Newbies Nest

[LilBit]

Happy B-day wishes to our favorite cakeologist!

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Hope it's the BEST day, Byrdie. You deserve it.

[Byrdlady]

It was a great day! My 5th sober Birthday. We had a great time on the cruise, there were 6 passengers and the captain and his wife. She started out serving wine! My hubs declined and then even he caved to the peer pressure. Between the other 5 passengers they drank 5 bottles of wine and hubs had 2 glasses. Yes, I do keep score. The louder they laughed, the louder I laughed! Only I know that I will wake up tomorrow with my quit intact. Now that I have my confidence, being the only nondrinker doesnt make me uncomfortable at all. In fact, I think that a couple of the others wish they could stop. I was amazed at the amount of AL they drank. It affected them, too. I used to think that I was hiding it back in the day, but I dont know how you could NOT tell I was drinking. Their eyes got heavy and they started talking louder and closer. We even got I love you's from a couple of them.
Let me tell you, this confidence didnt come overnight, but it did come! Happy halloween to all and thank you so much for the warm wishes. Best Birthday EVER! Byrdie

[Matthew6]

Happy birthday!! And great job!

[planetjanet]

Hello Everyone,

[B]I was advised to forward my thread that I posted on Just Starting Over. Wow, things have change so much on this site and I have feel so lost :sad: Okay, so here is my thread I posted this morning, looking forward to hanging out with you guys :congratulatory:

I am old member of MWO and didn't know where to post this because in a sense I am "STARTING OVER" again. I had one year of AF and well I am sure you guys know the story that follows afterwards. If you don't, well I'll tell you....it's the old well maybe I can have just one and the next thing you know it, you saying to yourself "okay, I drink but after that I will go AF". HA! It's been THREE years from the time I decided to just have that one drink and I have to say it's been HELL! Once again, the lies, the guilt, lost jobs, being stuck in bed all day physically sick from being hung over and the worse of all is the two week drinking binges where I start drinking in the morning.....YUCK! There is one good thing that came out of this last drinking binge and that was I recorded myself drinking and wow I am so glad I did. It was nice to see myself drinking because it was definitely an eye opener. I AM AN ALCOHOLIC! I will be watching this video every so often as a reminder and will also be seeking other avenues to really work on putting 100% into my sobriety this time, the last time I didn't which probably I drank. I have to admit that in the back of my mind I was thinking maybe one day I can have a drink. NO, I CAN'T and that's what I need to really, really come to terms and accept, otherwise I will either be homeless or worse DIE!

It wasn't all bad, I did manage to run 7 half marathons and the LA Marathon, however it was ALWAYS my excuse to drink afterwards because I did these events and when I drank...it was to get drunk! Anyway, I am here again to see if any of you wonderful MWO would like to join me in a AF day count and the usual it's best to start one day at a time. During those 3 years, I did manage to get 30 days AF but again would just go back to drinking and so as did when I had started my thread ANYONE UP OF 30 DAYS AF (if you get a chance read it) doing 30 days is a good start! Thanks for reading and I look forward to hearing from you. Oh and sorry for the typos


Janet
AF Day 4

[idefineme]

Welcome back, Janet. As of tomorrow, I'm totally with you on the 30 days AF ... and I will read that thread. Byrdie challenged me to doing a 30 day AF go, so I'm thinking this is my time. I'm glad you came back!

[ssd858]

Hi! I am new here, been lurking for awhile. I am with your Janet and Idef for the 30 days AF!
Today is day 1 for me.

[available]

welcome newbies and Janet your story just reiterates why i can never have one drink and i have to be vigilant with my sobriety. Thank you.
Define and SSD i did the 30 days when i started, promised i would on mwo and I did. It wasnt easy but anything good in life isnt easy to get. I had not done 2 days straight so 30 was a challenge in itself. After the 30 of course i thought i had achieved "non drinking" status and thought long and hard on maybe having one as i did 30 days but i kept going, what did i have to lose. A lot actually but today i am proud to say i am one month off two years sober and those first 30 days got me to freedom. You can all do this and you all need to realise that being an alcoholic is a lifelong journey to sobriety with lots of ups and downs. Its a journey to freedom and finding out who you really are. I have no regrets even though some days i just so wanted to drown myself in al, i came on here and posted and reached out. This has been one of the hardest challenges of my life, raising 4 children was a piece of cake compared to stopping drinking but now i have my life back. I have what al took from me, a life.

We are here for you, post away and you all can do this.

[Matthew6]

Day two for me and I'm on board for the challenge. My original post was to hold me accountable so this is great.

[Lavande]

Good evening Nesters,

Hello & welcome to SSD & Matthew! Welcome back Janet!
Glad to have you all on board with us, we're a nice group
Getting those first few AF days under your belt is tough. By the time you reach 30 days you will be amazed! We begin to heal physically & really begin to feel human again!! It's worth the effort, honestly.

