day! Stay strong! No matter what! Byrdie