Newbies Nest

[NoSugar]

I think it is important to change things up.

I sure agree with this, TJAF! There is no reason to repeat the same experiment over and over and expect a different result. You've got to change a variable and see if that is what makes the difference for you. And if it doesn't, don't give up but change a different variable and try again. I truly believe there is a way for each of us to end our addiction and as soon as we truly want to be free, we'll find it. Like is often posted, you have to want to quit more than you want to drink.

LC, It is great to hear you're not paying attention to that voice! The good news is that is will get quieter and you'll hear it less often as time goes on. I honestly cannot remember the last time I heard it. Hang in there, Friend. xx

[Coco--Nut]

Back to give it another shot...

Day 4 for me... I have been absent from MWO for quite some time. Can someone point me in the direction of the Toolbox? I'm sure it is staring me right in the face but for the life of me, I can't find it. I remember if was quite helpful :happy2:

[LilBit]

Day 4 for me... I have been absent from MWO for quite some time. Can someone point me in the direction of the Toolbox? I'm sure it is staring me right in the face but for the life of me, I can't find it. I remember if was quite helpful :happy2:

Here you go, Coco. Welcome back and congrats on Day 4. If you ever need the link again, Byrdie has it in her signature (thanks, Byrdie)!

https://www.mywayout.org/community/showthread.php?24253-Tool-box

Happy Monday, all.

Pav, I read your post with all its hidden elaborations and nuances. It was fantastic.

Ican, welcome back. I'm an old-timer/new-timer, too with almost 5 months under my belt. Your user name is right -- you CAN!

Only three more days of rad treatments, including today. I will be so happy to put this chapter of my life behind me, among other things.

OK, for fun, let's play "guess the object." Hint #1. I just purchased this thing online. Hint #2. It's functional actually serving a purpose beyond decoration. Any guesses?

[Byrdlady]

Here you go, Coco. Welcome back and congrats on Day 4. If you ever need the link again, Byrdie has it in her signature (thanks, Byrdie)!

https://www.mywayout.org/community/showthread.php?24253-Tool-box

Happy Monday, all.

Pav, I read your post with all its hidden elaborations and nuances. It was fantastic.

Ican, welcome back. I'm an old-timer/new-timer, too with almost 5 months under my belt. Your user name is right -- you CAN!

Only three more days of rad treatments, including today. I will be so happy to put this chapter of my life behind me, among other things.

OK, for fun, let's play "guess the object." Hint #1. I just purchased this thing online. Hint #2. It's functional actually serving a purpose beyond decoration. Any guesses?

Caitlin Jenner's new hat?

[LilBit]

LOL! Great try, Byrdie.

Edit: Oh dear. If the object's "function" is to hide that bad plastic surgery job, I'm all for it.

[Overit-still]

Here we go again! I know I said I would come here first if I was going to drink but wouldn't you know I was conveniently without my phone. BLECH! EXCUSES!

I will tell you that I had the worst hangover of my life! I woke up at 5:30 AM with the worst headache. Tried taking some pain reliever which then I would just puke up. I was so miserable. Puking when you have nothing to puke. THEN to make matters worse had made plans to go to the fair with another family. I didn't even shower or brush my teeth. I couldn't eat any fair food which is my favorite part of the fair or go to see the animals because of their smell. It was so hot. I was an absolute mess! My husband is having issues with his drinking too. I don't know what will happen with that but I know that I need to stop this madness. I will be really sick or dead if I don't.

You don't have to believe me because lying is what this alcoholic is good at.

[LilBit]

Overit, you're here. You haven't given up. That is ALL that matters. You WILL tame this beast. You're much stronger than you know.

[Dutch1988]

Overit I remember the last time I went hungover to the zoo. It was the day after last christmas, and the bright light of san diego, headache pounding, the stomach pains all made it so much less enjoyable.My daughter was so cute and I enjoyed it, but I kept thinking about how bad I felt and definitely could not enjoy it to the fullest. I actually started thinking about taking a year off from drinking then, but then I kept thinking about how it was the holidays and blah blah blah. How'd you not have your phone on you? Could you have made it a priority? There's always today, right?

