Newbies Nest

[LuckyMe]

Thanks everybody. See you on roll call. I realized I need more food around the boat. Like its time to cook again! Those olives sound great. I'm not such a sugar gal, but bigger dinners with lots of veggies and flavor to fill me up is what I'm needing. I've been eating very little and drinking very much. It's time to stock up and get creative so I'm excited about dinner again. Have a great night. I get to work Early when it gets this damn hot...being a gardener. I'm thankful for my clients and will begin hydrated and unhung this monday morning! See ya.

[Mr Vervill]

Wow, some great posts over the past day or so, Lil Bit, Peppersnow, LavB, Pav, Ava, LB, and a few others I'm sure I missed.
Luckyme, what great posts and a great start to your journey. I too like others look forward to hearing about your daily journey.
Like NS said, I want to hear about the down side too, that will help us all with this fight, giving all of us more tools to fight this battle.
LuckyUs! Thank you.
Long Day, Night all.

[Pavati]

Hi, All:

Lucky - That sounds like a GREAT plan. I love your description of the Camino - failure is NOT an option for me, either. There is too much at stake if I were to start drinking again. I love my family, my health, my job too much to mess with that. And I wouldn't want it anyway. I figure I got at least 3 hours a day back when I quit drinking (average), and given that I have been sober for about 500 days, that's 1,500 additional hours I've gotten this year (or about 62 whole days!) that I didn't have the year before. No wonder Byrdie is such an awesome cookie maker (those bikinis!!!)

LavB - I love how your "quick" drop bys are always paragraphs long! I'm glad that little dog has you all to care for it. I feel sorry for the owner, too.

Ava - a mental health day is what the doctor ordered.

I'm heading off on a short family vacation with EVERYBODY. I am armed with my book and a room to escape to if needed. Not sure if I will have Internet access, but I'll be back...

Night,
Pav

[jane27]

I'm heading off on a short family vacation with EVERYBODY. I am armed with my book and a room to escape to if needed. Not sure if I will have Internet access, but I'll be back...

Night,
Pav

:egad: aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh! May the force be with you Pav!

Busy day tomorrow - busted car, new thyroid doctor, and pest removal coming to address the very vocal band of birds that have taken up in our attic. Thankfully, they sleep at night!

Wishing everyone a peaceful night :-)

[Lavande]

Good Monday morning Abbers,

No sunshine for us this morning, rain will be returning this week,
I'm still hoping to do a little catch up weeding though before my veggies disappear completely, ha ha!

Jane, I can imagine birds in the attic are annoying. We had squirrels in the attic of our old house - they sounded like dogs thumping around up there!! Good luck with everything tomorrow.

Wishing everyone a good AF Monday - make it a good week

Lav

[LuckyMe]

Good Morning. Woke up groggy and panicked like I drank last night and I'm sick and late...oh, not so! Habitual response to wake up time? Got to run and get out there to get the coolest hours to garden in. My coffee is kicking in and I am looking forward to another AF day. Have a good one everyone.

[abcowboy]

Howdy all! Hope everyone got through the weekend sober, Long weekends are always hard, but sometimes remembering how we spent previous holidays can be a tool to help us get through the holidays that face us. July 2014, I was still drinking periodically and consumed with urges to drink. Sitting in front of my computer, sick as a dog. Not much different than other times. I don't know why I decided to start coming to this site daily when I did, but so grateful I did. I had gone to AA and other online support forums, but the main thing I liked on MWO, was it is a smaller group of people from all over the world and most were still suffering from drinking and/or continually relapsing. Aside from my family and God, the other thing which has enabled me to stay sober this time, is talking about it or writing about it when I feel like the journey isn’t worth it, or to write something that just might help someone still struggling.

Life still has many of the challenges I turned to alcohol to solve, some have lessened, others not so much. I just know picking up the drink won't solve those issues, so I just do the best I can daily. Some days, when things are tough, I remember I am sober for a while now and am filled with gratitude for the gift of not having to get falling down, pass out drunk. I don't want to go back to drinking, even if it makes one forget for a time, the aftermath is not worth it. Some people can take or leave alcohol, a drink is no big deal to them. I tried to be that type of drinker for years and failed miserably. It is easier and I am happier not picking up the first drink. For those of us still struggling, never give up, it will be worth it in the long run. Every day sober is one more day that you were stronger than you thought you were. Every day sober is one more day that you beat that desire to pick up the first drink. And every day sober is one more day that you proved to yourself that you can do it. And those every day’s start adding up. For all of us, it is, and always will be just one day at a time….

Have a great day/week everyone! Remember, no giving in to that first one eh!

