Newbies Nest

[Overit-still]

Overit, how are you? If for any reason you didn't get around to it yesterday, "7-11" would be an awesome quit day. Such a nice ring to it.

LilBit-I thought the same thing when 7/10 didn't work out, but then it was Saturday and there was always tomorrow, blah...blah....blah...7/14 it is!

[LilBit]

OverIt congrats on your Day 1 and absolutely no judgment here. If I had a dime for every blah-blah one more day that I put myself through, I'd be sitting on a yacht somewhere. 7/14 is a GREAT day!

[Dutch1988]

Glad you made it back in overit! I'm with lilbit, I write things down regularly in a little journal I keep with me, every time I feel like drinking these days I go back and read through the pages at how many times even while drinking I wrote I needed to stop. It doesn't take me long before I realize I need to make this permanent. Let us know if you are ever on the verge, we are here for you!

Ava that is tough news on Robert, your words about not drinking even if he passes really inspire me. My grandpa used to say any excuse will do, I never really correlated it to drinking but I guess it does apply. You really can't let any excuse get in the way of your quit, even accepting the passing of a friend.

I have been feeling a bit more motivated today. I also have been drinking a lot of ginseng with my tea, so that could come to bite me in the ass. I read a while back when my drinking was starting to get worse and I would have hangovers that ginseng would help you metabolize alcohol faster. I would pound a tincture before bed hoping that it would make me feel better in the morning when I knew I drank too much. Couldn't tell you if it actually worked, because obviously I don't remember those days very well haha.

My biggest test coming up on this road to sobriety is a vacation my wife and I had planned. For some GOD FORSAKEN REASON I decided to book it with my inlaws. Follow me down the venus fly trap of stupidity please. At first my inlaws were going to pay for the entire trip, and since it was to Waikiki, Hawaii I was all for it. They even were going to get a Hotel at the Embassy, which has free happy hour. In retrospect, I was excited about this and contemplating taking a vacation from my quit, but I obviously have given up on that idea now. Then my wife tells me after she booked the trip with her dad we split the bill and it was 1600, then my wife tells me its not the Embassy hotel but the Ambassador(google it, it looks like the Motel 6 of the Hawaiian Islands). FIL also got us a room with 3 twin size beds, which must mean he thinks my wife and I and daughter are all sleeping separately? I have never done a vacation without drinking, they are synonymous in my book. I listened to the bubble hour podcast about vacations, but I could use any tips, especially dealing with the inlaws. I'll be there for a full week.

[paulywogg]

Your vacation will be better without al Dutch,you're going to Hawaii sooo much to do,so many memories to build,even with the in-laws

[Matt M.]

Thanks everyone for the kind words regarding my post, probabally sounded like forrest gump wrote it (Im not a smart man) but I say it with conviction.....And for the first time in my Adult life I actually believe I am done with Alcohol, no words can decribe the feeling!

Byrdfreak - I will gladly post it in the infamous "tool box" If I could get you to autograph it first.lease:

overit- Your are welcome to copy anything from me. I hope it sticks for you this time. The old saying I heard time and time again, but convienently chose to ignore it for many years. " I am sick and tired of being sick and tired"

Something i did this time (my last) time around was wrote down any and all things I hated about Alcohol, things I was ashamed of doing while drunk, people I affected, the money spent etc... all of this I wrote in detail as too relive it if you will. This helped to change my entire mindset about Alcohol and see it for the poison it is. If alcohol was not around and was introduced to the FDA and tested today it would be denied unanimously....
Latch on to some people in here with sober time behind them, follow thier every move, and for the record there are no other ways to moderate, I officially tried all them and failed......

Linda- Thinking about you my dear friend <3

Dutch- Your post made me laugh... I must believe you had to have been highly intoxicated when you agreed to a vacation with the inlaws....As far as advice? I got a big bag of nothing on that one...i might consider russian roulette myself as a equal alternative.....stay hard and stay away from high places,ropes, sharp objects and projectiles....:egad:

Pav, Lav, Lil As always great to hear from you ladies! Im sure im forgetting some one,,,sorry

Stay Hard Freaks!!!