Byrdie, I am happy you had a good birthday. I guess your cruise mates will be feeling rough tomorrow!!

Wishing everyone a safe & comfy night in the nest!

Lav

[Pavati]

Hi, Everyone:

HAPPY BIRTHDAY, BYRDIE! Thanks for baking, Lil - I was wondering who would dare to make a cake for the master...

Welcome back, Janet, and welcome others. Thanks for sharing your story, Janet. Every now and again the thought crosses my mind that maybe I am cured, and maybe I AM the one for whom it will be different. I am glad to have that reminder.

I went briefly to a Halloween party, and am happily tucked in bed with a great book.

Night!
Pav

[starty]

Good morning everyone. Today is day 7 after a 15 month relapse. Feeling better and more positive than for a long while. Funnily enough, I don't feel I have thrown away 6 years sober, rather those 6 years will hold me in good stead for the coming months. I KNOW this can be done and I KNOW it will be worth it.
Have a wonderful day xx

[abcowboy]

Wow, love seeing all the new members! People who are committed and trying to make their lives better, for themselves and those around them. Stick with it guys and gals, it will get better and easier!!

[Lavande]

Good Sunday morning Nesters,

Congrats on your 7 AF days Starty!!!
That's a great solid start. Stay tuned & let's keep going

Halloween parties for adults Pav? Just another excuse to drink IMHO
Glad you got yourself out of there safely.

I am expecting a visit from my granddaughter & her family today so it's going to be a busy one for me, ha ha!

Lav

[j-vo]

Good Sober Sunday Morning. I've had a great weekend visiting Mom and Dad. Got much needed rest, helped mom do things she needed help with, and am so darn grateful now that I feel good. Will be heading back to my side of the state this afternoon, and tomorrow...jury duty! I think I would have been annoyed to have to report for jury duty, but for some reason, I welcome the change in my schedule. Something different and change of pace.

Idefineme, no need to be intimidated by anyone on this site. What we have is awesome support, endless knowledge and tools, and the encouragement we need to ensure success. The years I have of learning about alcoholism, I believe, is an advantage I have right now. But everyone can have that. Read as much as you can, learn, listen, and be grateful for everyday that you are sober. I looked for the youtube video and couldn't find it. But I think NS knows which one I'm talking about. He's the doctor who was thrown in prison for being under the influence of narcotics and while he was in prison he read and learned about addiction. NS, do you know which one I'm referring to? FEAR of the unfamiliar...yes, it's unfamiliar, and that can cause anxiety. There's no doubt that being in unfamiliar territory creates that fear, but it's a much safer place to be IMHO. It doesn't feel good at first. I remember my first year of teaching, I was incredibly afraid, had so much anxiety, and almost every night I cried. But I got through that first year, and the second year was a little better. I took me a long time to become confident in my ability as a teacher. I think every new situation requires effort, patience, and time to become comfortable. That's why early sobriety is tough. We are trying to escape an addiction that has ruled our lives for decades. We are babies and learning to crawl first, then walk. We will run eventually, but we have to put the work in.

I don't consider alcohol my friend anymore. He was a companion, but an abusive companion. One that ruled my life, caused me pain and agony, so much that I don't know the person I really am. Now, I hate the companion. He took so much life from me, and I refuse to let that happen anymore.

I feel I'm a pretty determined person, and when I fail at something, I get pissed off. Really pissed. I've gotten the A's, distinguished evaluations, and I get the job done. But...I have never been able to beat this monster long-term. I'm grateful for your post Plant Janet. It's a good reminder that we will never get away with having one drink. Ever. I give up!!! I will not fight the bastard anymore. I will live, and I know it's not gonna be easy, I will give it all I have. I get it that life is life and there are ups and downs. But I want those ups and downs with a clear head, confidence, and all of my senses in tact.

Welcome Planet Janet, SSD!

Happy Birthday Byrdie. I know the situation you were in yesterday would have been difficult for me. I know that confidence will come. Last night, I thought about all the Halloween parties, but I reminded myself that I am in a safe place, clear-headed, and I won't be hating myself the next day. I thought about all that I was grateful for, and I went to bed with a great sense of peace.

Have a great Sober Sunday All.

[NoSugar]

You sound like a new woman, J-vo, and different to other quits. Once we truly accept our situation, every thing changes. And really, is accepting that we can't drink something really that big of a deal? Other people, including your mom, are accepting and gracefully handling much bigger challenges.

Here's a link to Kevin McCauley's lecture. I'm not on board with everything he says but think his ideas re:stress (and inappropriate responses to it) are at the root of so much of our problem.

Great to see the Nest in action!