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    I'm sorry Dutch, that's heartbreaking
    I have too much shit to do today and tomorrow to drink:sohappy:

    I'm taking care of the "tomorrow me":thumbsup:
    Drinkin won't help a damn thing! Will only make me sick for DAYS and that ugly, spacey dumb feeling-no thanks!

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      Dutch, I'm so sorry. That's just awful, and no one can blame you for feeling low. BUT, there is no "perfect reason to drink!!" It doesn't help. It doesn't even make you feel better. Please don't fall for it.
      "If you fell down yesterday, get up today." -- H.G. Wells

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        Dutch, LilBit is right, what happened is tragic, and I am so sorry. This is where the rubber hits the road and real coping skills are needed, not the FALSE coping skill of getting drunk. AL will not improve this situation and in fact will make a bad situation WORSE. Feel this, Dutch, as badly as it hurts, work your way thru it and process it, I promise, tomorrow you will he so glad you did. Drinking AT situations only hurts US! I am praying for your strength. Stay strong for your family. They need YOU. You need YOU. Byrdie.
        All you gotta do, is get thru this day. AF 1/20/2011
        Tool Box
        Newbie's Nest

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          Quick post again today. Work was better today - I really hate that first day, "I don't know anything about what I'm doing" feeling. I still have a lot to learn, but at least there's some things I'm comfortable with.

          In case it helps anyone, I do definitely have cravings after work and on my way home - I kind of figured I would when I started working again since it was my "reward" after work for so many years. I've been bringing an extra snack to work so if it's really bad, I can eat that in my car before I even drive home. I've also made sure to have either a meal planned so I can focus on that or even just focusing on how good a cup of tea will taste. And usually by the time I've eaten or had my tea, the craving has passed. The trick really seems to be distracting myself long enough for the craving to pass. I'm positive others have said that before, but never hurts to hear things again!

          Oh no, I crossposted there - I'm so sorry to hear that Dutch!
          I am stubborn as a pig - but changing what I'm being stubborn about!

          Cigarette Free On: 9/23/2014
          AF on: 8/12/2014

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            Morning nest

            Cold, wet and miserable here, a perfect day for work.

            Im so sorry Dutch about the miscarriage and as Byrd stated drinking will accomplish nothing. Be there and present for your wife, she will so appreciate your love and support during this time and also you being sober. You are a strong person and yes stress does make us want to drink but drinking will solve absolutely nothing. It will make nothing better, the outcome will still be the same. Take care of your little family.

            Nothing much to report here, at work, having a coffee and a bit of downtime, i have so much work to do, i dont know where to start so i am having a coffee, that will fix everything.

            I entered a competition where i work and of course i am lucky in absolutely nothing and suprise suprise i won, along with 29 other people. Just what i dont really want though, a gym membership, personal trainer and a nutritionist! I am sure i will appreciate it once i get motivated. I still have a problem with eating now i dont drink so the nutritionist will be stunned when seeing i live on coffee and chocolate. I am looking forward to hopefully getting my diet back into whack. ten years of eating grapes as my main supplement obviously has not done me any favours!

            Any news Lil and Pav? Thinking of you both

            Take care
            AF free 1st December 2013 - 1st December 2022 - 9 years of freedom

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              Dutch, Lil and Byrd are right. There will always be a reason and loss of a life is the hardest. I know nothing will help with how you feel right now but you are not alone in your loss. It will feel worse in the long run if you give in to AL. Tell yourself if you still feel the same way in 2 days then at least you have thought about it before indulging on impulse. Like they say, 1 day at a time, then the next one then you decide. So sorry for your loss.
              KAREN

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                I'm so sorry, Dutch.
                You had the power all along, my dear.

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                  Good evening Nesters,

                  Very sorry for your loss Dutch. Please just take care of yourselves, we are all thinking of you :hug:

                  I had a good day, got lots of little things done. I'm going to be away for a few days, going on a little R&R with my girls. We did this last year & had a lot of fun hitting the beach just before Memorial day. The beach is always better when there's no crowds

                  Action girl, stay close to the nest, keep your plan handy & this time next Monday things will be looking a lot netter for you!

                  Wishing everyone a safe night in the nest!

                  Lav
                  AF since 03/26/09
                  NF since 05/19/09
                  Success comes one day at a time :thumbs:

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                    Guys, I just got a call from the surgeon and it's good news!! https://www.mywayout.org/community/sh...=1#post1613458
                    "If you fell down yesterday, get up today." -- H.G. Wells

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                      Drinking never made anything better for me. Anything bad it made worse, and anything good was turned into a regret. Hang in there Dutch. Sounds like your wife needs you present for her during this time.

                      Ava I'm still laughing about the grape supplement diet.
                      No matter how far you go or how fast you run, you can't get away from yourself. ....said at an AA meeting. It stuck with me.

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                        Hi, Nest:

                        HOORAY, Lil B! Congratulations!

                        Our news is bad - it will be Mr. P vs the Big C in our house. I am numb and still processing. We don't know anything else other than BAD. We are now off to specialist HMO hell.

                        There is one thing for certain - I will not drink. I know that I will need all of my strength, courage and clarity to deal with whatever comes next. Here's hoping we get that news like Lil C - your post gives me great hope!

                        Dutch - join me in processing grief without the false crutch of alcohol - it will only make things worse.

                        xo
                        Pav

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                          Lots of tough situations going on for folks here - my prayers and wishes for strength are going out for everyone - glad you are here and staying clear and present through tough times!

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                            A roller coaster of emotions with each post.
                            Dutch, my heart aches for you and your loss.
                            LilBit, I am THRILLED to hear your great news!
                            kHerriot, I owe you a hat for your 30 days! :guy: Congratulations!
                            Pav, wishing you strength in the coming days and weeks. My hubs had prostate cancer when I hit the 6 month AF mark. It was like watching my life thru someone else's eyes...surreal. Cancer is NOT like it used to be, it can be managed! so hang in there!!

                            Thinking of you all as we face life together....sober. Byrdie
                            All you gotta do, is get thru this day. AF 1/20/2011
                            Tool Box
                            Newbie's Nest

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                              AG - I am also back to Day 1 AGAIN!!! We can do this.

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                                Pav and Dutch, in the midst of my joy, half of my heart is with you and breaks for you. Above all, I am glad to see you both here. "Here" doesn't have all the answers, nor does it fix the things that are wrong but it does provide a path through the wilderness that will lead us to a good place. Sending you my very best hopes, wishes and strength.
                                "If you fell down yesterday, get up today." -- H.G. Wells

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