[TJAF]

Boy what a visceral reminder on another reason to maintain my sobriety. On my way home today I passed three state police cars on the side of the road and one of the troopers was administering field sobriety tests to an elegantly dressed middle aged women. The anguish painted on her face was obvious even in the seconds it took me to pass her by. As my lawyer friend once told me, once the police start those tests you are already under arrest, even if you don't realize it at the time. I can only hope that after the embarrassment and expense she comes to realize the enormity of the experience. Thank you God I'm sober tonight!

[Lavande]

Good evening Nesters,

I put it another afternoon & evening with my stinky grandsons, ha ha! Tomorrow I'm taking a break from them & going to visit my daughter & granddaughter for some girl time

Dutch, I wish you a wonderful trip to Hawaii. Focus on the weather, the new foods, your wife & daughter.....the good stuff. The in-laws don't need to ruin anything for you - don't let them. A vacation without AL means great memories, great pictures, no regrets

Over-it, great on your day 1, now go for day 2 & so on with no regrets!!

TJ, I am grateful every single day, believe me. That woman is lucky she was stopped before someone got hurt or worse!

Matt, you're turning into a role model around here, like it or not

Wishing everyone a safe night in the nest!

Lav

[Mr Vervill]

I just cant believe that he has fought for so long and so hard but thats the way cancer goes i suppose.
x

Ava,
This is just what you and so many others here do every day, fight for your life. I don't mean to minimize Robert's ordeal, but we are all in a fight for our lives.
Thank you for your compassion.
V-

[Mr Vervill]

Matt, Great posts, as Lav says, whether you like it or not you are becoming a leader here. Happy to follow.
Dutch, the hotel sounds, well, awful. But just think, you only need to sleep there. Spend the rest of the time enjoying everything else the island has to offer. Wear the in-laws out, that way, they'll go back to the hotel while you enjoy the rest!

[Overit-still]

Not gonna lie, questioned being sober at softball tonight, but I had taken my AB so I kept having to remind myself that this is my life now. It wasn't a nail biter because of the AB, choice wasn't on the table. Now I'll sleep great and wake up ready to rock

[Matt M.]

Lav, Mr V. Thank you both for the flattering comments. To say or post something that may help someone in there recovery is so very rewarding. Service to others is just another tool that solidifies our quit. I am in debt from what I've gained in these rooms and I will gladly pay it forward....

Overit~Looks like the AB may have saved you tonight. I've never taken it, and I can see where it has a place in our society. I may very well be wrong (I rarely am 😆- I do however sense that you still look at Alcohol as something your missing out on, or feeling punished because you can't drink like the others? For me, I was doomed everytime when I thought this way.
This didn't come immediately to me, but I believe it has been vital to my quit. My entire mindset and thoughts about Alcohol changed. I consider it a perfectly packaged Poison, they destroys us mentally and physically....

Forgive me if I'm wrong, just a hunch I had. .

[Pavati]

Hi, All:

Over it- Bastille Day was a great day to quit!

Dutch- Rahul described missing happy hour for a swim in the Indian Ocean when he was traveling in India. I have always remembered that description of the beauty and solitude of an evening swim. To me, that warm ocean is the best part of Hawaii. How about an evening swim when you're at your edge, exercise, time alone, and the beautiful ocean. What could be better?

Ava. Love to you. What you are going through is so difficult. Tell Robert that your MWO posse has your back and the Stella for backup. We know you won't be drinking.

I'm on my phone. Too hard to say much more.

Pav

[available]

Evening nest.

Its nice getting home in daylight so winter is on its way out, well half way through.

Dutch the motel sounds like something out of Fawlty Towers. Try and find time for yourself on your holiday. I went with my mum when i was about 100 days and boy was it hard. that woman could drive anyone to start drinking sometimes but when "it" all became too much i had some ME time and that helped sort my emotions out. I felt more anger than anything probably as i could not drink and it wasnt mums fault. I felt proud after my first holiday sober i do remember that, i had accomplished a first, one of many these days.

