Newbies Nest

[Turnagain]

Feel better baby, Byrdie!

[kherriot]

Thank you so much for your reply. I am sure we are not alone. I know my sister who does smoke and is addicted to AL has told me that every time she is in rehab they tell her that it is just one addiction for another. Does not stop her but then there is nothing I can do either. I just have to be strong. I would never turn to another substance to replace AL. Thanks Tur, I see I am not alone.

[Lavande]

Good evening Nesters,

Just back from a nice day out with the family

Byrdie, feel better soon!
Let me know if you need Nurse Stella - I'll pack her bag & put her on the bus. She'll keep you so distracted you'll forget all about the virus!!!

Hi there Turn, LavB, Pav & Pauly.
It's true that we have to learn to do everything completely 100% sober. But once you do, it becomes the new norm, promise! We can be fully present for our kids when they need a little help & that is something to be grateful form believe me

Wishing everyone a safe & comfy night in the nest!

Lav

[Lavande]

Rise & shine Nesters!
Happy Monday morning to all

Wishing everyone a great AF day!

Lav

[Byrdlady]

Thank you for the good wishes, they worked! Feeling human again! Man, I gotta tell you, this bug was BAD! It started out with a raging sore throat, then it went into my head and made my whole face hurt, even my teeth! I could feel my pulse in my gums! (what's up with THAT?) Anyway, this morning, I am doing better, I only feel half dead! BAH!

Turn, great to see you! I have often said to myself that the only way I'd take a drink now is if I were drunk. I think that pot falls under this umbrella, too....because it is another substance that removes our inhibitions. As an addict, I'm just going to steer clear of anything that would jeopardize my quit.

Hope everyone has a wonderful day...Byrdie

[Overit-still]

Good morning! Love being sober. Why do I forget how good it feels? and how crappy drinking makes me feel?

I'm obviously an addict. Food, drink, and exercise, etc. So I am careful to try and not add more to my list of plenty

Have a glorious day everyone! God Bless!

[melissah]

Day 1...waiting for the herbal supplement Kudzu. Did not drink two days ago and felt great the next day. Convinced myself one more day would not hurt until I got the "magic" supplement. Wanting the madness to end.

[NoSugar]

Welcome, Melissa!

I'm not sure Kudzu is magic but I hope it works for you! Maybe someone here has tried it and will chime in.

It can be part of an overall plan to quit drinking but on its own, I doubt that it will be enough (or addiction would be a thing of the past because all of us with the problem would be taking it!).

Maybe you could share your plan here and get some feedback - this is a group that is likely to be able to spot any loopholes! We all tricked ourselves more times than we really want to remember.

The great thing is, the madness (and that is a very accurate description!) really can end the moment you are ready to do whatever it takes not to drink.

Please feel free to ask questions and tell us about you, if that would help.

All the best, NS

[Hanna]

Hi all

Byrd...sorry you got sick but glad you had a nice vacation.

I am visiting with my sister in Pennsylvania. It was a really good idea for me to make this trip. Although she is working during the week I am able to get her support and get away a little bit. I am beginning to wrap my head around the fact that my marriage really is ending. It's been about 2 1/2 months of emotional hell but I am feeling like I can start to turn a corner, and begin to figure out my life. I am still going to meetings every day but have to admit that I caved two nights ago and drank some wine. Honestly, it was stupid, but I just felt like I needed a temporary reprieve from my life. Of course, it did not help at all. However, after one night I am back and committed to staying away from alcohol.

Anyway, just wanted to check in. Will try to post and read as much as possible while away. Hope you are all having a good day

[Dutch1988]

Melissa-Kudzu was a great starting point for me, if nothing else it acted as a placebo to get me to try not drinking for a few nights, it also definitely got me through the bit of withdrawal I felt for the first few nights.

Hanna-At least you are being honest with yourself. I have to admit drinking has crossed my mind more than once the past few weeks. I am probably struggling more now with not drinking than ever before, and I don't enjoy it. At least you jumped back on the bandwagon!

This place continues to be a place to vent and get support, I know I would not be this far without this place. Saturday I got into an argument with my brother, He was saying that there were a lot of positive things about drinking, and I agreed, but didn't think they applied to me. I was speaking about feeling good about my progress and it's rare for someone who drank as much as i did to stop without needing a bottom to hit. He commented that I have always seemed to stop for a month or limit my drinking when it became out of hand. I said that just made me more rare, and he stormed off saying he didn't want to argue the positive benefits of alcohol with me. I got him to come back and finish talking to me, but didn't think that not drinking would actually cause an conflict with someone in my family.

