Newbies Nest

[abcowboy]

Hello everyone! Reading back and smiling to myself, oh, how I was soooo much like everyone else, trying to make my quit stick! I didn't find the first days or even weeks that hard, it was after about my third week of not drinking that the going got tough! My AV convinced me that I really didn't have a problem and that I could be a normal drinker! Well, ask yourself, what is a "normal drinker"? What does normal drinking mean to you? Or is drinking normal at all? If having one or two drinks is normal, then so is puffing one or two joints, or doing one or two lines of coke! If you can convince yourself that drinking is normal, then why isn't everything else considered normal? It's all in attitude and acceptance. When you develop the attitude that drinking isn't normal, then you'll accept the fact that you don't need AL to get you through the day, no more than you need a joint or a line of coke to help you through. So next time you feel like stopping in the liqour store, why not imagine yourself going to see your "dealer", after all, that's what the store really is...

One thing talked about in recovery is "playing the tape to the very end" I look at is as imagining to myself what I'll do in the next 24 hours if I pick up that first drink, then try to imagine the 24 hours after that. It is never a pretty picture, and one that I never want to paint again....

Have a great day everyone, and stay away from the "dealers"

[Hypernova]

Morning everyone. Happy I made it through the night in the city w/o booze. ~~ Thanks to Lav, Turnagain & overit for your support and kind words. ~ Lost Soul you are in a good spot, welcome and think of the song ~ I once was Lost but now I'm AF ~ & cowboy you are right, dealers they are, only difference is they have multi million/billion dollar advertising pushing their wares. ~ Well off to work and glad today is day 5, easily could have been day one again but I put my plan in action. best to everyone

[LilBit]

Thank you, Lav an everyone for the good wishes. My event went well, and I actually handled the nerves better without the AL, which was a surprise.

Lav, yay for your melted snow. It's officially Spring, now so hopefully that was the last round.

Enzo'smom, I had someone tell me that sparkling water dehydrates you, too. Like LB said, it's a myth. I did some research and found numerous credible websites that also verified it.The myth's origin was based on the observation that bubbly water makes you feel more full and so you're likely to drink less of it than normal water.

Hypernova and LostSoul, welcome back. I am a "returner" too. This time is SO different because I let go the notion of ever, ever, ever being able to (or now -- wanting to) drink again. Before, my mentality was "Let's see how this goes." Now, it's "My life depends on this." You can do this!

Bully for you, Available, for sticking it out AF through the tough times. That's what separates the happy from the zombies.

I'm headed to a quaint town on the California Delta in a Mini Cooper convertible for some shop browsing, lunch and just walking around. Have a lovely Sunday.

[LavenderBlue]

Hypernova and Lost Soul - Welcome back! Settle in and get comfy, the Nest is great support and I know you can both do this. Keep reading and posting and know we're all here for you.

Hannah - My sleep has/still is taking time to really get back to where I want it; but the sleep I get is much more refreshing. Hang in there, I know it'll get better! Also sales like that are always win! I'm not a huge shopper anymore unless it's books or games, but even I'd be thrilled with boots at that price!

LilBut - Yay you for getting through that event! It's crazy sometimes when you realize that the thing you went to to calm your nerves...actually made them worse! So glad it went well you you.

Lav - I know that feeling when the snow melts, so glad it's not hanging around for ya. Our temps have dropped here back down to mid 40'sF (around 7C) but at least we haven't had more snow yet. A couple years ago we got just DUMPED on in the beginning of May!

Ava - I'm so impressed/proud/happy for you that you've made it through AF and are in a better headspace now. That news was no joke and I hope you're proud of yourself for handling it and getting through the worst.

I had some plans of mine get canceled last night and wound up reading through other threads on here for a while. (abcowboy, you are so supportive no matter where you post! ) The more I read, the more it really gets more solid for me that I'm not someone who can ever try to moderate again; that bird has flown if it was ever an option for me. It's like last time I quit smoking - I got to the point where cigarettes didn't sound good to me anymore, but then got a case of the screw-it's and picked up a pack. In no time at all I went from "ewww, this doens't taste right anymore" to a pack or more a day. Right now, my last memories of AL are miserable, the last thing I need is to have a "good" night that includes AL to muddy up that memory.

Don't get me wrong, my plan (once I finally got here, at least) was always to quit entirely. But I know things come up and it can be tempting; sure happened to me with smoking last time. It is literally easier for me NOT to drink when my most recent memories are horrible than if I actually DID "do ok" for a bit. The crappiness that was my life when I started posting here isn't something I care to repeat, but I need THOSE memories to stay put. It's like it's easier for me to not drink soda when I don't have any at all than if I was still having a couple cans a week. Those one or two turn into more a lot easier than none does.

Ok, time to get a move on. I need to make a late breakfast and get out to the grocery store. I get to buy mostly healthy foods, which feels good, and not have to try to make an extra stop for AL or try to figure out which store to go to this time. I don't have to hide things in my trunk until no one's looking, and I don't have to rush my errands to get back home and drink.

