Newbies Nest

[Byrdlady]

Over-it, what a day you had yesterday. After I read your 30 day note, I was so happy for you and ready to award a hat, and the very next post was so hard to believe, I just couldn't. I must give you the honor of your award...:guy: You have certainly earned it, and have held YOUR hand out to others as well. I am so proud of you. The news of your mother is heartbreaking. We are good listeners if you want to tell us the situation. There is no good side to all of this, but having some time to prepare is a blessing of sorts. We are all thinking of you.

Daisy, so happy for your Day 3 AND your commitment to staying sober. The bottom of that pit is just an awful place to be, I am happy that you are heading in the right direction with renewed strength. Thinking of you.

Ava, a hot meal and a hot date! Don't get much better than that!

Pav, so glad you are back, we sorely missed you!!!

LavB, sorry about your wrists, my body tells me I can do things and when I go to do them I get no cooperation!

Lav, 6 years tomorrow!!! I thought you were a rock star when you had 2 years when I first got my legs! I think you and JackieClaire are the two longest sober people I know here (in my circle of posting). I am so thrilled to know you and I hope you know how many lives you have helped by your tireless work here. You deserve a big raise!

Last week, I was so jammed up with work and travel I didn't have a proper chance to read back and post, but I did check in every single day. It's important to me to be accountable. I know this place is virtual, but it's very real to me....it has saved my life. At the end of a very long week, I was dog-butt tired and ended up with a flat tire on the way home and had to be towed. Cost me 4 hours on a Friday afternoon. I was aggravated, mad, cranky and could have bitten somebody's head off, but at NO time did I want to turn to AL for relief. On my drive back home, I realized how much I have grown and learned in the last 4 years. It was awesome. Like Kensho says, just keep at it, it will all become second nature!!
Hugs to all, Byrdie

[Overit-still]

:hoopup:Ya byrdie, thank you! Woot woot:balloons:

[LilBit]

Lav - 6 years??

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Yay! I can't wait until tomorrow to congratulate you. That's just awesome. And, thank you for hanging around, sharing your story & wisdom, and keeping us motivated.

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[daisy45]

Thanks everybody. Overit, thinking of you.
Got more meds today and doc wants to see me. I will see if I can get an appointment for Friday. It will be a good day to see how I really am, no alcohol on board.
Still feel a background tension there but much better.
Exercise is out of the questio for now.....maybe slowly build it in next week to help get things back to normal.

[Hypernova]

Daisy, good for you. I think it's more "self-prioritized" than selfish. Your quitting is not hurting anyone in the long run. It's good for you and all those around you.

LilBit, I am happy to read your take on this. Today being Day 8 I was thinking this morning I am going to have to be more selfish to do this and give myself whatever I might need to hang on this time. I am not a naturally selfish person. Quite the opposite ~ I'll do/give things for/to others I would never consider doing for myself. So now I will look to prioritize my life so I may be more compassionate to myself and everyone .
This is a very good perspective to adopt as the selfish mode is not me. Thank you for this LilBit.

[available]

morning nesters

Great post kensho, it is a wonderful feeling to know you wont drink again and realise how much better our life has changed for the better. i remember my drinking days vividly and the times i told myself i would not drink that day only to hit it after work as i deserved it. I have freedom in my life now.

Ahhh Beachy you funny girl! All i can say is he must be a keeper if i cooked him a meal. I just hope he doesnt expect it too often.

Daisy i was my number one priority when i quit, i had to be. i had to not care that i said "no" to others, i had to think of me and i wanted to live. My SIL is thinking of visiting and she asked if it was okay if she does. i asked her why it would not be and she said she did not want to make me drink again. She visited when i first gave up and i just refused to see her as i knew i would drink. Fast forward 15 months and i am secure in .the knowledge that i will not drink but i am the only one that will ever make the decision to drink and its a choice i will not contemplate. I have my support of here and my family if i wobble. Everything is still around when you are secure in your quit to face it sober.

Ahhh Lav, 6 years and what a treasure you are. i hated you when i first came on here lol. how could i ever tolerate my mother, how could i face life af? well you just told me to do it and cut the crap of procrastinating and i finally listened and i am grateful to you and immensely. I wish i was there to give you a hug and thank you personally for what you had done to keep me sober.

Cooking down in Ausland, need to start thinking of rearranging that wardrobe.

[Byrdlady]

Ava, Lav nipped my feathers more than once. I was trying to BS her (and myself) and she saw right thru it. She called me out on ways to improve my path and make things easier on myself, I fought her tooth and nail, thought I knew better! When the time came that I HAD TO GET THIS DONE, I finally listened to her....really listened, and things improved! Imagine that!!
So excited for your 6 year anniversary tomorrow, Lav!!! Thank you for getting this stubborn ole mule sober! I love you, Byrdie

[Lavande]

Good evening Nesters,

Ava & Byrdie - I surely do not know everything but I know a bullsh**er when I hear one HA HA HA!!!! It definitely takes one to know one
I'm so glad you two have done so well & are here everyday helping others see the light!

