Newbies Nest

[Matt M.]

Mama~ It is mentioned in here often, but I'm not sure if you have heard it or not. Something that has helped me immensely and assisted in keeping me sober for the last 8 months.

The next time you are circling a drink stop and in your mind play it out for the next 24~48 hours. Imagine it as precise as possible leaving out no detail. I rarely make it past the first 8 hours before I'm disgusted.
Anyway just thought I throw that out there.
Remain Solid my friends, and whatever you do don't take the first drink! Before reaching out first.

[KENSHO]

Sitting overlooking the ocean at night. Very calm. The ocean air is bathing and refreshing. First quiet time in several days. It's been a whirlwind and I look forward to sharing some insights when I return and have a keyboard. I have had a few romanticized vacation moments, but, like Matt said, playing it through brings me right back to the very real relationship I had with alcohol and I become instantly disinterested. I have been really thankful to have had my wits and the ability to fully enjoy this time with my family.

[Pavati]

Hi, All:

When I was in college we were up for a late night study session, and I took my roommate's car out to get us all some more diet coke. I was fiddling with the radio and crashed into a parked car - 2am. No alcohol involved. I couldn't believe it - it felt like a dream. I squeezed my eyes shut, pinched my arm, hoped, wished and begged for that to not have happened. Guess what - I opened my eyes and I was still there, crashed into a bumper at 2am in my friend's car.

I tell that story, because that is how I have come to accept that I can't drink. I couldn't believe this was me - I am smart and in control. How could I POSSIBLY be an alcoholic. That happened to other people. Guess what. I squeezed my eyes shut, pinched my arm, hoped, wished and begged for that not to have happened. But it did. The only thing left to do was for me to accept it. Once I did that - once the choice was OFF the table - everything became easier. I might have an inkling that I could have a drink (my husband drinks and we have plenty in the house at all times), but pinch myself hard as I might, I still had to come to the same conclusion - I can't drink. That happened often enough, and now the rare times I get an inkling to drink, I come to a different conclusion - I DON'T drink. Thank goodness! I tell this long story because that acceptance was the thing for me. I pushed, struggled and hoped it wasn't so - what a relief to stop that fight.

Congratulations, Daisy! Your last first week.

Sorry you drank, Mama. Dust off your plan and make adjustments where necessary.

Hope the rest of you newbies hold tight. Happy Sober Saturday.

Pav

[Dutch1988]

I made it through today, end of my 5th week no AL. Realized a lot reading people's advice and really am grateful for this network. Definitely the closest I have been to giving up on my quit so the feedback was excellent. I finally figured out I could read your comments and add a note on my phone so I can actually remember to respond to everyone, so that's cool since I'm always posting from my phone. This week I made it through a whole spring break camp and regular work without drinking, never imagined I could do that, I would consider it worse than a wedding, haha. Played with my daughter for hours today, had a date night with my wife at our favorite restaurant minus my usual AL drink, and going to watch a movie to cuddling with the wifey. I have a plan for my a hole contractor and for making more money, so things are looking up. Just need to utilize everyone's advice and keep going, ain't no getting off this train. Again thanks everyone for the feedback and support.

Overit-right now, my contractor bathroom situation, my older brother alienating my whole family because my older sister apparently upset his wife, parents health, I mean the list goes on. Really it just seems like an extreme amount of anger for things that should be upsetting but not Blood pressure rising like this. I definitely am past staying active to avoid drinking, I can come home and relax now...just haven't quite figured out how to. Today helped for sure.

Moss-I'm taking your advice, I have been drinking waaaay too much coffee with extra work this week and that did not help. I have a supplement I know is good for stress so I will try it, called baldrian, dunno if anyone has tried it but it has helped before.

Goes resolve, that sounds like a life changing situation, I couldn't definitely see wanting to drink, way to stay strong though!

Lav I have tried hypnosis in the past, not the CDs from here, but people make it sound like they are worth it so maybe I will. Mindfulness Meditation has always been my thing, Jon Kabat zin and his body scan is my bread and butter relaxation tape. I will check out the CDs and at least read them, supplements that are good recommendations you guys let me know.

Daisy that is a nightmare, it sounds like my family, just a bit dysfunctional haha. Have you ever watched comedian Christopher Titus? Highly recommend to people with screwed up family backgrounds for a laugh!

Pavati I think your right about exercise, although I've been liftin at the gym at night I usually get my cardio from grappling which is my endorphins rush for the day, killing the stress. Next week I can at least go back to normal but next camp I will remember to add in some cardio time, even if it's jumping rope. I will check out the serenity prayer, I wish I was religious but never been able to really believe and have faith in a higher power like that, I'm sure it would help.

[daisy45]

Gonna google Christopher Titus today Dutch.....could do with a laugh.
Last day of my Easter break....kids back tomorrow. So gonna make the most of it.
This has been a good week....feel better than I have in 6 weeks. Between the stress and the alcohol, my body and mind had taken a battering.
To take care of myself I need to keep both these factors out of my life.

