Newbies Nest

[Rahulthesweet]

Hey Narilly,

I have an onward flight from Calgary today. ... great o hear from you !! I love this place ... absolutely amazing. We drove to Iceland park ways and luckily weather was clear. Also went to Yoho National park at lake emerald ! stunning !!

[lifechange]

Good Monday, Nesters..

Ava, thinking of you and Robert. Big hugs to you.

All this talk of Canada makes me want to visit.. such beautiful country. My dad sent me some pictures of our old house and scenery in Ketchikan, Alaska, and I had such a longing to be there again.

After a few very tough days, I feel better today. Teary, as my eldest daughter just left for a week long class trip, and because we had to run for the train we didn't take the time for a proper hug. And I wasn't very pleasant this weekend.. but I'm sure everything will be fine and then we'll see eachtother and I'll have a chance to do it right. I know from past periods of sobriety that EVERYTHING improves with my relationships, especially communication, when I don't drink. I'm trying to stay positive and focus on the progress I'm making instead of the mistakes I've made.
Last night I went to a concert with my partner and some friends. I knew for a fact I wouldn't drink-- and I wouldn't have even gone if it hadn't been planned since his birthday in April--but everyone else drank a f*** of a lot and there was so much weed.. it wasn't such a fun time for me and I won't go to any other such concerts for a long while. I felt a bit sad for those drunken concert times gone by, but I honestly didn't in any way have illusions that I might be able /want to do it again. I just tried to think of other ways I'd rather spend time with friends. In a healthy way. I tried to think of all the people who cherish and respect their bodies, give thanks for all they are able to do and experience, who wouldn't dream of pouring poison inside.
I wish I could be brainwashed.. an easy brain wash. Fall asleep at night and wake up the next morning with a new way of thinking about alcohol. I know I can brainwash myself. With some more time, positive thinking, patience, relentless determination.
I took the day off of work to spend some time with myself and you all and it's good.

Pav, sounds like the weekend with your husband was just what the doctor ordered.. Good for you for giving up the control and just enjoying yourself. I love it when I'm able to do that..

Hi Mischa..some great responses to the concerns you posted about.. thanks for that. I got a lot out of reminders from them, too.

Wishing you all a lovely day..
xx

[Guitarista]

Hi Nesters near and not so far,

Good to see you LC. Good job taking the day off work for some self lovin'. G :happy2:

[available]

LC keep doing what you are doing, with time brings peace. I realised there is no end to this journey of being sober and taking each day as it comes is all we can do. We have bad days and good days and compared to my drinking days, everyday is a good day really. Protect your quit with your life girl, you are doing this for you and a better life and believe me, it is so much better.

Robert survived his 6 hour surgery. It has been a very emotional few days and tomorrow will be another but he is alive and now we can look to the future for however long it is. He is an inspiration and i tell him of all your thoughts and well wishes. He is one of my greatest supporters also in my sobriety, we get to support each other for a bit longer yet thank goodness.

I'm off to sleep, another aspect of being sober i now appreciate to the max!

[Lavande]

Good Monday morning Nesters,

Ava, that's great news. I'm happy for you & Robert!

LC, you can go to bed & be brainwashed waking up thinking differently about AL. I did it with the MWO Hypno CDs. Look into them or something similar, why not?
There comes a time in everyone's life to give up the habits of our youth. Concerts, crazy drinking, weed, etc. All that has to stop at some point, right? We want to be good examples for our kids & it's especially important when you have a job where you can be drug randomly tested. At this point I am more concerned about preserving my health

Greetings to all & wishing everyone a great AF Monday!

Lav

[Byrdlady]

I'm with you on that one, Lav. Seems as if I spent the first half of my life trying to do myself in and the second half trying to preserve what's left! Sure wish I had a do-over.
Pav, like you, I sure wish I had gotten my arms around this sooner....as I look back on things, I knew I had 'issues' around 28 or 29. Naturally, I kept them bottled up (drinking joke). I have a high stress sales job, so all I had to do was look at my coworkers (poster children for Betty Ford Clinics everywhere) and rationalize that THEY could handle it...so I should be able to, also. And so went my 30's AND my 40's. Of course things escalated, but I wasn't that bad. Besides, NOT drinking was UNthinkable, especially in MY line of work, people EXPECT it! You mays well cut off my oxygen, if you're gonna talk like that! Here's the sad part of the story...I wasn't gaining ANYTHING by drinking, in fact, I was LOSING ground. I couldn't see it then, because AL makes you see things differently....(like YOU CAN'T LIVE WITHOUT ME!!!) If I had gained some knowledge about how destructive drinking is....(EVERY DRINK, it's cumulative) I could have avoided a LOT of pain and suffering. I barely remember my 40's. That's pretty sad....pathetic that a 40 something goes around partying like a college student.... I didn't get sober until I was 51. I spent about half my life under the influence of AL.

