Newbies Nest

[aquamarine]

I'd like to join in here to your Newbie's Nest. I so much want to kick this addiction to alcohol once and for all. I just hate myself right now for not having the strength to do it. But- I am going to try again. Thank you for listening.

[mama]

Hello Newbies Nest. I keep saying that I want to quit, but when "wine-time" rolls around, I lose control. I have not gotten past Day 1 in a long time. I do great on day 1, but then I somehow tell myself that I have just one or two. However, I can NEVER stop at 1 or two. I will take any advise you are all kind enough to give me.

[Byrdlady]

Welcome aboard, Aquamarine and Mama! We are so glad you found us!!! In my signature line, please find a link to the Tool Box. It's a treasure trove of tips and coping skills to help you during the first challenging days and weeks. I went over and pulled this out for you!
It all starts by making a PLAN!

What is a Plan?
I heard about this thing called a Plan, and I HAD plans, but I wouldn't call it a PLAN, as such....it was more of a HOPE. A GOAL, even. A PLAN sounded way too formal for this thing I was embarking on...after all, what if I failed? Hope is NOT a strategy. Get yourself a PLAN.

#1 Failure is not an option. When you think you are going to fail, guess what? You FAIL! Wrote this book on this one. Get your mind into a mode of THIS WILL BE DONE. Don't be willy-nilly, or your willy will get nillied. Your mind is your best friend and your biggest enemy. Control IT and you will win. Control your thoughts and you will win.

Get all of the AL out of your house/space. Yes...ALL of it. You don't need a safety net because you are not going to fail. I fought this one hard, but I wasn't able to succeed until I did it. No, I was NOT different than everybody else, I could not resist it if it was in the house. GET IT OUT.

Get your story down as to why you're not drinking. This is important. Get a story together you can live with. I actually have ulcerative colitis, so I say that my UC is 1000 times better if I don't drink. If you are a Type A personality, you might enjoy using 'AL kills my ulcers'. If you are a health nuts, "I'm detoxing"....religious nut? "I gave it up for Lent and felt so good I kept going".....you get the idea. Get your story and stick to it.

As Alkies, we aren't used to eating. This is the SILVER BULLET to succeeding. If you have a bad craving and The Voices are knocking, EAT! Eat until you are FULL! Remember those times when you've said, "I can't eat another bite of anything!" That's the full we're talking about. You will not want anything if you EAT!

You are gonna feel like dookey for a few days. I felt flu-like for the first couple weeks, so treat yourself well. Drink plenty of fluids and rest! Your body is changing over from an ethanol burning engine to a food/nutrient burning machine. Have patience as your body makes this transition.

Keep yourself out of temptation. STAY out of the wine aisle at the grocery store. NO, you are not stronger than this thing, protect your young quit with everything you've got. Stay out of bars and avoid booze parties, especially the first 3 or 4 weeks. I don't care how strong you feel, this is a new thing for us and temptation is everywhere. Avoid it at all costs.

Change your mindset from one of deprivation to one of gratitude. Just look at the folks on here who have made C-changes in their lives!!! They are HAPPY and optimistic! Does this sound like someone who considers themselves deprived? It's all a matter of perspective. Thank God, you don't HAVE to drink today!!! Remember, to a worm, digging around in the hard old ground is a lot more relaxing than going fishing! Try not to throw, attend and participate in Pity Parties, they serve no good purpose.

Glue yourself to this site and learn everything you can about this condition we have. Knowledge is power. Nothing we do or think hasn't been done or thought before, so look back on the 7 years of experience here and you will find out what happens if you do such and such.

Let go of the past... don't look back. Let it go. ALL of it. Forgive yourself and move on....nothing to see here. There is NOTHING we can do to change what we've done, but we can start today and make things better for our future.

Did I mention gluing yourself here? Read and Post!!! This is key! Being part of a group is important. Like so many have said recently, we find that we actually don't have a much of a life outside the bottle! So learning to trust others again is part of our emotional growth and healing. Yes, the Nest does move fast, but we are always on point. You just regained about 4-6 hours a day back, so spending 30 minutes catching up here should be no problem. Staying connected here is a real key to STAYING sober. The world out there is telling us to do something totally counter to what we know we must do. Staying connected with like-minded people is vital. We are swimming upstream on this one...it's nice to have fellow fish to make the journey with us.

I feared someone giving me a drink by mistake....if they ever do, I'm spitting it back in the glass. My quit is my foundation. No one can take it from me.

That's my take on The Plan. Byrdie

[mama]

Byrdlady - THANK YOU very much. I am going to print this.

[Matt M.]

Welcome Mama and aquamarine.
Hope to see you guys around for the long haul!
Not much else to say, the Byrd lady had spoken!
What a great post Byrd! Thank you!

(Except for the part were my Willie is going to get Nillied :shocked that's some serious shit there.

Stay Hard brothers and sisters!

[available]

Morning nesters

Welcome Aqua and Mama, stick like glue to here, post like a lunatic when an urge hits and eat a house if need be, be gentle on yourself and definitely get all al out of the house. We do not need temptation by having it around. One day at a time is all we can do in giving up al but it is so worth it in the end.