LC I teach kajukenbo, which is a great mixed martial art and I have dabbled in about a dozen other styles to try and pull into the system I teach. I currently spend most of my time doing brazilian jiu jitsu, and love it to death.

It's my Monday off, and even though I still teach kids for four hours in the morning I love coming home and spending time with my wife and daughter. I haven't worked five days a week for the past 7 and a half years, so being able to work four hours in the morning and enjoy the rest of my day is awesome. This ringworm thing is still pink skin, but I am going to swing by tomorrow and have the instructor tell me if I am good to grapple. My wife isn't treating me like I am quarantined anymore, which is always nice =P

My plan to not drink was to workout at the gym monday-thursday at night with my friend, late! Like get home at 1pm late! This helped me on the weekdays, and weekends I always made plans that put me away from drinking and doing something I would enjoy. Well since May I haven't been going to the gym since my gym buddy moved away, I have been doing p90x instead as my workout, which has been nice, but not as good as going to the gym with a good periodized workout. Still weight training has kept me away from drinking and I feel better about myself so that's nice.

[Guitarista]

https://www.mywayout.org/community/showthread.php?24253-Tool-box

OK, for fun, let's play "guess the object." Hint #1. I just purchased this thing online. Hint #2. It's functional actually serving a purpose beyond decoration. Any guesses?

Is it some sort of modesty apparel?

All the best with the rad treatment Lil!

Hi Coco!

Great TED talk on addiction and the importance of connection. It talks about how as humans we need to bond to something, so if we can't find it in say, healthy relationships, work, etc. some of us will find that bonding with booze/other drugs. Thanks to Londoner for posting this on another thread.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PY9DcIMGxMs

Take care out there and kick some arse in your own ini....inim.....inimitable and glorious way.

[Pavati]

Hi, All:

My guess is some sort of duster, Lil, although not nearly as creative as the previous guesses. I could also see it as a Phyllis Diller wig...

Overit - Keep trying, my dear. You'll make it stick one of these times. I know - THIS TIME! Take a look at TJAF's post - what will change? For me, it was acceptance - I can't drink and keep the life I want, and I finally accepted that. Once I did that, I HAD to ask for help, because all of my attempts at solo moderation did not work. It is humbling and requires courage to overcome a lot of fear - fear of living without alcohol, fear of being judged as "no good" because I'm an alcoholic, fear of setting aside my ego and admitting that I needed help. Don't waste another precious day to alcohol - you're worth more than that.

G - I watched that talk, too. I DO believe in those connections. I DO however, know that alcoholism and addiction can still happen to people with many connections. I wonder what he would say to that? It does call into question that whole "tough love" movement.

OK - I am off to meet a former colleague for "a beer." I never know what to say when I am asked to go out for "a beer." I usually just say yes and order something else when I'm there, but sometimes to avoid the awkwardness at the restaurant I say up front that I don't drink. This time I did the former. I STILL have fear of being judged professionally because of alcohol, so these colleague meet and greets make me a little anxious. I know I won't drink, but I don't like having to negotiate the whole thing. It irritates me (and I KNOW what you're going to say, Lav - I just don't seem to have your chutzpah quite yet).

Good night, Nest.

Pav

Edit: And congratulations to almost being done, Lil. I know that must be hard to go through. xo

[Overit-still]

So, if I'm going to be completely honest, my day one has to be 7/21 since I was up till about 2AM today drinking. I HAVE to be honest with myself first.

[Guitarista]

Here we go again! I know I said I would come here first if I was going to drink but wouldn't you know I was conveniently without my phone. BLECH! EXCUSES!

I will tell you that I had the worst hangover of my life! I woke up at 5:30 AM with the worst headache. Tried taking some pain reliever which then I would just puke up. I was so miserable. Puking when you have nothing to puke. THEN to make matters worse had made plans to go to the fair with another family. I didn't even shower or brush my teeth. I couldn't eat any fair food which is my favorite part of the fair or go to see the animals because of their smell. It was so hot. I was an absolute mess! My husband is having issues with his drinking too. I don't know what will happen with that but I know that I need to stop this madness. I will be really sick or dead if I don't.