MrV, very true, we are all fighting for our lives, i have fought for mine and I am winning, many dont, my brother didnt due to al.

Overit, if anything puts you in a situation where you feel you will drink then dont go AB or not. i never put myself in situations that i knew i could not deal with for the first few months. i used to stare at people drinking for gods sakes feeling so deprived and it was not worth it so i avoided those situations. You can do this. You dont drink.

Pav, Robert always asks about my mwo buddies and i always pass on everyones love. he was very very tired today, fell asleep on me, i said i must be boring him to tears! Someone told him he looked really good, i told him he looked really bad. He laughed and said "you are the only one that is honest". Oops! The drs were shocked when he said he was refusing IV daily so they said he may be able to come in every 2nd day, he is not well enough to do that but he has hope.

Matt now a role model! Wow thats impressive i must say. Thanks for your kind words friend.

Well thank god its Friday tomorrow is all i can say.

Take care everyone and Lil, hope you and the dog are going well.
x

[Lavande]

Good morning Nesters, happy Thursday to all

It's sunny & not overly warm here today so I'm going to go enjoy a day with my girls. A little lunch & shopping is just what I need after many days of dealing with my grandsons (dirtballs), haha!

Over-it, do yourself a huge favor & use some hypno recordings to help change your thinking about AL. I used the ones produced by MWO but there are others out there. Your sub-conscious soaks up all that info while you are sleeping - works miracles

Ava, I hope Robert remains as comfortable as possible on his journey. I know your love & constant support is a great source of comfort to him :hug:

Greetings to all & sending wishes for a wonderful AF day for all!

Lav

[Byrdlady]

Good Morning, Nesters!
Great to see everyone checking in!

Dutch....a vacation in Hawaii! As you may recall last month I went to Boston and Cape Cod on my vacation. It was cold and it rained sideways most days, but it was wonderful to me, I wasn't at work! A bad day on vacation is better than a good day at work! Bah! It's all in the mindset. My biggest tip for how to survive a vacation is to take us with you....I mean, make time to check in every day. That's what I do....there is always 5 minutes to be accountable I even did it on my phone and I can't see spit! You've got good, solid time under your belt so there is NO reason you can't come out the other side. Vacations are inevitable and there will be a first at some point, so this mays well be it. Focus on being present...appreciate the here and now. Play forward what that ONE fruity drink with the umbrella WILL do to us...like pouring gasoline on a fire. Remember to EAT! Reward yourself with an ice cream or a delicious cookie instead! We've got your back, so use us!!

Over-it. Congrats on Day 1. Like Matt, I get the sense that this is something you feel you are doing TO yourself, not FOR yourself. Feeling deprived sucks, I don't care who you are...so turning that around in my head is what I try to do. Like Narilly's byline says "I can have the life I want, or I can drink". That about sums it up for us. We are either going to slowing kill ourselves with AL, or we are going to fight our way out of the rabbit hole. If you really think about it, when was the last time AL did you any favors? What GOOD has it done us? Where did giving in get us? Also, lead yourself NOT into temptation! The first few weeks are hard enough without subjecting ourselves to added pressures. It's like being on a strict diet and going to an all you can eat buffet! Who can do that? Or having a peanut allergy and going to a Planter's Convention! Keep yourself safe....no one else will do this for us...we have to be very selfish and look after ourselves. This is YOUR time. I know you can do this....we believe in you! I see your date stamped on your bag now, so off we go. SLAM the door on AL and take it off the table as an option! It's just NOT an option!

Ava, gentle hugs to you. I wish we were there to give those hugs in person. Not sure I have ever seen such a selfless person as you. Hang in there and take care of yourself, too.
Mr. V, always a pleasure! Have a great day everyone! The weekend's in sight! Byrdie