[Byrdlady]

Good Morning, Nesters!
I had a nice time at the Grad Party. Unfortunately, even tho I had already eaten when I arrived, I ate AGAIN! Who can turn down a weenee? I went to bed full as a tick....yuck. It was fun and gosh, what a future that grad has! As I think back to when I was that age, the world was my oyster! That was about 6 years before drinking became an issue for me. As I left the party last night, I hugged her (she is 22)....I noticed she was drinking a beer. "UGG!", I thought to myself! I sure hope that stuff doesn't affect her like it did me.

I hope we kept a full nest over the holiday weekend....check your neighbors and make sure we've got eva-body!!! Go snatch them back in if they took a topple....we ARE our brother's keepers!
Have a great week, everyone! Now back on your heads! xoxo, Byrdie

[Kailey]

Hello. I've been around here for a long time, and gotten close to my goal of being alcohol free only the slip back many times. My intention for years has been to completely stop drinking, so it's never a conscious decision to moderate, it's more like a last-second "what the hell" and I'm drinking before I can stop myself.

I have noticed that it's harder and harder for me to get a drinking free streak going. I think it's because once I'm drinking I think I might as well get a few more days in before I "have to stop" again. Ridiculous, I know.

Ridiculous because I truly want to stop. I am happier… far happier… when I'm not drinking. I don't like myself anymore when I drink and on the flipside I'm pretty damn proud of myself when I don't. I am buckling down for the long haul and I mean the long-haul! I am going to use every failure I've had before to make this last quit stick forever.

I've watched plenty of people succeed since I joined this site. Now it's my turn. I'm ready to do the hard work.

[LilBit]

Welcome back, Kailey. Many of us have fallen prey to the "what the hell" attitude that sucks you back into drinking. It's such an easy little passive decision that seems to quietly creep in, almost without our notice. And, the desire to continue a drinking spell to "get a few more days" in is very common, too. These are some of AL's craftiest weapons. You can forge your own! The toolbox has some great strategies that work and when AL strikes, the nasty bugger won't blindside you. You'll be ready. 'Looking forward to your posts. You can do this.

Dang, Pav! Counting the days you reclaimed from AL this year is brilliant! Good luck on the vacay. [LilBit sits in lotus position, chanting "ohm" and waves the relaxation feather in your direction.]

Byrdie, your "full like a tick" metaphor made me LOL! 'Glad you had a good time and I wish the young lady a successful AF life.

Great post, Cowboy. The term, "wasted" describes our pasts on several levels.

'Had a nice, restful weekend. I'm 1/3 the way through the radiation treatments and trying to pace myself for the next 2 1/2 weeks. Fortunately, there are almost no side effects, aside from the zapped energy. But it makes me want to sleep and eat like Karen's backyard bears.

Happy unhung Monday, all.

[NoSugar]

If you're truly committed to this being your final quit, it's really important to put as many systems in place as possible now, while you're feeling motivated and sure, to protect you when you encounter a good or bad stress, are bored, or just plain crave a drink.

In the beginning, I knew that if I drank I would slink away from MWO and probably never sign in again and I suspect would have once again gotten caught up in the whole mess.

So, I made sure there were a couple MWO friends who could get a hold of me by phone or e-mail. Sure, I could avoid those concerned PMs and posts if I just didn't sign on here but -- my rational self was determined to quit and wanted someone to be able to find me and help me get back on track. I wanted that "threat" hanging over my addicted head. It was a little scary because that addicted part of me wanted to keep the option of getting the heck out of here open. But, because I really, really did want to be done and for sure I meant it this time (!!!), I gave out that personal information and knew there was no way to run and hide. I'd shut that door even tighter.

If I were to drink now, I'm pretty sure I would come back on my own because I know it works but I also am comfortable and feel reassured knowing that there are people who would seek me out and help me if I tried to disappear. We don't have to do this on our own at the beginning - or ever.

[LuckyMe]

Wow. Good reading. Great thoughts. I appreciate them all. Had a great morning working finally hydrated and full of energy instead of shaky and full of damn regret! I didn't swear "I'm quitting today! This is my last hangover!" because that was last Saturday. Cool. I'm tired and hungry but I've got a great Tamale waiting and lots of Seltzer water. I promised myself a nugget from the Tool Box daily so this is it from Jane 27:

When you feel at your lowest and want to let alcohol take control, hang on to the time you have been sober, don’t throw away all your hard work, and most of all remind yourself of why you WANT this so much.

Thanks Jane! After I'm "full as a tick" I'll poke about for more good stuff. See ya.