Daisy, I am glad you are feeling a bit better. You just keep looking after yourself & keep getting better :hug:

Thanks for the chick pics Lil!
They really do give you the stink eye ~ crazy birds!!!!
I'll have to find Stella's pic with the crown on her head & use it for the day tomorrow & maybe my chicken shoes too

Dutch, have you tried Ibuprofin for your back pain - it can really work wonders & no addiction worries.

Overit, glad you are OK.
Hypernova, great on your 8 AF days!

Sending wishes for a safe night in the nest for all. Stay warm, it's still chilly here in Lavland!!!

Lav

[MossRose]

Had to stop by when I read about Lav's anniversary. Six years is so impressive. Thank you, Lav for all you do. MWO wouldn't be the same without out. And if not for you, we wouldn't have Byrdie. You are our angels of MWO. Thank you!!

[Overit-still]

Hello everyone. Had a great fruitful day. Cozy up tonight, I need hugs

[Overit-still]

Hey, just thought I would expound on my comments that I have made as far as not being able to play the scenario out in my mind as to if I drink. What happens when I try and do that is I go right to a vision that I have seen so many times on the show Intervention or shows similar to that. It is me, in a heap, somewhere (I usually imagine me behind a store), alone, scared. I imagine I have black, swollen, sad weepy eyes, bruises on my body, I'm dirty and cold. I'm afraid yet I don't realize anything because I am so out of it. The typical look of a heroine addict strung out. Fortunately, that has never been me but that is the vision that I get every time I "try and go there" Isn't that scary? That's why I say it's just disgusting and repulsive to even think of having a drink. I just can't. I don't know, maybe it's God showing me what I could be if I don't stop. That's my stopping point? Death? There is no difference between me and that person except the next drink.

Anyway, that was a good cheery thought before bed huh?

[Pavati]

Hi, Everyone:

Lil - love those pictures. What a great way to celebrate Lav and The Stella - who have kept us all on the straight and narrow.

Kensho - exactly how I feel. And because I feel so great sober, I get frustrated when I have drinking thoughts. STILL?! WTF? But NoSugar pointed out that they're just that - thoughts. Not cravings, not desires, just thoughts. As I am working on mindfulness these days, I put those thoughts on a cloud and watch them float away. Buh bye.

Hypernova - forgot to say welcome back. I'm glad you're here!

Byrdie - Today I was stressed beyond belief (I can't begin to even describe all of the s#!t that is going on at work), and alcohol didn't even enter my mind. I was exhausted but forced myself into my hiking clothes and worked up a good sweat while listening to the Bubble Hour. Now I feel my body and mind tunes up, and I am ready to face whatever crap they can throw at me at work. What a relief that I don't need alcohol any more. Sober is the new black!

Overit - I know that image well, as I used to sit and drink and watch Intervention, thinking well, I must be ok because I'm nowhere NEAR that bad (glug glug). My image is me in a suffering state as I was my last day of drinking. I can still conjure that horrible feeling so quickly! NEVER will I go back there.

Ava - I need to get your cleaning bug. How is your doggie?

Ok, off to cook dinner. Take care of yourselves, nesters. I agree with Lil - it is self care, not self-ish.

xo
Pav

[Overit-still]

Overit - I know that image well, as I used to sit and drink and watch Intervention, thinking well, I must be ok because I'm nowhere NEAR that bad (glug glug). My image is me in a suffering state as I was my last day of drinking. I can still conjure that horrible feeling so quickly! NEVER will I go back there.

Pav-it's just scary because I see this poor girl, sick and helpless and alone, reach up for me and then she raises her face to look at me, and.......it's me. No bag. I can see her eyes and soiled hair and the emptiness in her/my eyes. brrrr.....gives me goose bumps. I just keep reliving that scene in my head, over and over, daily, reaching up for me and looking at me right in the eyes. No words but at the same time begging for help. And I think, oh, that poor girl is loved SO MUCH by her parents but she is so lost and forgotten and dumped...............

Well, I could just go on and on about this vision that is SO REAL to me.

[LilBit]

Overit, that dark image is a gift. Hang on to it. I always felt there were two selves: the wild weekend party-girl (yeah right, some party, guzzling wine alone until I passed out and woke up with dry, purple lips) and the "Tuesday morning me" which was me after I pulled it together and began to get on with regular life for the rest of the week. I do not miss the "weekend me."

[KENSHO]

Pav I bet sober WILL be the new black some day!

Overit - that's a loaded image. It seems helpful to you - how scary to see what you could become.

Had a situation tonight that I would have NEVER been abler to deal with during my drinking days. I would have become angry and emotional and irrational and helpless. Instead, I listened and stayed calm and offered some perspectives to others that I would have been too far into myself to previously offer. I love how I have so much more perspective and, dare I say maturity? in these situations. A good example of how life isn't all roses when you stop drinking (hence this situation), but my reactions TO IT are so much more effective and helpful.

On another note, how are you celebrating your 6th Lav? Many congrats and thanks to you friend!