After that fun conversation I went to my parents after work, my mom asked me how my stomach had been since it's been bothering me quite a bit since the miscarriage, I said it was still bothering me but had been better. My dad overheard and asked why my stomach hurt. After I said it had been bothering me since the miscarriage happened he began telling me how I needed to get over it and that the spirit of my child would come back the next time we tried and blah blah blah, all spiritual bullshit I didn't ask for nor need at the moment. I yelled at him saying I could just drink to deal with my emotional problems like everyone else in my family. He responded saying he hoped I felt better and that anger was a stage in grief I needed to go through, I had to say I have other things to go through and am plenty familiar with the stages of grief, all I have been trying to do since this happened is read/learn coping skills since I can't drown my emotions into a bottle or a bowl. Overall a pretty shitty Saturday, but Sunday was great at a Street Fair with my wife and daughter.

I also learned that when my mind continues to dwell on past mistakes, i should write down what I learned from the experience and move on. The sooner I pick out something to learn the easier it is to stop thinking about it. For instance, don't hangout at your parent's house when dad is going through withdrawal from pain pills unless you are in a very supportive mood!

I love coming on here and bitching every day, I have to say, it is so much better than keeping it bottled up inside. I can tell a few people a conversation like that, but no one my age really understands except my sister who has been through miscarriages, everyone else my age doesn't even have a kid yet, so it's hard to find an outlet. Well, it's off to put the kid down for a nap, happy Monday all!

[available]

Morning nesters

A long weekend done and dusted and a productive one also.

Welcome Melissah. i have no idea about Kudzo but i know when i wanted to stop drinking that i looked at all options to help me. I did find being gentle on myself and eating and sleeping what and when i wanted helped enormously, watching doco's on alcoholism and reading and posting on here were a godsend.

Dutch, i would love to know the positives of drinking for an alcoholic! I cant think of one damn positive that al gave me. Why does your brother feel he should be so negative about your drinking when it is such a positive in your life. You are doing this when so many others dont or cant. Dont ever let anyone shit on your parade! If you are feeling wobbly maybe some time out from each other is needed. I know i keep way away from toxic people who tell me its okay to drink. For me its not okay, it never will be okay. I also found the further i got along i had the "what nows" with al. I seemed to be accomplishing what i never thought i could achieve and this is when i finally accepted that there was no going back, this is my life now and i had to grow in other areas of my life to fulfil it. I remember the anger i felt also, could have happily poked peoples eyeballs out with hot coals, that passes thank god.

I cleaned and rearranged my bedroom, a bit of past closing by doing that and it feels good. Bedside tables sanded and stained, walls washed and a feeling of achievement. I would never have undertaken this when i drank. There are so many things i would never have done in the past year and a half if i had drank.

Hanna hang in there, glad you are open and honest. Lying leads us to where we dont want to be, i found i had to be honest with myself and on here. I hope you have some much needed YOU time with your sister, lean on her and take her help, you deserve it.

off to work i go. blah.

take care everyone.

[Guitarista]

Morning nesters

A long weekend done and dusted and a productive one also.





I cleaned and rearranged my bedroom, a bit of past closing by doing that and it feels good. Bedside tables sanded and stained, walls washed and a feeling of achievement. I would never have undertaken this when i drank. There are so many things i would never have done in the past year and a half if i had drank.

Hey Nester's!

Good onya Dutch. Great to read your posts. Welcome Melissa!

Ava, sanding, cleaning, re-arranging a house.....all forms of mindfulness and great to find a little project when getting sober. When you said 'sanding' I just got re-motivated to polish up, clean and sand some surface rust/residue of the chrome on my old bike out the back. She's a beauty and runs, but been off the road for far too long. Thanks!

A safe, sober and magical week to everyone. G

[Matt M.]

Checking in, Alive and Well.
Welcome New folks and welcome back to some. ..Hope to read back and get caught up up...
Stay Hard my friends

[melissah]

I hear you and appreciate your honestly... wouldn't we all like a little magic? Well, time to grow up. I heard a phrase in a show I am fond of and it goes like this "time to kill the little girl". This spoke to me, time to quit being a victim and grow up. or else, right?

[little beagle]

G my hubby took me for a bike ride and breakfast Sunday morning. It's starting to get hot here, but we got the ride in before the worst of the heat. It's a wonderful, free feeling.