[Lavande]

Good morning Nesters,

A sunny Sunday it is
More outside work for me today then dinner via the grill for my son & his family. It's nice to see the grandkids running around outside instead of terrorizing my house, ha ha!

I am grateful for every sober moment in my life, I hope all of you are too!
Wishing everyone a wonderful AF Sunday.

Lav

[abcowboy]

LavenderBlue on your 8 month milestone!

[LilBit]

Hello Nesters!

Today's a travel day. I guess if you're looking for a fun AF trip, then an athletic competition in Salt Lake City is the ticket. They have some interesting gardens, hikes and an aviary with birds of prey...places I never got to see on my last visit because I was spending all my time after competition hours doing you-know-what. This time though, I'm doing full-on springtime in the Alps, Julie Andrews-style nature appreciation.

Lav, I'm glad you treated yourself to a new shop vac. That sounds like quite the necessity in your hen-tiful corner of the world.

Daisy, a belated woot! woot! for your 7 days. Good for you. Enjoy the relative quiet while it lasts.

Dutch, yay for pressing through a difficult time and hitting a successful 5 weeks. I had to look up "grappling" because I thought it was something one spread on toast. Must be very physically demanding.

Pav, that's a great and awful story. I'm glad you weren't drinking when you hit the car @ 2 am. No DUI, only a face palm.

Kensho, 'trying to absorb some of your ocean breezes. Ahhh...your vacay sounds so nice & relaxing.

Matt -- good advice on playing out where the "one drink" lands you in the next 8-24 hours. As you said, not pretty.

Cuckoos, welcome to the nest. Quite by accident, we seem to follow a lot of bird themes, here: Lav's Stella, Byrdlady and of course, my own avatar to name a few. You fit right in.

Hanna, good for you for hanging in there. Matters of the heart are the toughest. But it sounds like you're taking some healthy steps to support yourself emotionally. Glad to see it. Who knows how things will turn out? Hoping the best for you.

G Man, you're on a calm farm. You must not have any Stellas running around there.

Available, you must be thrilled with the Thailand trip almost upon you. The balloon ride will be so worth it, and will give you something to look forward to. Don't miss the part where they blow the balloon up, especially if it's in the morning sun. Soo beautiful.

Mama, good for you for coming back. Read my signature line. I can't tell you how many times I "fell down."

Over-it, always good to see your smiling face. Wait --what?

Love to all!

[LilBit]

LavB, congrats on your 8 months. WOW!

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[aquamarine]

Congratulations Daisy on 7days, Dutch on 5 weeks and LavB on 8 months. Wonderful accomplishments! On Day 4 and hasn't been crazy hard yet. But I know the worst is coming. It always does. I need to anticipate the triggers before they come and then I just throw in the towel. I feel like just about anything is a trigger thought. Feeling good is a trigger, feeling bad is a trigger, coming off a stressful work stress is a trigger, it goes on and and on. I guess you just have to stay vigilant and stay very self aware. Matt what you said about thinking about where the next drink will land you is completely spot on. I try to do this. It never ever ends in a good place. And it only makes me feel good for a really short amount of time . The rest of the time is thinking about wanting more, stressing about my husband finding out, hiding wine bottles etc.. It is so consistent and never changes.

[Byrdlady]

Goot Mornink! (That's German)

What interesting stories in the last 24 hours! Resolve, I live at the beach and those rip currents scare me to death. Every time I hear a siren or a helicopter overhead looking for a swimmer, my heart aches. I am so glad yours had a happy ending. Life really CAN change in the blink of an eye.

Matt, to take your 'Romancing Being Stoned' one step further, when ever I find myself longing for a normal relationship with AL or just having ONE, I B*tch-Slap myself and say "Girl, that's not the way you drank". In fact, I havent drank that way in probably 30 years....the way I drank was sneaking gulps from a hidden bottle in my closet. OR chugging it out of a hairspray bottle in the lady's room of a restaurant or airport. Nothing sexy about that picture. Usually yanks me right back down to earth. You can use MY visual if you need to!! It does the trick!

Lav Blue, 8 months is spectacular! Well done on you!!! Thank you for staying in the nest and helping others find the way! So proud of you! Keep it going!!
:horse:
Narilly, (whose name I misspell no matter what I do) but whose signature line is among the best I've seen....'You can have the life you want, or you can drink'. That one says it all! Well done on ONE YEAR!!!! You must be so proud!!! We sure are! GREAT job!!!
:welldone:
Hope everyone has an easy day!!! Hugs, Byrdie

[narilly]

Thank you Byrdie!
If I can do it, anyone can. This is the longest I have been sober since I was 13, which was 37 years ago.
Thank you to all you MWOers, you have helped me so much! We can do this together right?

I joind MWO in 2006 and it took this long for me to get my year. It has been one of the best years of my life. Waking up Un Hung everyday is a gift.

Stay sober today everyone!
Happy Sunday

[Byrdlady]

Narilly, I forget to ask for a speech!!!!! PP

[Londoner]

Fed up. It's all a laugh until reality kicks in.

[Elvis]

Good job on one year Narilly!