Oh! Cept one more plus of not drinking. Now that I'm looking healthier, there's a few guys from my past that have been messaging me. If I was still drinking, I'd already be fretting about how they'd probably invite me over for drinks at some point, and how did I want to act if they did and would I keep my boundaries in place. There's things I was comfy with drunk or sober when I was younger that just aren't me anymore, you know? I don't have to worry about that now. Any choices I make are going to be sober ones, I don't have to have that inner battle anymore of, "Well, I think I still would have done it sober...I'm pretty sure..." And I won't worry later that they think they "got away with anything" just because they loaded me up with drinks first or, on the other side, that I only said no because I was drunk!

[Hanna]

Lil bit

So glad all went well last night! Skating is so beautiful (well, not when I do it Lol)

I actually slept more than 10 hours last night. Wow, I needed that! Taking it easy today. Gym, now just relaxing with an iced tea. Delicious.
Don't know where my future is heading, but just remembering to breathe, try to rest, don't drink, and that is all I can do.
Hope you are all enjoying what is left of the weekend

[Byrdlady]

Hypernova, Congrts on your 5 days!!! That is massive! Xo, B

[Hanna]

It's 7:45 pm and I am ready for bed. Wow. Night nesters

[Lavande]

Good evening Nesters,

Had a nice day, nothing special just nice & no snow.
LavBlue, if it snows in mid-May I swear I will pull out every last feather, ha ha!!!!

Hypernova, great on your 5 AF days - very nice

Hanna, I sometimes wish I could go to bed that early but I would be up at 2 or 3 am & would not be a happy camper. Guess I just have to persevere until 11 pm, Lol.

Wishing everyone a safe & comfy night in the nest!

Lav

[ADP]

Hi Nesters,
Well, I made day 23 and was heading for day 24 when, (as happens at the weekend) the locals started the usual noseiness and not leaving us alone and for some reason I reached for a bottle. It is always what other people do that pushes me the hardest. OH SH!* !!!!!!
Can't say I had lots though but still, the AL voice won yesterday........

So here goes day one again. It does mean that I have a 23 day run to beat this time and actually feel prepared more for it than last time. I know it is possible and that I can do it but having protected my AF weeks seems such a waste of energy now. Oh well, back on board for a bumpy ride.
ADP xx

[Overit-still]

Hello all, on my phone so short and sweet.

Did I miss Dutch checking in?

ADP, just get back up in the nest babe, G has the Velcro.

Nice job LilBit. Hanna, stay strong and sober.

Off to my twig, see you in the AM although you won't see me with the bag and all.

Sparkling Water is yummy! So far, just plain.

[LilBit]

Overit, aren't you coming up on a big milestone? I won't jinx it by saying it, but it rhymes with snerty snays.

[LavenderBlue]

Quick before I sleep - I spoke too soon. It started snowing right after I posted earlier; stopped for most of the day...and then started again this evening. It looks like a good 5 inches out there so far? Still going, too! I'm hoping most of it melts off again but it's going to be a snowy morning, bleagh!

[Dutch1988]

Just checking in real fast, you didn't miss me overit haha

Made it through the comedy show. I don't think I enjoyed it as much as I normally would it's probably just because I was really tired and the constant barrage of alcohol all around me was a bit distracting. I definitely am more goal oriented and busting my ass on my own personal development, but when I think about sittig back and relaxing I still picture myself with a drink in my hand. Oh well, probably going to sleep.

woek is really on my mind, I need to get another 30 members if I have any chance of Kevin my home without my wife working. Guess I'll just keep focused and avoid AL.

[frances]

Happy Monday everyone! tired here but getting my coffee and getting ready for a dental procedure this afternoon. Was filling out a form for it yesterday and checked off 'no' to 'do you smoke?' and was waiting for the 'do you drink alcohol' question so I could say No but it never came?! I was disappointed! I remember that one from other doctors visits and I would always answer yes and then when asked how much I would say a couple of glasses of wine a couple of times a week HAHAHAHAHA! Yeah right!

Hope everyone has a great day. Hang in there ADP glad you jumped right back on! Figure out why you caved and get a plan to get past that when it happens again!

[Lavande]

Good morning Nesters, happy Monday to all!

It's a chilly 25 degrees here at the moment, Brrrr!

My condolences on the snow LavBlue - it's just not right.

ADP, it's helpful to remove yourself from an uncomfortable situation before you automatically return to your default coping method 'reaching for a bottle'. A big part of our success is learning new healthier ways to cope without AL. Go back to the Tool box where you will find lots of great suggestions.

Dutch, glad to hear you made it through your weekend unharmed!
Keep yourself centered, focus on your quit for now which is most important

frances, good luck with your dental appointment this afternoon!

Wishing everyone a good AF Monday!

Lav