The moral of the story is that AL is an addictive drug. If you are lucky enough to be in your 20's, 30's, 40's or even 50's, and you are on this site then do yourself a favor and put AL away and don't look back. If you are on this site, the best thing you could do for yourself is quit drinking for good. I hear it all the time around these boards "I want to be a NORMAL drinker" well here is a news flash...if you told a normal drinker he/she couldn't drink anymore, it wouldn't be a big deal. It's a BIG deal to us because we have a PROBLEM with ALCOHOL. When I hear people say that they can't fathom the thought of never drinking again, it solidifies in my head the notion they are the very ones that shouldn't. My hubs is a normal drinker....he can go weeks without and thinks nothing of it! Because he isn't addicted to it like I am. It took me a long time to grow to hate AL like I do. I have a very healthy respect for it, because I know it is trying at all times, to get back in to my life. It wants a 'host' like me to protect it....it wants someone like me to never forsake it and to put it above all else. It want's me to misrepresent myself for it. That's its power. Well, I'm sorry, AL, this is not your day and you are not going to take up residence ONE MORE MINUTE, HOUR, or DAY in this girl. There will be NO special occasions with YOU involved. You have taken all you're going to take from me.

Hope everyone has a really easy day. XO, Byrdie

[lifechange]

Hey Mr. G.-- I am very happy to be back here.. to be taking the steps I need to get my life in order. Good to "see" you!

Ava, thank you for those words of encouragement. I am so happy to hear that Robert made it through the surgery.. that you have some more time together..

Lav and Byrdie, you are both SO right. I have been that pathetic 40 something year old drinking herself blind. Each day, each minute at this point, I'm seeing things more clearly.
Great suggestion with the hypnosis CD'S, Lav.. I've heard you mention them often before, but never really believed they could work.. I guess because I don't understand how they work. Will definitely look into them/something similar.

Our day has turned into one of cloudless blue skies and warm, but not too warm. Perfect June day.

[narilly]

Morning everyone. Un Hung Mon. Love waking up feeling good on a Monday. I have spent far too many Monday's hung over and am grateful for every day I wake up feeling good.

I stopped drinking a few weeks before I turned 50, this was after a 38 year career in drinking. My career included: black outs, car accidents (one where my best friend was killed), falling down stairs, bruises, fighting with friends and my spouse, throwing up and a whole bunch of other things which I don't want to remember right now. It has not been pretty and I will not go back. My plan is to turn 70 and look back and say "I am so glad I quit drinking when I was 50".
Anyway, I am glad you are here Life. I listened to the CD's and made new habits so that drinking was not one of them. I actually went to movies because we can't drink at the theatre here in Canada. There are so many things that you can do to distract yourself from AL.

Rahul, glad you enjoyed the Rockies and all that is there. Emerald Lake is very beautiful, I am lucky to live in such a wonderful part of the world.

Byrdie I totally agree with your post. AL will not take any more from me either!

Have a great day everyone. Don't drink today.

[LilBit]

Heeeyyy, Nesters! I just finished skimming through the last 10 days of postings. My, you've all been busy. Looks like we have some new/returning faces -- welcome. I'm a "comeback kid" myself, so I understand that it sometimes takes a few tries before you get to the "real" one. Glad to see you, here.

'Had a complete technology failure early in the vacation and took it as a Sign that I needed to completely disconnect. Good choice. I wish that I could package the utter sense of relaxation and send it to all of you with a silk ribbon on this Monday morning. For now, close your eyes and try to imagine the feeling of a warm breeze lifting your hair and Rice Krispy-sounding sea foam kissing your toes as a gentle wave swirls back out to sea. (Geez, that sounded way more lascivious than I meant it to. LOL.)