Thank you all for your wishes, i suppose we always have hope in situations like this but to be told you are riddled with cancer, is just devastating. Robert and i have talked a lot about death this week and his plans, maybe he already knew but now we just need to soldier on. As he said yesterday, he was diagnosed with HIV 28 years ago and seen so many friends lost their lives and he has had those extra years and he is grateful. When i told him i was upset he apologised for making me sad. He has a belated 50th birthday party on Saturday and will tell no one until afterwards, not even his boyfriend (who is a total arse) so its just me that knows. I will be pulling out every bit of strength i have this weekend but i know i wont drink, i dont need to turn into a blithering idiot and thank god there are no urges and my daughter is coming for support. i now have to accept this situation which i suppose i have done in my heart but i now just want to cry a lot.

Hanna keep plodding along, that is all you can do. day by day, minute by minute, life has a funny way of sorting itself out.

One week today till Thailand, still no packing, mum here on Wednesday, where has the time gone.

Have a great one!

[daisy45]

Which episode is it? I had to stop listening to some of them. It's probably me, but if someone says you are going to feel like this and that for up to two years I'll tend to experience those feeling and such instead of just going with what comes naturally. I am looking for symptoms I don't have? Does that make sense?

20 March, meeting with Kirstin S. Not sure of episode number. I just flick through and pick a title that connects with me.
These are very positive. There may be talk of how hard it is at times but overall I find it encourages me. You can hear and feel the energy from these people and how it is so worth it.
Piper I have heard people talking about these but now I know. I am using this as a must as well as coming here.
Got my I-phone tonight. Only £50 second-hand. Cracked back but working. Going to get it set up tomorrow so I can walk and listen to bubble hour and have instant access to here.
Went for a lovely walk by the river tonight...most exercise I've had in 6 weeks. Slowly but surely getting back to normal.
In a way I am grateful for everything that happened. I have learnt a massive lesson. Saying no and looking after my physical and mental health has to be priority. Everything I have inside me is going into the new life I have ahead of me.
I am sober now and forever. Watch this space!

[Londoner]

Tequila by yourself is a problem. Officially.

[LilBit]

Welcome, Aqua and Mama!

BLady, what an epic post!! That one says it all.

Londoner, are you experiencing the tequila alone problem or just making an observation? If it's the former, put the glass down. Walk around the block. Think of the hangover -- tequila is the WORST!

Lav, fortunately, I have a hi-tech hip. I jokingly boast that I have a $90,000 _ss. It's sure holding up well to the abuse as are you with all the young 'uns around.

Stay positive everyone and stick close to the nest. I was walking through a store today; passed by the wine section and said to myself, "I am free of this!" Whatever you must have enslaves you in some way. Freedom is delicious.

[daisy45]

Tequila by yourself is a problem. Officially.

Londoner, if you take nothing else away from your present experience, let it be how utterly crap you feel; then look back to when drink was out of your life. Weigh it up and make that decision....for you! Get your life back! I am back with a vengence and would love you to join me.
You deserve better.....

[Lavande]

Good evening Nesters,

Looks like a lot going on in the nest today

Hello & welcome Aquamarine & Mama!
Glad you both found is & decided to settle in for a while. Kicking AL out of my life has made all the difference for me. Life is not in any way perfect but it is much easier to manage with a clear head & heart. I wish you both the very best!

Daisy, have fun with your new phone - nice treat to yourself. You can buy a protective cover for it, I have a few to change out when I feel like a change.

Ava, we are all thinking about you & Robert, I hope you know that :hug:

Lil, glad you got the top of the line hip, ha ha!!

Londoner, please let us know you are OK.

I had a nice enough, not overly busy kind of day today - nice!
Wishing everyone a safe & comfy night in the nest.

Lav

[MossRose]

Ava - so sorry to hear about Robert. Cancer sucks. Not much more to say, so sending all my love. You are a good friend. And a very nice person.

Welcome Aquamarine & Mama. MWO is a great place to be. Hope you stay for a while. I won't go into my back story, but the people here saved my live. I will be forever grateful. Stay with us, stay strong, and watch your life transform. It will happen.

Londoner, I love you, but we've been here before. Are you ready to make the commitment? Let's do this. Why not just put it behind you now. AL is obviously robbing you of peace. So just take one really huge deep breath, and we're off. I know how hard it is. I was the hard case, remember? Had to lose everything first. So I hit bottom, and knew there had to be a better way. I think you know that already. Let's get you to a safe place. Not being mean. Just being honest. You won't quit until you really, really want to. So, are we going to do this? Please say yes, because I will stand by you every step of the way. But you have to want this badly. I want it badly for you. Even if you're are not ready, I'll still stand by you, but I hope you choose the better path.

xx, Moss

[available]

I second MR London, when you totally accept you are done with al can you go forward. That was the hardest part of "getting" to me. I had to be done, totally and utterly, no false promises to myself that i can drink in the future or have one when i went out or give up and after such and such a time, or just have one as i am okay. I will never be okay with al, i am an alcoholic, it is who i am and i am okay with that.

Any alcohol is bad, it will eventually kill us, we are addicts and we will fight this everyday of our lives but it gets easier each and every day we are sober. For us on MWO, we have all battled like you and for all of us some days are better than others and we all dont want al to win.

[Overit-still]

Night Night all

[Hanna]

Night all. Hoping for a restful night.