[Dutch1988]

Celebrating my fourth month of sobriety today. I have to say this has been the hardest month for me, harder than my first 30 days. For me the novelty had worn off at 100 days, I was discouraged to see that no more drinking had not solved all of my problems. Sounds pretty unrealistic, right? I have been fighting with my AL brain for the past two weeks to not drink. The main argument it is throwing at me is see, your life is not any different, if anything, you are farther away from your financial goals than you have ever been, your making less money and you could lose your house, but when you were drinking you kept your shit together, you were less anxious during the day, you could been more extroverted because alcohol charged your batteries, you drank functionally, not to black out. This is the struggle I have been going through.

Reading about the 11 steps of relapse has me very worried. I have been being more compulsive, not exercising as much(since I exercise a lot, I think I am but really I am not as much as I can, I have been doing less than when I drink). I haven't been meditating as much, I haven't been talking positive toward myself or showing myself compassion. I haven't been being grateful daily, I have mostly been stressed out. In the words of one of my favorite comedians, your supposed to worry about the rent getting paid, that's how it &*^%ing get's paid. Instead of feeling worried about it, I feel like I am just trusting everything to work out, which I think is a dangerous place.

It's not like things are hopeless for me, I am more concerned about where my life is headed. I managed to move into the best community where I live last year thanks to my wife's new job, which I know brought her a lot of pride since her parents have never shown a lot of enthusiasm for her choices in life regarding academics/financial decisions. If I started making less money and we had to move, it would hurt her more than anything, which is the last thing I want. She finally decided to work part time after her horrible experience teaching this past year, and I don't want to let her down. It seems when I reflect a lot of my drinking came from having to rise up and take on obligations i didn't feel ready for at the time. I have been reading a book about highly sensitive people and realize how much of it applies to my life, I am going to keep on reflecting on it.

Heading to the park with the family, have a awesome AL free day.

Lucky-it sounds like you have a solid foundation, I would post on here every day to stay sober, it was the place I came to vent my emotions that made me feel better, I think I am going to start again because I actually really enjoy the advice I get on here. I never felt this weak or struggled this much when I was actively posting. I think over time I read my posts and thought they were too whiny, and that discouraged me from posting. I don't recommend being that hard on yourself, we all have a very personal journey we are on here.

Ava-I have been reading daily and think you deserve a mental health day. It can do wonders for recharging batteries when we are not drinking. In the early days I would never tae a mental health day because that much free time would bring me to drink. Now the idea actually kind of appeals to me.

ABC-your post spoke directly to me today, I definitely have problems that have lessened while others have grown since I stopped. Or perhaps the magnifying glass has just been taken to them since I now don't have that beautiful distraction of waking up in a slight haze.

BL-22 was about when my drinking became worse, I was already binge drinking on the weekends and drinking at 3pm on days off. I had no idea that drinking would have such an effect on me, and remember already thinking activities were more fun drinking than not. Scary stuff.

[Lavande]

Good evening nesters,

Wow, great posts today

Dutch, Congrats on your AF time, you are doing great so be proud of yourself. If we could just fix all of our problems instantly..... Unfortunately, things don't work that way. But please keep the faith that everything is going to work out OK for you & your family. Be kind to yourself too.

Lil, I'm glad you mentioned the radiation treatments. I was thinking about that over the weekend, glad they are going as well as possible. Be nice to yourself as well.

Kailey, welcome back, glad to see you! Kicking AL out of your life is a solid decision, one you'll never regret

Well, I officially have a grumpy chicken in my flock as evidenced by the bite mark on the palm of my hand!
11 years of raising chickens ~ this is a first. Not sure what I'm going to do about her yet

Wishing everyone a safe & peaceful night in the nest!

Lav

[little beagle]

Dutch I think we all go through periods when we get discouraged. But believe me they pass. And yes. I believe in reading and posting on a daily basis. I have been sober over two years and think this is my strongest tool. I still use it daily. I believe it helps me as well as others. While not drinking did not cure all the ills in my life, I am living proof that it didn't make anything worse. From my personal relationships, my professional relationships, my finances, my anxiety, my stress levels, these things have gradually improved. Well, finances suck at the moment, but I'm not out there making it worse, and I am working as hard as I can to make it better. Something I wasn't able to do hungover. Hang in there. It will get better.
Marylou I have to tell you I love a good virgin Mary. And I can drink it in the AM or PM. Down here we put lots of fun things in them including pickled green beans, cocktail onions, olives, and of course Tabasco. Pretty yummy. It's almost a meal in itself.
Listening to the radio this morning on the oldies station they played a song call Break My Stride. It got me to thinking about us. Once we get momentum, it's much easier to keep going. Newtons Law of Physics states "An object in motion tends to stay in motion. While an object at rest tends to stay at rest". Once you get the momentum up to stop drinking, keep going. It is just naturally harder to restart. The laws of physics plainly say so.