You don't have to believe me because lying is what this alcoholic is good at.

I believe you Over it! The self care nosedive in your post that excessive boozing brings stands out to me. It is just a continuing downward spiral no matter how we look at it when we are in trouble and look to booze for relief. It sure is a quick fix, but we know the side effects. Feeling and looking ugly every morning/day, and our self care and self respect take a big nosedive into a hole that knows no depths. We stop when we die. Or we stop when we stop taking the poison that masquerades as the answer to our situation.

Glad you posted. C'mon my friend. You are worth it and you can do this. :happy2:

Pavi. Yep, many of us with connections still get into trouble. But maybe we can still feel alone and don't feel we are bonding to our satisfaction even with connection. My question would be....what is the quality and importance to me of those current connections? Am I feeling happy , fulfilled and safe, and if not, why not? Sadly, I would turn to the quick and potentially deadly fix of booze /other drugs to fill an emptiness inside. A quick fix it is, but for me, I know what follows. It will open up the door to a 24/7 desire to check out and get numb, and a life of oblivion, pain and self hatred until an all too early grave.

It is up to me to stand up and fight for my right to choose. The decision is mine. Oblivion and an early grave, or life and it's infinite possibilities.

[available]

Overit, may i ask where you are getting the al from? Is it in the house? Thats way too much temptation if you want to stop drinking. If you are going to get al then distract yourself. Come on here, have a shower, put your pj's on, eat. As long as you keep giving excuses to yourself that it is ok then you will drink. I had a litany of bloody excuses before i gave up drinking and also when i had first stopped. My best was "god i am not as bad as half of them on MWO". i am exactly the same as everyone here.

Lil, i have no damn idea what that thing is! Glad your rad treatment is nearly over for you.

Dutch i have way too many memories of days spoilt with a hangover. I remember taking the kids to the markets once and sitting in the guttering vomiting up nothing. That was when i did vomit as i stopped that years ago. It all went down and nothing came back up. You are sounding good.

I am starting to love the gym in the morning, people are starting to notice all the effort i have put in so that is nice. I was having a coffee with a work colleague today who knows i am an alcoholic and we were talking about gratitude and how i had to learn to be grateful again. She has never practiced gratitude so us alkies are at a total advantage of appreciating more than others. Thats the way i interpreted it anyways.

Back to the grindstone for me. Not as cold as yesterday.
Take care xx

[LilBit]

'Loved the guesses. Mr. G, I can always count on you for a unique "spin" on things. The thing is actually a pair -- it's a set of soakers, which are used to wipe one's blades and then stretch over them after ice skating to soak up the residual water, keep the metal dry and protect the sharpening. Without them, a $500-$700 set of blades can quickly rust. But, I will consider using them for all the things you guys mentioned, too.

[Matt M.]

OK - I am off to meet a former colleague for "a beer." I never know what to say when I am asked to go out for "a beer." I usually just say yes and order something else when I'm there, but sometimes to avoid the awkwardness at the restaurant I say up front that I don't drink. This time I did the former. I STILL have fear of being judged professionally because of alcohol, so these colleague meet and greets make me a little anxious. I know I won't drink, but I don't like having to negotiate the whole thing. It irritates me (and I KNOW what you're going to say, Lav - I just don't seem to have your chutzpah quite yet).

Good night, Nest.

Pav

Edit: And congratulations to almost being done, Lil. I know that must be hard to go through. xo

Good evening All

Quick check in at work

Pav- Me too with every word you said after OK- except going to meet a colleague for a "beer"
I feel exactly the same way, in my line of work I feel a person would be less judged if they rode up on a unicorn than if they "didn't drink". Fucking beat down...:egad:
Thanks for sharing that my friend.

Ava- Excercise can be infectious especially when you and other's notice gains...that's the best way to stay hard

Lil- A boa? Neck wrap thingy? F! If I know....Glad your here btw...

Mr G , Dutch, LC, ByrdLover and whoever else I'm sure I missed.... Great to see everyone checking in!!!