I mentioned in an earlier post that this was the first AF vacation that I can remember -- ever -- in my adult life. If any of you have such a vacation ahead and you're worried that it won't be fun, see the preceding statement about toe-kissing. Heehee, all that aside, it was as enjoyable as any trip I've ever had, and even more so because I fully experienced it. And, while I'm having a "buffer day" today to transition back to the real world, it doesn't have that nasty, guilt/anxiety-ridden, AL-withdrawal feeling to it. The issues are more along the lines of clean-the-dog-hair-tumbleweeds from the living room corners, do battle with that blue furry thing lurking in the back of the refrigerator and try not to dress inappropriately for the climate, all of which are easily doable. 'Had a great skate this morning and bought some fresh pluots on the way home. Good day.

Byrdie, so sorry that you've been sick. Wow, it sounded like a doozy. Glad you're doing better. Pav, I missed reading your posts, too and glad you had a good time with DH. Lav, you should sell your efforts to keep up with the young 'uns and chick 'uns as an exercise plan. And Ava, I was relieved to read that Robert made it through the surgery. You're living up to your user name where he's concerned, and truly being there for him. Kherriot and Hanna, glad to see you here and posting. Hanna, remember that "This too shall pass" and the life that you never imagined can become an unimaginable life. Overit, you sound really upbeat behind that bag. Yay for you! Rahul, the Canadian Rockies are on "my list." 'Sounds so wonderful. LavBlu -- woohoo on your 10 months! Cowboy, great posts about Faith making things possible, not easy and not reacting to your those sudden urges. Speaking of that, great posts NS and Matt about keeping one's quit permanent and wise choice on skipping Vegas, Dutch! Mr G., it is always fun to see you.

'Off to cuddle with the dog who missed me, the cat who also missed me but won't admit it, and the fiance who seems to have missed me very much indeed, which is good for him. Notice the prioritization, there. LB has her head on straight.

[jane27]

Today, I'd like to borrow a few words from our very own, Matt M.

[Mischa]

Just checking in quickly before I pass out (from exhaustion that is!). Got called back to the hospital about 2:00 yesterday afternoon and didn't get home until close to 9:00. I was so tired when I got home that all I could do was go to bed. Divine intervention if you asked me, because I really needed a drink (or thought I did) after all that. There's something about people having heart attacks and such that causes one to have an adrenaline rush! Anyway, went to work this morning after a shitty night's sleep, and ended up leaving early because I was so exhausted. So I'm going to have a nap.

I went another 24 hours without a drink. Imagine that?

[blackflag]

Just checking in before bed, I'm goosed so I'll read back in the morning, but wanted to keep accountable.

BF

[Guitarista]

Yo Nesters near and not so far,

Stay hard indeed. For me, I stay sober when I am pro-active with my plan or program and work it daily. So it takes action. I need to have options/activities I can do to change the scenery in my head at the drop of a hat if need be.

Hope you're feeling a bit better today Ava. I'm glad to hear Robert's surgery had a positive outcome. He's lucky to have a friend like you, as are we.

Lil bit, you're priorities sound like mine when I had my dog and came home after travel. Dog first, then whatever woman I was with at the time. lol.

Wishing all a safe, sober and magical week. Stay hard freaks, and kick some ass in your own in.....imi.....init........inimitable way. G

[Lavande]

Good evening Nesters,

Welcome back Lil, we missed you. Glad you had a relaxing vacation & the dog was happy to see you, ha ha!!!

Hi there G

Mischa, sounds like you are doing just fine. Now get some rest!

I had a good day, not particularly productive but a good one anyway
I am grateful to be healthy & plan to stay that way. My chickens need me, LOL.
Wishing everyone a safe night in the nest!

Lav

[available]

Hi nesters

So good to see you being accountable BF, dont run away and enjoy all we have to offer with support.

An early start for me today so im exhausted. Robert is in a ward and not intensive care so that was wonderful news, he looks good and they didnt do as much intensive surgery as they thought but the cancer has now invaded his large bowel. He wants to get out of hospital and finish his bucket list so fingers crossed.

I have my sadist personal trainer tomorrow but the good news is i am starting to enjoy the free gym membership. It is good stress relief i must say.

In for a cold snap for the rest of the week, i do like winter but it would be much nicer if i could hibernate.

Take care everyone.